Why don't people get it?
chicagocubsfan23
Posts: 186
I only have about 10-15 more lbs to lose, but I really don't look like it. I'm more concerned about losing the fat and toning up. I know right now is crucial to eating right and not going overboard with the wrong types of foods. I am trying very hard to eat what kind of food I need to in order to get the muscle and lose the fat. Of course my office ALWAYS has some type of food sitting around for everybody. Today it's Panera Bread's bagels. I am so in love with Panera Bread, but I am doing good and saying no. My supervisor won't let it go. It's so aggravating. He keeps telling me "there's low fat cream cheese" "one bagel isn't going to hurt" and all this other crap. Seriously please stop I don't want a damn bagel. But that's how it always starts. I am always good at saying no at first, then somebody comes along with their persuasiveness and I eventually cave because they won't stop talking about it and it's all I think about. Then after one bad thing during the day it leads me to another. Why can't people just respect that I want to do this for myself? Just because YOU don't think I need to lose any weight doesn't mean I'm happy with where I am right now!
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Replies
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I don't know. Let me know when you figure it out.
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No one is forcing you though. You still make all your own decisions. If you want it bad enough you will continue to say no. Or fit the bagel in your daily calorie allowance0
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I completely understand. i am the same way, it doesn't appear as though there is anything wrong with me but I am not physically in the shape I PERSONALLY want to be in. Honestly, I think a lot of it has to do with the other person and them not being happy with their own body. Misery loves company. Keep saying no. Explain to them very kindly that you just don't eat those things because of how much you care about being healthy and fit.0
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No one is forcing you though. You still make all your own decisions. If you want it bad enough you will continue to say no. Or fit the bagel in your daily calorie allowance
No, but when they continuously try to get me to take a bagel, it gets harder and harder to say no. What I am saying is, they should respect me and what I am doing enough to let it go. If they ask and I say no, that should be the end of it. And it isn't about how many calories right now, it's about what kind of calories0 -
How about putting a huge note on your desk (or your forehead for emphasis
) that says "I DON'T WANT A DAMN BAGEL!" 0 -
Most people have good intentions. They don't want to see you depriving yourself. Keep saying no and remember that they mean no harm.0
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jealousy0
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Oh sister-I feel you. Seriously, when people say-you want to lose more!?!! Where from? I want to say-would you like me to strip for you so I can actually point out all the places I still have fat on my body. Of course I know I will always have some sort of fat, but there is a little left that I would like off my body. Trust me I feel you, stay strong and don't give in!!! It will make your final goal that much better!!0
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Punch a b*tch out :-D0
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It is hard to keep saying no...What I have done in the past if they keep pestering me to join in, I take the bagel to my desk and break some off and throw it away and let ppl notice it's missing some and then eventually just throw all of it away (lol). i know it's wasting food and i feel bad (but I would feel worse if I ended up caving in) but if they act like one bagel belongs to me then i feel like I can do wit it what i choose. Don't cave !!!! stay strong!!!! lol0
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Have you mentioned anything to your boss or the people you work with? From how it sounds, it seems like maybe your boss just feels bad that you're not eating anything with them (kind of leaving you out). Next time, just tell him No, Thanks, You appreciate it. And then mention how great you're doing, what your goal is, and that him offering the food like that makes it even harder for you. Maybe ask him to pick up some fruit next time he brings in breakfast?
I had a co-worker that did that kind of stuff on purpose, to try and get me to cave in and eat stuff I shouldn't. She put a box of cookies on my desk once, so I "accidentally" slammed my chair into her. ;-)0 -
How about putting a huge note on your desk (or your forehead for emphasis) that says "I DON'T WANT A DAMN BAGEL!"
Hmmmm I like this idea... Maybe I'll change the signature on my e-mails to say something to this effect0 -
Sometimes I think that sort of thing is fuelled a bit from jealousy too. I find it very frustrating though, not so much the temptation but more the fact that people can't respect someone else's choices (especially if they are positive choices).
I find this happens a lot with drinking too. My ex chose not to drink and it got to the point where he didn't like going out because people would try and force alcohol on him because they thought he should be drinking, even though he explained it was his decision not to.0 -
:drinker: HERE HERE!!!
