im sad,need to vent

Keep your chin up! You can do this! On those days when I just feel like laying around, I put on my shoes. Then I keep talking to myself until I'm at the front door. I just force myself to go outside. Even if I have to make a deal with myself to just go around the block... or the parking lot.... and it usually turns into way more than that. When you feel yourself getting down in the dumps, just remind yourself of how you'll just feel worse if you let another day slip by when you don't get better. It's not going to come off magically, but you must have faith in yourself. I have faith in you. people here had faith in me and I'm well on my way to becoming a success story - in just 3 months!

You can do it.

You can do it.

You can do it.

You can do it!!!

its ok to feel bad (my therapist taught me that). the danger is when you start to mentally beat yourself up, the 'why can't i just get off my butt' 'what's wrong with me' 'i'm so lazy' thoughts. those don't lead anywhere except staying on the couch. so when you start to beat yourself up, stop it! watch a funny movie, listen to your favorite song, something that makes you feel good inside. then its a little easier to get off the couch:flowerforyou:

one day at a time...

I absolutely understand your feelings. It's hard! And it's beyond frustrating. I'm married to a tall, skinny man and he loves me no matter how I look as well. It's comforting, but I know I have to keep fighting not only for my sanity, but for my health. Just keep thinking positive thoughts. I know it's hard on days like that, but FORCE yourself up and take a walk, you'll be surprised how much it'll help. Hope you feel better tomorrow

I recently saw this really good lecture on google video of a college professor - his last lecture to both his colleagues and his class. He is a terminal cancer patient, and will likely not make it more than a few months from now. One of his key points is this - brick walls... any obstacle really... they don't exist to stop you. They exist for you to show both the world, and yourself how bad you want it. Don't get disheartened, get motivated. You will do it.

I know how you feel. I have been bigger all of my life, but at a high of 310 pounds when I was 23 (Yeah, that is no fun) I decided to lose it all. I lost down to 195 pounds which is sickly for me. I started lifting weights and gained 20 pounds in about a month. For about 3 years I was ripped out, and looked and felt great. When I met my ex-wife I lost all motivation to maintain my weightloss and also got promoted to detective. A desk job + stressful work = 80 pounds gained in a little over 5 years. It wasn't until last year I finally motivated myself to try again, but to do it the right way this time. It was hard, as all of you know, but 1 pound lost is one pound of motivation. Just keep at it, as my brother once told me on a very dark day in my life: 'One Day from today is just one day, but add 7 of them and it's a week, and that's one week that you didn't think you could make it. After that, it's one more, then one more, then one more, and before you know it has been a month...and after that two months, and after that three months.'

It's all about the end goal. So many times I want to eat something bad for me, but if I can just manage to walk away and do something other than eat it, and make it to the next day...well then...the next day it doesn't matter that I didn't eat that chocolate chip cookie dough...cookie dough that is calling my name as we speak...mmm cookie dough....

oh, sorry, zoned out there for a minute....anyway, just take it day to day. Heck take it minute by minute if you have to. You totally have it in you to change your life. Take ahold of it! It's powerful! Like Mr. T powerful!!! (And that's powerful!) :bigsmile:

-J

i feel like that alot too and my bf likes to call me fat all the time, but i just keep my chin up and tell myself im gonna loose the weight and then i work out. i used to be really lazy but since i started working out i feel good about myself even when someone is putting me down.

I know this is a bit of a threadjack, but...that really grinds my gears (that's North Carolina for gets me hot under the collar...aka makes me :mad: ). I don't know your bf, but sounds to me that the dude needs to step back. Just so you know, I think you are quite pretty, the last thing you need to hear is some disparaging comment from some two bit punk. :explode:

Sorry, for the outburst, just some people really make me ill.

Natashav, you're a beautiful person, don't let him or anyone else get to you.


-Jeremy

I know those days I have them a lot but I keep on fighting because some day I will win . and the fat will lose and I will look good to me the one that is always looking.SO YOU HANG IN THERE OK...

i feel like that alot too and my bf likes to call me fat all the time, but i just keep my chin up and tell myself im gonna loose the weight and then i work out. i used to be really lazy but since i started working out i feel good about myself even when someone is putting me down.

I know this is a bit of a threadjack, but...that really grinds my gears (that's North Carolina for gets me hot under the collar...aka makes me :mad: ). I don't know your bf, but sounds to me that the dude needs to step back. Just so you know, I think you are quite pretty, the last thing you need to hear is some disparaging comment from some two bit punk. :explode:

Sorry, for the outburst, just some people really make me ill.

Natashav, you're a beautiful person, don't let him or anyone else get to you.


-Jeremy

Jeremy is right. I can't imagine my bf saying that to me. Maybe he doesn't understand that but respect is the most important thing in every relationship. Remember about it, Natasha. Talk it over with him and think if you want to be treated that way all your life.

