Discrimination against skinny/fit women

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Replies

  • I totally understand what you're saying. Before I lost weight people made dumb comments all the time how I have gotten chubby and should just go eat.
    And a lot of my overweight friends HATE on skinny girls, for no other reason, just that they're skinny.

    Seems like no one can do anything right, people will always judge you.
  • I work at a gym and I workout there a lot and I get so excited when I see bigger women working hard. I get tempted to talk to them and try to help them and give them tips that helped me. I was never huge, but that doesn't mean I never felt self conscious or uncomfortable like them. I feel like since I've had some success with my weight loss and I have so much knowledge I just want to share it with anyone who will listen to me blabber on...
    I still get slightly envious when I see super fit women, but at the same there workout out and working just as hard as I am. I hate the people who are naturally super skinny :)
  • Lesson to take from all of this:

    SOME people are *kitten*, no matter what their (or your) weight.
  • crisanderson27
    crisanderson27 Posts: 5,343 Member
    Okay, so I have been fat and I have been thin, and/or fit. I have found that there are two types of discrimination. Discrimination from skinny people (mostly women) against fat women and the contrary - fat women against skinny women.

    I will tell ya, I have a new appreciation for women who have looked good their entire life. Having been on both sides of the discrimination, I have found that skinny women are far more tolerant of overweight women then the other way around. These days, heaven forbid should I want to cross the road and a heavy set woman is driving my way. She'd just assume run me over then let me cross. OR, if I am walking into a building behind an overweight woman, she'd just assume let the door hit me in the face than hold it. Things like this keep happening and happening to me. Although, when I was fat, I had a small degree of this from skinny women, the contrary far out weighs those experiences. I have had women say, very seriously, "I hate you" or "You B*&^ch" because of my weight loss. Thoughts and experiences on the subject?

    The phrase is "as soon". As in "She would as soon run me over". Maybe it was your brain they were trying to put out of its misery.

    How incredibly rude.

    I guess elementary forum skills would have eliminated your double post. Perhaps you should take the time to consider your own mental acuity, rather than poking sticks at someone else's.
    Lesson to take from all of this:

    SOME people are *kitten*, no matter what their (or your) weight.

    Case in point above.
  • PinkiePie07
    PinkiePie07 Posts: 103 Member
    I've been thin and I've been fat, and I've never really noticed a difference. I get looks sometimes. Never anything too mean or anything, but I've always gotten looks. Back when I was thin it was because I was insanely into the goth thing and now it's probably due to my weight and me being kind of loud sometimes. It's not something I really even notice anymore.

    As for negative thoughts towards skinny/fit women...never had a single one. I will be a proper lady to any and everyone. Maybe I'm a tad bit jealous of the way your body looks but honestly, I can (WILL) look that way hopefully in the not-to-distant future. I made the choice to not take care of myself. It just seems silly to take that out on someone else who had a better mind about it than I did.
  • I have a fast metabolism so I have been thin my whole life, which only further proves that ED's are not a choice because somehow I developed Anorexia.


    I want to mention that I went into recovery and gained to a healthy weight of 123lbs (I'm 5'5").
    I am thin by medical definition yes,
    and last week I had somebody throw a cheeseburger at me.

    I was also told by a complete stranger who was respectfully, overweight, that I should 'eat a bucket of cristco' because I was 'disgusting to look at'.



    I'm not underweight, I'm not overweight, I'm perfectly healthy so discrimination must exist because this happens more often than you'd think... =\
  • crisanderson27
    crisanderson27 Posts: 5,343 Member
    Interesting side note.

    I liked what a girl said in a different thread, so I clicked on her profile.

    This is her 'About Me':
    About Me
    I don't accept female friend request and here is why: Girls are the first to try and rip somebody apart. It does not matter how old they are, and I am honestly sick of their high school drama.

    I'm not sure if this just proves that estrogen is the devil, or what. I don't even know if it's actually relevant to the thread in that it helps prove or disprove the OP's point.

