Would you cheat? Part 2/rephrased

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  • BeautifulRedButterfly
    BeautifulRedButterfly Posts: 316 Member
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    o0o0 i love mint :D
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    I hate mint! Blech!!!
  • NessasMommy081311
    NessasMommy081311 Posts: 122 Member
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    I wanted the thread deleted because I was irritated with how it ended up being all about me, when that was not the reason for starting it. For anyone who I may have offended, I'm sorry, wasn't my intention at all. I was just looking for other people's views on appearances vs. love I guess....
  • angied80
    angied80 Posts: 749
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    I just want a cheeseburger...
  • SofaKingRad
    SofaKingRad Posts: 1,592 Member
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    Dang this thread is like the angry wrath of MFP!
  • Matt_Wild
    Matt_Wild Posts: 2,673 Member
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    This is no different to me as a question was asked about a large change in anyone behavior. Be it drink/drugs/lifestyle/gambling etc. If it significantly effects you and what you find acceptable, it is quite possible you will end things or indeed cheat. A lot of people move on by finding someone to move onto, cheating helps this.
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,887 Member
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    This is no different to me as a question was asked about a large change in anyone behavior. Be it drink/drugs/lifestyle/gambling etc. If it significantly effects you and what you find acceptable, it is quite possible you will end things or indeed cheat. A lot of people move on by finding someone to move onto, cheating helps this.
    Sad, but true.
  • psiren28
    psiren28 Posts: 530 Member
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    I don't cheat, I might stop being attracted to a person if they changed in an undesirable way but I'd either dump them or try and get them to sort it out.

    I got cheated on for a girl who was bigger and much less attractive than me. I know I know, there's no universal 'what's attractive' and we all have different preferences but man this chick was fugly!! Go figure :/ Weight / attractiveness has nothing to do with it. Some people just can't resist something different :/
  • Beastette
    Beastette Posts: 1,497 Member
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    I like. Big. ButtsandIcannotlie!

    Take that whichever way you like, yea or nay.
  • angieleighbyrd
    angieleighbyrd Posts: 989 Member
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    My husband weighs 2 pounds soaking wet, I'm the big one. But even if he were to gain weight, I don't condone cheating under any circumstances. I think if your relationship is at the point where you need to cheat, then you don't need to be in the relationship. Period.

    With that being said, my marriage has also been effected. Not because my husband isn't attracted to me. (I'm pretty sure he's blind, he would still see me as the supermodel even if I gained another 100 pounds) Because I don't find myself attractive anymore. I am not always interested in sex and I can't do as much as I used to being this big. I really don't like the way I look in certain positions and I don't like to take my shirt off at all. Has he thought about cheating? No. If he were that type of man, we wouldn't be getting ready to celebrate our 2 year anniversary.
  • _Christine_
    _Christine_ Posts: 1,388 Member
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    I like. Big. ButtsandIcannotlie!

    Take that whichever way you like, yea or nay.

    Yea!
  • kimoRUN
    kimoRUN Posts: 325 Member
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    Pretty sure most people would cheat on their spouses if they lost attraction to them AND knew they wouldn't get caught. That's the turn - whether or not you'll get caught. So, OP, if you're feeling insecure and not having sex or having fun while doing the sex, and your husband thought he could get some strange without anyone ever finding out, I'm sure he would.

    you said strange!

    Well what do you call it?


    um... strange.. no one else calls it that.. and for this.. i give you a high five!

    I thought a 'strange' was when you sit on your hand until it falls asleep and then use it to......errr nevermind.



    Did I hear someone was making a McDonald's run?
  • scott1080
    scott1080 Posts: 109 Member
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    Okay, so I have another thread on here that apparently is upsetting some people, so I am starting a new one and re phrasing the question....

