Need advice - What would you do?

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  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    Walk away. She won't believe you, anyway.


    As I've said before, its not a case of not believeing me. I have proof. I have emails and texts that go waaay back to when we first met.
    If she doesn't believe me then its because she's in denial, because the proof is there.

    I guarantee she's in denial. Do you think you're the first he's done this with? There's no way she's lived with him and been with him this long and doesn't know.
  • BHAK
    BHAK Posts: 33
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    She will find out some other way...run away from this situation....run the outcomes in your head....what good does it do you to tell her??? She could get mad at you....he could get mad at you...I don't see this being a good outcome for you in any way...get yourself away and STAY AWAY!!!! Even if he comes back and says its over and he wants you back...STAY AWAY!!!!!!!!!!
  • lh12xx
    lh12xx Posts: 111 Member
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    now buck up stop being a little high school girl

    for one you really do need to get looked at i would say mentally

    I hope your judgement in life gets better hun i really do


    I asked for advice, not a slating. Easy with the nasty comments - I'm not in a nice position and just thought I'd ask what others would do before I made any decisions.
    Please stop patronising me like I'm a little girl, I'm 22 and I have perfectly sound judgement and a sound mental state, thank you very much.
    If I told her, I wouldn't have been spiteful towards her because its not her fault. I've been in her position before, and as much as it hurt to hear, I was grateful that the other girl told me.

    I don't think I'm going to tell her. And I even feel bad about that. But should I ever bump in to her, I will tell her. Chances of me ever bumping in to her are very slim, though.

    Thank you for your help, everyone.
  • cramernh
    cramernh Posts: 3,335 Member
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    now buck up stop being a little high school girl

    for one you really do need to get looked at i would say mentally

    I hope your judgement in life gets better hun i really do


    I asked for advice, not a slating. Easy with the nasty comments - I'm not in a nice position and just thought I'd ask what others would do before I made any decisions.
    Please stop patronising me like I'm a little girl, I'm 22 and I have perfectly sound judgement and a sound mental state, thank you very much.
    If I told her, I wouldn't have been spiteful towards her because its not her fault. I've been in her position before, and as much as it hurt to hear, I was grateful that the other girl told me.

    I don't think I'm going to tell her. And I even feel bad about that. But should I ever bump in to her, I will tell her. Chances of me ever bumping in to her are very slim, though.

    Thank you for your help, everyone.


    My original reply on "getting checked out" was a genuine post. If he is cheating on his wife with you, and goodness knows who else, you definitely want to make sure you havent contracted anything from him....

    My first husband admitted he had an affair while away from home - I couldnt get to my doctor's office fast enough for testing....
  • mainscott
    mainscott Posts: 36 Member
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    THE GUYS WILL HATE ME FOR THIS BUT TELL HIM AND HER THAT YOUWERE DIAGNOSED WITH A V.D. AND THAT THEY BOTH MIGHT WANT TO GET CHECKED OUT. THAT SHOULD ACCOMPLISH EVERYTHING THAT YOU WANT TO. SCOTT
  • dragonbait0126
    dragonbait0126 Posts: 568 Member
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    If you tell her you're only going to hurt the one person in all of this who doesn't deserve to be hurt. Unlike you and her cousin she's done nothing wrong. Perhaps she deserves to know, but she doesn't deserve to hear it from you and you wouldn't be telling her for her benefit, you'd be telling her for your benefit. Walk away and chalk it up to experience and don't screw around with guys who are only looking to have their cake and eat it.

    ^^^This. Or go on Jerry Springer because this whole situation would be perfect for that show. In all seriousness, you've already said that if you told her it would only be out of spite for him and she doesn't deserve that. Does she deserve to know? Yes. Does she deserve to be used as a form of revenge? No.
  • foxygirlact
    foxygirlact Posts: 98 Member
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    walk away.

    the fact that you are asking whether this is ok, shows that deep down you know it isn't ok, but you want someone to say "sure, go ahead".

    you say you want to do this out of spite.

    All you will achieve is hurting another woman, when the man is the one who deserves the hurt and you won't feel like you achieved anything

    I know it is horrible when someone betrays you, but lashing out at her is not the answer
  • grobbygru
    grobbygru Posts: 295 Member
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    I just have one question - where are these nice men to find some of you talk about??
  • TheBraveryLover
    TheBraveryLover Posts: 1,217 Member
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    I don't think it's your place to tell her. But, wow, he's sounds like a real charmer! :noway:
  • Dawnealice
    Dawnealice Posts: 4 Member
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    I wouldnt just walk away I would run... and cut all ties, delete him from FB (better yet block him from FB) delete his number and everything so you arent tempted to go back...

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