    I just thought it was ironic.
  • insatiable_need
    insatiable_need Posts: 127 Member
    :)

    tumblr_lye5uqubVM1r2hffuo1_500.png

    I LOVE THIS!!!!!!!!!!
  • callmejessica
    callmejessica Posts: 1,868 Member
    I am a fairly small girl being a little taller than 5'1" and weighing about 115lbs. I have lots of friends that joke to me about how they could snap me in half or that their dogs weigh more than me. I can take a joke, but what really bothers me is when my girl friends start talking about their weight issues or fitness goals. Being pretty active myself, I always want to pitch in my own goals, but when I do, they shut me down and give me sass for having anything to worry about. All I want is to live a healthy lifestyle and be able to discuss things with others, not rub what I've got in other people's faces. I guess that's why I am so thankful to have MFP: you guys are all so supportive no matter what shape or size and no matter how far along your journey you are!
  • acs4162
    acs4162 Posts: 99 Member
    I used to weigh 282 pounds and iv got down to 166, with a large-build and at 5'10 i look okay, i do not look ill or like i have an ED or anything, my BMI and BF are in healthy ranges and my family all say how much healthier i look after losing all the weight. Ive started running and doing weights and carried on my healthy eating because my goal weight is 150.

    some of my friends however have totally changed their attitudes towards me. Ive known some of these girls 7 or 8 years and have been best friends all that time. when i was morbidly obese, i never got any comments made about how i looked or my choices in food. HOWEVER, it is a totally different story now.

    I am constantly told how horrible i look and that i look like im about to 'snap' which is ridiculous. my best friend in particular tells me how ill i look on a regular basis and criticises my food choices and exercise choices. she herself is quite overweight, she wears the same size clothes that i used to wear when i was 282, im not sure of her weight, i would never ask as it is a sensitive issue for some people.

    i dont know why my friends think they now have the right to critisize my appearence and be judgemental of my food choices, when i was morbidly obese, they never did, they used to tell me they liked my dress/hair and things rather than put me down.

    I would never dream of critizising their diets or appearence in the way they do with me, no matter how much/little they weighed so i dont understand why they do it to me.

    surely they must realise i have problems with my body image, otherwise i wouldnt have put so much effort into losing all of this weight so why they think its a good idea to make horrid comments on my appearence, ill never know.

    Get new friends

    I've experienced this a little. I lost about 15 pounds in 2 months by changing my diet and stepping up my workouts/running. I think it bothered some of the people in my life, like it was too fast for "them" to handle. While I enjoyed the "you look great" "wow, look at you!" comments at first. I started getting some that sound like they were concerned for me: "I think you're anorexic" "you don't need to lose another pound, you looked fine before- why did you want to lose weight?!" Well, that's nice that they were happy with me being unhealthy, tired, unhappy, and worn out, but I'm much happier in my healthy state and they can get used to it!
    It's like how they "deal" with the difference in you. They have to say SOMETHING, so they end up saying something rude and hurtful. I would pick one friend to confide in that will really hear your feelings and maybe they can be happy for you? I confided in a few of my close friends that are very supportive and I felt better immediately. Now they are my biggest supporters and cheer for me at each goal met! Haters are gonna hate! You look and feel good and that's all that matters! Good luck and keep working towards your goal!
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
    I once had a girl I thought was my friend systematically go out of her way to try to poison all mutual friends against me, started rumors, broke me and my boyfriend up, and sabotaged my car to prevent me from getting a job. When I confronted her, tearfully, about all of it, she said it was because she "hated skinny b*tches" and told me i didn't deserve to be happy.

    I haven't read the whole thread so sorry if someone already responded, but you have to know this is clearly about her issues and not anything to do with you. She may well hate skinny people because she has a jealous personality, but what you are describing is way beyond not liking skinny people. I don't care if you are Kate Moss, you can't inspire that kind of behavior in someone just by looks. There has to be some underlying fuel in that fire, coming from her.
  • TadaGanIarracht
    TadaGanIarracht Posts: 2,615 Member
    I'll be totally honest, I judge the skinny girls because I would rather be thin than fat.. pure jealousy when it comes to that BUT I also judge fat girls.

