Awkward starving day with the inlaws yesterday:(

13

Replies

  • ItsMeRebekah
    ItsMeRebekah Posts: 909 Member
    as much broccoli I could without looking like an idiot.
    LOL i feels ya on that!
  • Kaddyshack21
    Kaddyshack21 Posts: 225 Member
    As far as denying food that someone offers, it's all about choosing your battles. Is it worth it to come off as rude or starting drama?

    I don't expect anyone to care that I'm trying to lose weight. Doing so, and then not getting the reaction you want, will only cause disappointment. Plan ahead next time, or eat what you can. One day of not eating ideally (including a Pepsi) is not going to undo months of work.

    I agree. At the risk of offending of the inlaws. Is it really worth it??? I mean it is impossible to know the whole situation, but you got to give and take a little. Especially when people are sick and overcoming illness one cookie is not really the issue here. Family is.
  • jilers
    jilers Posts: 94 Member
    Take this as a learning experience to have some healthy snacks in your purse or car. Breathing helps also:happy:
  • kaetmarie
    kaetmarie Posts: 668 Member
    I didn't read through everyone's responses, but I always make sure to have some snacks in my purse ... because in addition to trying to lose weight, I'm also allergic to gluten -- so if I don't, I can't be sure there will be something that I can eat...gluten sneaks into everything.

    I also always try to eat a snack (or small meal) right before we go somewhere where I don't know what's being served...just in case. You can get pretty far by just picking at things and "eating" slowly while pushing the rest of the food around your plate. My husband and I even do a plate swap if there's stuff I can't/don't want to eat and I don't want to be rude.

    Sounds like you controlled yourself pretty well, though! If I was that hungry, I probably would have gone buck wild! Be prepared next time !!
  • 2hungariangirls
    2hungariangirls Posts: 220
    :( OK..... I'm going to be the mean one here.... but with all the "driving time".... If i was that STARVING I would have hit a grocery store, a conveneince store or even a gas station .... I'm sorry I just can't see why you didn't think of that


    I was thinking the same thing. Being in the car all that time you must have passed a zillion (okay, not a zillion) but many, many places you could have found nourishment.
  • yummummum
    yummummum Posts: 257
    Sorry you had such a hard day!!! I have SO been there. I now just pack my own food. Emergency food in my purse and depending on the situation just make the best of the meal like you did.
  • sofitheteacup
    sofitheteacup Posts: 396 Member
    :( OK..... I'm going to be the mean one here.... but with all the "driving time".... If i was that STARVING I would have hit a grocery store, a convenience store or even a gas station .... I'm sorry I just can't see why you didn't think of that

    This is what I came to say. Pack snacks next time. Doesn't mean you have to eat them. I'm one of those people who has to have food physically away and out of sight, or I will eat it- so I popped a few granola bars and portion bags of my favorite crackers in my glove box one day, and I usually don't remember they're in there... Until I'm super hungry or stuck in traffic and my stomach is growling, and I can grab something without feeling guilty or feeling obligated to have something that isn't on my plan.
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
    I'm surprised at how many people are congratulating OP for starving herself all day and being miserable. I don't see any praise-worthy behavior here. This was in no way a "healthy" day.
  • KAREN1691
    KAREN1691 Posts: 9 Member
    Poor you what a day, well done with all your hard work though xx hugs
  • bevskiwolf
    bevskiwolf Posts: 296 Member
    Please pack a cooler or zip lock any time you leave the house. Toss in protein bars or if you have a cooler, hummus, meats, cheeses, even some fruit if you tolerate it. Even if I leave for a few hours, I carry a zip lock with me. In mine is usually a protein shot, a protein bar, extra water and sometimes even a meal bar. I refuse to be stuck anywhere without my security blanket! HUGS!
  • ilookthetype
    ilookthetype Posts: 3,021 Member
    I hope you let your son have some snacks along the way!!

    Ditto this.

