I don't make friends easily...

13

Replies

  • GymAnJuice
    GymAnJuice Posts: 512 Member
    oh my gosh, i nearly fell off my chair reading all these posts, i don't think i'v ever met anyone like me and now i'm reading pages off people in the same situation, lack of confidence, ppl thinking i'm posh when i'm far from it..apart from i can shop for england..i just cant fit in the clothes lol feel free to add me, the more the merrier
  • SandyChampWins
    SandyChampWins Posts: 133 Member
    Libby, you just discribed me! I think we are kindred spirits. Self confidence is not something I have had an abundance of either.
    Will you be my friend?
    Sandy
  • LolasEpicJourney
    LolasEpicJourney Posts: 1,010 Member
    I dont like to gossip - or chat on the phone - im not overly girly either.
    i make aquantances with pretty much everyone i meet- and get along with pretty much anyone - but seldom people get close to me

    i totally feel where you are coming from. i have two really close friends that have survived years - and i cling to those few friendships - its too bad they both live hours and hours away
  • puggleperson
    puggleperson Posts: 740 Member
    wow you just explained me to a T ..That is the story of my life... :D
  • pinuplove
    pinuplove Posts: 12,871 Member
    Can I just say, this thread rocks! Anybody is welcome to add me because obviously we are all kindred spirits. We need our own con - Intro-con, no small talk necessary! We could just sit and stare at our shoes :laugh:
  • It's very strange to see a thread with so many people that are similar to me. The way you described yourself (and the way others have followed) is me, but way better than I could have written. I posted my introduction a few weeks ago and tried to describe myself accurately, but even over the internet I think I may have come off as stuck up. Although I may have hinted that I wouldn't just except a friend request from anyone, so I guess I can't blame anyone from not jumping at the chance to be my MFP friend. Since then I have tried to be more open and have found some really amazing MFP friends. If you would like to add me to your list feel free. I'm very encouraging and supportive online and much more social than I am in the "real world." Thanks for your post!
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
    I'm in the same boat. I have very very few friends but many acquaintances so I'm with you there. Sent you a friend request, add me and lets get rid of those lbs!
  • pinuplove
    pinuplove Posts: 12,871 Member
    I just thought of a joke. Forgive me, but I'm an accountant and find it eerily accurate!

    How do you recognize an introverted accountant? He's staring at his shoes.
    How do you recognize an extroverted accountant? He's staring at YOUR shoes :laugh:
  • i'm very similar... can count on one hand how many good friends i've had over the years, sending a friend request!
  • I tend to push other women away because I don't like the drama that comes with them. I have a handful of friends and don't like to socialize unless I have to. Not saying I am a hermit, just prefer to stay home with my family. If I go out its for a scrapbook weekend where I can sit in a corner and concentrate on me time, very rarely do I have girls nights or go shopping with friends. I hate shopping and only buy things for my kids when I do go.
  • Whatcha like? I'm huge into PARANORMAL ROMANCE. My favorite authors are J.R Ward (The Blackdagger Brotherhood) and Kresley Cole (The Immortals after dark). Each time I have reccommended these to patrons they have come back begging me to find them more books. LOL Some other good series are: The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo series by Steig Larsson , The Hunger Games By Suzzanne Collins, The Janet Evanovich Books, Gah.....there are soooo many.

    I love paranormal romance. I will have to look up some of those titles.
  • I don't like people and currently have no "real friends" either. A person has to be pretty special to be considered a true friend to me and most people fall short. I have a lot of close acquaintances, but I'm only really close with my family and pets. I have a 12 year old black lab as well, a 2 year old yellow lab, and a 2 year old kitty. Feel free to add me if you are interested.
  • I just thought of a joke. Forgive me, but I'm an accountant and find it eerily accurate!