I was in the same boat and I was very sick of listening to people tell me how skinny I was.0 -
Have you ever read any of the books by Jennifer Lancaster? She is a non-fction comedy writer- hysterical- her first book is called "Bitter is the New Black"... she has 4 or 5 books out now- I can't rememebr which one- I think it is Bitter- but she talks about going to Weight Watchers and listeneing to them blame all thier weight problems on office birthday cake- all of her books deal with her weight struggles- very very funny- (and takes place in Chicago).
But I do agree with you- some people just don;t get that you are not ina good place for you- while you may not seem overweight to them, it is about how you feel- AND some people feel better about thier weight/eating issues when other are in the same boat you are- don't let them drag you down to thier level so that they can feel justified for thier own situation!
Hang in there!!!0 -
No one is forcing you though. You still make all your own decisions. If you want it bad enough you will continue to say no. Or fit the bagel in your daily calorie allowance
No, but when they continuously try to get me to take a bagel, it gets harder and harder to say no. What I am saying is, they should respect me and what I am doing enough to let it go. If they ask and I say no, that should be the end of it. And it isn't about how many calories right now, it's about what kind of calories
I completely agree with you there, they really do mean well though. All you can do is continue to say no unfortunately. Sounds exactly like everyone in my family!
It really is about how many calories by the way. You can eat "dirty" foods and still continue to lose weight.0 -
I only have about 10-15 more lbs to lose, but I really don't look like it. I'm more concerned about losing the fat and toning up. I know right now is crucial to eating right and not going overboard with the wrong types of foods. I am trying very hard to eat what kind of food I need to in order to get the muscle and lose the fat. Of course my office ALWAYS has some type of food sitting around for everybody. Today it's Panera Bread's bagels. I am so in love with Panera Bread, but I am doing good and saying no. My supervisor won't let it go. It's so aggravating. He keeps telling me "there's low fat cream cheese" "one bagel isn't going to hurt" and all this other crap. Seriously please stop I don't want a damn bagel. But that's how it always starts. I am always good at saying no at first, then somebody comes along with their persuasiveness and I eventually cave because they won't stop talking about it and it's all I think about. Then after one bad thing during the day it leads me to another. Why can't people just respect that I want to do this for myself? Just because YOU don't think I need to lose any weight doesn't mean I'm happy with where I am right now!
Well, I am a carb lover and so I say, one bagel won't hurt you. But the there is no such thing as low fat cream cheese. Just don't go over on the calories when it comes to bread, and maybe a whole wheat bagel? Unless you are an low carb dieter, just watch the sodium for the rest of your day.0 -
You could just tell him you don't feel well and you don't think a bagel will sit well.0
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Because they just don't get it. It takes hard work and perseverance (at least for some, like myself) to get to have the body we want. For them it's easy to say "Oh, come on! Take just one bite!" But in my case as well, one bite leads to another, etc Better to not touch it.0
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Have you mentioned anything to your boss or the people you work with? From how it sounds, it seems like maybe your boss just feels bad that you're not eating anything with them (kind of leaving you out). Next time, just tell him No, Thanks, You appreciate it. And then mention how great you're doing, what your goal is, and that him offering the food like that makes it even harder for you. Maybe ask him to pick up some fruit next time he brings in breakfast?
I had a co-worker that did that kind of stuff on purpose, to try and get me to cave in and eat stuff I shouldn't. She put a box of cookies on my desk once, so I "accidentally" slammed my chair into her. ;-)
First off, I LOVE your name! And I've tried to explain to them. Before it wasn't so bad because I was getting married, but this month after being married has been bad because they say "Oh you're married what are you trying to look good for". Really? So now that I'm married I don't have to care about myself anymore? I sometimes just take the food and stick it in my lunch sack and bring it home for my hubby. He can eat all day and not gain a lb, the jerk lol0 -
I know what your saying about pressure from others to eat... It drives me crazy. I work in a busy maternity unit on labour ward so we ofter get chocs and cakes given plus all the midwives bring other tasty stuff in. If you dont eat it they are constantly at you. Im not really a sweet person anyway.
