Long distance relationships.

Options
135678

Replies

  • JThomas61
    JThomas61 Posts: 892
    Options
    Ever been in one?
    Currently in one...met him here, on MFP. We were friends for many months before we becoming more...that happened when we met IRL Feburary of this year.
    How did it work out?
    Stay tuned. LOL. I won't lie...the seperation can be tough at times...but that's what "creative messaging" and Skyping is for. :blushing:
    How far apart?
    States for us as well.
    Tips? tricks? ideas?!
    Well I would say you'll have to lose the jealousy...it's won't work otherwise. Trust has to be a MAJOR factor. Communicate as often as you can...and realize that if it works, someone's gotta move! Good luck!!!

    ETA I don't know if I could do it very long term if there wasn't a light at the end of the tunnel so to speak...a goal to not let it go for years being so far apart.

    2 Days!
  • Ladyiianae
    Ladyiianae Posts: 271 Member
    Options
    When I met my husband he lived in Minnesota and I lived in Florida. We "dated" long distance for about 2 years before I was able to move up to Minnesota. We scheduled friday night "date" nights where we'd both rent a movie and watch it together over the phone. Cell phoned ALOT. Visit a couple of times during the year. Emailed A LOT. It didn't seem hard at the time we went through it but honestly, looking back...wow.

    It is possible! I am living proof!
  • AlbaAngel25
    AlbaAngel25 Posts: 484 Member
    Options
    My husband and I were in a long distant relationship for 6 months i would say. I lived on the west coast and he was in NY. Well, I was that kinda girl that wanted to be close my bf, and it didnt make sense to be away. So, he moved to the west....and now we are married, with a 7month old baby girl!
    It can work.. The drive has to be there , but ultimately listen to your gut. If you both want it badly enough i think it can all work out! good luck

    As for tips and tricks... we txted/called each other all the time. We also chatted with webcam everyday.
  • kristi_asco
    kristi_asco Posts: 183
    Options
    i'm in one, it sucks but it'll be worth it in the end :) if you really love someone, you'll do anything for them
  • wbgolden
    wbgolden Posts: 2,071 Member
    Options
    8 hour drive or 60 minute ish flight apart. Didn't work. Wish it had.
  • angelaclassact
    angelaclassact Posts: 66 Member
    Options
    With trust issues and jealousy....no relationship will work, and it doesn't matter how close (or far apart) you are.
  • shelbyterry5
    shelbyterry5 Posts: 23 Member
    Options
    I started dating...my now husband two weeks before he deployed to Afghanistan. Communication is KEY! It was very difficult but well worth it :) Married a year in August!

    It's the little things that matter here... a simple call, text or email will show you care!

    Flowers were also nice :)
  • zsaoosh
    zsaoosh Posts: 402 Member
    Options
    It only works if you know the person, can trust the person, can trust yourself and the most important......have a plan in place that puts you two together. With no end in sight, it gets hopeless.
  • elexichoccyeater
    elexichoccyeater Posts: 310 Member
    Options
    let him travel........ you are worth it!!!!!............ especially at first! and as for jealousy MMMMMmmmm you have to trust or it WILL NOT work (same as if he lived near) If he is going to cheat it doesn't matter where he lives xx all the best x
  • hdroddy
    hdroddy Posts: 122
    Options
    Ever been in one?

    Yup

    How did it work out?

    Married now.

    How far apart?

    12 hour drive



    I'm talking states. Very new relationship, very excited about it and nervous at the same time. I have jealousy issues that I never knew I had, with him.

    Tips? tricks? ideas?!

    Communicate. Communicate. Communicate. Ad Nauseam.

    lol HELP!!
  • momtozmc
    momtozmc Posts: 418 Member
    Options
    bump
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
    Options
    And ever has it been known that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation ~ Khalil Gibran

    When I was younger I had a long distance relationship with a very (and I mean very) beautiful Swedish girl. The distance made the relationship last longer than it really should have as the enforced separation created a false sense of intimacy. It was easy to ignore the warning signs as I just wasn't around her enough to see she was in fact nuttier than a squirrel's fridge.

    Love is just as much about the nitty gritty every day stuff as it is about the big romantic gestures. I think if you don't allow yourself to be blinded by absence and approach it with a level head they can work very well however.
  • LadyWingsFan
    LadyWingsFan Posts: 31
    Options
    Trust me...even if you live only 1.5 hours away from each other (like my boyfriend and I do), it IS a long distance relationship if your main communication is by phone/email/Facebook, which it is for us.

    You have to be more of an independent-minded person to have it work for you, I believe. Some people need someone around every day. I'm raising my children, so I cannot at this time give my full attention to my boyfriend EVERY day. It would eventually wear thin on him.

    We see each other every two weeks. It works well for us. He's more of an independant person as well, so this situation is ideal for us. NOW. We've now seen each other for three years this upcoming June. :D

    There needs to be a light at the end of the tunnel. When my kids are grown up (five more years), I will either move by him or vice versa. OR we may move out of state with each other to go somewhere warmer (I'm in Michigan brrr!) There WILL be a day when we live together and can give each other the time each other deserves.

    Have FUN with each other! There is no way you can know what he's up to and vice versa. You cannot boggle your mind with that kind of stuff...try not to think about it. People enjoy being around someone who's fun and upbeat 80% of the time. Don't start that jealousy/spying on him/questioning stuff. That is a relationship killer--believe me, I've done that before! And he shouldn't be doing that to you. Have your own life. You're a better person that way. Again, I learned that the hard way :)

    It can work! These days it's so much easier with Skype, email, Facebook, cell phones with no long distance cost nonsense.

    I wish you the best of luck!
  • dane11235813
    dane11235813 Posts: 684 Member
    Options
    I've been in long distance relationships. Not different states, but about 40-45 minute drive apart, they didn't work. I'm the type of person where I need someone close by.

    45 minutes? that's like across town. LOL
  • mznisaelaine
    mznisaelaine Posts: 2,262 Member
    Options
    Im in California and my ex-bf moved to Washington (for school) and so it became a long distance relationship but although we were already together for a little over 3 years, we broke up about a month after he moved there.

    ETA: Communication is key... Communication..
  • 10KEyes
    10KEyes Posts: 250 Member
    Options
    A real relationship means sharing your lives with each other. Impossible to do long distance.
  • Gargoyle69
    Gargoyle69 Posts: 87 Member
    Options
    bump
    in the night...
  • jogar54
    jogar54 Posts: 4
    Options
    I was in a coast to coast relationship and it seems to have worked out .....we have been married for 29 years.
  • yessiseguy
    yessiseguy Posts: 116
    Options
    Communication IS key....... One time (mmmmm 10 yrs ago) I tried it. Email was available but not phone email.
    It worked but little by little we drifted apart :(
    I totally tried bc I was obssessed with this guy. I truly adored him. I would respond to each and every email
    and would wait patiently but at the end, he started emailing less.
    However, I do believe that nowadays that should be much easier and if the love is there, why not? It can happen :)
  • Natx83
    Natx83 Posts: 1,308 Member
    Options
    I think it can work out if the 2 people want it too enough, no half assed attempts will work long distance, you would want to have some solid feelings first!

Categories