Does You Spouse Motivate Or Complicate Your Weight Loss?

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  • Kamalka
    Kamalka Posts: 164 Member
    Both as well: she is motivating as I just have to copy her fod intake but unfortunately she does not like slim men, so she sometimes try to increase my calories. The worse are actually fruits, she eat 10 of them every day and my carbs and sugar are therefore always too high
  • elenathegreat
    elenathegreat Posts: 3,988 Member
    I guess I take it for granted. Hubby and all three of my children (all boys) are 100% supportive. No crap in the house. Often someone to workout with me and lots of high fives. They are really proud. They are all thin. I'm the only heavy one in the house. It everyone wants to eat out but I don't have many calories left or much sodium left, then we don't eat out or we find a healthy alternative. Now we all go for frozen yogurt or whatever. They still have more treats than I do, but seriously, I've got it good.

    What a bunch of sweethearts!! You are a blessed woman:)
  • bonnt
    bonnt Posts: 171 Member
    Both, although he's more of a hinderance. He's really supportive in that he congratulates me, treats me when I reach a goal, and sometimes watches our daughter so I can go downstairs and use the treadmill. However, when I talk about needing/wanting to get more exercise in, he says just for one day that I should take a break (I DO have rest days, which are usually days I spend 100% with him!). If we go out to eat, he gets annoyed that I try to look in advance to figure out what to eat, or if I make any changes to my meal to make it lower calorie. He eats all this crap food around me, and even asks that I make him cookies, rice krispies treats, etc. I don't mind making things for him, but it's really hard for me to have it in the house.
  • Faye_Anderson
    Faye_Anderson Posts: 1,495 Member
    both. he is supportive in the sense that he's sensitive to what i want to eat, encourages me to take walks with him and stuff...but then can eat like a giant bowl of spaghetti and not gain a pound. or, he'll want to make a cake or cupcakes or something, and i just can't have that stuff around!

    Pretty much this :grumble: :laugh:
  • Blacklance36
    Blacklance36 Posts: 755 Member
    I get zero support from my wife. If I talk about my goals or progress she ignores me. She snacks every night and is overweight but doesnt seem to care.
    Its frustrating, as I work daily at losing weight and toning, like most people on MFP. Im at the gym 4 times a week and encourage her to come but she has never done so. All in all she complicates my weight loss.
  • marasw
    marasw Posts: 75 Member
    Neither. He really doesn't have any effect on my weight loss one way or the other. He is, however, very patient with me when I absolutely cannot be satisfied. If he offers me a cookie I get mad. If I want a cookie and he says "Are you sure you want it?" I get mad. If he eats a cookie I get mad. There is no pleasing me. Thankfully he puts up with it.
  • macylane4
    macylane4 Posts: 224
    We have been working on losing weight together. He hit the 80lbs mark and has stopped...he has no more to lose! I still have a lot to lose, so now he is maintaining, and I'm still trying to lose...it get difficult, but we just stopped eating together for the most part! As for him motivating me or helping me...not so much. I think it might make him jealous when people compliment me? Either way I've decided to dot his for me, and i don't care what people around me are doing...I've made up my mind, and following through!!!!
  • I guess I am the only one who has a completely NON supportive husband. That is why I joined MFP. I have found many freinds on here to give me the support I need because I know I will not get it from him. I cannot wait for the day I am to my goal weight with a smoking hot body, then maybe he will actually be supportive OR at least acknowledge that I was successful this time. AND that I did it without his support and help.

    I'm right there with ya hun!! My hubby always tells me "I don't see why you have to do this you look great the way you are" There lies the problem I don't wanna look great anymore, da**it I wanna be smokin like the way I have seen him check other women out...lol

    Therefore I don't tell him anything about how much I have lost or how many inches are gone I figure he'll figure it out one day :)
  • Bentley2718
    Bentley2718 Posts: 1,689 Member
    I am very lucky, my husband is super supportive. He loves me and finds me attractive at any weight (although he has admitted her prefers me with some extra meat on my bones). At the same time, he is supportive of me wanting to lose weight, because it makes me happy. He also has his own fitness goals (which involve being fit, but not worrying about weight, since that has never been a problem for him at all), and is a great gym buddy. He is mostly very good about not having certain foods in the house, and happily eats almost everything I cook. There are two down sides, one is that he can eat whatever he wants and not gain weight, so it's easy for me to forget that I can't. The other is that I have to make sure there are plenty of whole grains for him to eat, since he has a very high metabolism and will be too hungry otherwise, if it was just me, I'd skip the grains entirely a lot of the time. Overall, I am exceptionally lucky to be with someone who is so supportive
  • He is super supportive. My hubs is very athletic and has always been in shape. His job demands elite athletes so he has no choice but to keep up. I don't think he'd ever give up working out even if his job didn't hold him accountable.

    He always encourages me to go run with him, lift weights, go hiking, etc.

