How Dare You!!!!!

Options
24

Replies

  • NU2U
    NU2U Posts: 659 Member
    Options
    I'm so so sorry he did that to you! That should make you keep fighting even more! Maybe he doesn't want you to lose weight or maybe he is jealous?! Who knows but keep up the great work you'll get there too.

    OMG....I love your stomach...I wanna eat peanut butter off of it!!
    And I'm 100% straight....but wow!!

    See, I say wow wayyy too much :-)
  • butterfly10398
    butterfly10398 Posts: 176
    Options
    I understand wanting approval and even praise from people who are close to you... But I had to learn the hard way, you got to be proud of yourself, and thats all that matters... When all the weight comes off and you are healthy, he will finally start taking notice, but don't expect him to validate you or your efforts or accomplishments, because it may not ever happen... I went thru this with someone VERY close to me... And I had to accept it that they weren't going to approve... And just a little while ago I heard him saying to somebody else how good I had done at getting off and keeping off my weight. :-) Keep your head up and do what works for you...
  • chessie1971
    chessie1971 Posts: 7
    Options
    Based on your post, I can only guess what your friends motivations are; perhaps, he jealous or it is some control thing. Either way we can only assume and suspect. Have you been direct with your friend about your concerns? Have asked your friend why do you compliment everyone else but not me? Tell your friend how it makes you feel. This obviously bothers you and so you should talk to your friend about it or else it will become toxic in your relationship. If he can't talk to you then this could be cause for concern.

    15705196.png
  • TIDDYBEAR
    TIDDYBEAR Posts: 63 Member
    Options
    Do you have a Planet Fitness gym where you are? They are awesome! Their big claim is "judgement free". A place where ANYONE can go and be comfortable. They don't allow big grunting while lifiting weights. They have a commercial where a guy is showing off his 6 pack and is escorted out the door. I have seen bigger than me and smaller than me there. And it's only 10 bucks a month! Check it out if you can.

    Jan
  • NU2U
    NU2U Posts: 659 Member
    Options
    I understand wanting approval and even praise from people who are close to you... But I had to learn the hard way, you got to be proud of yourself, and thats all that matters... When all the weight comes off and you are healthy, he will finally start taking notice, but don't expect him to validate you or your efforts or accomplishments, because it may not ever happen... I went thru this with someone VERY close to me... And I had to accept it that they weren't going to approve... And just a little while ago I heard him saying to somebody else how good I had done at getting off and keeping off my weight. :-) Keep your head up and do what works for
    you...

    Thank you :-)
    And I know you're right..and I shouldn't let it bother me. But he constantly compliments people on everything....and it just friggin bothers me that he's just not that generous with the compliments with me.

    I'm not saying I need the compliments...but ONE unexpected compliment is very encouraging.
  • Articeluvsmemphis
    Articeluvsmemphis Posts: 1,987 Member
    Options
    maybe he likes you, and that's his man brain speaking, but good for you. keep at it
  • Articeluvsmemphis
    Articeluvsmemphis Posts: 1,987 Member
    Options
    Honestly,
    that diet looks like a bit of a fad diet. It looks like they are big on selling stuff like protein, whey, chocolate bars, mineral stuff, and books! Undereating during the day? Overeating at night? Hmmm... I have never heard of something like that before

    people will argue with you furiously on how meal frequency does not matter. check for people who do I.F.
  • Il_DaniD_lI
    Il_DaniD_lI Posts: 1,593 Member
    Options
    Honestly,
    that diet looks like a bit of a fad diet. It looks like they are big on selling stuff like protein, whey, chocolate bars, mineral stuff, and books! Undereating during the day? Overeating at night? Hmmm... I have never heard of something like that before

    who cares? She didn't ask what you thought of it. Did you read the part that says it's working for her? geesh.. get a life people.

    I agree that he wants you to be the fat one. He doesn't want you to steal his shine. He is not a very good friend if you ask me.
  • melhayes1115
    melhayes1115 Posts: 187 Member
    Options
    Forget him. People can be so negative. I'd much rather lose it slowly, that way you're more likely to keep it off. Great job with your accomplishments!
  • angjindra
    angjindra Posts: 77 Member
    Options
    Do What works for you and screw what everyone else says! Good luck! :)
  • NU2U
    NU2U Posts: 659 Member
    Options
    Based on your post, I can only guess what your friends motivations are; perhaps, he jealous or it is some control thing. Either way we can only assume and suspect. Have you been direct with your friend about your concerns? Have asked your friend why do you compliment everyone else but not me? Tell your friend how it makes you feel. This obviously bothers you and so you should talk to your friend about it or else it will become toxic in your relationship. If he can't talk to you then this could be cause for concern.
    15705196.png