My other constant pain is my best friend who Im sure is determind to see me fall off the wagon and eat everything in site. She did it today after we went to the farm with her daughter. Stopping at mcdonalds and actually being stroppy when I didnt order anything apart from a drink. I have lost over 2st now and Im starting to see a real difference. I feel so much better. Why dont they get that im trying bloody hard and sod off. I love my best pal dearly and she is over weight and unhappy with it but very lazy and apparently on a diet 'yeah right' haha. I would be there to help her every second of every day but I guess I know better than anyone you got to want to do it. You got to give it some welly!! lol.
Good luck and stay focused :O)0 -
My mom and I have both been using MFP for over a month now and it's funny (and sometimes frustrating) to hear the things my husband and dad say. They are both supportive, don't get me wrong, but it can be hard to have goals that differ from those around you.
My husband said to me the other day, "You are doing great, but I just wanted to say that since you started changing your portion size, mine have been getting smaller, too, and I don't want smaller portions." lol.
Today, I asked him if he could drop me off at the store on his way out and that I would walk back. He is just baffled by this. "Why would you want to walk back?" he says. For the exercise - it's only 3 miles. ".... ok...."
My poor mom has to deal with my Dad's special food requests for his bday - chocolate chip cookies, chocolate cake, out to dinner, etc.
But so is life, and we choose what to make of it, despite what others understand, or don't understand for that matter.
Hang in there!0 -
jealousy
I totally agree! The willpower to eat right is so hard, and until a person has the strength to actually do it, they want everyone to eat as bad as they do. It's a pride thing. My office is the same way. They think that because I workout 6 days a week that I can eat whatever I want...don't I wish!!!! And so many people think that just because you don't eat 2000 calories a day, you are starving yourself!!! So not true!
Hang in there! You have support here! And keep reminding yourself that you are doing what is right for YOU!!!
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Have you ever read any of the books by Jennifer Lancaster? She is a non-fction comedy writer- hysterical- her first book is called "Bitter is the New Black"... she has 4 or 5 books out now- I can't rememebr which one- I think it is Bitter- but she talks about going to Weight Watchers and listeneing to them blame all thier weight problems on office birthday cake- all of her books deal with her weight struggles- very very funny- (and takes place in Chicago).
But I do agree with you- some people just don;t get that you are not ina good place for you- while you may not seem overweight to them, it is about how you feel- AND some people feel better about thier weight/eating issues when other are in the same boat you are- don't let them drag you down to thier level so that they can feel justified for thier own situation!
Hang in there!!!
I haven't but I am definitely going to check it out, I love to read!!0 -
I have the same problem here! I keep a few pieces of fresh fruit in a bowl on my desk, a stash of healthy snacks in my desk drawer, and a couple less healthy but "better than a bagel" snacks in my desk as well, like an energy bar with chocolate on it. I also keep a supply of Greek yogurts in the fridge at work. You just gotta be prepared! But there's probably others in your office that feel the same way. Seek them out and stick together!
Good luck!0 -
personally I would go for the note on the forehead I would try one of those bright color sticky notes! 0
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Keep your eyes on the prize!!!0
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No one is forcing you though. You still make all your own decisions. If you want it bad enough you will continue to say no. Or fit the bagel in your daily calorie allowance
No, but when they continuously try to get me to take a bagel, it gets harder and harder to say no. What I am saying is, they should respect me and what I am doing enough to let it go. If they ask and I say no, that should be the end of it. And it isn't about how many calories right now, it's about what kind of calories
I agree pressure does make you give in. I have jumped that hurdle now and Im not so easily swayed but its sooooo annoying all the same. If you can just say no lady and thats it your sooooo lucky. You obvoiously dont work with the hen peckers I work with haha. They are completely ruthless :O) Your sooo right about this post people should just gorge thereselves and leave other motivated folk alone :O)0 -
My usual trick is just to say that I'm going to "take one for later." I wrap it in a napkin, stick it in my purse and take it home and give it to my 22 year old son who can afford to eat it. :laugh:0
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How about putting a huge note on your desk (or your forehead for emphasis) that says "I DON'T WANT A DAMN BAGEL!"
Hmmmm I like this idea... Maybe I'll change the signature on my e-mails to say something to this effect
lol! Love this xD0
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