    Sometimes we do butt heads in the kitchen. He doesn't eat terribly but he doesn't understand my need to count/measure/weigh everything I consume. He loves to cook so this becomes a chore to him.

    I try to come half way and do the measuring for him in his prep. We love to cook together so this becomes quality time together.

    My husband can eat tons of food and not gain a pound. I can look at a bagel and gain 10 pounds. He has a hard time understanding that I need to account for everything that goes in my mouth in order to achieve weight loss. With him, he can just eat healthy foods and eye the portions and lose weight/maintain. He's got my dream metabolism.

    But in all, he is super supportive and if I just meet him halfway in the kitchen, we're both happy campers! I'm a really lucky girl :)
  • Sixalicious
    Sixalicious Posts: 283 Member
    My husbnd is great when it comes to getting me to move around when I'm trying to skip a day. Like, last week, I didn't go to my other gym for Body Pump so we went to our original gym that evening. As much as I didn't want to do weights, he convinced me to at least do the circuit with him. I really appreciated it. However, when it comes to the kitchen...grrrrrr. He likes to bake pies with the sweet potatoes I buy for my lunch and marinade the chicken. Noooooo!!!! I need him to stop cooking like that because I get weak for the foods he cooks. Sometimes, I think he is afraid of me losing too much weight so he cooks to keep me fat. lol
  • aippolito1
    aippolito1 Posts: 4,894 Member
    He's in the middle. He's more supportive now than when I first started. When I first started running in the mornings in the summer of '10, he would get annoyed and hug me tight to keep me from getting out of bed. Now, when I get out of bed to work out, he just rolls over and says "okay". lol He still buys his junk food (but eats it so fast, that it's not a problem for me - and sometimes I'll eat a couple chips but I can keep my hand out of the bag better than a couple years ago when I first gained the weight).

    If we eat out or order in and I agree to something, he'll ask if I'm sure, and usually he's good when I say no, that he can order, and I'll cook my dinner, or ask for a place where I can have a healthier option.

    He doesn't work out, but sometimes he'll suggest we take the dog for a walk - granted, a walk to him is 5 minutes; a walk to me is 30-45! lol
  • CrazyAdventure
    CrazyAdventure Posts: 113 Member
    My husband has been great lately, once he started in on the mission. Before he would push for things like pizza and chipotle (mmm Chipotle...), but now he realizes how hard it is to lose weight with those types of things around. He was never unsupportive on purpose by any means. It is still hard to watch him be able to eat double what I do because he of course needs more calories.

    Now he works out and encourages me to work out. It's almost a competition because we have money jars that we add to every time we work out (just $1 per workout) and we tease when one of us is up by a dollar or two.

    Anyway, great topic and it's been nice to read others' journeys with their SOs.
  • SweetProgression
    SweetProgression Posts: 65 Member
    he complicates... See he'll bring yogurt one week and cupcakes the next... I wanna scream lll
  • total saboteur.
  • I have been with my boyfriend for 10 years. He complicates....he is 6'4" and 320 pounds whereas I am 5'3" and about 115 pounds. Every time I try to eat better he tries to play the guilt trip on me and says, "But I don't want you to lose your curves!". He eats enough for 3 people to say the least.......
  • Cris725
    Cris725 Posts: 81
    Thats easy to answer. He complicates things. He loves anything with sugar in it. Candy, brownies, ice cream......Its an issue. And even though he's drinking more water, he wont stop with the soda. Luckily I havent been craving it. Though the other day I got upset with him because we went to the store and he asked me if I wanted a soda. I asked him why he would ask me that. I havent had any soda in nearly a month!
  • samntha14
    samntha14 Posts: 2,084 Member
    He used to be a hindrance. He had a very negative approach to motivation that just made me feel bad. Now, he is nothing but encouraging. the more seriously I take it, the more seriously he takes it. He even bought a polar HRM to use at the gym. He kicks me out of the house to go to the gym. It's a good thing because I'll procrastinate or find something to do. I have to say it's a lot easier with his encouragement than without it.
  • raevynn
    raevynn Posts: 666 Member
    My Dear Hubby, JavaJunki, is also on MFP -

    He is the best friend and support I've ever had.

    He gets up in the morning, makes my breakfast smoothie, packs my lunch, and encourages me to drink water.

    We exercise together often.

    He weighs my foods and calls out the grams while I'm posting them to my diary.

    He tells me I'm beautiful, all the time.

    He's lost ... um, 30+ lbs already, too.

