Unfriending MFP friends.

merrylea
merrylea Posts: 34 Member
edited November 11 in Motivation and Support
Hi all, I'm relatively new to MFP and I have a question: has anyone ever unfriended anyone? I have a pal that seems to be entrenched in food addiction. Their posts and food diary make me want to hinge, as I'm a food addict too. Quite frankly, they are demotivating for me, and I don't think I can do.anything for them. Anyone ever had anything similar?
«1

Replies

  • lmalaschak
    lmalaschak Posts: 346 Member
    I started out just having my husband and me. Now I only have like one or two other friends. I ended up unfriending a couple of people but it wasn't because they were bringing me down, rather we just didn't seem to have much in common. I thought they were fine people and everything though. Don't make it too personal...if you don't benefit from it then there's no reason you have to keep the friend. It isn't as though you don't like them...it's just not helpful to you.
  • KareninCanada
    KareninCanada Posts: 962 Member
    It's not Facebook. :smile:

    If you have friends who aren't on the same page, or are bringing you down, then you choose whether you want to try to influence them, or whether they need to go. Unless there is a way to just hide their posts from your homepage?
  • healthyliving_girl
    healthyliving_girl Posts: 290 Member
    Sometimes I unfriend people, but there is an option to "hide" people...so you are still friends but you don't have to see any of their updates unless you specifically go to their page...
  • Pandorian
    Pandorian Posts: 2,055 Member
    you can certainly hide them if you don't want to outright unfriend them. click to the right of any of your friends posts on your wall and you will see a "hide" button. If you go there on your own posts you see a "Remove" button

    If you hide them you can unhide in the future at "my home > friends" and look near their profile for an unhide or unmute button.

    All that said, unfriend them if they don't jive. I'm not on facebook due to the relentless "pointless" posts like "i'm deciding what to make for dinner, I'm cooking dinner I'm eating dinner, my dogs stealing my dinner... taking the dog for a walk'.... who cares.... and if someone uses mfp the same they go bye :)
  • beckylawrence70
    beckylawrence70 Posts: 752 Member
    I unfriend people who don't participate in logging food, exercise, or who have hidden diaries......or who never log on
  • MONI733
    MONI733 Posts: 12
    Let anyone and anything that is pulling you down go!! As someone stated this is not FB
  • tataliciousd89
    tataliciousd89 Posts: 465
    My rule is that if my friends behaviors on this site are not helpful and supportive and if they stop logging for 5 days or more, they are gone. Some friends I get and give comments to almost daily and I wouldn't delete them after only 5 days, but the lames that want to send friends requests, but never really talk to you again I get rid of pretty quickly.
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    I unfriend people fairly regularly. I'm mean like that.
    Actually, though, I only unfriend if we aren't really interacting, they haven't logged in for a while, or they are causing drama.
    I have a couple of friends who have definite food issues, but they are working hard on them and are open and honest about their desire to be healthier.
  • DannyMussels
    DannyMussels Posts: 1,842 Member
    One girl and her group of friends was staying under 250 calories or something.

    I wasn't feelin it.
  • Christine1110
    Christine1110 Posts: 1,786 Member
    For me...If people dont login with in a month I delete them. When I started on here you had a limit of friends you could have. I figure if they aren't really trying to lose weight I will make room for people that are.
  • mrmarius
    mrmarius Posts: 1,802 Member
    cut em if you have to, its about doing whats best for you
  • realme56
    realme56 Posts: 1,093 Member
    I de-friend folks who are not eating well, haven't logged in for weeks and such. I have one friend doing some weird diet and I have kept her even though I don't agree with folks eating less than 1200 calories daily. I need to eat now like I need to eat for the rest of my life, not a fad diet.
  • brittanidigby
    brittanidigby Posts: 247 Member
    I've deleted a lot of people. So do what ya gotta do. lol
  • 12skipafew99100
    12skipafew99100 Posts: 1,669 Member
    I unfriended once because her picture changed to practically all boobs and I did not want to look at that. I did tell her though. She then sent me a re-friend request with her standing behind a guy with a big smile. Its all good. I did not take her back though. Your peeps have to jive with you or whats the point? Its all about inspiration and support. If thats not there, move on.
  • elcieloesazul
    elcieloesazul Posts: 448 Member
    I've been un-added before, but before said person made it official, she commented on my diary that my post-workout smoothie recipes were weird. :laugh:

