Having a private diary seems so counter-productive to me....

24

Replies

  • c_bruna07
    c_bruna07 Posts: 4 Member
    I'm not worried about people seeing a binge day (I don't have them); I know that people are extremely judgmental of even healthy diets that do not match their own and I don't want to deal with it. If you spend two minutes randomly flipping through forum posts, you'll have no trouble finding people whining and criticizing and blatantly insulting others who don't happen to meet their standards for what a diet is supposed to look like. Pretty much daily, I see people with perfectly healthy diets accused of eating disorders, starving themselves, making stupid unhealthy choices, and so on. And those people eat a lot like I do.

    Honestly, I don't need help. I know what I'm doing. The last thing I need is a bunch of self-righteous food police who know nothing about me or my circumstances calling me names and telling me I'm an idiot. Don't get me wrong, I recognize that the majority of people aren't like that, but I'm not willing to open myself up to abuse from those who are.

    This.
  • victoria4321
    victoria4321 Posts: 1,719 Member
    I keep mine private because its a diary which is personal to me. Sometimes, I do open it up. When I'm eating terrible I lock it again. Sounds crazy but I dont want to feel like I have to eat a certain way to keep a good log. When I know I'm the only one seeing it, I log absolutely everything. If it was always public I might be swayed to add junk food as quick calories. So far i've logged everything for almost 300 days :smile:

    GREAT job at logging so faithfully... I still dont understand why you wouldnt keep open... is it b/c people give you crap about how little/ or too much you are eating? Thats the reason I keep mine open... I want the feedback from the success stories so one day I can be the success story... not arguing.. I really do just want to understand! Thank you for responding!

    Nah, I log around 1700 calories net, so around 2100 total on a regular basis. when I first started I logged in 1200 net because mfp said to. I Just dont really like on the days when I'm way over, like if I go out or something, for everyone to say "great job logging!" I know its a weird thing to be annoyed by but I dont understand the encouragement of negative behavior so i'd rather have no comments. Plus, I like to remember that i'm doing it for myself also.
  • jsp2374
    jsp2374 Posts: 131 Member
    Over the years I have had too many people be overly critical of the choices I make. Be it food or any thing else. I am very affected by criticism I get from others. It is something I try to let go, but for some reason I just can't. So my diary is closed. I keep it that way because I KNOW that if people said something to me that I would probably up and quit. Too many people in my life think they can do it better than me. That they can tell me how I SHOULD be doing things. SO for me it is better to just keep it private. I am doing what I need to do in order to lose the weight. I don't need anyone telling me oh you shouldn't have ice cream and malteasers every day for a week. Even though that week I actually lost 3 kilo's. That was also the week I decided to try this whole eating more to lost thing. It works for me. I have been losing a pound a week since then, unless it is that time of the month. I don't want to have to justify that though, and explain that. I know I don't get enough protein. I don't need anyone telling me that.

    I hope that made sense.


    Oh also, I find having the ticker at the bottom, of my posts to be a lot more helpful than an open diary. I want to keep seeing that number go down. SO I want to keep losing the weight.
    Jackie
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    I'm a few months away from graduating as a nutrition major, and I sure as hell know a lot more about what I'm doing than people commenting on my diary and giving me advice that's blatantly wrong.
  • I keep mine open for friends only cause if they do have questions I am there and know who has access to my info. So it is open just have to be a friend to see mine.
  • smkafka
    smkafka Posts: 134 Member
    I keep mine closed because I got a lot of harsh feedback about eating too few calories. I follow my Doctor's advice and it doesn't agree with a lot of others here on MFP. Although, I know most of them mean well, I just need to focus on what my doctor has said.
  • dinosnopro
    dinosnopro Posts: 2,177 Member
    Mine is open to friends only, but I rarely click the "finished logging" button. If someone wants to stalk me and call me out for the McDonald's food that I eat from time to time.......meh, that's their deal.
  • kazzari
    kazzari Posts: 473 Member
    It wouldn't occur to me to question someone's decision to keep their diary private or open only to friends. I think I may have glanced at one or two other diaries, just out of curiosity, but I wouldn't comment on the diary of someone who isn't a friend, anyway. My diary is open but I doubt anyone is looking at it, certainly no one has commented. I don't care one way or the other, I log to track calories and my sodium and potassium levels, not for opinions.
  • ChasingSweatandTears
    ChasingSweatandTears Posts: 504 Member
    Its a really personal part of your life to share with people you don't know....... Mine is open to my friends some days and some days it's not. Depends on my mood lol
  • CeeRawr89
    CeeRawr89 Posts: 328 Member
    I'm not worried about people seeing a binge day (I don't have them); I know that people are extremely judgmental of even healthy diets that do not match their own and I don't want to deal with it. If you spend two minutes randomly flipping through forum posts, you'll have no trouble finding people whining and criticizing and blatantly insulting others who don't happen to meet their standards for what a diet is supposed to look like. Pretty much daily, I see people with perfectly healthy diets accused of eating disorders, starving themselves, making stupid unhealthy choices, and so on. And those people eat a lot like I do.