    How do you recognize an introverted accountant? He's staring at his shoes.
    How do you recognize an extroverted accountant? He's staring at YOUR shoes :laugh:

    That's hilarious!
  • I also have all of these social issues! Although I don't count hating to go shopping as an issue. You know it's the ones who like it that have a problem lol. In fact my husband gets me thouroughly drunk before company dinners just so I'll eat and talk to people. Wierd huh!
  • esjaygee
    esjaygee Posts: 148 Member
    I feel the same as a lot of you, though from the other side of the gender aisle. As I grow older I seem to have less and less RL friends and more acquaintances that I hang around with from time to time. I'm definitely an introvert and tend to be somewhat sarcastic at times myself. I'm a cat person too but had to give mine up since my wife was very allergic. Luckily my mom adopted her (the cat lol) so I still get to see her when I stop over.

    I started myself on MFP in January with over 100 pounds to lose and would love to have some new supportive MFP friends that are in a similar situation to myself.
  • Carita79
    Carita79 Posts: 64 Member
    I am rite there with yah!
    I have always had buddies..but true friends that arent family..or my bf..not so much.
    I am also sarcastic and not overly girly..the girls and women i start to get close to usually scare me off with competition and the gossip..oh lordy the gossip ..i dont feel confident and trusting when all they wanna do is *****..gripe and disect evryone they encounter! too many hidden agendas for me!
    I spose thats why i am a guys girl..always fit in better with the dudes..
    ..and i hate talking on the phone too..i treat it as communication tool..not entertainment!
    I prefer to work, cook, read..paint..go outside and play with my furry son..Kilo doggie :) or snuggle my man!
    Going to a bar or club and getting all dressed up..is not my idea of a good time..more like soul crushing torture!...untill i have a couple beers anyways ;)

    Cheers to everyone who shared on this link.. :) we are not alone huh!
  • mskari77
    mskari77 Posts: 142
    I dont make friends very well either. I just don't know how to do the small talk thing. I am not very aggressive, in that I don't initiate contact very often. I wil gladly respond to things though.
    Most women I meet tend to dislike me. My husband thought I was crazy for years when I told him this, but he began seeing it as well. I have one really good friend, and I consider my husband to be my best friend. I am not 100% girly...I like to get girly when we go out, other than that I am in workout clothes, and probably a mess from the gym. I hate to shop (though I do love shoes), talking on the phone with anyone other than my husband or mom gives me serious anxiety. I don't do gossip. I hate catty women.
    Now that I have made myself sound completely socially inept.....I sent you a friend request! :)
  • mskari77
    mskari77 Posts: 142
    I spose thats why i am a guys girl..always fit in better with the dudes..

    Same here. I have always gotten along better with guys. So much so, my husband's best friend calls me "bro". LOL
  • mjc65
    mjc65 Posts: 58 Member
    Now that I have made myself sound completely socially inept.....I sent you a friend request! :)

    It's not social ineptness - it's social astuteness to be able to spot the collectors from the people who will stand by you when you are at your lowest.
  • I am just picturing the whole lot of us sitting in a room together, staring at our toes!
  • mjc65
    mjc65 Posts: 58 Member
    I am just picturing the whole lot of us sitting in a room together, staring at our toes!

    Standing because no-one would be willing to be the first one to sit down... :)
  • heyghoge
    heyghoge Posts: 153 Member
    I am just picturing the whole lot of us sitting in a room together, staring at our toes!

    Standing because no-one would be willing to be the first one to sit down... :)
    things might get a little more lively if we run out of wall space and have to fight for it rather than hang out in the center of the room :laugh:
  • kathymr23
    kathymr23 Posts: 2 Member
    Wow! When I started reading the first paragraph, I thought I had written it but couldn't remember when! That is exactly me. Thanks for sharing.
  • I am just picturing the whole lot of us sitting in a room together, staring at our toes!

    Standing because no-one would be willing to be the first one to sit down... :)
    things might get a little more lively if we run out of wall space and have to fight for it rather than hang out in the center of the room :laugh:

    Hhahaha, both of the above! But then I'd have to initiate something, because that's what I usually do when I see no one else will!
  • Carita79
    Carita79 Posts: 64 Member
    I spose thats why i am a guys girl..always fit in better with the dudes..

