YOUR MOTHER IN LAW>>? PLEASE ENLIGHTen ME,,

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  • smsinger75
    smsinger75 Posts: 253 Member
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    My MIL is so awesome!! I love her so much! She is one of the best people I have ever met and it is truly a gift that she is in my life. She knows all the good and bad about me and still loves me. I know I can call her anytime and just talk about nothing in particular or ask her for advice. I trust her more than I do my own mom. If anything were to happen to hubby and I, our children would go and be with my MIL. No question! I just wish she lived closer. She lives in the next state and takes about 8 hours to get there. My FIL passed away a few years ago. Wish she would consider moving closer to us or just come for an extended visit. BIL and SIL also live up our direction. So if she came up here, she would be close to 2 out of her 3 children. But for now I enjoy the time we do get to spend together when we go to visit her.
  • MrsMrtz
    MrsMrtz Posts: 73
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    ....after much prayers, she's ok now.
  • chantel242
    chantel242 Posts: 2 Member
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    I haven't seen her in almost one year and I can walk to her house...
  • Grlnxtdr0721
    Grlnxtdr0721 Posts: 597 Member
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    It depends on the day, her mood, etc....Yea, suffice it to say she isn't someone I pick up the phone and call too often...
  • jcpmoore
    jcpmoore Posts: 796 Member
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    I loved my mother in law for the first 15 years I knew her. We got along great. Then she started to attack my husband. Now we don't get along so great.
  • livinginwoods
    livinginwoods Posts: 562 Member
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    Love her! Even when we don't agree. Family is family.
  • Jaloth
    Jaloth Posts: 28
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    My mother -in -law is the best!!! She looks after all of us!!!:wink:
  • BlueInkDot
    BlueInkDot Posts: 702 Member
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    My future mother-in-law is awesome. She's strong, knowledgable, honest and straight-forward. She tells it like it is and wears her heart on her sleeve. I love how genuine she is. I've always been able to talk to her very openly, especially once my fiance and I got out of the "teenagers-in-love" stage and into the "long term relationship" stage. Then she became more of a friend than a mom.

    Sometimes it gets a little difficult to talk to her just because she'll get wrapped up in something and has trouble listening to what I'm saying, so it's not like I can confide in her or whatever? But I'm glad I can be there for her and she can confide in me. So at least there's that. I'm just glad we're on good terms and I'm glad she's easy to talk to. Other people have much more disturbing complaints about their mother-in-laws! My complaints aren't nearly as serious. She's just the way she is. Nothing horrible. :P

    Oh and her cooking is AMAZING. Haha.
  • 99clmsntgr
    99clmsntgr Posts: 777 Member
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    For the most part I get along great with my in-laws. MIL is generally nice and kind-hearted but, like most MIL's has a couple of habits that drive me bat-**** crazy.

    Primarily is that she is the enabler in my in-law's house. My father-in-law is obese and is Type II diabetic and seems to have little to no impulse control. Yet the MIL has to have sweets (cookies, cake, cupcakes, you name it) in the house. And on top of that she's always buying sweets "to bring over" because there's not many in my wife and my house (there's a reason for that) and pushing sweets and food on my kids.
    Example - last weekend we went to see them. My wife's aunts and uncles were going to come over to see the kids before they leave to go back up north (they're snowbirds) so we decided to get together at the in-law's place for lunch since it was sort-of in the middle. We show up just before 11:00, family is supposed to get there between 11:00 and 11:30, we'll cook out as soon as they get there.

    MIL - I bought some cookies, do the kids need a snack?
    Me - No. No snacks right now, we're going to be eating lunch soon.
    MIL - How about some fruit instead? I have bananas and strawberries and watermelon.
    Me - No, we're going to be eating lunch in about a half hour, I'd like them to actually eat it when we do.
    MIL - Well, are you sure they're not hungry?
    Me - (inside voice is saying many bad words) I think they'll be fine.

