Annoyed with families comments....

2

Replies

  • sunshinedazed
    sunshinedazed Posts: 61
    I'm kind of on the opposite end. A guy I work with makes comments constantly and tends to laugh when I talk about working out and dieting. I feel as though he is mocking me and it infuriates me! We had a luncheon the other day for "Administrative Whatever..." Secretary's Day. He brought an entire container to my desk and asked if I would like a trough to eat from... :explode: I was livid and couldn't come up with a something witty. My sister to ask him next time if he would like a feeding tube to eat from. HAHAHA Good luck on those come backs... I'll work on mine as well! :tongue:

    Sweetheart, you don't need a witty comeback. You could be walking away with his job. This is harrassment. It is vile, evil, and disgusting. Report him to HR. Over and over, if that's what it takes. And though it might sting your pride a little, ask a coworker who has witnessed it to report him, too. You DO NOT have to tolerate a hostile workplace.
  • jenluvsushi
    jenluvsushi Posts: 933 Member
    Bottom line....misery loves company. They are just jealous. You keep doing you (as long as it is healthy) and let the others hate if they want. Why waste your energy on their bad attitudes? I haveissues like this in my life as well and I have learned to just ignore it and not talk about it with those that are not supportive.

    By the way....I had very similar complications in my last two pregnancies....I weighed 20 pounds more after giving birth with all my water weight....it was horible!
  • mrs_kurz
    mrs_kurz Posts: 185 Member
    I have begun to just learn who and who not to talk about weight with. My mom's a great person I can talk with but besides that and my fiancé, it's basically just people on here.

    Many people don't want to hear about how well others are doing - it's totally ridiculous but true. Maybe figure out who can actually be supportive and then don't bring it up in front of those who aren't. It's tough especially because you're super proud of yourself and by explaining your accomplishments it's almost like, "I did this, so why can't you?" - Not negative, but you want to kind of give people tips. People don't want tips though lol.

    Keep doing what you're doing and don't listen to people. It's YOUR body, your choice. As long as it's being done healthily, I see no issues.

    ^THIS, basically how I feel. I've had people recently telling me not to lose anymore weight, and while I realise it's a compliment, it doesn't make me feel any better! Anyway rant over. For the record I'm currently 144, and ideally want to be 126!
  • norwpam
    norwpam Posts: 5
    I'm kind of on the opposite end. A guy I work with makes comments constantly and tends to laugh when I talk about working out and dieting. I feel as though he is mocking me and it infuriates me! We had a luncheon the other day for "Administrative Whatever..." Secretary's Day. He brought an entire container to my desk and asked if I would like a trough to eat from... :explode: I was livid and couldn't come up with a something witty. My sister to ask him next time if he would like a feeding tube to eat from. HAHAHA Good luck on those come backs... I'll work on mine as well! :tongue:

    Oh my word girl! I've never encountered such a rude person! I'm so sorry you have to put up with that. Consider going to HR about him. What an *kitten*!!!!!
  • reztib
    reztib Posts: 151 Member
    Some people will nitpick every little thing. Just be healthy.
  • KaciWood19
    KaciWood19 Posts: 396 Member
    I'm kind of on the opposite end. A guy I work with makes comments constantly and tends to laugh when I talk about working out and dieting. I feel as though he is mocking me and it infuriates me! We had a luncheon the other day for "Administrative Whatever..." Secretary's Day. He brought an entire container to my desk and asked if I would like a trough to eat from... :explode: I was livid and couldn't come up with a something witty. My sister to ask him next time if he would like a feeding tube to eat from. HAHAHA Good luck on those come backs... I'll work on mine as well! :tongue:

    That's harassment in the work place!!!! I would have kicked his @$$!!!!!!!!!
  • papergirl22
    papergirl22 Posts: 21 Member

    "Why do you have to be soo thin, dont you think you will give your daughter a complex?"




    Response: "Well, it's my job to give my kid SOME kind of complex, so I guess I'll just pick being healthy and embracing life, rather than teaching her to make others miserable with my own self pity, like SOME people (here, at the table, in the room, insert whatever you like)."

    It all comes from one place with these kinds of comments: People being so wrapped up in their own self hate and lack of motivation that they simply can't allow others to be successful whether its weight loss or other goals. Some people just can't be happy for others success. People like this make the short list of folks I don't spend a lot of time with. There is no room in my life for toxic people....theres enough other stuff to derail my progress.
  • _Bob_
    _Bob_ Posts: 1,487 Member
    "Do you really need to look anorexic?" Anorexic and fit are very different

    "Why do you have to be soo thin, don't you think you will give your daughter a complex?" Yeah I'll bet she's going to hate having a mom that is able to play with her and keep up.

    "There is nothing wrong with looking like a MOM" Mom jeans might look cool, but they are also a sign of giving up on yourself, is that the right message for your daughter.

