Why does my boyfriend make me so mad?

Sometimes the Other Half just doesn't get it and you actually have to SAY that to them.. not hint but outright say.

Maybe that wasnt the answer you were looking for but unless you actually tell him what you want and expect from him what else can he do than reassure you he isnt put off by the weight gain in a jovial manner.

We are men, most of us wont get the sublte hints or slight suggestions. If you drew it out for us in orange crayon it would still be a struggle for some. Ask him directly for support and what you mean by support, if he refuses or shows no interest, then get mad.

my 2p.

ANYTHING we say usually lands us in hot water. "your not sensitive enough", or "You didnt have to be so rude". There is no common ground. : )

The only thing i would say is you ask him to do a joint workout. He is not psycic and will not know that was what you wanted from him. Most men need to be told direct what you want or you will spend forever in a frustrated mood and life is too short. Tell him what you want from him and then see what his response is. Ask if you can go to the gym with him maybe.

Men don't read minds. They also don't pick up on dropped hints. You may think you're being very clear but he won't see it.

Years ago when DH and I were first married we worked opposite shifts. I dropped a few hints that I thought were perfectly clear that I wanted to get a cat. He wasn't an animal person growing up so I went the "dropping hints" route. Finally after a few weeks of dropping what I thought were perfectly clear hints I came out and asked "Can I get a kitty?" He said "OK, sure." I was floored that he agreed so easily. I told him I'd been dropping hints for weeks because I didn't think he'd go for it. 17 years later and we still joke about it.

Tell him exactly what you want (words of two syllables or less may help), also, when he says something to you that can be interpreted as good or bad ALWAYS take it the good way because men don't do subtle or hints.

He is male!!! lol But you do need support while you are battling the cravings of fast food and soda pop so I guess it is a great thing you joined here! I am single for over a year now and with work and school my schedules I cant find a workout partner so this website is the closest thing I have. Good luck:happy:

My boyfriend has always said he will support me through my weight loss efforts. However he can be so matter of fact with it all which just upsets me.

He just goes 'well just eat less and exercise more' which I know is obv how it works but its the way he says it as if I am stupid. For someone like myself who has had a bad relationship with food all my life to the point of binge eating, it isnt that easy

So I made a pact with him that I will do it on my own and not mention my weight loss efforts to him unless he asks and in return he will stop with the sarky comments which dont help.

My boyfriend is a lovely guy. But he is a guy and things dont always come out the way he means them lol!

I....I just don't understand this. It's like it's this unwritten rule that all men are these babbling and socially awkward creatures that don't know how to words things correctly.

Is this a prominent attribute that most men have or have I completely missed something? o_O

Ok I apologise for including all men in this. In my experience the men I know say things and they never mean it the way it sounds. I just meant it that men are more matter of fact than women so it can come across the wrong way sometimes.

I'm not overweight (trying to gain weight) but I am a bloke and I am engaged to someone who is trying to lose weight. I was told in no uncertain terms that I'm not as supportive as I could be this morning as it happens. That hurt a lot to be honest as although I dont show it in the ways my fiancee wants me to, I show it in lots of other ways (DIY, housework, flowers, gifts, giogn to bed at the same time, laying a fire).

Thing is, as has been said, we're not mind readers. We can also become comfortable with the status quo and imagine that you're content too. Things like your other half wanting to change how they are can upset your view of how the world is. One minute you think your partner is happy with themself and you, the next you discover they think they are overweight and (in this case) they probably think you are too.

Doesnt take a genius to realise that if you keep to your diet and gym routine then your boyfriend will realise that he is now potentially a bit of a fat slob in yours or other peoples eyes and that he will need to do something about it. If he doesnt then you will quite possibly get sick of him or you will think less of him for not wanting to change. So, from his perspective, the woman he was happy being with is on her way to changing herself... and who knows what it will mean for his future.

I know men tend to be much more matter of fact and less sensitive and we also tend to "problem solve" rather than empathising. I've got to work on that... but then contrairywise, my fiancee also needs to work on seeing thigns from a male perspective and understand that because I dont say gushing stuff it isnt because I dotn care, its because I'm a man and we dont "tend" to work like that.

Anyway, rambling now. Best shut up and eat something.

People have to lose weight for their own reason - you have to hit your own rock bottom for something to change. You've hit yours, and he hasn't yet. When he does, he will be there right with you!!

I can't believe I'm going to say this but...... MEN GET A BAD RAP! Wow my fingers tingle a little after typing that.

We women expect them to know how we want them to respond and then get upset when we don't get the response we were looking for. I have done it myself. The sad part is, most of the time they they are being sincere and have no clue they have upset us. I realize there are exceptions to this, and some men are perfect and some are idiots.... But on average this is the case.

A couple things I have learned as I have aged...... First, I don't look for others to fix my insecurities. At the end of the day it's how I feel that's important. And second, If I do need something, I try not to drop hints, I try to be more direct so I get the result I'm looking for. It's all about good communication.... On both parts.

I agree completely. There are some jerks in the world, but I find that men in general are incredibly easy to get along with. All you have to do is be honest about what you need, want, and expect from them. If you give a man an objective, he will try like hell to achieve it. It's what they do.