    I've brought it up several times...even this morning..he just shrugs it off as if he doesn't give a crap. I will likely never even speak to him again after this episode. He really tore me down today.........and made me think evil thoughts :-/
  • butterfly10398
    butterfly10398 Posts: 176
    Options
    I understand wanting approval and even praise from people who are close to you... But I had to learn the hard way, you got to be proud of yourself, and thats all that matters... When all the weight comes off and you are healthy, he will finally start taking notice, but don't expect him to validate you or your efforts or accomplishments, because it may not ever happen... I went thru this with someone VERY close to me... And I had to accept it that they weren't going to approve... And just a little while ago I heard him saying to somebody else how good I had done at getting off and keeping off my weight. :-) Keep your head up and do what works for
    you...

    Thank you :-)
    And I know you're right..and I shouldn't let it bother me. But he constantly compliments people on everything....and it just friggin bothers me that he's just not that generous with the compliments with me.

    I'm not saying I need the compliments...but ONE unexpected compliment is very encouraging.


    Well as one MFP'er to another, let me officially say you are doing an amazing job and keep up the good work! :-)
  • NU2U
    NU2U Posts: 659 Member
    Options
    Honestly,
    that diet looks like a bit of a fad diet. It looks like they are big on selling stuff like protein, whey, chocolate bars, mineral stuff, and books! Undereating during the day? Overeating at night? Hmmm... I have never heard of something like that before

    who cares? She didn't ask what you thought of it. Did you read the part that says it's working for her? geesh.. get a life people.

    I agree that he wants you to be the fat one. He doesn't want you to steal his shine. He is not a very good friend if you ask me.

    I agree..I've noticed tho, since taking control of my appetite and being more mindful of what I eat....my mood and temper are more mellow.

    If I had still been feasting on cupcakes and crab ragoon all day...I may have responded in my former "Madea" kinda way........so thank God for my method of eating.....because that poster was spared a royal round of whoop *kitten*!! :-)

    I'm a warrior:-D
  • Reeny1_8
    Reeny1_8 Posts: 277
    Options
    Even though your friend has been there and lost weight and knows how hard it is, it sounds as though he is still unhappy. Whatever the reason he wants to bring you down too. Baby steps work! I used to try to plan things out long term and every time I did that I fell flat on my face! You have to learn to crawl before you can walk..etc. before long you will be running! Keep up the good work and be positive!
  • NU2U
    NU2U Posts: 659 Member
    Options
    I understand wanting approval and even praise from people who are close to you... But I had to learn the hard way, you got to be proud of yourself, and thats all that matters... When all the weight comes off and you are healthy, he will finally start taking notice, but don't expect him to validate you or your efforts or accomplishments, because it may not ever happen... I went thru this with someone VERY close to me... And I had to accept it that they weren't going to approve... And just a little while ago I heard him saying to somebody else how good I had done at getting off and keeping off my weight. :-) Keep your head up and do what works for
    you...

    Thank you :-)
    And I know you're right..and I shouldn't let it bother me. But he constantly compliments people on everything....and it just friggin bothers me that he's just not that generous with the compliments with me.

    I'm not saying I need the compliments...but ONE unexpected compliment is very encouraging.


    Well as one MFP'er to another, let me officially say you are doing an amazing job and keep up the good work! :-)
    Thank you:-)
  • NU2U
    NU2U Posts: 659 Member
    Options
    Even though your friend has been there and lost weight and knows how hard it is, it sounds as though he is still unhappy. Whatever the reason he wants to bring you down too. Baby steps work! I used to try to plan things out long term and every time I did that I fell flat on my face! You have to learn to crawl before you can walk..etc. before long you will be running! Keep up the good work and be positive!

    Thanks so much!! Xoxo
  • kanmuri
    kanmuri Posts: 112
    Options
    Stop feeling sorry for yourself and go back to doing whatever it is you do that works for you.
  • philOHIO
    philOHIO Posts: 520 Member
    Options
    he is NO FRIEND... find a REAL ONE!
  • pinn44
    pinn44 Posts: 68
    Options
    Can we say HATER!!!! Sounds like it was all good when you shelled out the compliments and now he's a little jealous. You know some people actually like it when you make them look better. At any rate, I'd share my feelings with him and see what he says. Then take his response and make a decision. If he's a true friend he will have a workable response. If not, loose the extra poundage....who needs it?
  • NU2U
    NU2U Posts: 659 Member
    Options
    Stop feeling sorry for yourself and go back to doing whatever it is you do that works for you.

    Thanks...I feel much better. That little spell I was goin through this morning....is sooooo over!!

    It's ki¢ka$$ time again!!

Categories