People who try to sabotage my diet!

Shedding weight is hard! -- I think it is jealousy at times

I've also had this happen to me even with people on here. "You're doing it wrong" "it's not sustainable" "you need to eat more" "you can eat ......insert food item" "how come you don't" "you work out to much" whatever it is everyone thinks they are a diet expert or a healt expert and somehow know your metabloism and every intereaction in your body when you consume any item. Funny thing is often the people giving advise are either in worse physical shape or are doing things you think are wrong. Nature of this beast. I eat the amount of food I can physically eat and I get the "you need to eat more" or "starvation mode" hmmm millions of Americans and millions of people worldwide who are heatlthy don't know anything about eating calories back or MFP and are perfectly healthy but thats a whole different story. I also hate some family members or friends who say oh you look fine, have a cheesebeurger or whatever. Cracks me up, yah I look fine cus i'm not having cheeseburgers with loaded waffle fries lol. I do eat non-healthy foods sometimes but not a lot. It's a personal preference for me. It's like telling vegetarians or vegans you are eating wrong , you don't get enough protein or you can't live off of veggies all your life. Obviously that's not true, maybe you can't live off of veggies your whole life but they might. Also people confuse eaiting healthy with me dieting.... I'm not on a diet what I eat is my nutritional diet not "dieting". I think people mean well but they sabotage you without concsiously knowing. Everyone if you're not asked for advice maybe you shouldn't give it. On the otherhand if you do ask for it expect that sometimes it will be contradictory or wrong or biased and those few times it might be "right".

Maybe some people see the amazing difference, and wonder how much better you could possibly look?

I had to drastically overhaul my diet April of last year because my cholestorol was through the roof and I was prediabetic. Almost everyone was very supportive, but to those that werent, I usually basically just told them that this was my lifestyle change, I wasnt asking them to change their lifestyle, so I woud appreciate them doing me the same courtesy and shrugged them off. Yeah there were some hurt feelings, but once youve said that once, you usually dont have to say it again. Btw, its been a year and I am still eating properly, so to the naysayers who said it wasnt sustainable...hahahaah to you!

Lol, being dairy and gluten free pretty much short circuits all that nonsense, but I can sympathize from earlier attempts to lose weight. I would definitely have that problem with my harley riding friends if I didn't already have dietary restrictions. Sometimes, (especially with salty foods) I take refuge in the old "my doctor will kick my butt" line. She would, she has me on some very specific dietary goals but I can eat anything I want other than that. Kind of fun when we go out though, I get a salad they get pizza and sometimes they are looking at my salad and saying, hey, I should have ordered that. Lol, lead my example, find the most beautiful healthy thing on the menu, or make or bring something cool to any get together and pretty soon they will be asking you how you can eat that way and be on a diet, lol.

I think we all know how this scenario goes lol
my hardest thing is eating out & making better choices on my order which I am happy to say I feel I do
we went to B-dubs last nite & I had 2 beers instead of 4 or 5 & I didn't order 24 wings with sauce like I used to do so I could have left overs I am so proud of myself for eating less & feeling fuller in the process

I've also had this happen to me even with people on here. "You're doing it wrong" "it's not sustainable" "you need to eat more" "you can eat ......insert food item" "how come you don't" "you work out to much" whatever it is everyone thinks they are a diet expert or a healt expert and somehow know your metabloism and every intereaction in your body when you consume any item. Funny thing is often the people giving advise are either in worse physical shape or are doing things you think are wrong. Nature of this beast. I eat the amount of food I can physically eat and I get the "you need to eat more" or "starvation mode" hmmm millions of Americans and millions of people worldwide who are heatlthy don't know anything about eating calories back or MFP and are perfectly healthy but thats a whole different story. I also hate some family members or friends who say oh you look fine, have a cheesebeurger or whatever. Cracks me up, yah I look fine cus i'm not having cheeseburgers with loaded waffle fries lol. I do eat non-healthy foods sometimes but not a lot. It's a personal preference for me. It's like telling vegetarians or vegans you are eating wrong , you don't get enough protein or you can't live off of veggies all your life. Obviously that's not true, maybe you can't live off of veggies your whole life but they might. Also people confuse eaiting healthy with me dieting.... I'm not on a diet what I eat is my nutritional diet not "dieting". I think people mean well but they sabotage you without concsiously knowing. Everyone if you're not asked for advice maybe you shouldn't give it. On the otherhand if you do ask for it expect that sometimes it will be contradictory or wrong or biased and those few times it might be "right".

I find it's one of 3 things:

1) they notice you've been working hard on your diet and want to 'reward' the hard work with 'something your doing with out'. I get that because I used to 'treat' myself to a snickers bar when I did well on my diet.... then I realized how self defeating that is because a snickers is full of really bad stuff. I know that's a common thing, especially among women. It's only when you start counting calories and can see everything that you understand. I now treat myself to things like nail polish.

2) They haven't dieted in forever and have NO CLUE how bad the stuff is they're offering you. When I found out I had high blood pressure and had to reduce my salt, I found it VERY HARD to be around my in-laws. They're VERY nice people, but they're from the South and just pile it on without realizing it. But we worked through it and they've adjusted stuff they make for family dinner night; like no more corn dog night and they don't salt the crap out of the mashed potatoes. They make it without and then once on their plate salt the **** out of it. But it was quite frustrating when you start.

Also my hubby says "lets go to Taco Bell" without understanding how much a 350 calorie bean burrito cuts into my 'numbers' as we call them. Some people just have NO CLUE what they eat.

3) They realize they need to diet and have no ambition to do so. This is the worst to deal with. Maybe try and offer them MFP and show them how awesome it is. Maybe they'll get off your case.

Either way, I know it's not the same but I took a lot of flack from people when I went vegetarian. I'd just turn and look them in the eye and say "it's what I want to do with my life. And that's that." and just walk away. 99% of the time that was the end of the conversation and it never came up again. Good Luck!

Please make sure you are within a reasonable weight range. The reason I say this is because many years ago, I was so fanatical about losing weight (not through healthy heating habits, though, rather through starvation) that I did not see that I was falling into anorexia. I saw myself as FAT and would get so angry at my family and "so called" friends who would tell me that I didn't need to lose weight and to have this or that "fattening" food. I finally woke up when my husband cried at the dinner table (no plate in front of me) saying that I was killing myself and he was afraid that I would leave him and our three young children. That snapped me out of it! Please do a reality check before getting upset with those who love you. If all is well within you, then just take the comments with a grain of salt (lite salt ;-)) and keep on going toward a healthy goal! Best wishes!

The only person who can sabotage your diet is you.

I think it is just one of those things, people will always do it and usually when they are trying to be well meaning. The only thing to do is pour light and love towards them, acknowledge they are saying it from love and ignore the hell out of them!


Sounds like you are all doing fab, inspirational :happy:

Threads like this make me sad. It must be hard to not have the support from those who matter most. I cannot even imagine how I would feel if those who said they loved me went against me and my desire to become a healthier happier person. I wish you all the best.

Don't mention diet unless you're willing to go toe to toe with the person about it haha.

I wrote a blog about this early in my journey ...this is something I still struggle with, but it remains frustrating nonetheless

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/kaetmarie/view/bon-voyage-sabateurs-158616#comments

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