Women & Weddings (from a guy's point of view)

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  • Krissy366
    Krissy366 Posts: 458 Member
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    So true. I was heavy on my wedding day (still am, but working on it) and it didn't keep us from being happy, celebrating with family/friends and having a wonderful time.

    I read an article recently about women getting feeding tubes before their weddings in order to lose weight. I think that's sad, and just a little pathetic.
  • marsellient
    marsellient Posts: 591 Member
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    Very nice post, and just maybe it will help someone stress less!! As someone else said, more thought about the marriage and less about the wedding is important.
  • HeatherMN
    HeatherMN Posts: 3,821 Member
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    As a bride-to-be (October 2013), I really appreciate this. Thanks for the wonderful reminder.

    I keep telling myself that I was almost 30 lbs. heavier when I met my fiance, so he obviously thinks I'm awesome. If I don't lose anything from where I'm at today, it won't matter one bit to him, so it shouldn't matter to me, either!
  • sarahkatara
    sarahkatara Posts: 826 Member
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    You are a good guy! I'm going to be a 2013 bride (hopefully, if all goes well) and i'm getting HEALTHY and HAPPY for the wedding. of course, looking my best is a priority but i know if i exude confidence and calm, all will fall into place. Some ladies here would do well to take this advice to heart!
  • TheGoblinRoad
    TheGoblinRoad Posts: 835 Member
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    I just printed your post off and giving it to a friend who is doing drastic measures for her wedding. Your thoughts were so well said and much better than I could ever express on paper. Thanks for sharing.

    I appreciate that very much, and I hope it helps her. I think a lot of guys think as I do, though many don't want to say anything to their fiancees.
  • MrsORourke
    MrsORourke Posts: 315 Member
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    As a bride to be...I must say, THIS is an awesome post!! THANK YOU!
  • minimaggie
    minimaggie Posts: 224 Member
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    Exactly! I mean, I'm trying to be fit for my wedding, but in all honesty, my Fiancee thinks I look best sans makeup, in glasses, in his tshirt and my yoga pants. Guys love us for *who* we are, not what we look like.

    Unless they're shallow ****s. ;)

    Women don't need makeup anyway. :) I think your fiancee thinks like I do. Yeah, there are guys out there who prefer women dressed up, made up, hair all perfect, but in all honesty I think those guys are rare.

    First let me say your wife is a lucky lady!!! You are sweet and supportive!!!

    Secondly, while I LOVE getting all dolled up to go out and want all the compliments that go with the effort, my SO always thinks I look the sexiest when I get home from the gym with my ponytail, yoga pants and sweat soaked tank. He says it's the glow from a good work out that is the hottest!!!
  • sarahkatara
    sarahkatara Posts: 826 Member
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    So true. I was heavy on my wedding day (still am, but working on it) and it didn't keep us from being happy, celebrating with family/friends and having a wonderful time.

    I read an article recently about women getting feeding tubes before their weddings in order to lose weight. I think that's sad, and just a little pathetic.

    Same here and it's more than a little pathetic. As someone recovered from anorexia, who spent at least a solid year refusing to eat enough food to stay alive and with a tube down her nose to replace those missing calories, it's insulting, disgusting, worrying, and absolutely unacceptable on every level. This makes a mockery of the extremes that some people have to rely on to LIVE. Whether an eating disorder or cancer that makes it hard to get the nutrition you need, an NG tube is the LAST resort for any doctor. Anyone who would prescribe this should have their licenses pulled immediately. Seriously. And can you imagine her little girl, whose mom doesn't pick her up at school because she has a tube stuck down her nose for vanity reasons? She doesn't deserve to be a mother.
  • jessicawrites
    jessicawrites Posts: 235 Member
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    This was so sweet and lovely! I am getting married exactly six months from Friday and recently joined to lose about 10 pounds before dress fittings start (most of the weight comes from winter and holiday treats). Being engaged has its stressful moments, but mostly I've been so happy that we have this time to plan, dream, and get even more excited about the party we are planning for the people we love. Thanks for reminding me that when I see the look on his face on that day, the least important thing in the world will be whatever the scale said.
  • TheGoblinRoad
    TheGoblinRoad Posts: 835 Member
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    So true. I was heavy on my wedding day (still am, but working on it) and it didn't keep us from being happy, celebrating with family/friends and having a wonderful time.

    I read an article recently about women getting feeding tubes before their weddings in order to lose weight. I think that's sad, and just a little pathetic.