    "Shouldnt you focus less on yourself" yeah again, is that the message you want you daughter to pick up.

    "Youre already so skinny, if i sat on you, you'd die" well, sounds like they have a problem there.

    My wife get's the same crap because she is naturally skinny. when she hit close to 100lbs because of stress it was bad but she is always between 115 and 120. when she started hitting the weights with me she went up form 110 to 118 and dropped to a size 3. so yeah her family is stupid and gives her *kitten* for it. we don't talk to them much anymore or I just make fun of them, and then they don't talk to us.

    my fam though, we're all huge. but I weight the most and always have. but in a different way at 300lbs my brothers look like I did at 400. so now I'm smaller than most of them but I still out weigh them :)
  • lg3703
    lg3703 Posts: 190
    I'm kind of on the opposite end. A guy I work with makes comments constantly and tends to laugh when I talk about working out and dieting. I feel as though he is mocking me and it infuriates me! We had a luncheon the other day for "Administrative Whatever..." Secretary's Day. He brought an entire container to my desk and asked if I would like a trough to eat from... :explode: I was livid and couldn't come up with a something witty. My sister to ask him next time if he would like a feeding tube to eat from. HAHAHA Good luck on those come backs... I'll work on mine as well! :tongue:
    O.m.g... that is totally unacceptable. There are no words to "come back" with. Do you own a taser? & NO- I'm not joking.
  • EmCarroll1990
    EmCarroll1990 Posts: 2,832 Member
    I'm kind of on the opposite end. A guy I work with makes comments constantly and tends to laugh when I talk about working out and dieting. I feel as though he is mocking me and it infuriates me! We had a luncheon the other day for "Administrative Whatever..." Secretary's Day. He brought an entire container to my desk and asked if I would like a trough to eat from... :explode: I was livid and couldn't come up with a something witty. My sister to ask him next time if he would like a feeding tube to eat from. HAHAHA Good luck on those come backs... I'll work on mine as well! :tongue:
    O.m.g... that is totally unacceptable. There are no words to "come back" with. Do you own a taser? & NO- I'm not joking.

    This.
  • belgerian
    belgerian Posts: 1,059 Member
    Ive had ppl tell me im too skinny and look anerexic. I eat around 2000 to 2500 calories a day I run for 1 hour 5-6 days a week plus I walk alot for work and up and down stairs. So on average I do have a deficit far from manarexic (term my daughter used). They are all just overweight and out of shape themselves and used to seeing people getting heavier as they get older not fitter as they get older. Makes them insecure to see some one do it. Believe me I still have plenty of bodyfat to go around.
  • Maryaly40
    Maryaly40 Posts: 551 Member
    I'm kind of on the opposite end. A guy I work with makes comments constantly and tends to laugh when I talk about working out and dieting. I feel as though he is mocking me and it infuriates me! We had a luncheon the other day for "Administrative Whatever..." Secretary's Day. He brought an entire container to my desk and asked if I would like a trough to eat from... :explode: I was livid and couldn't come up with a something witty. My sister to ask him next time if he would like a feeding tube to eat from. HAHAHA Good luck on those come backs... I'll work on mine as well! :tongue:

    that sounds like harassment-I'd report him!
  • DatEpicChick
    DatEpicChick Posts: 358 Member
    I'm kind of on the opposite end. A guy I work with makes comments constantly and tends to laugh when I talk about working out and dieting. I feel as though he is mocking me and it infuriates me! We had a luncheon the other day for "Administrative Whatever..." Secretary's Day. He brought an entire container to my desk and asked if I would like a trough to eat from... :explode: I was livid and couldn't come up with a something witty. My sister to ask him next time if he would like a feeding tube to eat from. HAHAHA Good luck on those come backs... I'll work on mine as well! :tongue:
    O.m.g... that is totally unacceptable. There are no words to "come back" with. Do you own a taser? & NO- I'm not joking.

    This.

    ..could you imagine just sitting in your cubicle and all the sudden you hear this little 'man squeal' from the cubicle next to you.... hahahahahaa
  • sevsmom
    sevsmom Posts: 1,172 Member
    I would just look at them with total confusion. As though the words they said made no sense.

    On a similar post, I mentioned a lady that i see regularly at my house who goes to my church. She said that "fat people aren't going to want to come to our church any more. You guys make us feel bad." Like a handful of people who take fitness seriously (at a church of 3,000+ attenders) would be the reason for someone to not come to our church?!?!

    I just looked at her totally confused. Then I mentioned that most of our church reflects the community we're in weight wise.

    Some people haven't learned the lessons most mom's try to teach their 5 year old. . .if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.

