Lost the baby.. Now losing the weight.

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miss_sparrow
miss_sparrow Posts: 3
in Introduce Yourself
Hi everyone. I'm new around here, and just starting out in getting back into good shape.

My name is Caressa, I'm 21, and from the pacific northwest. I'm 5'8 and 197 lbs, and I want to get down to about 155,160 or so. I'm a married stay at home Mom to a fantastic little boy that will be 2 on May 5th, and an angel baby.

2 weeks ago, I was 23 weeks pregnant. I was carrying a little boy named Ryder Anthony, and Ryder had a rare chromosomal abnormality called Ring 13, along with a congenital heart defect. Had he lived, he would have required open heart surgery but instead, he earned his angel wings on 4-14-12.

I'm only 1 week, 3 days post partum so my body is still recovering, however it was a perfect, no complications delivery so I'll be clear to start working out this weekend. I want to get my body in tip top shape ASAP.. I was sedentary for most of the pregnancy so I've gained more than I'd like to have, and I can't stand looking like I've recently had a baby and yet have no baby to show for it. So I think part of the healing process for me is to grieve through exercise, if that makes any sense. Plus, in about 6-8 months or so, my husband and I would like to try again to have a healthy baby. I want to be in the best possible health at that point.

Anyways, I'm sure I'll need a ton of support along the way. I'll probably be around these forums often, so I look forward to getting to know you guys along the way :)
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Replies

  • Charismasme2
    Charismasme2 Posts: 118 Member
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    Welcome Caressa!!! This is the best place!!! Lots of support or what every you may need. You do what you feel you need to in order to grieve. I'm sorry for your loss. You have a really good attitude, and if you every need anything, just let me know. There's a ton of really great people on here. Here's to your success in ALL your goals!!!
  • jroja021
    jroja021 Posts: 74 Member
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    I'm here for you... I had a complicated pregnancy and know only a small 1 % of what you feel.. My condolenses... I bet you will due great and achieve your goal in no time with mfp!
  • EversBeautiful
    EversBeautiful Posts: 33
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    Welcome and sorry for your loss, I also lost my little girl Angel in Jan. I'm also trying to deal with the loss and I turned to getting myself healthy, feel free to add me
  • Wisewoman888
    Wisewoman888 Posts: 72 Member
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    Hey Miss Sparrow! Big hugs on your loss. I can't imagine what it's like to lose a child at 23wks. I've lost two at 6 & 13weeks. I think you're amazing with your attitude to get on top of your health and wellbeing to conceive again! Good on you!
    I too want to have one more child (I have 3, boy girl twins age 8 and a boy aged 6) before I'm 50 (I'm 42 atm), so kudos to losing weight!
    Add me!
  • jheartj95
    jheartj95 Posts: 34 Member
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    I too lost a baby at 21 weeks. I know your pain. I had a 13 month old son to care for, but I was still going through the symptoms of having a newborn. Just take care of you and your family, and the rest will fall into place. It just takes time.
  • TurtleRunnerNC
    TurtleRunnerNC Posts: 768 Member
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    Just want to say that I am so sorry for your loss.
  • shiseido_faerie
    shiseido_faerie Posts: 771 Member
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    *hugs* welcome!
    I'm terribly sorry for your family's loss :( I wish I had some healing words for you but right now all I can do is offer you support on this journey to heal and get healthy. Feel free to add me!
  • batalina
    batalina Posts: 209 Member
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    just wanted to say my heart goes out to you, and i wish you the best of luck in your weightloss journey and for your family, now and in the future :)
  • Natx83
    Natx83 Posts: 1,308 Member
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    Wow, I'm sorry to hear about your loss, you will get heaps of support in many forms on here and good luck with reaching your goals!
  • lurn
    lurn Posts: 2
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    Welcome! Good luck, girl! I'm starting here myself.
  • RachelsReboot
    RachelsReboot Posts: 569 Member
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    Welcome, I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my second son at 22 weeks and 3 days and my daughter at 19 weeks 4 days. I know your pain and I know that sometimes we have to find out own ways to heal. Feel free to add me as a friend, I would love to offer you support.
  • c_muschany
    c_muschany Posts: 37 Member
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    Wow, I couldn't imagine. I am so sorry that happened to you, your husband, and your son. Take care of yourself and give that little boy of yours an extra squeeze. I wish you all the luck in the world for your future baby!
  • JillSandm
    JillSandm Posts: 52 Member
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    So sorry for your loss and the pain you are feeling! I think it is a great plan to focus on healing through healthy living, but be sure to take the time to grieve and just feel sad. We lost our 10-year-old daughter to cancer last fall, and felt like people tried to rush us through the grief process before we were ready. Subsequently, I ate my emotions (since no one wanted to deal with "sad Jill") and wound up gaining nearly 20 pounds in just a very short time. Don't be afraid to grieve for however long you need, and if exercising your grief away works for you, then go for it!

    Again, I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine a scenario where it would ever be "easy" to lose a child...
  • timanda2
    timanda2 Posts: 149
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    I lost a baby at 7 weeks, I can't imagine how difficult this must be for you. So sorry for your loss, but I know you can make your goals! feel free to add me!
  • RedMuse
    RedMuse Posts: 50 Member
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    Welcome, and so sorry for your loss. I wish you the best!! Add me if you like!!
  • CrazyMidget611
    CrazyMidget611 Posts: 102 Member
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    I am so, so sorry for your loss.

    Feel free to friend me, we can motivate each other :)
  • Billywoo
    Billywoo Posts: 141 Member
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    Wow.. very sorry to hear that. If you need anyone to talk to about exercise, eating habits, or your child, im here. I know you don't know me but April 15th was the 3rd anneversary for my sons passing at 6 wks old. I know how hard it is. My weight loss journey is dedicated to him. Good luck with yours... Sorry again....
  • tina0314
    tina0314 Posts: 6
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    HUGS to you and good luck on your journey!:smile:
  • NoreenF
    NoreenF Posts: 10 Member
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    I am also very new here. Prayers go out to you and your family--and looking forward to getting to know you and supporting each other as we all move toward our goal.
  • melb2003
    melb2003 Posts: 198
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    My heart geniuenly goes out to you. I lost a baby last year in June and I never even knew how far along I was in the pregnancy. I could imagine probably no more than 4-8 weeks. It still hurt so bad emotionally and even now, after trying to conceive for 4 years, it makes me cry when thinking about it. I couldn't imagine how badly you hurt right now. I guess I could consider myself fortunate that I didn't have to go through most of the pregnancy.

    Feel free to add me. I've been here for almost 3 months and there is a ton of support here. If you ever have questions regarding fitness, the people here are more than happy to share their knowledge and what would works for them.

    Best of luck!! :smile:

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