Sorry if I touched your private life but I think it's unfair :flowerforyou:

And don't diet for any man in the world! You do it for yourself - to be healthy! :flowerforyou:

One thing i have to say is, do this for YOURSELF, not your husband, not your parents, not the neighbor, only YOU !!!

when i started this i didnt even tell my bf because i know his gut reaction would be, ho dont make yourself miserable, i dont care what you look like.... but i do care what I look like, and most of all, i care about being healthy. now that i lost nearly 25 pounds. and its starting to show. hes quite impress and hes actualy started up with me.

It think we all had rude people in our life, people that are very close to us, as i kid, (maybe 5 or 6) i was always told that i was big, fat, by my family, my mom took me to the doctor and the doctor told her i was fine, and one day she mesured my tights and compared them with hers and said, my gosh, yours are as big as mine. so that stuck to my head, i was fat, and that situation continued well within highschool so my eating got worst and worst, when i moved out of home it was worst, and got the 220 pounds. not that long ago, i pick up a family album and looked at pictures to realized that i was normal, not fat at all !!!!!!!!! i had kept my highschool uniform and it was a size 10 !!!!!!!!!! so all that time that i though i was fat, it was my mom fear of me being fat that got me, now dont get me wrong, it doesnt excuse my eating habits..lol

sometimes, even though you are deeply in love with someone, its better to take a step back and think about you. it doesnt mean that you love him any less. .. just do it for you

im only 28 and i am fat . i have been with my husband for 14 years we have grown together in size among other things. i love him to bits but he just dosent get my struggle he has not gained as much as me but he seems to like my size! i love him for that unconditional love but it makes him hard to talk to about my feelings ,i go bac and forth today was a horrible day i felt fat and nasty all day and oddly enough those are the days i eat more but according to the calculator i went over by 180 calories and i thought it would be way more than that.i didnt do anything today though but sit on the couch and feel sorry for myself. i just need to know there are ppl out there who do understand i dont wanna be a model i just want to be able to buy clothes that "Omar the tent maker "didn't have to sew you know

I understand where you are at completely. I was always a big girl but when I got married I put on an extra hundred pounds. My husband always loved me just the way I was and never asked me to change. I would have days where I did nothing but sit at home crying and feeling sorry for myself. Then the day I had to say goodbye to my nephew to come back to NC I was scared I would never see the baby again. Then on the plane I had to sit next to a man that had to keep his feet in the isle cause there was not room for me and him both. That night when I got to my hotel I walked out of the bathroom and caught a glimpse of my naked body in the floor length mirror. I was horrified and I thought to myself , "My husband has to see this everyday, that poor man". The next time I had a day that I wanted to feel sorry for myself and cry all day I got my butt in gear and got off that couch to go for a walk. Not just because I loved my Husband and the baby but cause I finaly loved myself. Though My husband never complained and seemed to like me the way I was before he is now seeing the weight loss and making comments about it. He even goes to the gym with me every night now (something he would not do before). So you keep your chin up and make the decision that you want to live for you also. On the days you want to sit around and have a pity party take yourself to the gym and work it out. I find it difficult to feel sorry for myself when I am working out.



Raynel

When I met my husband I weighed 138 lbs. Fast forward 6 years later I found myself at 207 lbs. I am now down 22 lbs and on my weigh back to the wonderful world of feeling good. If I can do this YOU CAN DO THIS!

I understand what you are going through, i myself am hating myself today cause im so big. And its not helping reading some of the forums about people obsesing about fat they have when they weigh 110 pounds. Feeling like i should just say to heck with it, why bother. BUT i am hoping i can get outa this mood i am in right now before i acually do say it

my husband doesn't ever say a thing about my wight either way. He wont even say anythign when i tell him ive lost 18 pounds in the last 10 and half weeks LOL. I get mad cause he doesnt say great job but in my heart i know it is cause he loves me for who i am not what i look like and wont ever prolly say anythign even once i get thiner.

i feel like that alot too and my bf likes to call me fat all the time, but i just keep my chin up and tell myself im gonna loose the weight and then i work out. i used to be really lazy but since i started working out i feel good about myself even when someone is putting me down.

I know your probably to young to understand this, but I am going to try to help you to understand that your boy friend is verbally abusing you. It doesn't take someone hitting you with their fists to be called abuse. Like the gentleman told you before me, this boyfriend of yours is a looser and he will try to make a looser out of you to drag him down to his level and make you feel beaten down so he has the control of you and then you don't think you deserve better. You put your chin up young lady and get yourself a winner, I am old enough to know that if you were to marry this guy he will only continue, you can't change him and he will be that way to your children. You are a very beautiful girl with a loving spirit , if you stay with him , someday you won't be able to hold your chin up. You have the power to make your own destiny and it should be full of love and friendship , kind and loving words as God intended for you. Lose the weight and Lose the Looser You'll feel much lighter. You can mail me if you want, any time. Didn't that sound nice for that gentleman to tell you how beautiful you are. Well you should hear that everyday. Because you are!!!