    I'm not sure why I do considering I am one and though I am working on it I am still morbidly obese. Sad but true.

    I definitely find curvier women more attractive than the Bratz dolls types but when they're my weight (272) wearing hip huggers and tight shirts part of me is like GOOD FOR YOU for having the confidence to wear that but the other part is just disgusted and then I turn that disgust toward my self.

    I stand in a mirror and see on myself all the flaws I've pointed out on someone else.

    It's a vicious cycle and I'm working on being less judgmental and self critical.

    All takes time. :)
  • yogibella
    yogibella Posts: 321 Member
    Can I just say that haters and rude people will always gonna hate & be rude. If it's not your weight then it's your social & economic status, race, sexuality, gender, etc. It's sad and says more about the person hating than it does about who it is targeted at. Thus OP, I wouldn't assume that rudeness directed at you is always about you or your weight. Even if it seems so, who cares? Why live in THEIR negativity?

    Skinny or fat, if you are insecure, miserable & small-minded, you're probably more likely to judge and project your self-hatred on others. If you're a happy, secure, loving person, skinny or fat, you will find no need to judge and lash out at people. Why would you?

    I also truly don't get this jealousy thing that somehow justifies idiotic & catty behaviour in some people. If someone has what you want or desire, go get it, find it, earn it, work it, whatever, instead of bringing everybody down with you and crapping on someone's success! Really!? Time to grow up and evolve as a human being no?
  • kedwardspcm
    kedwardspcm Posts: 45 Member
    Read the entire thread genius, and then comment. I typed the thread from my phone and thanks to auto correct, word predictor, and fat fingers I botched the phrase along with the "then" and "than". It didn't happen twice. I would be happy to give you a hug
  • kedwardspcm
    kedwardspcm Posts: 45 Member
    Okay, so I have been fat and I have been thin, and/or fit. I have found that there are two types of discrimination. Discrimination from skinny people (mostly women) against fat women and the contrary - fat women against skinny women.

    I will tell ya, I have a new appreciation for women who have looked good their entire life. Having been on both sides of the discrimination, I have found that skinny women are far more tolerant of overweight women then the other way around. These days, heaven forbid should I want to cross the road and a heavy set woman is driving my way. She'd just assume run me over then let me cross. OR, if I am walking into a building behind an overweight woman, she'd just assume let the door hit me in the face than hold it. Things like this keep happening and happening to me. Although, when I was fat, I had a small degree of this from skinny women, the contrary far out weighs those experiences. I have had women say, very seriously, "I hate you" or "You B*&^ch" because of my weight loss. Thoughts and experiences on the subject?

    The phrase is "as soon". As in "She would as soon run me over". Maybe it was your brain they were trying to put out of its misery.
    Read the entire thread genius, and then comment. I typed the thread from my phone and thanks to auto correct, word predictor, and fat fingers I botched the phrase along with the "then" and "than". It didn't happen twice. I would be happy to give you a hug
  • Fit_Canuck
    Fit_Canuck Posts: 788 Member
    You're an idiot. Read the entire thread genius, and then comment. I typed the thread from my phone and thanks to auto correct, word predictor, and fat fingers I botched the phrase along with the "then" and "than". It didn't happen twice. And you, my friend, are a classic example why people suck. Clearly your life sucks. I would be happy to give you a hug

    Well said, no clue while people bother mocking people with grammatical or spellchecker errors. It's so low class.
  • kedwardspcm
    kedwardspcm Posts: 45 Member
    Read the entire thread genius, and then comment. I typed the thread from my phone and thanks to auto correct, word predictor, and fat fingers I botched the phrase along with the "then" and "than". It didn't happen twice. I would be happy to give you a hug

    Well said, no clue while people bother mocking people with grammatical or spellchecker errors. It's so low class.
    Agreed. -_-
  • ZugTheMegasaurus
    ZugTheMegasaurus Posts: 801 Member
    Read the entire thread genius, and then comment. I typed the thread from my phone and thanks to auto correct, word predictor, and fat fingers I botched the phrase along with the "then" and "than". It didn't happen twice. I would be happy to give you a hug

