People trying to sabotage you

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Replies

  • lo89ol
    lo89ol Posts: 59
    I think that many have posted rude comments on here and that it is hard to make a judgment without first understanding an individual's family dynamic and the relationship that they have with their parents. I do think that you need to take responsibility for yourself and blame cannot be passed onto your dad because you are an adult and YOU are the one making a change, not HIM.

    However, I also believe that 3 times in one week is a bit obnoxious. As your father, he should be a little more supportive in your journey. If he was bringing food home for himself, it would be one situation, but after you asked him not to bring anything for you, and he did it anyway, it took things to a different level. It is almost as if he was taunting you with the food when you asked him not to.

    Also, moving out might be an option for some, however, when you live in the New York metro area, I know from personal experience, it is not always feasible, ESPECIALLY when you are a full time student. This board is supposed to be for support and although everyone is entitled to their opinion, I think people should try to be more constructive in their criticism and not so plain old MEAN, RUDE, and DISRESPECTFUL.
  • MJ7910
    MJ7910 Posts: 1,280 Member
    I am 24yrs old and if i could move out i would be out, but i am still in school full time and work 3 different jobs right now i financially can not move out. He does need to lose weight weighing close to 400lbs and i cook dinner every night make more than enough so he can have it the next day for lunch and so on, my mom is on board with healthier eating all i want is him to do the same, 3 times or more a week with bringing in fast food is a bit extreme once a week i can deal with, i guess in a way im mad that he doesnt seem to care but on the other hand i dont want this man to eat himself to death..thank you to thoes who have understood where i am coming from for your kind words...i just needed to vent

    I get where you are coming from. i know others have said it's his house, which is true. but if you are asking him just to not bring it around you or not offer you any, he is being a bit disrespectful. you never said he couldn't have it, but maybe he can just eat it in the kitchen and not offer you any. i don't think that is really too much to ask.
  • petreebird
    petreebird Posts: 344 Member
    I am 24yrs old and if i could move out i would be out, but i am still in school full time and work 3 different jobs right now i financially can not move out. He does need to lose weight weighing close to 400lbs and i cook dinner every night make more than enough so he can have it the next day for lunch and so on, my mom is on board with healthier eating all i want is him to do the same, 3 times or more a week with bringing in fast food is a bit extreme once a week i can deal with, i guess in a way im mad that he doesnt seem to care but on the other hand i dont want this man to eat himself to death..thank you to thoes who have understood where i am coming from for your kind words...i just needed to vent

    This is where it all began to make sense to me...it seems that you are really worried about him and are frustrated with the fact that you are trying to help him and he doesn't see the need for it. Is it possible that some of your frustration is coming from fear? Esp. since you are learning all kinds of new and healthier ways of doing things and he is being to stubborn to listen?? That does make a lot of sense. Sure I know its frustrating when he bring that food around you, but I'm sure it is equally as frustrating to see him doing this to himself.
  • mikeyOnfire
    mikeyOnfire Posts: 1
    Honestly, it could be a few things. Your father may not know what's he's doing, and is completely oblivious to your goals. Or, he could be aware of your goal and not care, therefore he brings home the foods u used to love, or crave. Next, he could be attempting to ease some pain he thinks your new lifestyle is causing you by offering and bringing home "comfort" foods. Afterall, he may not want to see his little girl go through anything strenuous. Another situation could be more malevolent, or challenging, and he can be doing this to really TEST your resolve...how far will u actually go with this? If he's been in the military or he is a very hard worker, this might be the case. You know your father better than anyone on this forum, so ask yourself, why is he REALLY doing this...and if u cant figure it out, just walk up to him, while he's eating his burger and fries, sippin on some cola, "Dad, why do u insist on feeding me this garbage? I'm TRYING to lose weight. Bring home some fruit and nuts for god sakes."...Ur a smart individual, so come up with ways to confront the problem. Sometimes life throws us challenges, even in the form of loved ones or ppl we trust, to really push us further. GL!!!!!!!!!!!
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