    Good luck! Hope you reach your goals. I'm sure you look fantastic!
  • kooldill
    kooldill Posts: 21 Member
    use it as insperation to keep you going
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
    I'm kind of on the opposite end. A guy I work with makes comments constantly and tends to laugh when I talk about working out and dieting. I feel as though he is mocking me and it infuriates me! We had a luncheon the other day for "Administrative Whatever..." Secretary's Day. He brought an entire container to my desk and asked if I would like a trough to eat from... :explode: I was livid and couldn't come up with a something witty. My sister to ask him next time if he would like a feeding tube to eat from. HAHAHA Good luck on those come backs... I'll work on mine as well! :tongue:
    O.m.g... that is totally unacceptable. There are no words to "come back" with. Do you own a taser? & NO- I'm not joking.

    This.


    ^^^^^ Totally inappropriate in the office (or for anywhere for that matter) but especially an office setting. Grounds for firing in my opinion. At the very least a stern warning about office etiquette and warning in writing to be placed in that employees HR folder!
  • HappyathomeMN
    HappyathomeMN Posts: 498 Member
    Potential answers:
    "Do you really need to look anorexic?"
    Anorexic isn't a look it's a disease

    "Why do you have to be soo thin, dont you think you will give your daughter a complex?"
    There is a difference between thin and healthy - I'm teaching my daughter to be healthy

    "There is nothing wrong with looking like a MOM"
    Good thing I look like a MOM then!
    Yes, and my daughter will know how good mom can look!

    "Shouldnt you focus less on yourself"
    Maybe you should focus more on yourself!
    Good thing there is less of me to focus on then

    "Youre already so skinny, if i sat on you, you'd die"
    If you tried to sit on me, I'm fast enough/smart enough to get out of the way first.
    Well, that says more about you than me, doesn't it?

    Also - congratulation on your success!!! And congratulations to your husband on his HOT wife, and your daughter on her gorgeous mother!! You've worked hard and overcome a lot - enjoy your accomplishments:drinker:
  • bushs99
    bushs99 Posts: 37 Member
    This journey is about you...and you are the only one who's opinion matters. You've decided to make life changes so that you can be healthy. And this is a great thing!

    Don't let these other people bring you down, they are so not worth it. Congrats on taking care of yourself and keep doing what your doing, you are the only one that counts.
  • mamamc03
    mamamc03 Posts: 1,067 Member
    I'm kind of on the opposite end. A guy I work with makes comments constantly and tends to laugh when I talk about working out and dieting. I feel as though he is mocking me and it infuriates me! We had a luncheon the other day for "Administrative Whatever..." Secretary's Day. He brought an entire container to my desk and asked if I would like a trough to eat from... :explode: I was livid and couldn't come up with a something witty. My sister to ask him next time if he would like a feeding tube to eat from. HAHAHA Good luck on those come backs... I'll work on mine as well! :tongue:

    Sweetheart, you don't need a witty comeback. You could be walking away with his job. This is harrassment. It is vile, evil, and disgusting. Report him to HR. Over and over, if that's what it takes. And though it might sting your pride a little, ask a coworker who has witnessed it to report him, too. You DO NOT have to tolerate a hostile workplace.

    I couldn't have said it better myself! These are the things I fear might happen to me and I KNOW people have probably said behind my back at work. Definitely report him!!
  • Fabnover40Kat
    Fabnover40Kat Posts: 300 Member
    I can relate!! When I did my first 5k ....my MOM asked why are you doing that? Seriously!! and then she says well your getting way too thin! IM NOT THIN AT ALL! LOL!
  • speedyf
    speedyf Posts: 1,571 Member
    You did fabulous, don't stop training and eating healthy!!

    All of those people don't even deserve a response from you. And remember the quote below, that's what I do when people try to knock me down.

    "A positive attitude will not solve all the problems in the world, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort."

    :flowerforyou:
  • forsettii
    forsettii Posts: 29
    Make yourself happy. I was always trying to please everyone.

    I want to lose weight, not to get Jacked. I want to take my shirt off and not be embarrassed in public.

    I want to set an example for my kids that if you want something you can do it.

    I want to get to a normal BMI, I want to live to a ripe old and an enjoy life.

    Live for yourself is what i am trying to say. Be happy. :-)
  • 2befit2
    2befit2 Posts: 58 Member
    lucky for you being a mom we have the ability to tune people out :laugh: unhappy people tends to make rude and mean comments that's why they do that, just smile and show them how happy where you at that will make them more pissed off:drinker:
  • karendsmith
    karendsmith Posts: 167
    Agree, there are only certain people who can appreciate the hard work we are dong to make ourselves happy and healthy. Be proud of your accomplishments and don't pay attention to the negative comments! You deserve to be YOU and feel confident! Hold your head high and SMILE!!!:happy:
  • sarahdee2007
    sarahdee2007 Posts: 257
    I know when I was bigger and my thinner friends would talk about working out, it would just make me feel worse about myself for not working out! I talk about it all the time now and get similar comments/offers of breadsticks. Ignore them.
  • Susabelle64
    Susabelle64 Posts: 207 Member
    "Youre already so skinny, if i sat on you, you'd die" Then maybe you should join me at the gym



    ROFLMAO!!! Love this one!!!