    Well said, no clue while people bother mocking people with grammatical or spellchecker errors. It's so low class.
    I imagine it's people who disagree but can't figure out how to articulate why.
  • Tybalt71
    Tybalt71 Posts: 1,064 Member
    <
    Does not discriminate any woman -Ty
  • kedwardspcm
    kedwardspcm Posts: 45 Member
    <
    Does not discriminate any woman -Ty

    LOL
  • FitLink
    FitLink Posts: 1,317 Member
    Okay, so I have been fat and I have been thin, and/or fit. I have found that there are two types of discrimination. Discrimination from skinny people (mostly women) against fat women and the contrary - fat women against skinny women.

    I will tell ya, I have a new appreciation for women who have looked good their entire life. Having been on both sides of the discrimination, I have found that skinny women are far more tolerant of overweight women then the other way around. These days, heaven forbid should I want to cross the road and a heavy set woman is driving my way. She'd just assume run me over then let me cross. OR, if I am walking into a building behind an overweight woman, she'd just assume let the door hit me in the face than hold it. Things like this keep happening and happening to me. Although, when I was fat, I had a small degree of this from skinny women, the contrary far out weighs those experiences. I have had women say, very seriously, "I hate you" or "You B*&^ch" because of my weight loss. Thoughts and experiences on the subject?

    The phrase is "as soon". As in "She would as soon run me over". Maybe it was your brain they were trying to put out of its misery.

    How incredibly rude.

    I guess elementary forum skills would have eliminated your double post. Perhaps you should take the time to consider your own mental acuity, rather than poking sticks at someone else's.
    Lesson to take from all of this:

    SOME people are *kitten*, no matter what their (or your) weight.

    Case in point above.

    Except that "...just assume..." and "...just as soon..." Have radically different meanings, and she meant "..just as soon..." Elementary life skills say it matters what you say and that you use the correct words.
  • Okay, so I have been fat and I have been thin, and/or fit. I have found that there are two types of discrimination. Discrimination from skinny people (mostly women) against fat women and the contrary - fat women against skinny women.

    I will tell ya, I have a new appreciation for women who have looked good their entire life. Having been on both sides of the discrimination, I have found that skinny women are far more tolerant of overweight women then the other way around. These days, heaven forbid should I want to cross the road and a heavy set woman is driving my way. She'd just assume run me over then let me cross. OR, if I am walking into a building behind an overweight woman, she'd just assume let the door hit me in the face than hold it. Things like this keep happening and happening to me. Although, when I was fat, I had a small degree of this from skinny women, the contrary far out weighs those experiences. I have had women say, very seriously, "I hate you" or "You B*&^ch" because of my weight loss. Thoughts and experiences on the subject?


    I've been fat my whole life. I don't discriminate against thin women at all. I envy them for taking better care of themselves than I have and look up to them for motivation to keep myself working so hard. Of course I do get discriminated against but I am positive some if not most of the time it's just my low self esteem biting me in the behind. I don't think it's any one group of people discriminating.. It's just whoever feels like being a mean grumpy butt in my opinion :). I never let the door slam in someones face although it does slam in mine sometimes. Woman saying those things to you are obviously just because they are jeleous it's perfectly fine to flaunt and be proud of what you have accomplished congrats. :)
  • angrydolly
    angrydolly Posts: 22
    I don't judge people for being fat or skinny.

    any judgement really comes from a point of concern when I see unhealthy patterns. (I am not the epitome of perfect health either) I would rather work out with an overweight person who really wants to shed it and get healthy, than someone who is just doing it to do it.

    It usually kills me to see someone eating themselves to death, but not in an angry way, more in an empathetic way, I can't imagine getting to that point. I certainly cannot imagine the work and dedication it takes to reverse from that point either, I felt overwhelmed after a few years of trying to loose the same 15lbs, and my husband telling me I needed a stair master.

