Dating question men!..please help!!!!

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13

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  • patricknsmith
    patricknsmith Posts: 261 Member
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    I want a Darth Vader bear...Anyway, I say go ahead with the gift. It's not about timing or "rules", it's about going with instinct. I'm a Star Wars fan myself, and if a girl gave me anything Star Wars related I'd be uber happy.
  • fh1951
    fh1951 Posts: 441 Member
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    I lost a few brain cells reading this...

    me too, but i'm drinking a manhattan
  • MissyJessy
    MissyJessy Posts: 1,279 Member
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    Last time I checked men prefer BJs to bears.

    (and who gives stuffed animals to grown adults??)

    ETA: stuffed animals are intimate gifts - if you play that way.

    ill have to google that later damn filters on work computers :devil:

    BJs or yiffing?

    apparently their is a whole underground society of kinky teddy bear pornography that i was never informed of. I shall have to do some research... i am also not aware of what yiffing is....

    You learn something new everyday... Maybe they are all into the bear pornography and we all dont know it... it could be just like a girl putting on a princess what ever her name is outfit and role playing with her "guy" (not that i have done this)
    Maybe Darth Vader is a big deal right now :tongue: :love:
  • onedayillbamilf
    onedayillbamilf Posts: 662 Member
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    I think it is awesome!!! Give him the bear forget about any so called rules. Do what feels right!

    I really need to read threads before reading responses! A teddy bear is NOT what I thought you were referring to! Coffee please....someone, anyone, I need coffee STAT!
  • MissyJessy
    MissyJessy Posts: 1,279 Member
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    yiffing is not what i was referring too (now that i know what it means lol) i ment literally attempting to be intimate with a teddy bear.

    That is all

    Thank you
  • killagb
    killagb Posts: 3,280 Member
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  • onedayillbamilf
    onedayillbamilf Posts: 662 Member
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    I agree with Contrarian ... there are SO MANY Star Wars related trinkets she can buy ... and IMO a teddy bear is kind of an intimate gift to give an adult you've only been dating two weeks.

    Buy him a pez dispenser or a tee-shirt, and save the stuffed animals for 1] when you're sure he would even appreciate a stuffed bear and 2] you've been banging for a while.

    I agree. She shouldn't give him the bear until she gives him "the bear".
  • judykritikos
    judykritikos Posts: 161
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    Perhaps I'm the old fashioned one here - but here are my thoughts: They've only been having lunch 2 weeks. That's not really dating. They're just eating together. He is paying, so TECHNICALLY you could stretch it to be a date, but it's not really a date-date.
    They're in the get-to-know you stages - which is when you're SUPPOSED to be talking and getting to know each other, not jumping into bed before you even know their middle name. So they are taking it slow and reasonable.
    As to the gift - since they both enjoy that kind of thing - it'll be something of interest they share. The determining factor is the cost. if it's not expensive, it's fun and light-hearted - then go for it. If it's pricey - then don't do it. Investing a lot of money at this stage says (1) I have a lot of money to spend, or (2) I'm desperate and will spend my rent money to get your attention.
    Obviously dating has changed in the last 30 years - and THAT being said - is probably why there are fewer marriages, and a lot of people living together (which tells me women give it up so easily they're not valued much). Ok, I can take it - I know it'll be coming...
  • MissyJessy
    MissyJessy Posts: 1,279 Member
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    Times have changed women are allowed to exploit men for sex just as much as they have to women for decades (not an attack on men just saying we are equal in the skanking it up department)
  • terrellc1
    terrellc1 Posts: 231 Member
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    Last time I checked men prefer BJs to bears.

    (and who gives stuffed animals to grown adults??)

    ETA: stuffed animals are intimate gifts - if you play that way.

    I think there was a CSI episode on that once. Creepy people dressing up in furry costumes on purpose and then getting it on. EEK
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,248 Member
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    I don't know any men who enjoy Build-a-bear.

    This.

    A Darth Vader mug filled with Hershey's kisses, M&Ms, or peanuts, on the other hand...
  • p1xelate
    p1xelate Posts: 141 Member
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    I think it is awesome!!! Give him the bear forget about any so called rules. Do what feels right!

    I am not a guy but this ^^^^^
  • chevy88grl
    chevy88grl Posts: 3,937 Member
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    Well. I'm not a guy.

    But, here's my opinion anyway:

    I think it depends on the guy and how the "relationship" is going. I don't necessarily think this is a question that is easily answered by someone else nor with a simple yes, do it or no, don't.

    Some guys would find a bear immature and stupid. Other guys may find it sweet. It really depends on the guy's personality. Since they've only gone out for a couple weeks, it may be hard for her to gauge his reaction to it.

    If she thinks he'll think it is cool and like it? Go for it. If she's questioning the decision to do it, then don't.
  • catherine4211
    catherine4211 Posts: 944 Member
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    3 years ago on Valentines day a guy I was seeing gave me a teddy bear. I threw it in the trash.
  • Shazam43
    Shazam43 Posts: 1
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    corny...for sure. What will the bear mean in 10 days? As an alternate, a magazine subscription of a topic he's interested in costs the same and reminds him of the gift every month (or week if it's Sports Illustrated). my 2 cents and good luck to both of them. PS: I am a guy, 43.
  • MissyJessy
    MissyJessy Posts: 1,279 Member
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    corny...for sure. What will the bear mean in 10 days? As an alternate, a magazine subscription of a topic he's interested in costs the same and reminds him of the gift every month (or week if it's Sports Illustrated). my 2 cents and good luck to both of them. PS: I am a guy, 43.

    a guy lookin to score a free subscription to sports illustrated
  • JakeMallory
    JakeMallory Posts: 9
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    Get the bear. He sounds nerdy so he should dig it. If he doesn't and throws it in the trash that tells you what kind of person he is. She shouldn't be dating someone who would throw a darth bear away. Don't worry about it being too strong, someone needs to make a move before you end up in the "friend zone".
  • chevy88grl
    chevy88grl Posts: 3,937 Member
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    3 years ago on Valentines day a guy I was seeing gave me a teddy bear. I threw it in the trash.

    Wow. People really do this?

    For our first Valentine's Day together, I gave my boyfriend a bear. I knew when I bought it he isn't the overly gushy, sweet type -- but he still has the bear sitting on his desk. I'm sure he doesn't tell us his friends about it, but really? He kept it and that means a lot. I really can't imagine throwing a bear in the trash unless it was from some creepy guy I don't like. But, whatever.
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
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    She should give him the bear.
  • samcee
    samcee Posts: 307
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    It depends how much the guy is into her. A girl could give him a chewing gum packet and he would think its gold if he was very into her.

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