Fight with personal trainer at the gym

tobnrn
tobnrn Posts: 477 Member
in Fitness and Exercise
Ok so this morning I got into this huge fight with my personal trainer. Im not new to lozing weight or fitness. I had always been active. I eat well for the most part. 3 yrs ago I was 16% BF. Well with my marriave ending, start of career and making sure my family/kids adjusted well I stopped taking care of me. Put on about 40 lbs and went up to 35% BF. Now everything is settled and back to working on me. Did a month of straight cardio to build up my endurance and decided to start lifting again. I have always been a big believer in lift heavy. Work on large muscle groups. More lean muscle mass, more fat burning. I love free weights but being gone so long wanted a trainer to verify form and just to have a spotter as well. I interviewed several at my gym. Found one that seemed at the time to have the same beliefs. I was sooo excited. Score. Had my first workout and was like yes. Every workout since has been low weight (for me) high reps like 15-20. He wanted to do arms. I questioned him about back and chest. Large muscles. He said your a girl. What does that have to do with anything. So we did arms high reps. Then another work out mostly hiit cardio with stairs. I reiterated that Im there to lift, not do stairs or cardio. I didnt drive all that way for that. Then this morning the same crap. I asked him if I was a man would he work me different. Well yeah. We would do free weights. I asked if he heard of NROLFW. Of course but you need this cardio and machines. Besides you dont want to bulk. Are you serious. I than said I want to do squats and deadlifts today. Again I got your a girl and would do better on the machines. Needless to say he is fired and I had a long talk with the general manager of the gym.
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Replies

  • Pearl0105
    Pearl0105 Posts: 35 Member
    I hear you! Same thing happened to me on my first session with my PT! Stairs really? I told him I wasn't paying him to run up and down the stairs or cardio. I needed help with my strength training. The good thing is he listened and ever since he has been 'killing' me with core and strength training. I do my cardio, warmups and cool downs on my own.

    I hope you find another one that will listen to you and accommodate you. Its your money!
  • tobnrn
    tobnrn Posts: 477 Member
    I just cant get over the whole "free weights are for men. Your a girl". WTF.
  • Fit_Canuck
    Fit_Canuck Posts: 788 Member
    It's like any profession there are good personal trainers who are truly knowledgeable about their field and some that are just plain bad. Hopefully you will find one that helps you reach your goals, the one insulting thing about a bad trainer in addition to waste your valuable time and energy is that they take you typically for large sums of money and provide no guarantee of results.
  • hiker282
    hiker282 Posts: 983 Member
    I have two words that I'd share with your trainer if I were in your shoes "You're fired!"
  • knk1553
    knk1553 Posts: 438 Member
    I had a trainer at the gym for about 2 months (the gym pissed me off for various reasons with raising rates and not giving what they promised so I ended my membership) but he kicked my butt, hardcore. We would do a lot of bodyweight stuff but also add in heavy weight small reps. I remember doing lat pull downs that if I didn't engage my muscles it would literally pull me straight up out of the seat. Thats definitely not ok as a trainer for him to not listen to what you want and adjust your program accordingly, you're paying him!
  • toriaenator
    toriaenator Posts: 423 Member
    OMG what a total prick!!! its well-known that squats and deadlifts are two of the best possible strength things for women to do! this guy obviously has no idea what he's talking about; its almost impossible for women to become "bulky" anyways! wow good for you, i hope he gets fired. i HATE when people assume girls can't do the same free weights as guys; other *kitten* is just a waste of time and won't give results >:(
  • onedayillbeamilf
    onedayillbeamilf Posts: 966 Member
    wow
  • monty619
    monty619 Posts: 1,308 Member
    yeh that trainer is an idiot... if women trained more like men do they would have more success in the gym. (heavy weights/ progressive overload)
  • harrietlg
    harrietlg Posts: 239
    This is why I have a woman personal trainer who has been in my shoes and knows exactly what i should be doing because she did it herself. She's also really chatty which makes the pain more bareable lol but because she knows me now she pushes me harder, she's crazy and she's an amazing zumba instructor too but I needed someone to relate too who would bust my *kitten* but knows exactly what I need!
  • HorrorChix89
    HorrorChix89 Posts: 1,229 Member
    What gym is that? I'll hire him and actually pay the $40 a session fee
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    It's a shame that after all that he turned out to be a douche.
  • redpat74
    redpat74 Posts: 33
    You are soooooo righteous girl!!!!!!
  • myak623
    myak623 Posts: 615 Member
    What gym is that? I'll hire him and actually pay the $40 a session fee

    So you'd waste money on a guy that doesn't know what he's talking about?

    There is no reason why he had her doing only light weight high reps and cardio. She asked for compound lifts and he not only refused by made a sexist comment that those weren't lifts for women.
  • Rayman79
    Rayman79 Posts: 2,009 Member
    What gym is that? I'll hire him and actually pay the $40 a session fee

    ummm, why? :huh:
  • k8lyn_235
    k8lyn_235 Posts: 507 Member
    what an a** and an idiot! he needs to do some reading and also realize he is working for his clients and should listen to what they want!! i'm hoping to start with a trainer soon, it is a woman and she has done some body building, so i'm assuming she'll be more open-minded than your trainer because i also want to lift heavy!
  • JBennis1013
    JBennis1013 Posts: 377 Member
    Wow!! What a jerk!! Any trainer I have ever had has told me that they don't want to waste my time doing cardio cuz I don't need them to do it. If he was doing these things for rational reasons...I'd say ok...but to use the excuse you're a girl is a crock of *kitten*. Get a new trainer!!
  • delonda1
    delonda1 Posts: 525 Member
    Wow that is such a shame! I would def complain and make SURE to be in his face showing how much a "girl" can lift.
  • k8lyn_235
    k8lyn_235 Posts: 507 Member
    What gym is that? I'll hire him and actually pay the $40 a session fee

    So you'd waste money on a guy that doesn't know what he's talking about?