    Does your significant other's weight affect how you are attracted to them? Do you feel you would be more attracted to them if they lost/gained weight? I am asking because I am married, have gained a bit of weight since we got together, and now am trying to get back to what I weighed when we met. I've seen how my weight gain has affected our physical connection in our marriage, and want to know if anybody else has this issue...

    i really dont know what to think my wife after 5 kids still look amazing and i remind her on a daily basis how sexy she is. she has never been over weight. i have gained about 70lbs over our 10 yrs of marriage. the past year or so i have lost 52lbs. you would think almost being at the weight when we first meet would spark some kind of intrest but seems to have had the oppisite affect. i have gotten less affection and attention since losing weight. its hard not getting the support you need from the person who you have given so much time and energy too
  • NeedANewFocus
    NeedANewFocus Posts: 898 Member
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    Most of this thread pretty much confirms what I've experienced. I noticed I became way less attractive to ladies when I was 70 pound heavier. I've been getting a lot more attention after the transformation. Kind of sad actually.....:ohwell:
  • rileamoyer
    rileamoyer Posts: 2,411 Member
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    bump for later
  • OneChanceOneLife
    OneChanceOneLife Posts: 26 Member
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    This is no different to me as a question was asked about a large change in anyone behavior. Be it drink/drugs/lifestyle/gambling etc. If it significantly effects you and what you find acceptable, it is quite possible you will end things or indeed cheat. A lot of people move on by finding someone to move onto, cheating helps this.
    Sad, but true.

    I agree with this but also have to say that there is a difference between love and attraction. People in general will always be attracted to healthier looking people but that shouldn't change how you feel about a person. If you love them, gaining a bit of weight shouldn't affect it. Of course at higher levels of weight increases (i.e. gaining 300lbs of fat) there is a change in this philosophy because the person you loved really doesn't exist any more. That person either stopped loving themselves by disregarding their own health or going through something mentally that is causing them not care about their own health. Some people work towards trying to find that person they originally fell in love with. There are two ways of doing so...helping the person or finding someone else. Nonetheless, there is always cheating which helps with the natural desires if you don't want to end things officially with the person you are with.
  • aprildawn81
    aprildawn81 Posts: 668 Member
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    Absolutely not.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
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    Pretty sure most people would cheat on their spouses if they lost attraction to them AND knew they wouldn't get caught. That's the turn - whether or not you'll get caught. So, OP, if you're feeling insecure and not having sex or having fun while doing the sex, and your husband thought he could get some strange without anyone ever finding out, I'm sure he would.

    you said strange!

    Well what do you call it?


    um... strange.. no one else calls it that.. and for this.. i give you a high five!

    I thought a 'strange' was when you sit on your hand until it falls asleep and then use it to......errr nevermind.



    Did I hear someone was making a McDonald's run?


    That's called "The Stranger".
  • Bahet
    Bahet Posts: 1,254 Member
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    I married a hot, fit, sexy, dark haired 29 year old. He married a hot, fit, sexy, dark haired 23yo. Today we are 42 and 48, both heavy, hair is grey (or dark thanks to Miss Clariol :wink: ), gravity has taken it's toll. His hair is thinning a bit. Wrinkles and stretch marks are in places that used to be smooth. Contacts have been replaced with bifocals. And I can say with every bit of honesty that I love him even more today than I did then. Anyone who says their love is based on looks doesn't understand the difference between love and lust. Love is just as strong when you are a wrinkly 80 yo as when you are a hot 23yo. Love is just as strong when the 6 pack abs turn into a keg. Love is just as strong when the washboard tummy has stretchmarks and can't be seen without lifting a saggy boob out of the way in the first place. Love is about how they make you feel on the inside, not what they look like on the outside.
  • Bahet
    Bahet Posts: 1,254 Member
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    As for attraction, I'm still attracted to DH and vice versa. Oh I'm sure he thinks Angelina Jolie is hotter than me. I think George Clooney is hotter than him. But if George showed up at the door and offered to ravage me I'd turn him down. Not because I wouldn't want to but because I love my husband and because I love him I have far too much respect for him, our marriage, and myself to ever cheat on him just because someone more attractive came along. That's pretty scummy in my book. There's ALWYAS going to be someone more attractive. If that means it's OK to cheat then don't bother getting married in the first place.

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