    This was followed by, as soon as they finished eating lunch,

    MIL - to our 4 year old - Do you want a cupcake for dessert?
    Me - (relenting, she ate all her lunch, and I'm OK with her having sweets, but she's notorious for just eating the frosting and I hate wasting food...) Katherine, if you want a cupcake now, you don't get any treats later. And you had better not just eat the frosting and waste the rest of the cupcake.
    K - OK, Daddy, I won't waste it. (Katherine proceeds to just eat the frosting and throws the cupcake away ("I don't like it, Daddy.") :mad:)

    Jump ahead a few hours to dinner. We eat, everything's good.

    MIL - Katherine, there's one cupcake left, do you want it?
    Me - Remember how I told her that if she had one earlier she didn't get one now?
    MIL - Well, I thought maybe she'd want one...
    Me - Remember how I told her that if she had one earlier she didn't get one now? And how she wasted the last one you gave her? No cupcakes or any other dessert you may have stashed away in the house, she's had enough sweets today.
    MIL - Well, I thought she might just want something sweet...
    Me - **SCOWL** (which ended it, by the way)

    There is one other thing she does that drives me nuts. If we invite them over for holiday dinners we normally share the meal (we'll make certain parts, they'll make others), which I'm OK with. But what drives me insane, and some may not think this is a big deal but it makes me batty, is that she'll bring pots and pans and whatever utensils she thinks she needs to make whatever she's making because "I didn't think you had any." WTF!? I know I shouldn't let this one bother me, but it's pretty insulting (at least to me) when you don't think that your mid-30's daughter and her husband don't have anything beyond a dorm-room kitchen. I can understand her bringing some specific, exotic tool that you'd need to make something, but pots and pans? Baking sheets? Because you didn't think we had any? Really?

    </rant>
  • amymt10
    amymt10 Posts: 271 Member
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    I love mine!! She is awesome, always wanting to help. Especially when I was on bedrest w/both my pregnancies. She cleaned our house, did laundry and helped w/the grocery shopping and was always smiling. With the 2nd pregnancy she did all that plus help watch our 3yr old. She took me to my dr appts since i was allowed to drive and accompanied me to the hospital for a few emergency visits til my hubby got there. She is great w/our kids and will come get them when she needs a grandkid fix. She is just a very sweet loving lady, I lucked out!!
  • meglynne1987
    meglynne1987 Posts: 382 Member
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    She is nice.... in another state.... Works best for me.... :)
  • lovelyrose11
    lovelyrose11 Posts: 609 Member
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    Mine was amazing, sweet, wonderful until we had our son. It is her first grandchild and to say she has lost her mind is an understatement. She is trying to take over everything and it is like she wants to get rid of me so she can be his mother. It's very odd.
  • kapeluza
    kapeluza Posts: 3,434 Member
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    My mother-in-law is AMAZING. Really she is very kind, never bothers me and is really sweet to me every single time we see each other!
  • KitTheRoadie
    KitTheRoadie Posts: 641 Member
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    It depends on the day, her mood, etc....Yea, suffice it to say she isn't someone I pick up the phone and call too often...

