Which one is more important.. Looks or Personality

245

Replies

  • Aleyonce
    Aleyonce Posts: 43 Member
    I ask this question because recently this guy wanted to date me but i just could not find a way to be attracted to him physically. He had a nice personality but look wise, i couldnt even say he was cute. Im not saying im the best thing since slice bread but geeez. I felt bad about it :(

    Don't feel bad. He wasn't your cup of tea. It doesn't matter if he was nice, younhave to be some what attracted to someone. If you're to then you're living a lie and feelings will be hurt in the end. Better to just be honest up front.

    Very true... i just hope i didnt make a mistake.
  • littlelily613
    littlelily613 Posts: 769 Member
    Personality has a way of making people look good or bad. Personality is more important to me.
  • SocialRopes
    SocialRopes Posts: 51 Member
    personality, no question about it. there's nothing sexier than a great sense of humor. good looks can't hurt, but personality is the key.
  • mznisaelaine
    mznisaelaine Posts: 2,262 Member
    Personality!
  • tobafa
    tobafa Posts: 344 Member
    Here's a chapter out of my life. Girl A - a former stripper. Great looking woman but oh dear God the drama (I was young and didn't know any better). Almost getting into fights because of her when we were out. Bipolar like behavior between very affectionate and outright fury. Very little trust - I wonder why? Happy in public but miserable in private.

    Girl B, not as attractive but we had a fun, hilarious, active life. She put up with my snarky humor and gave some back too. She was a prankster like me and we were truly good friends.

    If you had a choice? Mine would be Girl B every time.
  • nomorewishing
    nomorewishing Posts: 250 Member
    Both. I don't want someone drop dead gorgeous, but I would like to be able to look at them (or think about them) without feeling like I'm about to lose my lunch :smile:
  • Aleyonce
    Aleyonce Posts: 43 Member
    Here's a chapter out of my life. Girl A - a former stripper. Great looking woman but oh dear God the drama (I was young and didn't know any better). Almost getting into fights because of her when we were out. Bipolar like behavior between very affectionate and outright fury. Very little trust - I wonder why? Happy in public but miserable in private.

    Girl B, not as attractive but we had a fun, hilarious, active life. She put up with my snarky humor and gave some back too. She was a prankster like me and we were truly good friends.

    If you had a choice? Mine would be Girl B every time.

    Wow Girl A sound like a mess. Are you with Girl B now?
  • stepherzzzzz
    stepherzzzzz Posts: 469 Member
    Nope. I could never date someone I wasn't attracted to.
  • tobafa
    tobafa Posts: 344 Member
    Girl B moved but we keep in touch. She's married now and I'm married to a Girl B+ now. :love:
  • neverstray
    neverstray Posts: 3,845 Member
    Looks are a funny thing; they can disappear so quickly when the personality sucks. Whereas, a less attractive person can become super attractive and sexy after getting to know her.

    Another thing, when my mom went through her 15 year breast cancer battle, her boyfriend endured things that I just don't know that I could deal with. But, her looks faded and she became bald, and had a mastectomy, and all that, and he still loved her. No one thinks about those kinds of things. But, you really should. If that person you're with became disabled in some way, would you still be with them?
  • Reddak98
    Reddak98 Posts: 58 Member
    No amount of good looks can make up for a bad personality.
  • _snw_
    _snw_ Posts: 1,298 Member
    unfortunately, no. (personality is not enough)


    i can pretend all i want that the personality is enough for me, but yeah, when it's not there, it's not there. call me vain, but that's the truth.

    i'm going to be an awesome old lady.
  • hiker282
    hiker282 Posts: 983 Member
    Kind of a trick question, attraction can be greatly fostered via personality; but looks are important too. I can't see myself enjoying the company of somebody I didn't at least find somewhat physically appealing.
  • ProjectTae
    ProjectTae Posts: 434 Member
    Out of curiousity and i would like to get EVERYONE opinion on this.

    Would you date a woman/ man who isnt so attractive but has a great personality?

    Absolutely, I want substance, not a trophy, as long as he has good hygiene, and a great personality I'm totally for it!
  • nammer79
    nammer79 Posts: 664 Member
    I want the best of both I can't say that what I look for is the same as the next guy but I know what I like
  • Sp1nGoddess
    Sp1nGoddess Posts: 1,134 Member
    Looks initially, personality (and skills... ) long term...
  • DianneBoo
    DianneBoo Posts: 226 Member
    You might initially be attracted to someone based on their looks.....but you STAY attracted based on who they are! I am about as plain as plain can be, but have been asked out more than I would expect dou to my outgoing and open perosnality (that is what they tell me...lol). So, personality wins by a landslide!
  • seattlerain
    seattlerain Posts: 189 Member
    Neither. I base all relationships on astrological signs and sexual talent.

