Homeless.. Ethical straw poll here. Thanks x
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Personally, i think you did the right thing.
But, we have had a lot of pan-handlers in our area and if i could i gave them money. My husband always told me not to but i did it anyway. Then there was an article in the paper about how a lot of them have been coming over from a neighboring state because they do so well over here. They all have jobs but take the day off of work to pan-handle here. They car pool over.
I stopped giving them money. Makes me mad though because i am sure some of them really do need help, but it is hard for us to know the difference.0 -
You should know what you did was right? Obviously it's a good deed to give a homeless man food and toiletries. Sorry if I sound rude, but it sounds like you need to share this just for attention for people to be like "Yeah, go you!" instead of being self satisfied in the act itself. If this is not the case, ignore this post.0
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You should know what you did was right? Obviously it's a good deed to give a homeless man food and toiletries. Sorry if I sound rude, but it sounds like you need to share this just for attention for people to be like "Yeah, go you!" instead of being self satisfied in the act itself. If this is not the case, ignore this post.
My question was more around whether you should give money or food and generally about what others do. Interest really and also (did you read the thread?) as I am a vulnerable person myself perhaps more to guage whats OK and how not to get swindled. As the person is also quite literate I also wanted advice on how to approach trying to help further. Whilst the comments from others were nice, they werent necessary, but I suppose its only normal to say them, then followed by their comments of what they do. Interestingly you only seemed to have quite negative things to say and nothing of use to add to the thread. Assumption is not a nice trait, I do not like to be negative at all and wish you only the best, as I have been quite publically attacked though its only correct to let you know that wasn't the case.
Have a great day, I will, there were sevaral personal messages to say people were now going to help those in their area that hadn't before I posted.
Lucy x0 -
well done, i think some people should be made to walk an mile in another mans shoes, just to see how difficult life can be, before they decry another for a kindly act such as yours. i will be sorting through our wardrobes soon and donating the clothes that are good enough to the local salvation army shelter, you are an inspiration0
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You should know what you did was right? Obviously it's a good deed to give a homeless man food and toiletries. Sorry if I sound rude, but it sounds like you need to share this just for attention for people to be like "Yeah, go you!" instead of being self satisfied in the act itself. If this is not the case, ignore this post.
I hope you're proud of yourself with the above comment. You've just upset a thoroughly decent human being - she was genuinely interested in other people's opinions and not attention-seeking and I'm sorry you're not capable of spotting the difference.0 -
When my husband and I commuted to NYC to work we encountered a number of homeless men. One was a Vietnam vet, and my husband being a Nam combat vet, bought him a coffee and egg sandwich nearly every morning we saw him outside of a deli on 19th St. Oftentimes when he accepted the food he stayed curled up and hidden in his blankets, only his ragged arm and hand reaching out. Then one day he was gone. I think he was in really bad shape. We fed another homeless man and his dog around Union Square park. He had about three shopping carts neatly organized and packed, tied together. He dressed his dog according to the weather. In the winter his dog would be dressed in layers -- turtleneck, and down like ski jacket, or a warm hoodie in the early spring. If it rained he held the umbrella over his dog without any regard to getting soaked himself. I think a number of people were looking after him. One summer his dog develop developed benign tumors on his underside, and by Autumn they had been removed.
Feeling and acting compassionately is not being a sap. It's being a good soul.0 -
When my husband and I commuted to NYC to work we encountered a number of homeless men. One was a Vietnam vet, and my husband being a Nam combat vet, bought him a coffee and egg sandwich nearly every morning we saw him outside of a deli on 19th St. Oftentimes when he accepted the food he stayed curled up and hidden in his blankets, only his ragged arm and hand reaching out. Then one day he was gone. I think he was in really bad shape. We fed another homeless man and his dog around Union Square park. He had about three shopping carts neatly organized and packed, tied together. He dressed his dog according to the weather. In the winter his dog would be dressed in layers -- turtleneck, and down like ski jacket, or a warm hoodie in the early spring. If it rained he held the umbrella over his dog without any regard to getting soaked himself. I think a number of people were looking after him. One summer his dog develop developed benign tumors on his underside, and by Autumn they had been removed.
Feeling and acting compassionately is not being a sap. It's being a good soul.
You made be smile!!!:happy:
That is awesome especially for a vet, there should be more people like the ones who can see past their noses and help out others who are down on their luck. With the economy in the toilet it could be anyone of us sitting on those streets, hoping for at least one person who can make a difference in their lives.
You and your husband should be proud of what you did and I want to thank you.
I can only hope others can make an effort to share their kindness and open their eyes to the economical problems we have, instead of judging those less fortunate.
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Homeless what do you do? Theres a homeless chap in my town, keeps himself out of touble to my knowledge and if I have the change I give it to him but don't if I can't afford. Thing is today (he's on the way to my supermarket) I asked if he'd like anything or my change on the way back and, bless him he asked for a sandwich and something for his dog, so, I get him that and some vitamins, chocolate, juice, fruit and sime wet-ones (kinda figured its hard to feel clean on the street). Morally I am now struggling as what if he spends his money on bad stuff, but then surely its better to know he's, eaten. Am I a sap? What would you do? Im interested....ps, two years ago my life was so out of control it could have become me, so maybe I am a soft touch, but don't hold any punches.
