Kids say the funniest things!

shawnscott5
shawnscott5 Posts: 295 Member
edited November 12 in Chit-Chat
So my little guy comes home from school today and he had not finished his lunch we packed him (morning kindergarten). So I told him to sit at the table to finish his lunch.

Me: Cyrus, you need to finish your sandwich and your gold fish crackers
Cy: (starts crying) I can't like those gold fish.
Me: Why?
Cy: Cause I hate them
Me: Why do you hate the gold fish?
Cy: Cause I lub them.

Your turn.....
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Replies

  • hennyben
    hennyben Posts: 313 Member
    My 3 year old: Mom what's 4+2?
    Me: 6
    3 y.o: Thanks, now I know everything
  • TexasGirl_Amie
    TexasGirl_Amie Posts: 215
    My 7 year old in the van yesterday (playing his ds and my sis flipping through my ipod stopping on a song he loves):

    "Ugh! Now I am going to lose my game because I have to sing!"

    hehehe
  • SnakeDarling
    SnakeDarling Posts: 352 Member
    Me: Caden... Don't worry about it. Boys and girls are just different, you know?
    8yr.Old Brother: Yeah. Boys don't have *motions to his chest*
    Me: What? Boobies?
    Him: Well... Dad does... But most don't!
  • KJVBear33
    KJVBear33 Posts: 628
    My niece who is 1 year old takes her father's credit card and says "mine, mine, mine...." LOL!!

    Nephew/Godson John says "I have a twestion...." (he doesn't say his C's or his Q's and has a hard time with saying "M's")

    Nephew Ryan when he was younger used to say "I no like it" when he didn't like something and also "blocking ours way"

    Ha ha!! Both boys LOVE "Moves Like Jagger" and know the words...........too cute!
  • shawnscott5
    shawnscott5 Posts: 295 Member
    Both the kids are learning to read (yes twins in the same classroom)

    Jericho: Daddy what does this word say?
    Dad: say the letters and you can read it yourself
    Jericho: (saying letters slowly) F I T
    Dad: now way the sounds all together
    Jerich: eff it

    I almost peed my pants on that one!
  • shawnscott5
    shawnscott5 Posts: 295 Member
    Me: Caden... Don't worry about it. Boys and girls are just different, you know?
    8yr.Old Brother: Yeah. Boys don't have *motions to his chest*
    Me: What? Boobies?
    Him: Well... Dad does... But most don't!

    Just choked on my rice cake!
  • onmyway31
    onmyway31 Posts: 66
    "Mom I never lie, but sometimes I could be telling the truth." lol my daughter told me this, she is 9
  • bmkx0
    bmkx0 Posts: 308
    My 3 year old: Mom what's 4+2?
    Me: 6
    3 y.o: Thanks, now I know everything

    hahahah
  • Elizabeth_M
    Elizabeth_M Posts: 562 Member
    Me: Caden... Don't worry about it. Boys and girls are just different, you know?
    8yr.Old Brother: Yeah. Boys don't have *motions to his chest*
    Me: What? Boobies?
    Him: Well... Dad does... But most don't!

    lol! Oh bless his heart!!
  • dsjohndrow
    dsjohndrow Posts: 1,820 Member
    My 7-year-old had watched our rabbits have a couple of litters last winter.
    Charlotte: Mom, how many kids did you have when I was born?
    Mom: Just you.
    Charlotte: Like there weren't more and you gave them away on Craiglist?
    Mom: No just you.
    Charlotte: That's weird, why only one?
  • paigemarie93
    paigemarie93 Posts: 778 Member
    Both the kids are learning to read (yes twins in the same classroom)

    Jericho: Daddy what does this word say?
    Dad: say the letters and you can read it yourself
    Jericho: (saying letters slowly) F I T
    Dad: now way the sounds all together
    Jerich: eff it

    I almost peed my pants on that one!

    Too cute!
  • w2bab
    w2bab Posts: 353 Member
    My son when he was 8 (he's 23 now): Mom, I don't know why you worry about your weight. You can always just get a bl*w j*b.

    Me: WHAT? What did you just say???? How do you know that word????

    My son (looking very frightened): You know. . . a bl*w j*b. Where they go in and suck all the fat out of ya.

    Me: OH. You mean liposuction. It's called liposuction.

    My son: Yeah, liposuction.
  • FluttershySweetie
    FluttershySweetie Posts: 216 Member
    One day I was cleaning and I dropped my mop, it hit the counter and sent a plate flying. My 8 year old son (4 1/2 at the time) then says to the situation: " That's some bad luck right there!"

    Love the posts here! Espicially the Dad with the mmhhmm's.... haha
  • FluttershySweetie
    FluttershySweetie Posts: 216 Member
    @ w2bab = OMG! That is awesome!!! LMAO!!
  • SnakeDarling
    SnakeDarling Posts: 352 Member
    My son when he was 8 (he's 23 now): Mom, I don't know why you worry about your weight. You can always just get a bl*w j*b.

    Me: WHAT? What did you just say???? How do you know that word????

    My son (looking very frightened): You know. . . a bl*w j*b. Where they go in and suck all the fat out of ya.

    Me: OH. You mean liposuction. It's called liposuction.

    My son: Yeah, liposuction.

    LOL! Too cute!
  • canroadrunner
    canroadrunner Posts: 203 Member
    My daughter would hear things and try to fit them into her experience of life which could be hilarious if they involved words she hadn't heard before.

    Once she came home and told me that her teacher had sneezed and she said Gesundheit, he replied that her donkey was insane.

