WOW! How did this happen?

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  • KareninCanada
    KareninCanada Posts: 962 Member
    I do worry because a boy in her class dated every girl but her and want's to date her now. This is what she told me.

    Talk about your teachable moments.... wow. Too bad that boy's parents haven't been as diligent as you are being. Here's her chance to see herself as worth more than a pre-teen version of a mark on a bedpost.
  • ChickenTuna
    ChickenTuna Posts: 24 Member
    In my opinion 4th, 5th and 6th grade should be in elementary schools still. My 6th grader is in middle school with 7th and 8th graders and I don't like it one bit. Thankfully, he is painfully shy and won't even hardly talk with girls. And we have been very open and honest with him, so I'm praying he will be the same with us. Also, thankful that I have 4 boys and not girls!!
  • jenncaroon
    jenncaroon Posts: 91
    I feel for you and your situation. Please don't lump all public schools or the people working with your children in one category. I value the parent - child relationship beyond any other each child has. I teach with many people who feel the same. We are a team working toward helping children succeed. We value all teammates, especially a child's family. Reach out knowing that most teachers are in it for the right reasons. Have a wonderful day. Your daughter is lucky to have you!
  • ChickenTuna
    ChickenTuna Posts: 24 Member
    Be careful and be aware...I have worked with middle school kids for over 15 yrs and have seen the dating scene that occurs. Although sex is a major concern, another great concern is how these impressionable minds deal with rejection and break ups. I have seen little boys who stalk girls because that are so wrapped up in the relationship. And, little girls who become suicidal because they boy starts liking another girl and they are no longer worthy. In short, talk to your daughter and let her know that boy friends come in time...right now let's just have boys who are friends
  • NewTeena
    NewTeena Posts: 154 Member
    So scared.:frown:
    My 10 year old and I had a dissagreement. At the end of the conversation she asks me... are you ready for this? Brace your self.
    Can I start dating?
    Say what?
    "All my friends are doing it." she states.
    I'm taken aback. I was not expecting it but she does go to a middle school with 6th graders. It just blew my mind because at that age they don't really understand to the full extent of the adult meaning.
    Life is just going WAY too fast and it made my heart sad to see her growing up so fast. I don't want to keep her a baby forever just slow down her desire to be a grown up right this seccond. Be sure to hug your little ones and let them know how special they are to you before all of a sudden life has happend and you missed it.
    No, they don't understand the adult meaning, but it's a good idea to ask her what dating means to her. I found with my kids and their friends they would say things without knowing what it meant. My son "dated" when he was that age, and for him it meant they ate lunch together, they picked each other as partners in gym class, they hung out at lunch. What you don't want to do is make a huge deal of it because if you do they might just start doing things behind your back. As a parent my preference was to know what was going on even if I didn't like it. We don't have to like our kids' choices, but it's our job to help them make good (or better) choices.
  • SueInAz
    SueInAz Posts: 6,592 Member
    I do worry because a boy in her class dated every girl but her and want's to date her now. This is what she told me.

    Talk about your teachable moments.... wow. Too bad that boy's parents haven't been as diligent as you are being. Here's her chance to see herself as worth more than a pre-teen version of a mark on a bedpost.
    I have to second this. I think your daughter is not too early to learn this lesson.

    It might be worth it to have a frank discussion about this and ask her why she wants to date a boy who has dated then dumped, every other girl in her class. Point out that if he's done it to every other girl, he'll do it her and it's not a situation she'll enjoy. Ask her why she thinks he waited to ask her out until the very end. Does she really want to be associated with a boy like that? These last few questions can be delicate but how you phrase it can make all the difference and you know your daughter best. It can also help to set her up for a lifetime of being confident enough to reject those who obviously don't hold her in high regard and knowing her own self-worth, rather than judging it by what others think about her.
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