    Winning.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,026 Member
    It's depends. I've seen people who had good personalities and been overweight their whole life, get lean and their personalities become that of one that then looked down on others who are now overweight. They got very arrogant and cocky especially to those who may have overlooked them in prior years due to their weight.
    And I know so many people who look great and have great personalities to go along with it. But then again I've met many good looking people who had bad attitudes and felt their were above everyone too.
    To me what's important is how I get along with that person and how they treat me. If they can't do that right, then neither personality or looks matter.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    [/quote]
  • Edwin_S
    Edwin_S Posts: 440 Member
    If you fall in love with their eyes then they will never grow old, cause your eyes will always look the same. I'd say looks over personality cause cheesewhiz adds personality, just kidding...personality all the way.
  • Jordant107
    Jordant107 Posts: 218 Member
    Depends on how long you want to date!! If its short term, then it'd be more about looks than anything. But if you're thinking long term, then you have to realise that looks fade, and you could end up with a cranky old b***h if you only went for looks. A balance is the best thing!!! (Generally hot people have better personalities cause they are confident and outgoing.............?!?)
  • Aleyonce
    Aleyonce Posts: 43 Member
    Girl B moved but we keep in touch. She's married now and I'm married to a Girl B+ now. :love:

    Yay! Good for you. I hope i find a Boy B soon lol!
  • Trechechus
    Trechechus Posts: 2,819 Member
    As much as I'd like to say that would date a man based solely on his personality, I feel that both play a role. I am friends with a huge variety of people, but romantically, I'm really picky. Luckily for me, though, I'm mostly into guys who aren't conventionally "handsome." :tongue:
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
    I'm going to sound shallow (and maybe I am) but looks are important. Its the first impression. However, for a long term relationship imho its the personality that seals the deal and its the personality that you fall in love for. Its personality and love that makes you grow old together.

    However, looks for me are important. Looks are the reason I will go out with you. Its basically the start.
  • FloraSin
    FloraSin Posts: 188 Member
    Personality over looks for sure! I love my nerdy game programmer (who likes being active and reading). We have so much in common. His total hotness is just a great bonus.

    I didn't even have to think about this because if I lined up all of my boyfriends since high school, nobody would guess what they had in common. (Lanky Dutch Guy, Overweight Chinese Guy, and my current Fit Geek Jamaican Guy). lol.
  • Aleyonce
    Aleyonce Posts: 43 Member
    Looks are a funny thing; they can disappear so quickly when the personality sucks. Whereas, a less attractive person can become super attractive and sexy after getting to know her.

    Another thing, when my mom went through her 15 year breast cancer battle, her boyfriend endured things that I just don't know that I could deal with. But, her looks faded and she became bald, and had a mastectomy, and all that, and he still loved her. No one thinks about those kinds of things. But, you really should. If that person you're with became disabled in some way, would you still be with them?

    Very good point! You see how insightful this can be. Another way to look at it.
  • Aleyonce
    Aleyonce Posts: 43 Member
    I want the best of both I can't say that what I look for is the same as the next guy but I know what I like

    So what is it that you like? lol
  • rehtaeh78
    rehtaeh78 Posts: 90
    Attractiveness is different for everyone, so someone I find hot may not be hot to the next person.

    I do put more emphasis on personality though, an extremely attractive person gets less attractive with a bad personality and an average looking guy can become irresistible with a great personality...

    ^This. And if we're honest with ourselves, usually looks are what get us interested in the first place but personality is what makes us want to stick around.
  • Aleyonce
    Aleyonce Posts: 43 Member
    I'm going to sound shallow (and maybe I am) but looks are important. Its the first impression. However, for a long term relationship imho its the personality that seals the deal and its the personality that you fall in love for. Its personality and love that makes you grow old together.

    However, looks for me are important. Looks are the reason I will go out with you. Its basically the start.

    Thanks for being honest!
  • bigdawg025
    bigdawg025 Posts: 774 Member
    You generally only get a foot in the door with looks... Personality is what enables you to stay. If you don't have the looks you have to work damn hard to get the foot in the door... trust me... I know first hand.
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