    I'll occasionally un-add someone, but only if they haven't logged in for a month or two.
  • lovelee79
    lovelee79 Posts: 362
    Hell yes !! I delete people monthly ! If they bring me down, or don't log, or hide their diaries, then bye bye !!
    DON'T feel bad about it. This is YOUR weight loss journey.
    :)
  • JoniBologna
    JoniBologna Posts: 653 Member
    This is your weight loss journey, and I think you are entitled to be as picky as you want when it comes to supporters. Don't feel too bad about it. I try to return the favor, and if someone deletes me...I assume they have their reasons, and I let it go. I definitely delete friends who don't provide support, who are losing weight in an unhealthy manner, who don't log in regularly, who are rude, etc.
  • Lobster1987
    Lobster1987 Posts: 492 Member
    Delete them. And don't feel the least bit bad about it. This is about YOU.
  • joconnor09
    joconnor09 Posts: 124
    i unfriended someone who i just thought was annoying. this site is all about you doing you. yes, there's a fantastic community aspect, but at the end of the day, you want to make this site a place where you want to go every single day. you've got to create an atmosphere you like, and if that means unfriending people, then so be it. they'll get over it, you'll get over it- there are plenty of people on this site. why settle for people who don't share your goals and motivation?
  • gbelltx
    gbelltx Posts: 142
    Hiding someone that does nothing but bring you down is like hiding that bag of chocolate you don’t want to eat. You know it’s there and but you keep going back one piece at a time.
  • MyFeistyEvolution
    MyFeistyEvolution Posts: 1,014 Member
    Absolutely. I've defriended people for lack of activity, negativity, no communication, and things even as characters I just don't mesh with. This is your fitness pal so feel free to make changes as you see fit. Sometimes people will get mad but trust me, they'll get over it. Such is life. I'm actually thinking about making a drastic cut myself to make sure all my friends are good supportive people that I can support back.
  • NeuroticVirgo
    NeuroticVirgo Posts: 3,671 Member
    I've unfriend people just because I had to many friends, because they didn't log in for 2 months etc... Its selfish, but sometimes if its overwhelming then it doesn't help me or them.

    The worst time I had though, was having someone on my friends list that was bulimic. I felt for her, I really did, but I just couldn't handle seeing her talk about bingeing and then puking everyday, and also not getting any real help. (Just trying to control her problem through MFP alone)...it was just to much, and I had to unfriend her.
  • chevy88grl
    chevy88grl Posts: 3,937 Member
    I unfriend people a lot.

    I've decided that instead of always adding people, I'll be more selective about who I add to begin with... I'm actually trying to stay around 50 friends (used to have over 400) because I feel like I don't really KNOW people if I have a ton of friends.

    The ones I have now? We all understand one another, know each other's goals and support one another.
  • capturingsmiles
    capturingsmiles Posts: 31
    I un-friended a person on mfp, it just seemed like every post and status update was about starting fights on the boards here and I couldn't deal with it. I just silently walked away.
  • Lyadeia
    Lyadeia Posts: 4,603 Member
    Delete them. And don't feel the least bit bad about it. This is about YOU.

    +1

    And the same goes for Facebook too. Not sure why you guys are all saying "this isn't Facebook" cause this applies on both sites for the same reasons.
  • RooChilders
    RooChilders Posts: 44 Member
    I just recently un-friended a couple people. One hasn't been on here for 5 months the other for 9. Don't feel bad about it. This is about you and you need others to help motivate! I have the best MFP friends! I could not do it without them. I am sad for the others but we all fall off the wagon from time to time and if they come back they can always friend me again...
  • Debbe2
    Debbe2 Posts: 2,071 Member
    Delete. Don't feel bad. Don't look back. It's about you. :flowerforyou:
  • InvidiaXII
    InvidiaXII Posts: 315 Member
    I recently unfriended someone because everything they posted was a whine and they seemed to be a generally negative person. Honestly, they were bumming me out!
  • Pebble321
    Pebble321 Posts: 6,423 Member
    Sure, if they're aren't helpful for you or don't seem like a good fit - unfriend away.
    This isn't high school (or Facebook!) and you are entitled to pick the "friends" who are a good match for you.
    I've deleted quite a few people - mostly because I have too many on the list and I try to keep it a bit more managable so I can actually have an idea of who they are and what they are aiming for.
  • lisakyle_11
    lisakyle_11 Posts: 420 Member
    i have defriended for very similar reasons you mentioned.... do stress about it. you are here for you and your support (to offer and receive).
This discussion has been closed.

Categories