    Honestly, I don't need help. I know what I'm doing. The last thing I need is a bunch of self-righteous food police who know nothing about me or my circumstances calling me names and telling me I'm an idiot. Don't get me wrong, I recognize that the majority of people aren't like that, but I'm not willing to open myself up to abuse from those who are.
    ^This, I could have wrote this exact reasoning for why my diary is closed. I have bad days, (who doesn't) I don't mean binge go over your calories, but the days where fatty foods are tasty to me, and salty foods are appealing, and where I just don't give a damn about what I am going to eat that day, also, if I have too few calories, I'm afraid I'll get crap.
  • RedHotHunter
    RedHotHunter Posts: 560 Member
    My diary is open to my friends. I think it helps keep me accountable. I'm also open to suggestions. If I ever started seeing a lot of negative comments about my food choices I would simply remove that person as a friend. Friends view and offer help. They hush up when you ask them to and if not, I dont need them "helping" me So "bye bye" LOL
  • Some people are just more sensitive, or private, than others. It's just a choice. You don't really need to understand it, just accept it.

    I'm private and don't care to share. Period. I don't have to explain myself to anyone. I'm here for me.
  • linzirussell
    linzirussell Posts: 116 Member
    i always have my diary open:). ive gone from 282 down to 166. some days i eat lots, some days i eat little, some days i eat just normally. just depends how im feeling lol, as long as i keep track of my weekly calorie consumption, i dont get fazed by my day-to-day one :) at the end of the day, if people are that bothered by my food diary being 'bad' or unhealthy, they shouldnt look at it :P
  • lunglady
    lunglady Posts: 526 Member
    Not everybody joined MFP for support and other people's opinions. Some of us just wanted a convenient way to watch our intake.

    Keep in mind that people on here have different goals and expectations.
  • lisao62
    lisao62 Posts: 80 Member
    My diary is private because the only person I need to be accountable to is myself. It has taken alot of years for me to figure that out.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
    As in life, on the internet we all choose our friends. I share with my friends. :-) To each his own, as they say.
  • Di3012
    Di3012 Posts: 2,247 Member
    I have mine open, I don't care who sees it or what they think of my grub lol, it is working for me and I will continue with it that way :D
  • 77tes
    77tes Posts: 8,521 Member
    When I started, I had my diary private. Then, I opened it to friends, and now it is public. However, what works for some doesn't work for others. I have a friend who stopped logging because comments made her self-conscious, so I suggested that she keep her diary private. Logging is the principal thing -- for yourself first.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    Mine is private. I find that having a private diary keeps me more honest about my logging. I don't feel that I need any help with my food choices, so having it open wouldn't be of any advantage to me.
  • cramernh
    cramernh Posts: 3,335 Member

    So I am trying to figure out WHY some people keep their diets private? I don't understand. I think by opening it for all, or at least your friends, opens up a missed opportunity if you have it closed!


    NOT judging, but for those that have your diaries private, what is the reasoning? I dont think the fear of ridicule for a bad day is an excuse... WE ALL HAVE THOSE DAYS! And on those days, my friends have rallied around me more than usual...and that's motivating..... just my 42 cents worth! Happy Saturday!

    This thread topic has been done way too many times to be honest....

    If a person using MFP wants to keep their diary private - that is their choice. They dont have to share it with anyone at all. There are people who may very well be under doctor's advice (Like I am)... and I tell people, friending me does not give you the free ticket to say anything about my daily intake because its none of your business - its the business between me and my Dermatologist and Endocrinologist. NO one has the right to comment on my diary. That is how I am using MFP - under the guidance of medical professionals.

    On the other side of things, I will not comment on anyone's diary, period. Its not my place until they have asked me for suggestions or opinions. Its none of MY business to make any comments. Its NOT my place to say anything at all.


    Some people have different views for theirselves - and people keep forgetting that its up to the individual on how they want to run their MFP account. Those same people keep forgetting to respect a person's right to make choices for theirself on how MFP will be used for them.