    ^^^ THIS ^^^ accept I live with mine so don't have the option but to see her everyday! She's great though and we have the same interests which is good. It's the father-in-law I am the most scared of! :indifferent:
  • 2bFitNTrim
    2bFitNTrim Posts: 1,209 Member
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    Love mine! She said I am one of her daughters. She doesn't stick her nose in her adult children's business, but is there to lend an ear when needed. She is independent & strong. The woman is 80 yrs old, is health conscious & still works full time & is active. A role model!
  • just4peachy
    just4peachy Posts: 594 Member
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    My former MIL is a very judgemental, stab-you-in-the-back-in-the-name-of-Jesus kind of woman. Having her in my past made it difficult for me to trust my soon to be MIL in the beginning but I'm so glad I eventually did! My (nearly) MIL is one of the nicest, most genuine people I've ever met. She lives very close to us and has been a HUGE help since my guy deployed. I really don't know what I'd do without her.
  • coe28
    coe28 Posts: 715 Member
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    She was absolutely horrible. Ex MIL now, thankfully... :devil:
  • slparsaca
    slparsaca Posts: 59 Member
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    My mother in law disowned my husband when he married me lol I guess it really bothered her that I had boundaries and wouldn't let her control me. It makes me sad that he was put in the middle but it is what it is.
  • My1985Freckles
    My1985Freckles Posts: 1,039 Member
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    Mine is getting better than she used to be, but she still feels that she can control every aspect of our lives. We are not children and are capable of making our own decisions. I did NOT need help planning our wedding. I did NOT appreciate her complaining about our wedding until we changed it to please her. I did NOT want her to make my wedding cake, but because she used to do it for a living I thought it was a nice way to get her involved but out of my hair. I did NOT appreciate her calling me fat at my dress fitting. I did NOT appreciate her complaining to everyone who would listen that I made her plant 50 green pepper plants. Um, No I didn't! I don't know where she ever got that idea and last but not least I REFUSE to grow radishes in my apartment!!!!! Well, I don't live there anymore, but it didn't have a yard and she kept insisting that I should grow radishes in a flower pot inside. *sigh*

    But, she is getting better now. :-)
  • ♥Amy♥
    ♥Amy♥ Posts: 714 Member
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    MIL - I bought some cookies, do the kids need a snack?
    Me - No. No snacks right now, we're going to be eating lunch soon.
    MIL - How about some fruit instead? I have bananas and strawberries and watermelon.
    Me - No, we're going to be eating lunch in about a half hour, I'd like them to actually eat it when we do.
    MIL - Well, are you sure they're not hungry?
    Me - (inside voice is saying many bad words) I think they'll be fine.

    This was followed by, as soon as they finished eating lunch,

    MIL - to our 4 year old - Do you want a cupcake for dessert?
    Me - (relenting, she ate all her lunch, and I'm OK with her having sweets, but she's notorious for just eating the frosting and I hate wasting food...) Katherine, if you want a cupcake now, you don't get any treats later. And you had better not just eat the frosting and waste the rest of the cupcake.
    K - OK, Daddy, I won't waste it. (Katherine proceeds to just eat the frosting and throws the cupcake away ("I don't like it, Daddy.") :mad:)

    Jump ahead a few hours to dinner. We eat, everything's good.

    MIL - Katherine, there's one cupcake left, do you want it?
    Me - Remember how I told her that if she had one earlier she didn't get one now?
    MIL - Well, I thought maybe she'd want one...
    Me - Remember how I told her that if she had one earlier she didn't get one now? And how she wasted the last one you gave her? No cupcakes or any other dessert you may have stashed away in the house, she's had enough sweets today.
    MIL - Well, I thought she might just want something sweet...
    Me - **SCOWL** (which ended it, by the way)

    There is one other thing she does that drives me nuts. If we invite them over for holiday dinners we normally share the meal (we'll make certain parts, they'll make others), which I'm OK with. But what drives me insane, and some may not think this is a big deal but it makes me batty, is that she'll bring pots and pans and whatever utensils she thinks she needs to make whatever she's making because "I didn't think you had any." WTF!? I know I shouldn't let this one bother me, but it's pretty insulting (at least to me) when you don't think that your mid-30's daughter and her husband don't have anything beyond a dorm-room kitchen. I can understand her bringing some specific, exotic tool that you'd need to make something, but pots and pans? Baking sheets? Because you didn't think we had any? Really?

    </rant>

    Both of these incidents sound exactly like my life, except in the first one, my MIL would have just given my sons the cupcake and not asked in front of me. Then, even though I said no more, she'd have given them more. And yet she wonders why all of her family is completely overweight? (Not that 1 or 2 cupcakes would do it, but it's a CONSTANT thing)

    And we have the same situation with the cooking items, foods, etc. when she visits. In fact, she thinks she needs to cook here because she says that I don't know how. Hello, how do you think the 4 of us eat our 3 meals each day??? Because I cook them! And apparently we have the cooking supplies and foods necessary to do that.

    UGH! OK, sorry for my rant too!

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