Those who have lost weight, how do you set goals?

The goals I've set for myself before were tangible things, like shoes or a massage. Somehow, they were never enough motivation, and I would fail and just end up buying whatever it was anyway and then feel guilty about it. This time, my goal is to tackle the issues I have with food. My first goal is to stop eating when I'm full. (I have noticed that I just keep eating at meals because it's there and it tastes good.) When I feel like I have a handle on that, I'm going to try to stop my "emotional eating".
It's only been a few weeks, but I'm feeling much better about these goals, and I don't feel like I'm in a hurry or rush.
Just my two cents.

I set a final goal. I want to weigh x number of pounds with x % body fat. Then I put that goal away, because starting out wanting to lose half my body weight looked impossible. Just completely overwhelming. So my mini goals (which I don't 'celebrate' other than buying new clothes as needed) are always the next 10 lbs - a totally attainable goal. Every time I hit the next mark (Oh yay, I'm 249! or... Yes! I've hit 179! or whatever) I give myself some lame fist bumps in the privacy of my bathroom and then it's on to the next 10 lbs.

I also find setting fitness goals in there takes the scale worshiping down to a minimum. For example, this week I'm trying to put another 5 minutes on the time I'm able to run as well as a few other small fitness goals - which are things that honestly feel just as good as seeing the scale drop.

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I've lost nearly 50 pounds over the last 8 months. I didn't set mini goals and in the beginning, I didn't even set an end goal. My "secret" is that I decided to diary every piece of food that I put in my mouth - and I mean everything even if I overate by 1000 calories. I decided that I was only hurting myself if I "hid" what I had eaten by not logging it.

This is pretty much me too - I don't have a set goal and I don't have mini goals. Its just not my personality type I guess - it seems to work well for some people and others don't care at all. I've lost about 40 lbs in 5-6 months but the first 10 lbs were almost entirely due to a really nasty flu that had me sick for 10 days (plus the first 10 are easy).

The "secret" for me is not goals - its to make a plan where I never FEEL like I'm dieting. I don't walk into a restaurant and think "oh god I won't be able to eat anything here!" and on free donut day at work (only once a month) I have a donut. I try to stick to some very basic things like getting as much protein as I can without feeling like I am forced to eat food I don't really like (I do have to supplement with protein powder but its only 150 calories for 30 grams of protein so its not a huge sacrifice).

I also have my weekly weight loss goal set relatively low - I started at 1lb a week and I dropped it down to .5lb/week. Meaning I eat a LOT more calories per day than some people do - an average day for me (with some exercise in it) is about 1850 calories which gives me a lot of food flexibility

As soon as I feel like I can't eat X or do Y because I'm "dieting" I get very unhappy. As long as I do things that keep myself from feeling that way, the weight is coming off slow and steady.

That's just me though - otehr people seem to be much more successful when they are very restricted and couldn't follow a diet liek mine.

I just set myself a goal weight and ate what MFP told me I could eat. I don't have cheat days, I don't go over my calories. I usually aim to be significantly under, even now I am maintaining. I just stuck to it. At times I was cold and tired and miserable and just wanted toast with a ton of butter, but I don't. There aren't any tricks or tips. You just have to set a goal and stick to the calories it takes to get you there. Change the way you think about it. These are your rules now.

I was feeling the same way as you, I could not find my motivation and I felt very lost until I read this about 3 weeks ago, its from an Atkins email I received, I'm not doing atkins though. It made a lot of sense to me and sparked my determination to finally lose weight! Then just recently I found MFP. I've been on MFP for 2 weeks and have lost 5 pounds....and still going strong. Hope this helps you like its helped me !

S.M.A.R.T.: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Timely:

Specific: Just saying you want to lose weight is not specific enough to motivate or guide you during your weight-loss journey. Sit down and decide exactly how much weight you want to lose. As an example, setting a weight-loss goal of 30 pounds is more specific.

Measurable: Track your progress by weighing yourself once a week and using a measuring tape to measure your chest, waist and hips. Even if the scale doesn’t move every week, it’s still possible you are losing inches. Also, don’t forget to check how your clothes are fitting. Write all of these observations down in a journal every week.

Attainable: Your goals should be challenging, yet still possible to achieve with the resources you have on hand.

Realistic: It didn’t take you a week or a month to gain the weight you are trying to lose, so don’t set yourself up to fail by expecting you can lose that much weight in an unrealistic amount of time. Typically, you can expect to lose about one to two pounds a week.

Timely: Setting a deadline is a powerful way to motivate yourself to achieve your goals. If your goal is to lose 30 pounds, give yourself four months to make that happen.

Here are a few other suggestions for harnessing the power of goals and making the most of your journey:

Spread the word. Sharing your goals with others makes them even more of a reality and your friends, family and co-workers can hold you accountable.

Write them down. Record your goals in a journal. Writing them down makes them that much more of a reality.

Set multiple goals. What else do you want to accomplish besides losing weight? Do you want to be able to run around the park with your kids? Or lower your cholesterol or blood pressure by a certain number of points? Tackle a new challenge at work? Sit down and brainstorm all the possible things you’d like to accomplish and pick three to five of the most important goals you’d like to focus on first.

Set small daily and weekly goals. This keeps you moving forward and it also gives you a chance to see how all you’re doing adds up to help you achieve your bigger goals. For example, sit down each week and decide what you want to accomplish. Maybe your goal is to bring home-cooked lunches to work every day (instead of hitting the fast-food drive-thru). Write this goal down and check in at the end of the week to see if you were able to accomplish it.

Review your goals every day. Post them on your mirror, computer monitor or refrigerator or program them as a reminder in your smartphone so that you will see them often.

You've gotten great responses here. What works for me it to focus on the process rather than the result. I establish goals and rewards for the process = logging, staying under calorie goal, eating healthy, and exercising. After a period of time passes where I do one or all (or something specific like keep sodium low), I reward myself. When I set certain goal weights, etc. I often get off track if I don't reach them. I have control over the process. Nothing more.