Does You Spouse Motivate Or Complicate Your Weight Loss?

My situation is different because my husand works away from home for 3 weeks & then is home for a week. When he is here, he really helps by preparing meals and checking the nutrition info for me. He is very supportive! HOWEVER, when he leaves for work (like he did this morning) I self-destruct.:sad: I'm an emotional eater. I need to overcome & control MY sadness & anxiety when he's gone so I dont set myself back with my goals! Its frustrating but at least I know where my struggles are, I just need to be able to re-route my emotions in a positive direction~Like at the gym

I'm in a similar situation as I have reconnected with the father of my children (my "X"), but he lives out of town. I'm actually quite good when with him, and he is VERY supportive (he also does NOT have a weight problem... grrr!), but lately I've been self-destructing as soon as I get back home and am by myself in the house. I'm working on this issue. It is definitely an emotional thing.

Motivating... but not in a good way.

We have had so many arguements in the past, over his eating habits and choices, and as i predicted/warned him, sure enough he developed type 2 diabetes a few years ago. Doing so should have finally gotten through to him that he needed to take control of his own food choices, (since he also has high blood pressure, bad knees, sore feet, kidney stones every 6 months, acid reflux, blocked arteries/stent put in, etc etc.. all the weight related issues you can think of).
Did it? nope... he still eats badly for the most part.. and yes, he influenced me to start eating badly again back when he and i first met 12 years ago, (at that time i was doing well eating healthy and losing weight).

So.. i simply got tired of the arguements about what he was eating *L*... and basically told him he could commit suicide with food if he wanted, but i was no longer going to let his choices influence mine anymore.. yes indeed, i finally took responsibiliy for myself again, despite him *L*

He has spent alot of time since then (this last year) complaining whenever i talk about my pleasure in eating healthy, or point out something interesting i've learned about possible food choices, or tried something new as a recipe.

I ignored his complaints *L*
I kept doing as i know i needed to for myself, and since i do all the grocery shopping and cooking, the bad choices he was making were totally his to control.

Thankfully, he eventually stopped complaining about my talking about my pleasure over food choices i was making, but he just buys himself big bags of junk food and hides them in his truck (thinking that means i don't know about them, not to prevent me from wanting them *L*).

In the last month he has seemed to be making one or two changes... taking veg in his lunches for work for example *L*. i dare not mention i have noticed this as if i do he will stop taking them. Yes, he is that difficult.

i think that once he saw how serious i was, how nothing he said or did changed the choices i made, or the pleasure i was getting out of my own improving health, and how many compliments i was getting from others (never him) he is finally, slowly, starting to 'almost' sound supportive.. at times *L*

Now he does not roll his eyes when i mention a new food i've tried and loved... in fact lately he has even been willing to taste it first before announcing he won't eat it *L* For him that is a major step forward *L*

The most recent accomplishment for him was giving in and actually tasting the no salt, no sugar added 'almond butter' i got. He surprised himself by liking it, and surprised me by actually admitting he did *LOL*

Old dogs (though he is 9 years younger than i am) can learn new tricks afterall! woohoo!

My husband has been very supportive. ALTHOUGH....I started running again this week and training for a half marathon. My husband started poo-pooing lastnight on my use of MFP. I think he is worried I am leaving him behind. I told him that I have loved the support he has given me and I would love for him to start training with me and get an account too, if he wanted. I think it really helped put it into perspective for him.

One thing about "The spouse" is that if they are anything but super healthy, marathon runners or powerlifters, they will tend to have some mixed emotions on your sucess. They dont want you to pass them up and leave them in the dust. If they are skinny and have a high metabolisim, they probably wish they could gain muscle better. If they are overweight or have a beer gut, though they may "act" complacent, they probably really do have some sort of complex problem. Men just are better at hiding it than us girls.

I have totally changed what we buy at the grocery store. I am really creative with seasoning so our healthier options actually tast really yummy. My husband hasn't complained at all....Well, except for the 269$ grocery bill last time....there is just two of us lol!!!
We buy his and hers Ice cream. His has 200 cal per serving and mine has 90. We buy Stacys' pita chips and ill have 6 or 10 while he eats the rest of the bag:) I also buy his cheese and my cheese. If I am making a meal I will seperate out stuff to only put on his. It makes it really easy for him to eat more of what he likes ( and can afforde to eat) but doesnt require me to make him a totally seperate meal.

I really can't complain.

He supports me in my weight loss goal. He even joined the gym with me because I really didn't want to go alone.

If he cooks a meal, which if often, he notes down exactly what he's cooked and how much so that I can log it all.

I weigh myself every Friday morning on the Wii board. If I'm feeling low, he coaxes me into weighing myself. If I end up gaining, he knows just what to say. If I lose weight, he congratulates me and says, "I knew you could do it."

More important than anything else, he has faith in me when I have none in myself

both. he is supportive in the sense that he's sensitive to what i want to eat, encourages me to take walks with him and stuff...but then can eat like a giant bowl of spaghetti and not gain a pound. or, he'll want to make a cake or cupcakes or something, and i just can't have that stuff around!

Mine is exactly the same. He is 6'4" and weighs less than me at 5'1.5". I secretly was pleased when he started gaining a few pounds the other month because of having to eat like crap all the time while on a trip for a class. I wanted to say ha ha that's what you get but I'm not that mean, lol.

He is unsupportive, but loves the changes that my body has made.
His being so negative only feeds into me wanting it that much more, so he is a help in that sense.
Just wish he would join in!

Unfortunately, this! And I really don't know how to change it.

In a word.....complicate!

Both! He fusses at me if I don't exercise but then eats junk food or wants to eat out! Can't win!

my hubby is both aswell, firstly he will look at what i am eating which is usually
healthy and comment should you be eating that,then he will have a cake or cookies
and ask do i want one or why dont i want one , i cant win with him.

My husband is 100% supportive but ours is a lifestyle change, not a weight loss issue. He will also eat all the vegetarian meals I fix and not complain.

My husband is wonderful and I reading these forums makes me realize how very fortunate I am to have such a man.