    He's a great friend! :flowerforyou:
  • jlong7774
    jlong7774 Posts: 64 Member
    My wife has been very supportive in MFP. She understands what MFP is doing to help me lose weight. She encourages me to use my phone when entering my phone diary at a restaurant. Recently she got an iPhone for Christmas since her phone was on it's last leg and we got the iPhone so she could use MFP.
  • bmmadden
    bmmadden Posts: 499 Member
    My husband is very supportive in the complimenting me and it seems he desires me a little more than when I was 70 lbs more and he understands when I make things for me and not the rest of the family, however like many of the others he does require his snacks, the good thing he keeps them in his man cave room as he calls it so they are out of my sight. When I make some meals he also dont mind if I replace things with like ground turkey or whole wheat pasta so he is supportive in that area as well, so he is great and reaping benefits from my weight loss as well
  • McMeggers
    McMeggers Posts: 22 Member
    :cry: i hate to say it but my boyfriend is a bit of hindrance we are on the oppisate ends of the diet /weight scale he is 5'11 146 lbs and he has the metabolism that we would pretty much all kill for. He is supportive of my weight loss he will tell me good job, occasiaonaly i can drag him to the gym and he will lift weights while i do my cardio. the issue is when i ask him to help me by not eating bad food he says " youre the one trying to lose wight not me " and all he eats is burgerking, hot dogs, pizza , cake etc and he dosent gain an inch! its maddening his whole family is like that im the fat girl in a sea of people with perfect bodies. It gives my already six feet under self esteem another kick
  • aa1440
    aa1440 Posts: 956 Member
    My wife and I took this journey together. We both lost a large amount of weight.
  • Victoriav99
    Victoriav99 Posts: 260 Member
    I would say he is supportive. If we have something that is not so healthy I'll eat half of it and give the rest to him so it doesn't tempt me. He's lucky enough to be thin and not worry too much about weight gain. He always tells me how much hotter I am and I've only lost 10 lbs. .
  • lookpretty
    lookpretty Posts: 276 Member
    He is good at keeping me moderate, we are seperated right now but when he was local it was the same way, since we would eat one meal a day together and sometimes not even that the majority of my diet was out of sight, but if we are eating together he doesnt want to hear a word about a diet, we mostly eat out together so it would shock him if I ordered something obviously unhealthy of a side like mac n cheese, but if he takes me to a burger joint Ill get a burger, if we go for pizza Ill get a pizza,sometimes if Im a but untsable a salad, but if I eat more of a portion than I should he usually will point out to me in that gentle way he does that if I eat anymore I will feel guilty later and its best if I dont. And hes so right, there is a certain amount of calories im ok consuming and after that I feel terribly guilty and will skip a few meals to make up for it. Its different losing weight being legitimitly over weight after having struggled with anorexia, I think he approves of me losing about 20 more pounds but not much more than that, he would be unhappy if I gained weight for sure, but he is also ok with me being at this weight forever, hes no ok with me acting strangely to lose weight or over eating in a glutiny sort of way. He always points out if hes noticed Ive lsot weight or if a part of me is firmer, but he has never called me fat, hes commented that my tummy is rounded, which it is, but again it was in a loving way, his belly is rounded and hes very thin. When i eat I look pregnant, it gets all swollen and rounded.

    Id say hes good for my sanity over all and good for a gradual loss
  • Mom0fTwo
    Mom0fTwo Posts: 326 Member
    I guess I am the only one who has a completely NON supportive husband. That is why I joined MFP. I have found many freinds on here to give me the support I need because I know I will not get it from him. I cannot wait for the day I am to my goal weight with a smoking hot body, then maybe he will actually be supportive OR at least acknowledge that I was successful this time. AND that I did it without his support and help.

    I hear ya, i loathe being fat it makes me depressed, but he doesn't realize that my weight is causing it, plus he is like 5'7" and 200 lbs and thinks he is fine, he constantly wants to eat out and i have no will power so i cave some times as long as he doesn't mention eating out or putting the idea in my head then i am fine but once it is there it nags. This year he said his resolution, but yesterday he told me that when i mention the word "calories" he stops listening... so much for that resolution
  • well my partner is quite supportive. he love doing his weights etc and i join him doing excersise. i wouldnt do as much as i do without him. but then sometimes its hard, because he (like all of us) likes chocolate cakes etc and so do my sons. i find that if i bake cakes just after my lunch im not tempted to have any of them. :flowerforyou:
  • knapowell
    knapowell Posts: 230 Member
    I'm lucky to have the most supportive husband. We own our own business, so he works very long irregular hours sometimes, but he makes every effort to be home to watch the kids so I can go to the gym. He doesn't complain about the changes I have made in our meals. I could go on and on...
  • Micheller1210
    Micheller1210 Posts: 460 Member
    I have a wonderful husband, on one hand he supports me cheers me on, but he will say things like you can lose all the weight you want but don't lose your booty.....and wants fried potatoes for sausage and eggs for breakfast. sometime i have the will power to not eat it other times i have a bite of each and then im satisfied.
  • yuckidah
    yuckidah Posts: 290 Member
    Mine is fantastic. He listens to me moan & whinge.
    He does think though that I'm fine as I am and that everyone should eat & enjoy life rather than diet & be miserable, however he understands that I'm not happy like this and does everything I need him to to help me get where I want to be.
    I would not be out exercising (for the first time in almost forever) without him coming along for the ride (literally) - I find it far easier (& less embarrassing) with company.
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