    Same here. I have always gotten along better with guys. So much so, my husband's best friend calls me "bro". LOL


    Haha thats awsome! my bf's coworkers all call me dude.or bro-chacho!
  • WOW! This could have been ME writing this!! :happy:
    I have never made friends easily. since i was a child i have been a loner. I've had friends in my life, but it was fleeting and for the most part they were not nice people. I don't currently have any real life friends. my husband has friends in our neighborhood, and their wives are very nice people that i get along with, but we're not what i would call friends.

    i think my problem is that i'm not that girly. i don't like talking on the phone for hours, i don't even have a cell phone to text on. i don't like shopping, i hate shoes. the wives of my husbands friends all like to shop and gossip, and that's just not for me.

    i tend to be sarcastic. i don't share my feelings easily.

    i do listen well. i have great advice if needed, or i just have an ear if someone needs to talk. i do my best to be a good friend when i have the opportunity..

    i want to have friends. i want to be useful in the world.. i don't mean to scare people off, i just want to be honest.

    if i haven't scared you off, please feel free to add me, i'll do my best to be helpful.

    thank yo u
    et
  • Oh, singing to the choir here!

    I have ONE friend here in Canada, ONE in Texas (my two besties) and a few in New Jersey (where I am originally from). Otherwise, I can be friendly to people but just can't seem to form any real connections.

    I have been told that people think I am aloof or stuck up, when in all honesty, I am just SHY! I mean, stuck up? I have such
    low self-esteem that thinking I am better than anyone else is the last thing on my mind. Which causes me to fumble with what
    to say to anyone.

    I am not a girlie-girl in the sense of make-up, jewellry, fashion, shoes etc. I am not a tom-boy either, though. I am.....ME!

    I think I tend to hold people at a distance until I am sure of them, though. I mean, I have formed what I believed were true friendships and been stabbed in the back and dumped so many times that I am very cautious.

    Feel free to add me as a friend :) I will do my best if you will!!!

    Debbie
  • mommysews67
    mommysews67 Posts: 60 Member
    You soooooo sound like me. I would love to friend you because I bet that you and I would really understand each other.
  • jbescherer
    jbescherer Posts: 24 Member
    I learned a while back that you get what you give. I am not a girly girl, in fact my boyfriend teases that I have too much testosterone since I am happier fishing, tiling and doing typical guy things. I have also had careers that are male oriented ( Navy, Police Officer, Engineer) I'm not a huge shopper, usually because I don’t like to see my money fly out of my wallet! .. and when I'm heavy I hate everything I put on! (that is another topic ;-)
    Anyway I do have many friends however most have been accumulated since I grew comfortable with me and have taken responsibility for me and my choices. I realized that if everyone is pissing me off, it is not them, it is ME! I ask for constructive criticism when I am afraid that I may have come off wrong or be out of line and I use that to grow as a better person. But mainly I have started putting myself out there and I work really hard to be positive and not negative. This was not easy because I come from a back ground of complainers. So look at who you most admire and work to be like that person and list those qualities, after all if you look up to this person or these traits then you will feel better about yourself when taking on those attributes. Make small steps on being that quality person in all aspects of your life and love yourself for all your hard work.

    I’m here if you would like to friend me! I like to cheer on!!!
    And be cheered on!
    Best wishes to you!
  • Nicolee_2014
    Nicolee_2014 Posts: 1,572 Member


    i think my problem is that i'm not that girly. i don't like talking on the phone for hours, i don't even have a cell phone to text on. i don't like shopping, i hate shoes. the wives of my husbands friends all like to shop and gossip, and that's just not for me.




    Are you an Aquarian???

    I can't really relate to this topic as I've always made friends easily & it's not because I like shoes (I don't unless they are runners), I'm FAR from girly. I don't wear make up on a daily basis & doing my hair consists of washing it, brushing it & then throwing it in a pony tail. I hate talking on the phone because that is what I do for a job. I only go shopping when I absolutely have to BUT I have a lot of friends both from school, work & social situations. Surely you must like tv, movies, books, music something, anything that you might have in common with other people?

    Hopefully you can make some friends with similar interests/personalities because I could imagine life could be a little bit lonely at times, unless however, you enjoy your own company.

    Good luck :flowerforyou:
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