    I've caught a lot of slack because I never got extremely over weight, and have always made attempts at keeping myself thinner (weight problems are big in one side of my family in the women especially; so I am paranoid) and since I've always been conscious of it, I do catch the "you don't need to" "you're already skinny" I even had one of my customers tell me after my victory of reaching my target weight that I "looked sick"

    people are people, they're jealous, envious, and we all have our weaknesses. Some manifest differently, some handle them differently. I taught myself a few years ago to not be bothered by those types of behaviors, and feel more for the person acting that way than take personal insult, it's a personal insecurity with them.
  • I don't have a skinny frame, more curvy/semi-toned, but I am personally sick of hearing the discrimination against skinny/fit women. I especially hate, "go eat a burger" or "real women have curves". Every time someone, female or male, bashes skinny women, I just think, "You're showing your insecurities, right now." You have to be not happy with yourself, to lash out & tear another person down, I feel. If you loved yourself, you would be trying to give others positive reinforcement and help uplift them. Whenever someone makes those comments around me, I have no problem telling them I find their comment uncalled for.
  • Can't say I've ever wanted to run over someone because of their weight.

    I haven't actually thought about maiming anyone that was thin, skinny or otherwise. But now that you mentioned it....

    All jokes aside, it's a matter of being comfortable in your own skin - with who you are and not exactly what you look like or what people THINK you should look like. There will be haters on either side of the scale: learn to appreciate your own body and simply take care of that particular temple. Don't worry about trying to fit into someone else's skin or hating because you can't.
  • jennfr1
    jennfr1 Posts: 4
    Dr. Phil once did a show about how extremely obese and extremely ugly people received avoidance from people. I was so moved by the ridiculousness of this plea for sympathy for fat and unattractive people given how nasty THEY (fat and unattractive people) are toward good looking and thin people that I wrote Dr. Phil asking him to do a show that uncovers how badly fat and unattractive people treat thinner and good looking people. I explained that as a good looking and thin women, I had enough hatred and nastiness thrown my way for absolutely no reason other than jealousy on the part of the hater that I could assure him he would have oodles of juicy footage and plenty to work with for the show WHEREVER he took his cameras and both ugly and good looking females were present. I've never seen a Dr. Phil show yet on the jealousy and hatred toward thinner good looking women. Its a shame because this hatred that fat and ugly people have toward good looking and fit folks needs to be exposed and acknowledged. Fat and ugly people at work make my life hell out of jealousy. Fatties and uggs make sure of it. Its a rare day that I leave the house and am not given the evil eye by multiple females, judged for being too skinny (I"m not skinny, I'm simply not fat), or am told something irrational about my appearance or conduct by some stranger female who doesn't even know me. I once applied for a job and was told by the fat and ugly hiring lady that I probably didn't need to work because my boyfriend took care of (I didn't even HAVE a boyfriend.) Insane and of course I didn't get the job. I can't count how many female friends I've lost because they were uncomfortable around me or suspicious of my intentions or infused with rage when men would strike up conversations with me in her presence. I've finally wised up after so many years of disrespectful and abusive treatment from fat and ugly women to stay away from them. They all present so sweet and kind of the surface, but they all eventually show their true colors. I try to limit my focus for friendships now to women who do not have weight issues and who appear to be comfortable and happy to live in their own skin and who don't sit around sizing up and leveling others. These women are not easy to find. Sad truth.
  • jennfr1
    jennfr1 Posts: 4
    ALL jealousy is rooted in the insecurity of the person whose feeling it. All jealousy. Not "some"
  • jennfr1
    jennfr1 Posts: 4
    It's easy to not be bothered by them when you're not taking the brunt of them on a daily basis. And what is "People are people"?
  • jennfr1
    jennfr1 Posts: 4
    Whose "flaunting?" Is walking around "flaunting?" Kind of like "breathing" and "existing." Right?
  • eric_sg61
    eric_sg61 Posts: 2,925 Member
    OP is from 2012…strong thread resurrection