    My daughter has a similar issue with childbirth, + diabetes, and two prior lost babies in pregnancy. She now has a beautiful little boy, he is the joy of our lives and is 15 months old. She also has an excess of weight that needs to go. I will never tell her she is too thin, as I know the feeling.

    My husbands family was like this last time I lost weight and now I look back and just get mad. We now live close to my family which are much more supportive to healthy lifestyle. Sometimes I wonder if these people aren't in some way trying to pay you a compliment, poorly done if they are, but still. There are some really hateful people out there that just dont get it. Just look around us, obesity is an epidemic in this country, we need more people like you to show us the way to healthy living and being an awesome example to your daughter about how to be healthy.

    All I have to say is keep your chin up and get yourself healthy and feeling healthy. That is the gift that keeps on giving. My dad is 78 years old and can out run, out bike, out hike most men half his age......this is from a lifetime of exercise and good eating. He was a health nut when it wasnt cool to be a health nut, wish I would have paid more attention earlier but hey, our bodies are remarkable and can achieve what we request of them.
  • RoseMarie157
    RoseMarie157 Posts: 17 Member
    These people don't have a clue what you are going through. They have not been in your shoes. Only you know how you should feel about your weight. Just keep doing what you are doing. You are doing great.
  • XXXMinnieXXX
    XXXMinnieXXX Posts: 3,459 Member
    So frustrating when your overweight and people are harsh, then they are harsh when your loosing it. I've come to realise they'll always be harsh and to ignore it! X
  • JB5349
    JB5349 Posts: 135 Member
    You don't see me naked.. I have used that a few times and it shuts people up

    I also tend to say you can make your choices and I can make mine, that stops them too
  • MJ7910
    MJ7910 Posts: 1,280 Member
    Okay so the basis is.... I had a terribly complicated pregnancy, and almost lost my life... i was in the hospital for 23 days after having my little girl, and then i went home with husband and her!

    ...i was around 117-120 when i got pregnant, and WITH water weight gain (while in the hospital) and swelling i topped at 252 pounds, and was 199 pounds when i went in to have the baby.

    .... When i started to lose the weight (after being released from the doctor) i weighed myself for the first time and was 163 pounds. And that was last march, and i was doing really well, then summer started, and i got depressed about it, and i gave up until decemeber.

    Starting January 23, 2012 i have been COMMITTED. I went from 155 pounds to 133 pounds (today) since then and i've been determined to keep losing.

    And so far i feel like I LOOK GREAT. I can wear a tee shirt (with yoga pants but not jeans...muffin)... and i can wear tank tops and not be too self conscious... I mean, i KNOW there is a huge difference, but i want to be happy with MY body... so im looking to lose between 5-10 more pounds, but it depends on how much i feel i need to lose.

    I dont want to look like i did when i was in high school, and at this point in my weight loss journey, my focus is on TONING. On keeping motivated and going on walks with my daughter, because i can NOW!!!! =D

    So... here is my issue... and i'm sure some of you have this issue too....especially when you tell people the goals for your weight...

    "Do you really need to look anorexic?"

    "Why do you have to be soo thin, dont you think you will give your daughter a complex?"

    "There is nothing wrong with looking like a MOM"

    "Shouldnt you focus less on yourself"

    "Youre already so skinny, if i sat on you, you'd die"

    .... =[

    and these are the same people that on Christmas day were telling me that i should commit myself to losing weight and really get on it.... and now that i have done just that, they tear me down, especially when i say 5-10 more pounds, even though i'm figuring i will lose that much on just toning at this point, which is what i want....

    sooo my question to you lovlies on this site.... what are some witty comebacks? or maybe just ways that i could get my family off my back.... i mean, my best friend (who is pregnant right now) is totally rooting me on (but we were both thin, so she knows how i feel), but everyone else is like asking me if 'i'm okay' and if 'im eating'.... its like if i'm at a birthday party and turn down the crap they are serving, i get stares.... like i'm starving myself or something....

    so how would you handle this? i mean, how unsupportive can you be! They were rude and unsupportive when i was fat, and now they are rude and unsupportive when i'm so close to my goal... WTF is wrong with people.

    it's like i wrote your post. i also turn down cake at times and other junk. and this is tough with some family members. i try to just deal with it, but it's so annoying. also the thing about it being ok to "look like a mom" i don't understand this idea that "looking like a mom" means overweight. i think i can be fit and be a mom too... they are not mutually exclusive. i don't have any advice, but can relate.

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