Help! My one of my kids doesn't want me to lose weight!

summertime_girl · February 2012

I can't even imagine one of my kids being distressed about weight loss. Sounds like there's something underlying that's causing him to act out like that.

Contrarian · February 2012

What a delightfully eccentric and sensitive child! He'll get used to the new you, especially once he sees all things you are able to do.

killagb · February 2012

Really? I was under the impression that when parents act like things don't bother them - their kids then respond accordingly, like skipping off to play with anything more interesting than sweaty parents. I do have both a 9 year old and a 7 year old, neither cry that I'm hoping to get fit and live longer. But then, I don't have devotions about it so maybe that's different.

Re: being "around" I've only been on here less than 90 days. I've lost some weight and my kids love me even more since I can keep up with them.

So, every child in the world will respond the same way your children do? Because all children are the same and will act the same?

And a woman asking for advice, on a site meant for support, for how to explain to her child that things will be okay is trying to find an excuse to quit?

Rather presumptuous, isn't that?

No wonder I stopped posting here so long ago...

Well thank goodness you didn't just post again or anything.

The child is jealous of you and wants to sabotage you. :drinker:

NatalieWinning · February 2012

My youngest is like that. I tried to focus on "healthy" and eventually she would look back and admit I look much better. I'd have to tell her we want her Dad to live a good long healthy life to be with her as she grows up, too. I had 2 kids that were really adverse to any change. I'd just comfort them and go forward. Eventually they are happy with the new.

AlbertPooHoles · February 2012

Maybe the kid's right.

Livi_Loves_Pink · February 2012

Really? I was under the impression that when parents act like things don't bother them - their kids then respond accordingly, like skipping off to play with anything more interesting than sweaty parents. I do have both a 9 year old and a 7 year old, neither cry that I'm hoping to get fit and live longer. But then, I don't have devotions about it so maybe that's different.

Re: being "around" I've only been on here less than 90 days. I've lost some weight and my kids love me even more since I can keep up with them.

So, every child in the world will respond the same way your children do? Because all children are the same and will act the same?

And a woman asking for advice, on a site meant for support, for how to explain to her child that things will be okay is trying to find an excuse to quit?

Rather presumptuous, isn't that?

No wonder I stopped posting here so long ago...

Well thank goodness you didn't just post again or anything.

The child is jealous of you and wants to sabotage you. :drinker:

Yes, thank goodness for that.

A rare moment of not thinking before I post. I realize my post wasn't helpful, and I apologize for my lack of decorum.

To actually add something to the discussion; As a child my view of my father was very much tied into his appearance. I thought of him as a big, cuddly, protective bear and I imagine the thought of him being thin would have distressed me. But as others have said, if you've explained it to him and he's still upset then I think you'll just have to wait for him to get over it... and maybe keep an eye out for an underlying cause to his extreme reaction.

Now... back to my habitual lurking.

slightlycrunchy · February 2012

Sometimes change, especially in a parent, makes kids uncomfortable. He will get over it. Try not to make your weight loss plans a big issue around here, and involve him in the things you're doing to get healthier without saying you're doing it because you want to change. What you're saying might be, "Mom's trying to lose weight because she wants to be healthier and do more things" but what a child can hear is "Mom is unhappy and wants to be different." That's a pretty scary concept!

Try to normalize what you're doing. Feed your family the same food you're eating. Take your kids for walks or have them do pushups or jump rope with you, or whatever activities you're doing that he can join you with. He will adjust. Your loss will be gradual (if you had a larger than average initial loss that he noticed, that will probably even out) and he might not even notice it much from here on out. He will get over his anxiety.

Edited because I just realized in your first post that you said he likes you the way that he is. Is your son overweight? Because if so, he may also be taking your weight loss personally, and thinking this will make you guys too different from eachother, or if you have to change yourself because you're overweight, you'll also have to make him change, or that you are judging him for being overweight.

beautyreaps · February 2012

You mentioned you've changed the way you cook. Any money says he's displeased with the "new healthy" food and misses the "old days" (whatever you ate before). In which case, you should find substitutes for the food he does like or moderate the servings. There are many ways to alter recipes to make them better for the family without them being aware of it. He may also struggle with esteem issues, so it'd be best to keep your cool and continue what you're doing. This will benefit you all in the long run, BUT don't restrict foods or deprive them of their favourite foods either; it's a life change after all.

