not about weight..but about a creepy guy..advice please

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xoAmyxo
xoAmyxo Posts: 110
in Chit-Chat
so I have a problem..this isnt weight related at all. I live in a apartment complex ...its actually a house that was built into 7 little small apartments anyways..we get a new neighbor a few months ago..a guy..hes probably in his late 40s, everything was fine at first but now for almost two months i feel f*cked with by this guy but i want to know if im over reacting...Hes creepy first of all..girls you know what im talking about when a guy just has that creepy look & vibe to him..hes a drunk, i always see him with a beer in his hand & hes a loud mouth annoying person.

hes always trying to talking to me, hes always saying smart *kitten* **** to me...then the watching started happening..i will be outside and he will come outside to..he will just stand at his door way and watch me...he scares me..at night ill be walking up the stairs and he'll be some where i cant see him and scream BOO and ill scream and he starts laughing...he one time knocked on my door and was hiding behind the door where i couldn't see him..at night when i was home alone and i slammed the door & that really scared me.

He always comes outside when he sees me outside..he watches my exercise..i go up and down the stairs in the morning as a form of exercising and he watch's me do that..i have ignored him..i have rolled my eyes at him..he told my mom that i spit on him, when i never did, he did that the morning i rolled my eyes at him..i am 21 years old..this guy told me he dated a girl as young as his daughter, not sure why he told me this...

so after all this i looked to see if he does this to everyone..he talks to NO one else here..he ****s with no one else here but me.. there's a 23 year old girl that lives here..he doesn't even glance up at her..because at first i thought maybe hes just this way with everyone, but hes not..he only does all of this stuff to me....

what should i do? Im going to cuss him out next time he messes with me. I know that's not the best way of dealing with things but i cant take it no more and i hate even going outside anymore because of this man...is it okay for this guy to be doing this? am i over reacting? I wish he would just move away
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Replies

  • LilysMom28
    LilysMom28 Posts: 293 Member
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    I wouldn't cuss him out. Who knows how unstable he may be. Doing things like that just makes me nervous becuase you really don't know how ppl are. I'd mention all this to your landlord. Tell them you don't feel safe.
  • FireSwan
    FireSwan Posts: 170 Member
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    If it were happening to me, I would first start by checking to see if he is a registered sex offender or has a record.

    Speak with your landlord about what is going on, see if they can be of help.

    Not that the police can do anything because he is "creepy", but I would talk to my local police station and see what could be done - file a stalking report, have the police come out and check on you..not sure.

    I would also take a picture of him (a really good photo) give it to the police and give it to your folks. Make sure his name on it and any other information about him is on it.

    Do you have anyone that can come and stay with you for a few days? It might be a good idea to have someone else check this guy out. Make sure they get a good look at him and that he knows this person saw him.

    Maybe get a really, big dog and train the dog to attack only him! :noway:

    Hopefully, someone on MFP is with the police department and can give you some better advice.
  • xoAmyxo
    xoAmyxo Posts: 110
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    i know i shouldn't cuss him out but im just so fed up....& i deff. am going to talk to my landlord ..shes a women i hope she will understand..i just feel like maybe im over reacting..like boys will be boys? because i said this to someone and they said to not be so dramatic that hes just ****ing with you... not a big deal. but im scared, i hate going outside now
  • lumina0o0
    lumina0o0 Posts: 498 Member
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    talk to your landlord, and see if you can have a friend come stay over for a while esp if you have a guy friend that could be there.
  • EricNCSU
    EricNCSU Posts: 699 Member
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    Pepper Spray. Next time he jumps out at you give him a faceful.
  • JinxRita
    JinxRita Posts: 191 Member
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    If it were happening to me, I would first start by checking to see if he is a registered sex offender or has a record.

    Speak with your landlord about what is going on, see if they can be of help.

    Not that the police can do anything because he is "creepy", but I would talk to my local police station and see what could be done - file a stalking report, have the police come out and check on you..not sure.

    I would also take a picture of him (a really good photo) give it to the police and give it to your folks. Make sure his name on it and any other information about him is on it.

    Do you have anyone that can come and stay with you for a few days? It might be a good idea to have someone else check this guy out. Make sure they get a good look at him and that he knows this person saw him.

    Maybe get a really, big dog and train the dog to attack only him! :noway:

    Hopefully, someone on MFP is with the police department and can give you some better advice.