    Also, learn to eat within your calorie allowance, don't forbid foods when you're that hungry.
  • shamrockbride
    shamrockbride Posts: 16
    Constructive critism is one thing. Accusing me of not feeding my son and calling me names is another. I will always pack a snack, thank you for those suggestions
    The question of whether the kid was hungry was asked, and you answered it. I did wonder the same thing, as you mentioned not having eaten and that the baby was crying. Folks were curious.

    I missed the name-calling. Where was that?

    Edit: Yeah, reviewed the thread, and cannot find any name-calling. Sweetheart, folks were just providing feedback. No, not everyone was supportive of your decision to starve yourself. They offered their opinions.

    You cannot see the name calling because I hit "report this reply" and they are now gone. The first one was : decisions like these are why you are a fatty. I will leave it at that. I did appriciate the suggestions of snacks. I could not stop for food, only a person in my shoes could make that decision. I was writing to vent and hoping for support. I have had 6 friend requests and 8 messages of support including one from a LONG time member who cannot believe the response to this thread and who are apologizing for your responses. Good luck to you, you will never see me on these boards again, I and many others have learned many lessons here! BTW- I am far from your sweetheart!
  • onedayillbamilf
    onedayillbamilf Posts: 662 Member
    Constructive critism is one thing. Accusing me of not feeding my son and calling me names is another. I will always pack a snack, thank you for those suggestions
    The question of whether the kid was hungry was asked, and you answered it. I did wonder the same thing, as you mentioned not having eaten and that the baby was crying. Folks were curious.

    I missed the name-calling. Where was that?

    Edit: Yeah, reviewed the thread, and cannot find any name-calling. Sweetheart, folks were just providing feedback. No, not everyone was supportive of your decision to starve yourself. They offered their opinions.

    You cannot see the name calling because I hit "report this reply" and they are now gone. The first one was : decisions like these are why you are a fatty. I will leave it at that. I did appriciate the suggestions of snacks. I could not stop for food, only a person in my shoes could make that decision. I was writing to vent and hoping for support. I have had 6 friend requests and 8 messages of support including one from a LONG time member who cannot believe the response to this thread and who are apologizing for your responses. Good luck to you, you will never see me on these boards again, I and many others have learned many lessons here! BTW- I am far from your sweetheart!

    Do you need a snack?
  • AlbertPooHoles
    AlbertPooHoles Posts: 530 Member
    Constructive critism is one thing. Accusing me of not feeding my son and calling me names is another. I will always pack a snack, thank you for those suggestions
    The question of whether the kid was hungry was asked, and you answered it. I did wonder the same thing, as you mentioned not having eaten and that the baby was crying. Folks were curious.

    I missed the name-calling. Where was that?

    Edit: Yeah, reviewed the thread, and cannot find any name-calling. Sweetheart, folks were just providing feedback. No, not everyone was supportive of your decision to starve yourself. They offered their opinions.

    You cannot see the name calling because I hit "report this reply" and they are now gone. The first one was : decisions like these are why you are a fatty. I will leave it at that. I did appriciate the suggestions of snacks. I could not stop for food, only a person in my shoes could make that decision. I was writing to vent and hoping for support. I have had 6 friend requests and 8 messages of support including one from a LONG time member who cannot believe the response to this thread and who are apologizing for your responses. Good luck to you, you will never see me on these boards again, I and many others have learned many lessons here! BTW- I am far from your sweetheart!
    :flowerforyou:
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
    I could not stop for food, only a person in my shoes could make that decision.
    It's hard to believe that you couldn't stop at a gas station for 3 minutes and buy a bag of nuts. But even if that's so, food was offered to you and you turned it down.
    I was writing to vent and hoping for support.
    Sorry but there's no way I can support such bad decisions. It's not a good idea to get so hungry that you are sick. This is unhealthy behavior and I think that needed to be addressed.
  • guypaul2
    guypaul2 Posts: 1
    Congrats on having lost 42 pounds. Since I started dieting last May I have found my relatives to be totally unsupportive with downright nasty comments that make it clear to me that they are only interested in my failures. To avoid any further angst, I keep quiet about it - after all, I am doing this for me, not them. :wink:
  • chottyyoung1
    chottyyoung1 Posts: 19 Member
    WOW...I have been on here for a few days and have so far loved it. This thread makes me scared to post anything! Geezzze she was VENTING.
    WTF people?
  • sillygoose1977
    sillygoose1977 Posts: 2,151 Member
    So it's a lesson learned about planning ahead and never relying on others for food that you are willing to eat. Now take a deep breath and move on.
  • Suziq2you
    Suziq2you Posts: 396 Member
    Now I want cookies and pork chops.