I haven't read through the entire board, but here is what I have always thought (and what my pastor has reinforced)...It's not my responsibility to worry about what someone in need does with his/her money, provisions, etc. That is on them. If I give someone on the street $20 and they go and buy drugs with it, that's on them. That is their integrity, not mine. If I feel like I am supposed to give someone something, but withhold that for fear that they may abuse my gift, that's on me. I have to be faithful to who I am. It breaks my heat when I see people in need. I don't always feel like I am supposed to give to them, but when I do, I give out of love, and simply bless them. What happens next, is out of my hands.
I think you did an amazing thing for this man, and I'm sure that he appreciates it immensely!0 -
When my husband and I commuted to NYC to work we encountered a number of homeless men. One was a Vietnam vet, and my husband being a Nam combat vet, bought him a coffee and egg sandwich nearly every morning we saw him outside of a deli on 19th St. Oftentimes when he accepted the food he stayed curled up and hidden in his blankets, only his ragged arm and hand reaching out. Then one day he was gone. I think he was in really bad shape. We fed another homeless man and his dog around Union Square park. He had about three shopping carts neatly organized and packed, tied together. He dressed his dog according to the weather. In the winter his dog would be dressed in layers -- turtleneck, and down like ski jacket, or a warm hoodie in the early spring. If it rained he held the umbrella over his dog without any regard to getting soaked himself. I think a number of people were looking after him. One summer his dog develop developed benign tumors on his underside, and by Autumn they had been removed.
Feeling and acting compassionately is not being a sap. It's being a good soul.
You made be smile!!!:happy:
That is awesome especially for a vet, there should be more people like the ones who can see past their noses and help out others who are down on their luck. With the economy in the toilet it could be anyone of us sitting on those streets, hoping for at least one person who can make a difference in their lives.
You and your husband should be proud of what you did and I want to thank you.
I can only hope others can make an effort to share their kindness and open their eyes to the economical problems we have, instead of judging those less fortunate.
Well, thank you. I think the OP opened the door with this thread and many people stepped through, showing their compassionate side, and/or reflecting on those who are on the periphery of our respective societies.0 -
I'm probably way more judgmental than I should be when it comes to this... mainly because I believe being homeless is a CHOICE. There are so many programs (even though I may not agree with the way our government subsidizes those who take advantage) available that they could absolutely have a place to live if they made the effort. I also believe that once they did that... they would then have a much better chance of finding employment as well.
I'm not saying I'm right by any means... because I don't know these individuals or their circustances. I just know that in the back of my mind I'm thinking, "If I give this guy money, he's going to the liquor store". *sigh* It's definitely a moral dilemma.
Yes, many people take advantage of our government's programs. They are the able-bodied, sitting on the porch, getting a government check type of people. Too many are doing nothing except collecting the benefits that we are paying for. However, homelessness is NOT a choice! People have lost their homes through no fault of their own. They have lost their jobs when their company has downsized, closed, or sent all of the jobs overseas.They have lost everything if a family member becomes ill and they don't have the insurance to pay for it. They try to get some of these benefits that they should be eligible for, and are turned down.
There are thousands upon thousands of our veterans, the ones who have given their lives for the freedoms we have in this country, who are HOMELESS!! Do you think this was their choice? They, of all citizens, should be receiving help for their situations, but are tossed out on the street. There are so many challenges these vets have, such as PTSD, and physical disabilities as well, received when they were serving this country.
We have bought cups of coffee, food, and given money to the homeless. Anyone who helps these people in any way are blessed, they are compassionate. "I was hungry, and you gave me food; I was thirsty and you gave me drink; I was naked and you clothed me". Yes, this world should be a do unto others.
Thank you - extremely well said0 -
You should know what you did was right? Obviously it's a good deed to give a homeless man food and toiletries. Sorry if I sound rude, but it sounds like you need to share this just for attention for people to be like "Yeah, go you!" instead of being self satisfied in the act itself. If this is not the case, ignore this post.
Wow, really? If your world view has truly become that cynical, I feel sorry for you.
To answer the original question, I know it's a lot harder for men to get help with housing in the UK since they're low on the priority list, and with the economy as bad as it is, it's also quite difficult to find work. Maybe I'm being scammed sometimes but so long as I'm not aggressively pursued for my money (that's happened in the past, not very nice) and I've got change on me, I'm happy to help.0 -
if i see someone that is homeless i buy them food. i never give money personally but thats just me. i had a time once when a "homeless man" asked for a sandwich and coffee, when my sister and i ran to the store just across the street to get it for him and come back he wasnt there, we looked for about an hour and gave up. to this day i think he was a fake personally. i also help out at the soup kitchen or with my churches donation places instead so i know it goes to people really needing.
there was a thing on the news that showed the average panhandler around here made 200 + dollars a day (plus meals and other things that some pawned later) and they secretly followed some home and many lived in homes, with cars etc. nice ones too so now i just give food and clothing etc :-)
You sound incredible!! I'm training from July with my church to be a street pastor (do you have this in the USA?) to help in evening when people are weary and had too much alcohol and just need support.