    The best however was when Princess Diana had been killed in the car accident. She had heard it all day but her teenage brother had been sleeping (typical teenager) and missed the news. When at dinner, the subject came up, he exclaimed "Princess Diana is dead" and my daughter said "Yes, she was being chased by Pavarotti on a motorcycle."
  • _Timmeh_
    _Timmeh_ Posts: 2,096 Member
    My son when he was 8 (he's 23 now): Mom, I don't know why you worry about your weight. You can always just get a bl*w j*b.

    Me: WHAT? What did you just say???? How do you know that word????

    My son (looking very frightened): You know. . . a bl*w j*b. Where they go in and suck all the fat out of ya.

    Me: OH. You mean liposuction. It's called liposuction.

    My son: Yeah, liposuction.

    OMFG :laugh: :laugh:
  • korsicash
    korsicash Posts: 770 Member
    Mine woke up this morning and I say "good morning love and how did you sleep?" he looks at me and wrinkles his nose is disgust "none of your business".....It was too fricken funny I can't even be mad about it.
  • hennyben
    hennyben Posts: 313 Member
    My 5 year old daughter: Ohhhhhh I just wish I had boobies and was pregnant (:sad: )
  • saragato
    saragato Posts: 1,154
    My cousin when she was about 5:

    Emma: I'm the baby!
    Me (second youngest in the family by 14 years) : No way, I'm the baby!
    Emma: *looks me up and down then leans over to her mom* That's a big baby...

    Last Christmas:

    (she got a set of Monster High dolls even though she's only 7)

    Her mom: *brushing the werewolf girl's hair*
    Emma: NOOO! You're doing it wrong!
    Her mom: But I'm brushing it so the purple shows, see? *points to purple streaks*
    Emma: If I cut out those purple parts then will you brush it right?!
  • jdevrich
    jdevrich Posts: 25
    Asked my DS (4 yrs old next Monday) to take something upstairs for me the other week. His response, "I think I can arrange that!"
  • 2Grtkids
    2Grtkids Posts: 93
    My son when he was 8 (he's 23 now): Mom, I don't know why you worry about your weight. You can always just get a bl*w j*b.

    Me: WHAT? What did you just say???? How do you know that word????

    My son (looking very frightened): You know. . . a bl*w j*b. Where they go in and suck all the fat out of ya.

    Me: OH. You mean liposuction. It's called liposuction.

    My son: Yeah, liposuction.

    AWESOME!!
  • jdevrich
    jdevrich Posts: 25
    Oh and...Last night I had on a tank top and was about to go walking outside. DS said I couldn't go out like that b/c my shirt would fall down and then people would be looking at my boobies...
  • comet_wow
    comet_wow Posts: 180 Member
    Omg these posts are sooo funny.

    My nephew when he was around 3 came running into the house shouting "look mummy I can w*nk! I can w*nk!" She turned quickly to look at him frantically closing one eye...you mean you can wink Jonathan. Hahaha

    My younger daughter was always getting her words mixed up...the letterbox was the chatterbox, the glove compartment was the glove department etc

    My older daughter when she was around 7 was walking with me in the town, there was noone else around except a couple of army guys in full uniform walking in front of us. All of a sudden she gave a wolf whistle which would put a builder to shame. They both turned round and just gaped at me. I was so embarrassed I couldn't even explain it was her and not me :)
  • CharityPearce
    CharityPearce Posts: 215
    My 18 year old son this weekend in the vehicle with me - talking to my 15 year old son...

    "I'm going to be out chasing tail..." blah, blah, blah... "chasing tail" this and "chasing tail" that.

    Me: "WTF??? Shut up, you're totally grossing me out! I do NOT want to hear you talk about girls like that??? Are you crazy talking like that in front of your MOTHER???"

    My son: "What??? What does that mean, anyway???"

    Me (laughing and soooo relieved): "It means you're going after girls to try to get sex"

    My 18 year old son (totally red in the face): "OH! I heard it on Scent of a Woman. I thought it just meant trying to get girls"

    OMG! I told him he needs to know what he's quoting before he starts quoting. LOL. Little turd!
  • smae1980
    smae1980 Posts: 794 Member
    Mine woke up this morning and I say "good morning love and how did you sleep?" he looks at me and wrinkles his nose is disgust "none of your business".....It was too fricken funny I can't even be mad about it.

    I can just hear my daughter saying that! It's funny when kids hear a phrase and they understand the context, but they don't understand that it's actually not nice to say...can't help but laugh
    My almost 5 year old says "emn't" as in " I am (em)not" contracts to "I emn't". Don't know where she picked it up, but it must just be little kid logic because years ago I had a friend who had a daughter who was 4 or 5 at the time and she also said " emn't"
  • casey_when_u_go
    casey_when_u_go Posts: 83 Member
    My little guy asked recently "When dogs talk to each other, can cats understand what they are saying?"
    :laugh:
  • smae1980
    smae1980 Posts: 794 Member
    My daughter told me she was going to marry a particular boy in her preschool class when she grows up. I asked her why she wanted to marry him and she said because he had brown hair like hers. I asked her if he was nice to her and she said yes, i asked her if she thought he was handsome and she replied " Well, he might be when he grows up" !!!
  • susanmary88
    susanmary88 Posts: 37
    My 7-year-old had watched our rabbits have a couple of litters last winter.
    Charlotte: Mom, how many kids did you have when I was born?
    Mom: Just you.
    Charlotte: Like there weren't more and you gave them away on Craiglist?
    Mom: No just you.
    Charlotte: That's weird, why only one?

    haha! this is hilarious!!
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    Bump
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