    It shouldnt matter why he/she has her diary locked up under private - you should be praising people who are using MFP as a weight-loss tracking tool. THAT in itself is a good decision!
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
    I try to be helpful in the public fora, but don't choose to share every detail of my life with strangers. As someone else said, I also don't feel like having my food choices assessed; I'm reasonably to very well informed about nutrition. When I eat badly, I KNOW IT.

    I log for my own benefit.
    NOT judging, but for those that have your diaries private, what is the reasoning?

    Yes, you are judging, or you wouldn't have opened this topic. I hate it when people back off from their own judgments. As it happens, I don't agree with this judgment and don't care.
  • woou
    woou Posts: 668 Member
    People do whatever works for them. :flowerforyou:
  • janehen12
    janehen12 Posts: 162 Member
    My diary is private because the only person I need to be accountable to is myself. It has taken alot of years for me to figure that out.

    This. I've wasted far too much time in all aspects of my life trying to please everyone. I feel myself skipping things when its open, to try and look better. I'm far more honest when its closed.
  • jenj1313
    jenj1313 Posts: 898 Member
    To each their own... mine's open and no one gives me crap, even when I DO eat like crap, but I don't post on the forums complaining that I didn't lose weight when I know exactly why. I'm also usually the first one to admit that my choices were bad.

    At any rate... what I don't get is people who have their diary open, eat 500 calories in a day, then ignore everyone who asks what's up with eating so little? I don't say "good job" when people come in under their calorie goals but haven't eaten anything all day... I constructively call them out. But, I rarely get a reply or answer. They just keep doing the same thing. I don't delete them b/c I feel like you never know when a positive change will come, but it does seem fruitless at times.

    And when someone whose diary is locked comes in under their calorie goal, I just say something like "hope it was a healthy day". Maybe they don't need any other feedback to stay motivated :-)

    Jen
  • nanatsuiro
    nanatsuiro Posts: 30 Member
    I have mine set to private because I log everything in spanish and I eat homemade meals that are typical of my country, so not many people would understand what I'm eating.
  • SweetProgression
    SweetProgression Posts: 65 Member
    you do have people here who just DON'T get that 1200 is a minimum... I don't have time to hit 1270 or 1300 and someone tell me I went a little over as if they don't see the message at the bottom stating being under is NOT a good thing! So I keep mine closed? I'm rough enough on myself don't need more
  • autumnk921
    autumnk921 Posts: 1,374 Member
    I used to only have mine open to friends on here but I decided to open it publicly one day when I started a topic & was asking for help...I knew people would want to see it to help me with my question...I just decided to keep it open b/c I don't have any secrets...I eat what I eat....I like that my friends do hold me accountable & it does help me to eat a little better b/c I know that others will see it & I can't complain about not losing weight if I am cramming candy bars down my throat - so if I keep it open I won't eat those candy bars...It's that simple for me. Some people are just more private & don't want any criticism - I don't mind it really - as long as it is constructive & not belittling to me or anyone else on here.... :happy:
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member

    Those that have their diets open and have been successful, some losing HUNDREDS of pounds, gives us (the ones that are just starting and needing to learn and lose) so much info by peeking at your food diaries! Or, like me, and clueless or not, have your diary open, and not making the best choices, but having it open, others can HELP you! I can not count how many people have offered suggestions as to what would be some better choices as far as protein, or what my carbs should be....

    If you need help, I suggest you make a request that someone look at YOUR diary. You don't need to randomly access the diaries of people who, for whatever reason, want their records kept private.
  • w2bab
    w2bab Posts: 353 Member
    This website can be used for a plethora of reasons, and while many are here for the purpose of support/guidance, not all of us want it in that matter. I'm happy getting support through chatting with my friends, or in group discussions. Frankly, I'm quite content having my diary 100% private because I'm not interested in what other people think about my eating habits (nor do I think it's anything worth sharing for the sake of helping others). I log for my personal record.

    I understand that others, though, want accountability and guidance and tips on how to improve -- and that's fine. But I don't find my habits counterproductive because I don't see how having it open would be productive for my reasons :)

    This, exactly. My food diary is for me to track what I eat. Nothing more. I've lost 32 lbs. since mid January, so apparently it's working for me.
  • lucylousmummy
    lucylousmummy Posts: 348 Member
    My diary is private because the only person I need to be accountable to is myself. It has taken alot of years for me to figure that out.

    i agree completely with this
    i also find it weird when somebody is saying "great job" on a persons diary that has burgers, fries, and ice cream all in one day, but is way under calories, but pulls somebody up as having a bad day for going over on protein.