    There is no reason why he had her doing only light weight high reps and cardio. She asked for compound lifts and he not only refused by made a sexist comment that those weren't lifts for women.

    off topic, but i couldn't help notice your WVU ticker! that's where i went to college :)
  • tobnrn
    tobnrn Posts: 477 Member
    Ive had good and bad trainers in the past. Hence the interview process. At least my gym is gonna get me another trainer. But still. I hate that my little mom & pop gym got bought out by a huge national chain. But hey cant beat the price of membership. They had to grandfather in my rate.
  • tabulator32
    tabulator32 Posts: 701 Member
    What I don't understand is how you went past one session with him without pulling the BS card on him and telling him you weren't getting what you paid for.

    :smile:
  • HorrorChix89
    HorrorChix89 Posts: 1,229 Member
    What gym is that? I'll hire him and actually pay the $40 a session fee

    So you'd waste money on a guy that doesn't know what he's talking about?

    There is no reason why he had her doing only light weight high reps and cardio. She asked for compound lifts and he not only refused by made a sexist comment that those weren't lifts for women.
    It's my preference, and you have yours. TYVM Ma'am
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,989 Member
    Ok so this morning I got into this huge fight with my personal trainer. Im not new to lozing weight or fitness. I had always been active. I eat well for the most part. 3 yrs ago I was 16% BF. Well with my marriave ending, start of career and making sure my family/kids adjusted well I stopped taking care of me. Put on about 40 lbs and went up to 35% BF. Now everything is settled and back to working on me. Did a month of straight cardio to build up my endurance and decided to start lifting again. I have always been a big believer in lift heavy. Work on large muscle groups. More lean muscle mass, more fat burning. I love free weights but being gone so long wanted a trainer to verify form and just to have a spotter as well. I interviewed several at my gym. Found one that seemed at the time to have the same beliefs. I was sooo excited. Score. Had my first workout and was like yes. Every workout since has been low weight (for me) high reps like 15-20. He wanted to do arms. I questioned him about back and chest. Large muscles. He said your a girl. What does that have to do with anything. So we did arms high reps. Then another work out mostly hiit cardio with stairs. I reiterated that Im there to lift, not do stairs or cardio. I didnt drive all that way for that. Then this morning the same crap. I asked him if I was a man would he work me different. Well yeah. We would do free weights. I asked if he heard of NROLFW. Of course but you need this cardio and machines. Besides you dont want to bulk. Are you serious. I than said I want to do squats and deadlifts today. Again I got your a girl and would do better on the machines. Needless to say he is fired and I had a long talk with the general manager of the gym.
    Then you would love me. It's all about the heavy weight lifting baby!



    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • choirgirl1130
    choirgirl1130 Posts: 80 Member
    i am a trainer and i would have fired that trianer :( the unfortunate fact of the industry is that ANYONE can get certified and be a trainer...doesn't mean they know what they are doing....good for you! i'm sure you will find what you need to motivate you and get you to your goal!
    best wishes to you on your journey :)
  • Denjo060
    Denjo060 Posts: 1,008
    I do a powerbarz class with a female trainer she is awesome she has us using 10 to 20 lb weights for our triceps and does a lot of back and chest exercises with a bar that weighs 13 lbs alone and you add the weights to it She is awesome and very motivating Keep working it girl way to go
  • superstarcassie
    superstarcassie Posts: 296 Member
    Your trainer should definitely listen to your goals and desire to lift heavy!! Good job for standing up for yourself! :) Now time to find a new person to get your lift on!
  • sexforjaffacakes
    sexforjaffacakes Posts: 1,001 Member
    That's insane. What an eejit. I'd be demanding my money back!
  • tobnrn
    tobnrn Posts: 477 Member
    First session was great. We were doing 215 lb leg presses and crap. I was stoked cuz I didnt think I could still lift that much. Than 1 week crap. Talked to him about it then. Figured I would give it another go hoping he heard my concerns.
  • taso42
    taso42 Posts: 8,980 Member
    Nicely done. I would consider this a NSV for you. You used your knowledge to hire a trainer who was full of crap.
  • KBGirts
    KBGirts Posts: 882 Member
    Find a new trainer. Find a female trainer that has similar goals. I think male trainers for the most part are going to go easy on you, or they are going to try to shape you into what he thinks is the ideal body for a woman. I had a female trainer once and she was AMAZING!!!! She pushed me, and we did a lot of weight lifting - the kind you are talking about wanting!! I never bulked up.... I only got strong and toned and lost weight.
  • KBGirts
    KBGirts Posts: 882 Member
    Find a new trainer. Find a female trainer that has similar goals. I think male trainers for the most part are going to go easy on you, or they are going to try to shape you into what he thinks is the ideal body for a woman. I had a female trainer once and she was AMAZING!!!! She pushed me, and we did a lot of weight lifting - the kind you are talking about wanting!! I never bulked up.... I only got strong and toned and lost weight.

    Not all male trainers would have this attitude.... I shouldn't stereotype. I did work with a dude a couple of times when my trainer was out and he was really good. Still prefer the girls though.

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