    Same here and it's more than a little pathetic. As someone recovered from anorexia, who spent at least a solid year refusing to eat enough food to stay alive and with a tube down her nose to replace those missing calories, it's insulting, disgusting, worrying, and absolutely unacceptable on every level. This makes a mockery of the extremes that some people have to rely on to LIVE. Whether an eating disorder or cancer that makes it hard to get the nutrition you need, an NG tube is the LAST resort for any doctor. Anyone who would prescribe this should have their licenses pulled immediately. Seriously. And can you imagine her little girl, whose mom doesn't pick her up at school because she has a tube stuck down her nose for vanity reasons? She doesn't deserve to be a mother.

    Saw that. :( She likely isn't considering the way it could impact her daughter in the future. I wouldn't say she doesn't deserve to be a mom, but definitely what we do has an impact on our kids and that's something to at least consider. With my daughter, I try to demonstrate good habits. When I falter, it's usually when she's not around. Probably would already be my goal weight if she followed me around all day. ;)
  • Ali_TSO
    Ali_TSO Posts: 1,172 Member
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    I remember it was the description of your wife on your profile that made me send you a friend request in the first place. This exemplefies it even more. :happy:
  • TheGoblinRoad
    TheGoblinRoad Posts: 835 Member
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    I remember it was the description of your wife on your profile that made me send you a friend request in the first place. This exemplefies it even more. :happy:

    You're sweet! Thanks :bigsmile:
  • AnninStPaul
    AnninStPaul Posts: 1,372 Member
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    I must add that it shouldn't be so much about the wedding (though I myself had a lovely one), it is about the marriage, and it sounds like you sir have a wonderful one!

    ^^THIS
  • kjerstenkipp
    kjerstenkipp Posts: 139 Member
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    This is for the women on MFP getting married.

    If you're about to get married, please trust me: the guy is thrilled, unless it's a shotgun wedding, literally (with dear old dad standing nearby with his double gauge shotgun, fully loaded)

    I understand that people want to "look their best" for their weddings, including the guys, so I'm not opposed to the concept of trying to lose weight in advance, BUT...

    1. Your guy's going to think you're hot. That's just how it is.
    2. Your guy wants you happy, not stressed about losing the weight.
    3. How much better will your wedding be if you acknowledge yourself for every good habit you made to be healthier without spending half the time feeling lousy if you didn't reach the ultimate goal you set (which might've been unrealistic)

    Writing this because I've noticed how people resort to methods that seem unhealthy. I'm not going to get into specifics about which methods, since people don't agree, and most of us aren't doctors anyway.

    So be kind to yourself. Do what feels right, do what feels healthy, pursue health without putting yourself at risk, and appreciate yourself as much as you can on your wedding day!

    ----From a happily married guy who weighed more on his wedding day than he does now, whose wife wasn't slim at the wedding but nevertheless was the most beautiful he had ever seen her. (and 11 years later, thinks she's even more lovely on a regular day)
    Word!
  • bekinator
    bekinator Posts: 103
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    thanks so much for your post; it's really encouraging! getting ready for my august wedding, i've heard how some chicks are doing drastic things- on the news last night they had a blurb about bridal hunger games. wow. and the chicks on tv were half my size already. some days i want to shed my bulges like there's no tomorrow, honestly, but it is encouraging to know that he's marrying me for me already, and to snap out of it.
  • msudaisy28
    msudaisy28 Posts: 267 Member
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    Well said! I dieted before my wedding and never did meet my goal weight. But after my dress alterations I didn't want to lose anything more (that dress needed to fit me like a glove!), so I focused on maintaining and on our honeymoon there were no rules to follow!
  • Bosbes
    Bosbes Posts: 55 Member
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    You should put this in a blog! So more people will read it.
  • TheGoblinRoad
    TheGoblinRoad Posts: 835 Member
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    You should put this in a blog! So more people will read it.

    Done, though I don't know if MORE would read it. In any case, here's the link:

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/TheGoblinRoad/view/women-and-weddings-from-a-guy-s-point-of-view-244070
  • Jaimehathcock
    Jaimehathcock Posts: 9 Member
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    God bless you!!!! I am getting married this summer. With my highest weight in my life I am trying to loose while he is away for army training so he can come back to a slimer, more beautiful me. I know he love me and thinks I am beautiful, however I always thought I could be better....
  • Patty_Petz
    Patty_Petz Posts: 91
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    I love, LOVE, luuuuuurve your blog....read it all the time! This post reinforces why! Great post :flowerforyou:

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