    Lesson: Always pack snacks and never turn down a cookie. :drinker:
  • LucianaPrado
    LucianaPrado Posts: 11
    I totally understand you because it´s like that with my husband´s family too. They are all thin and they think there is no harm in eating sweets and all. If that was all, it would be fine, but they are always making comments on my weight... Which led to some disagreements in the past. I simply will not have them criticizing me. I weigh 132 lbs, it´s not like I am obese.. And even if I were, I am my husband´s choice, not theirs, so DEAL with it!

    My mother in law is Portuguese and if anyone knows Portuguese people will understand: there is always a lot of food and they will not take no as answer. Good thing is that good part of the Portuguese food they offer me is healthy, and I don´t even like her cooking so it´s very easy to keep my portions small. So I eat that and leave the rest. She used to try to force it down my throat, but I stand true to my principles. One day I was in a really crappy mood and she did that... And I ended up telling her "didn´t you tell me I was fat? How am I supposed to change that if you´re making me eat this kind of food?" I really regret having been rude but I´m relieved that since that day she hasn´t imposed any food on me anymore.

    I obviously make up to them by being nice most of the time and visiting them almost weekly and generally have a good relationship.

    I always plan what I will eat on days out like that to avoid problems. Fruit, healthy biscuits and cereal bar are my top pics.

    Keep up the good work on your commitment. Just be sure to plan :) Thats the key to success.
  • kpkeack
    kpkeack Posts: 3 Member
    Be proud of yourself! I would have started with the cookies and then moved on to a bottle of wine and then I probably would have just kept eating and eating and eating...
    It is tough to not give in for me especially when I am in a stressed or emotional environment. I will keep you in mind (and I will remember how you did not give in) next time I am in this situation. I agree with earlier post too- keeping healthy snacks handy is a great idea too. Good luck with the family. Sounds like there's a lot going on. Just be proud of yourself and your healthy body.

    See, there ARE nice people here! Don't give up - just ignore the ones who rub you the wrong way. No one means any harm, I think. You're on the go and have enough to deal with - don't feel bad- you did so great under the circumstances.

    We're always on the run and FAR away from civilization (our truck/mini-mart/grocery store/Wendy's). My favorite on-hand snack is the Kashi TLC Trail mix Chewy Granola Bar. Costco sells them really cheap, too. It's balanced and works for a fast breakfast or snack, and is so yummy. You can SEE the grains and almonds and cranberries in it. Not too sweet and not salty. We also pack cheese sticks, dry roasted almonds, and those tiny sweet clemetines with us wherever we go. In my experience, you CAN eat a warm cheesestick as long as it hasn't been in the car for days!

    Simple well balanced snacks have saved me many times - I get very cranky, kind of dumb, and feel ill when I need some food. If I need food I can't make a decision to save my life, so having something to prevent that helps a lot. It's about balancing some carbs, fiber, and fat to keep your body and brain fueled. There are several good articles around about great simple snack combos that work like that.

    This is the first time I've read a post in here and the first comment I've made- because I felt bad that some people seemed to be going kind of nuts on you." Moderation in all things" - ESPECIALLY people! :explode: LOL!
  • chachita7
    chachita7 Posts: 996 Member
    What we are all trying to say is... what you did was not healthy at all. Your body needs fuel to function properly, reason why you were feeling sick.