    This. Seriously. This guy is a creep, and you should maybe avoid being around him. Talk to your landlord pronto, and don't provoke this guy.
  • anta1
    anta1 Posts: 53 Member
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    Yes def talk to the landlord. If that doesn't work then MOVE!
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    File a written complaint with the landlord.
  • LilysMom28
    LilysMom28 Posts: 293 Member
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    i know i shouldn't cuss him out but im just so fed up....& i deff. am going to talk to my landlord ..shes a women i hope she will understand..i just feel like maybe im over reacting..like boys will be boys? because i said this to someone and they said to not be so dramatic that hes just ****ing with you... not a big deal. but im scared, i hate going outside now


    you can't trust that everyone is innocent these days. I know that sounds bad but you don't know this guy and to be a single girl living on her own you need to worry about your own safety. Better safe than sorry, right?
  • LaurenAOK
    LaurenAOK Posts: 2,475 Member
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    i know i shouldn't cuss him out but im just so fed up....& i deff. am going to talk to my landlord ..shes a women i hope she will understand..i just feel like maybe im over reacting..like boys will be boys? because i said this to someone and they said to not be so dramatic that hes just ****ing with you... not a big deal. but im scared, i hate going outside now

    If you're scared, then this is NOT okay. Normally gut feelings are right with stuff like this. If it's making you truly uneasy then you're not overreacting, I agree with everyone else: talk to your landlord.
  • nikki91950
    nikki91950 Posts: 647
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    have you ever talked back to him?
  • LilysMom28
    LilysMom28 Posts: 293 Member
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    Pepper Spray. Next time he jumps out at you give him a faceful.

    no kidding! I bet he'll think twice before messing with you again!!
  • FTIM2015
    FTIM2015 Posts: 460 Member
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    Thats not on at all Amy!

    I'm not sure how the law stands over there but in the UK he could be slapped with an ASBO (anti social behaviour order), although to be fair they don't do a lot.

    If your land lord can't do anything speak to your local police as it could be put down as verbal harrasment, and if he's making you feel unsafe and threatened then they should be able to do something, even if it's just a warning to knock it off or it'll be taken further.
  • purplegoboom
    purplegoboom Posts: 400 Member
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    As a single woman, one of the best things you can do? Get a dog. Get a really, really big dog. When my mom was living alone, her neighbors would try to take advantage of her, give her s*it, she's pretty sure one of them tried to break into her house.

    When she got her German Shepard, all of that stopped.

    Next, talk to the landlord.

    I second taking a picture of this guy and giving it to your parents, etc. That way if something does happen, they know the first person to go to, and they can keep an eye on him.

    Talk to the police and see what you can do.
  • RachelT14
    RachelT14 Posts: 266 Member
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    Bottom line is you are scared by him and his behaviour is very odd. You have a right to feel safe in your own appartment, you need to speak with your landlord so they have a record of what has been going on. Hopefully they will do something about it, and maybe there is absolutely nothing to worry about but it is always better to be safe. Good luck
  • Fattack
    Fattack Posts: 666 Member
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    You have been given plenty of sound advice. Definitely DON'T provoke him, and prioritize getting somebody to stay with you for a few days / notifying your landlord.
  • lumina0o0
    lumina0o0 Posts: 498 Member
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    Pepper Spray. Next time he jumps out at you give him a faceful.
    this too
  • bella_babe_86
    bella_babe_86 Posts: 503 Member
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    Pepper Spray. Next time he jumps out at you give him a faceful.

    THIS! As a female living on your own, you have every right to protect yourself against anyone who is bothering you. Maybe enroll in a self defense class as well.
  • xoAmyxo
    xoAmyxo Posts: 110
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    i have spoken to him....not about how hes making me feel though.i try to keep it short..but the past 2 weeks i ignore him and just keep walking and don't say anything..but hes still trying to speak to me..& doing the watching and all that. thank you for all of your advice.
  • nahralynn
    nahralynn Posts: 125 Member
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    i know i shouldn't cuss him out but im just so fed up....& i deff. am going to talk to my landlord ..shes a women i hope she will understand..i just feel like maybe im over reacting..like boys will be boys? because i said this to someone and they said to not be so dramatic that hes just ****ing with you... not a big deal. but im scared, i hate going outside now

    Do not listen to whoever told you to NOT over react. If you don't feel safe, if you feel afraid, then you need to do something about it. DEFINITELY talk to your landlady and ask her if she did a thorough background check on him. Do the picture thing, DEFINITELY do the pepper spray thing. I would go to the local police, explain the situation and ask about pepper spray and if it's something you should be worried about or what steps can you take to make sure this doesn't get to a violent situation. Sure there are creepy people everywhere but if you don't feel safe and this is the place you LIVE and he actually comes to your door to do those things, yes do something. You don't know if he is stable.

    Good luck.

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