Lost all my friends

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2

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  • kater8er
    kater8er Posts: 364 Member
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    It's one thing if you say "hey all! taking a break!" but quite another if you just vanish without warning. Life and MFP goes on w/o you!
  • dirtbikegirl5
    dirtbikegirl5 Posts: 391 Member
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    As you know, people are on MFP to give and get support. If you are not on here for a period of time, then you are not working the site like you should.
    I would not take it personally and search out some new friends.
  • BigDaddyBRC
    BigDaddyBRC Posts: 2,395 Member
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    Hello! Well here is my story- I had to take a break from MFP for a couple months because I was getting a little carried with it and the scale was running my life. Long story short, I came back, and pretty much everyone had defriended me! Personally, I think that's rude! Is this a common thing? To lose your friends if you don't log on every single day?

    If you took a break for Months, AND did not say anything about it...I drop you like a rock in water. Additionally, if they wronte on your wall, which generates an email to you, asking where you went, and you dont respond....CYA

    It's called respect. Show it, and you get it. Dont and you wont.

    Welcome back. And I hope you succeed with your journey
  • hbrittingham
    hbrittingham Posts: 2,518 Member
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    I don't have the time or energy to look at my friends' list and see whether the folks there are active or not. I sure wouldn't delete someone for not being active. I have, however, deleted friends who never, ever post a supportive word or two on my progress. I comment on theirs, but they can't comment on mine? Sorry, I don't consider that a friend.
  • Debbe2
    Debbe2 Posts: 2,071 Member
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    Not rude, sorry. Friends are people who you interact with and depend on. Usually in person but for MFP it's online but still depends on a relationship which goes two ways.

    Welcome back and good luck!
  • HeelsAndBoxingGloves
    HeelsAndBoxingGloves Posts: 916 Member
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    It depends for me. If there is someone on my friend list that I don't know well that hadn't logged in for months, then I would delete. If it is someone I interact with regularly and like, I would keep for much longer hoping they come back.


    ^^ THIS. I have a core group I would keep around, regardless, but would send encouraging messages. I have done that, in fact and when they were ready, they sent me a PM to let me know what was going on, so I kept them.

    Both of these!! BUT welcome back to the site, and I hope you stick around this time!! I'm sure you'll make lots of new great friends this time around :happy: :flowerforyou:
  • kennethmgreen
    kennethmgreen Posts: 1,759 Member
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    I'd be willing to bet if you looked up your friends again and added them, they would be glad to see you back.

    I don't know why MFP friend deletions are such a big deal. The only time it matters is when I am deleting you while sobbing and/or screaming profanities at the computer. Then it's a big deal. And I click the delete button really, really hard.
  • classycouture
    classycouture Posts: 888 Member
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    I'm sorry to hear about you being defriended, and although it must be upsetting, at least you took care of yourself. The scale can end up running your life, and I'm just glad you noticed it was time to take a break when you did. Here's to new beginnings and a new support system!
  • kaitimae
    kaitimae Posts: 727 Member
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    I usually delete people after they do not log on for 3 months.

    There is only a limited number of friends you can have on MFP so if someone is not logging on, what is the point in having them take up the "friend space"?

    3 months is about my limit too. Anyone who hasn't logged on in that long I unfriend, unless they are a close real life friend or family member.
  • dad106
    dad106 Posts: 4,868 Member
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    You get a month in my book.. and then it's adios.

    I figure that I'm pretty active on the message boards and what not, so that if someone really wants to be my friend, then they'll find a way to find me and re-add me.
  • Hourglass25
    Hourglass25 Posts: 340 Member
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    I do delete people who havent logged in a while or who dont show support. I mean whats the point of having pals if they never log in or dont give you words of encouragement, feedback, tips, etc?...

    I also feel this way, unless I know that they are on a break for whatever reason
  • KateHubb
    KateHubb Posts: 366 Member
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    I do a friend sweep once a week and delete everyone who has gone over 10 days without logging in. It's nothing personal, I just choose to only keep friends that are active on the site and serious about losing weight. There have been times where someone will post a status saying they are going out of the country, taking a break, etc and if I know what's going on, I won't cut them. It's just something I do to keep my list manageable.
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
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    It happens. I have some friends I would never, ever delete. But I would be concerned if they stopped logging in. Others, if they didn't tell me they might not be around so much, I'll delete. I try to keep track of all my friends. I have a Q system...
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    Definitely not rude. You can delete someone whenever you like, actually, and there's nothing rude about it.
  • ilookthetype
    ilookthetype Posts: 3,021 Member
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    It happens. I have some friends I would never, ever delete. But I would be concerned if they stopped logging in. Others, if they didn't tell me they might not be around so much, I'll delete. I try to keep track of all my friends. I have a Q system...

    I second all of this. Except for the last bit, I don't have a Q system.
  • WillieEverlearn
    WillieEverlearn Posts: 87 Member
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    I'm even more brutal. If I get the "so-and-so hasn't logged on for three days" message, my finger is hovering over the delete button. I want a friend list of people who are active in every sense of the word: getting in workouts, logging their calories, updating their successes (and struggles), and so on.

    There's another place where I can keep up with a group of friends who sign on every couple of months. It's called Facebook.
  • kmbrooks15
    kmbrooks15 Posts: 941 Member
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    I defriend people who haven't logged in for more than about 30 days. If they tell me ahead they are taking a break, though, I'll leave them there until they come back.

    You can feel free to friend me if you want. I won't defriend you if you leave if you just warn me! LOL
  • Shash27
    Shash27 Posts: 172
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    I usually delete people after they do not log on for 3 months.

    There is only a limited number of friends you can have on MFP so if someone is not logging on, what is the point in having them take up the "friend space"?

    3 months is about my limit too. Anyone who hasn't logged on in that long I unfriend, unless they are a close real life friend or family member.

    I delete after 1 month unless they said something prior. Even my close friends are subject to this rule. I want to support people who are serious and a month with no log ins shows me they are not...
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    I delete anyone who hasn't logged in for more than a month that I don't know irl unless they say something beforehand, and anyone whose posts annoy me. Yeah, that second part may sound ****ty, but if one of my mfp's perpetually TYPES IN ALL CAPS they're cut . . . in my head when I see that I FEEL AS THOUGH THEY'RE YELLING and I have a 2 year old so I get all the yelling at me that I need.
  • jam3114
    jam3114 Posts: 250 Member
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    To be honest I'm surprised I've got any friends left because I'm not that consistent so sometimes I'm logging in expecting to have no friends.

    On the other hand I have a number of friends who haven't logged in weeks, some even months but it doesn't bother me so they just stay there in the hope that they come back.

    If you need a friend just send a request :smile:

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