    I myself could have phrased my response better as well.

    It is a good idea to keep snacks in the car, purse, baby bag (since you have to have that regardless). If a situation like this arises again simply take what it is being offered and do it in moderation - one day of not so healthy fuel couldn't possibly damage your progress.

    Don't give up on the site - we only get aggressive when we know for sure that your health is at stake with what you are doing or trying to do...
  • kit_katty
    kit_katty Posts: 992 Member
    Just a quick comment on cookies, my father brought home peanut butter cookies that were made by a local bakery. Me watching calories looked at the count, 290 PER COOKIE! So just be careful when choosing to eat just a few cookies at someone's house. Just saying.
  • pg1girl
    pg1girl Posts: 268 Member
    Thanks for the replies. First of all, my son ate all day because I did pack food for him. Second, I am not eating sugar so one pepsi would have not been good for me at all. I had Gestational Diabetes 6 months ago and have not eaten much sugar for about a year. I did not rudely refuse the food. The plates were put out and I did not take anything from them. We did have a plan to go out for lunch, which failed so I definatly learned something here. I will pack snacks. As for stopping at the store. We were in the middle of nowhere, and when we left house #2 my son was screaming so stopping at a store was just not in cards. Thank you to everyone for the positive feedback and for those negative comments, I think the old saying of if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it! Especially on a support group board! good lord:P

    I have had days like that and I totally understand. You sound like a wonderful momma....don't listen to what others have said above. I try to pack snacks too but sometimes our days just don't go as planned and we get too busy. That is called being human! So fellow humans above.....stop judging and start supporting!
  • Alisha_countrymama
    Alisha_countrymama Posts: 821 Member
    After reading this I think I will always carry a low carb bar in my purse! LOL
  • WonderKP
    WonderKP Posts: 146 Member
    ughg!! what a horrible day, makes you kinda glad when it's over, eh? Hope it doesn't happen again!
  • ttrussel
    ttrussel Posts: 99 Member
    And I tend to agree with them, one Pepsi was NOT going to make a difference here....

    Well it depends. No, one pepsi isn't going to make a huge difference. Unless you're like me, and you have almost a literal addiction to soda. One coke *will* cause me to fall of the wagon. One coke will lead to another and the next thing I know I'm drinking it every day. I know that there are "bad" foods thatI can still eat once in awhile and be fine, but sugared soda is not one of them. It's a very slippery slope for me, so it might be that way for the OP as well.


    My sister is the same... She has ONE Dr. Pepper and it's goodbye diet. I'm sure you'll think to stuff a snack in the bag next time but you sure demonstrated willpower!
  • smithwick324
    smithwick324 Posts: 9
    I always have a water, and some sought of snack with me. Ex. protein bar, some nuts or fruit!
  • WonderKP
    WonderKP Posts: 146 Member
    I could not stop for food, only a person in my shoes could make that decision.
    It's hard to believe that you couldn't stop at a gas station for 3 minutes and buy a bag of nuts. But even if that's so, food was offered to you and you turned it down.
    I was writing to vent and hoping for support.
    Sorry but there's no way I can support such bad decisions. It's not a good idea to get so hungry that you are sick. This is unhealthy behavior and I think that needed to be addressed.

    geez!! calm down, it was one day! everyone has weird/ not-convenient food days.... poor girl is trying to stick with her diet and it was just a pain-in-the-*kitten* kind of day. It happens! Sorry you had a rough day!
  • Melany502
    Melany502 Posts: 77 Member
    I think not eating for 9 hours is way worse than eating something less than healthy. I would have taken some cheez-its for sure. Skipping meals is NO good for you! I do great most days, but if situations arise where I have to choose between eating something not-so-good and nothing at all, you bet I will be eating some junk and working out harder the next day!
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