Good luck.

Dgwells29 · February 2012

Those who live with me barely even noticed when I lost my first 20 or so pounds. But, when I went to visit friends and family that's when all the fuss began. They noticed for sure! 90lbs later EVERYBODY noticed. :blushing: :blushing: :blushing:

He won't really notice the gradual weight loss.

jayliospecky · February 2012

Really? I was under the impression that when parents act like things don't bother them - their kids then respond accordingly, like skipping off to play with anything more interesting than sweaty parents. I do have both a 9 year old and a 7 year old, neither cry that I'm hoping to get fit and live longer. But then, I don't have devotions about it so maybe that's different.

Re: being "around" I've only been on here less than 90 days. I've lost some weight and my kids love me even more since I can keep up with them.

So, every child in the world will respond the same way your children do? Because all children are the same and will act the same?

And a woman asking for advice, on a site meant for support, for how to explain to her child that things will be okay is trying to find an excuse to quit?

Rather presumptuous, isn't that?

No wonder I stopped posting here so long ago...

Well thank goodness you didn't just post again or anything.

The child is jealous of you and wants to sabotage you. :drinker:

My dog is jealous of my weight loss and is trying to sabotage me. He stares at me when I'm getting his food. Meaningfully.

BuckeyeBabe10 · February 2012

Really? I was under the impression that when parents act like things don't bother them - their kids then respond accordingly, like skipping off to play with anything more interesting than sweaty parents. I do have both a 9 year old and a 7 year old, neither cry that I'm hoping to get fit and live longer. But then, I don't have devotions about it so maybe that's different.

Re: being "around" I've only been on here less than 90 days. I've lost some weight and my kids love me even more since I can keep up with them.

So, every child in the world will respond the same way your children do? Because all children are the same and will act the same?

And a woman asking for advice, on a site meant for support, for how to explain to her child that things will be okay is trying to find an excuse to quit?

Rather presumptuous, isn't that?

No wonder I stopped posting here so long ago...

Well thank goodness you didn't just post again or anything.

The child is jealous of you and wants to sabotage you. :drinker:

My dog is jealous of my weight loss and is trying to sabotage me. He stares at me when I'm getting his food. Meaningfully.

Hahahaha! Touche! My cat is actually HELPING me with my weight loss. Every time I'm eating something she sits down right in front of me and stares at me with her big eyes until I either stop eating or I share it with her. Who knew pets/animal companions could encourage weight loss too!

)

jayliospecky · February 2012

Really? I was under the impression that when parents act like things don't bother them - their kids then respond accordingly, like skipping off to play with anything more interesting than sweaty parents. I do have both a 9 year old and a 7 year old, neither cry that I'm hoping to get fit and live longer. But then, I don't have devotions about it so maybe that's different.

Re: being "around" I've only been on here less than 90 days. I've lost some weight and my kids love me even more since I can keep up with them.

So, every child in the world will respond the same way your children do? Because all children are the same and will act the same?

And a woman asking for advice, on a site meant for support, for how to explain to her child that things will be okay is trying to find an excuse to quit?

Rather presumptuous, isn't that?

No wonder I stopped posting here so long ago...

Well thank goodness you didn't just post again or anything.

The child is jealous of you and wants to sabotage you. :drinker:

My dog is jealous of my weight loss and is trying to sabotage me. He stares at me when I'm getting his food. Meaningfully.

Hahahaha! Touche! My cat is actually HELPING me with my weight loss. Every time I'm eating something she sits down right in front of me and stares at me with her big eyes until I either stop eating or I share it with her. Who knew pets/animal companions could encourage weight loss too! )

Does she stare at you while you're getting into your car? Because I would NOT give her the keys.

Help! My one of my kids doesn't want me to lose weight!

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