He really does look poorly, I truly hope I'm not being repeatedly swindled, and I am a bit scared by the follow them home thing.... Hm I'll speak with my minister tomorrow to get his advice.
I wouldn't worry about it too much. just for me personally i would rather give clothes, help, food, etc than money :-) that just hit me weird ya know?! i also do things through my church as well as have helped out at the soup kitchen in the past and secret santas for refugees and even went and helped clean up a place here that helps women and children escape not so great situations. it always feels good to help, people find all kinds of ways. I just like to try my hardest to make sure i am really helping someone needy and not someone taking advantage.0 -
I'm probably way more judgmental than I should be when it comes to this... mainly because I believe being homeless is a CHOICE. There are so many programs (even though I may not agree with the way our government subsidizes those who take advantage) available that they could absolutely have a place to live if they made the effort. I also believe that once they did that... they would then have a much better chance of finding employment as well.
I'm not saying I'm right by any means... because I don't know these individuals or their circustances. I just know that in the back of my mind I'm thinking, "If I give this guy money, he's going to the liquor store". *sigh* It's definitely a moral dilemma.
Yes, many people take advantage of our government's programs. They are the able-bodied, sitting on the porch, getting a government check type of people. Too many are doing nothing except collecting the benefits that we are paying for. However, homelessness is NOT a choice! People have lost their homes through no fault of their own. They have lost their jobs when their company has downsized, closed, or sent all of the jobs overseas.They have lost everything if a family member becomes ill and they don't have the insurance to pay for it. They try to get some of these benefits that they should be eligible for, and are turned down.
There are thousands upon thousands of our veterans, the ones who have given their lives for the freedoms we have in this country, who are HOMELESS!! Do you think this was their choice? They, of all citizens, should be receiving help for their situations, but are tossed out on the street. There are so many challenges these vets have, such as PTSD, and physical disabilities as well, received when they were serving this country.
We have bought cups of coffee, food, and given money to the homeless. Anyone who helps these people in any way are blessed, they are compassionate. "I was hungry, and you gave me food; I was thirsty and you gave me drink; I was naked and you clothed me". Yes, this world should be a do unto others.
While I agree MOST people are not homeless because they want that, there are some that do. Like that man in the news just a few months ago that inherited a bunch of money but said he liked being homeless. They couldn't even find him to give him the money for quite some time. :-) I however would rather have someone tell me no thank you than not help. I actually never carry cash anyway (i am horrible at setting down my wallet when there is cash in it. Luckily in Utah here I have had hundreds of dollars STILL left in my wallet when I went back to the store and someone had been nice enough to turn it in. I would rather help though and I wouldn't worry too much about it. Those little kits sound like a good idea! I may have to look into that. I don't see many homeless out where I live but when I go into the city it would be nice to have some on hand :-)0 -
Homeless what do you do? Theres a homeless chap in my town, keeps himself out of touble to my knowledge and if I have the change I give it to him but don't if I can't afford. Thing is today (he's on the way to my supermarket) I asked if he'd like anything or my change on the way back and, bless him he asked for a sandwich and something for his dog, so, I get him that and some vitamins, chocolate, juice, fruit and sime wet-ones (kinda figured its hard to feel clean on the street). Morally I am now struggling as what if he spends his money on bad stuff, but then surely its better to know he's, eaten. Am I a sap? What would you do? Im interested....ps, two years ago my life was so out of control it could have become me, so maybe I am a soft touch, but don't hold any punches.
Def not a sap. We're all living on this earth together and should care about every living being on this planet, within reason. There's a homeless guy near my work who I always buy food for.
Also, don't assume he spends the money he's given on bad stuff. Not all homeless people are drug addicts or alcoholics.0 -
Bless your heart
So kind of you to provide him with some basic necessities and food. My feeling is that when God puts someone in my path who is in need, it's my job to give what I can to help and it's not my place to question what they do with it. That is between them and God. That's my personal view... 0 -
I think you did the right thing. You can't worry about what he is going to do with money he gets. You are doing what you feel you need to do for society and are following your beliefs. You can walk away knowing you have helped someone even if it is just in that moment.0
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I think you did the right thing. Definitely keep on doing so when you're able.0
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FYI: the OP left Mfp due to this thread. She felt cut down by certain people. She is a genuinely good person who was bullied on this thread for her actions. Thank you to those who supported her and her actions.0
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FYI: the OP left Mfp due to this thread. She felt cut down by certain people. She is a genuinely good person who was bullied on this thread for her actions. Thank you to those who supported her and her actions.
I went to add her myself, and saw she deactivated. I was wondering why too. How sad
If you ever hear from her again, let her know there are people who appreciate her shedding light on a sad subject. Sometimes hearing of a sad story with some good helps bring awareness. Awareness is power. 0
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