Ignorant friends...

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  • chevy88grl
    chevy88grl Posts: 3,937 Member
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    Ah yes. Jealousy is a nasty little monster. I used to hear comments like this ALL the time. I'm not as strict with myself now that I'm in maintenance, but when I was actively losing people would say things like that all the time to me. I'm fully aware that eating a candy bar, cookies or whatever won't kill me - but I just don't want it. There's no crime in not wanting to eat excessive amounts of crap food.

    You're doing a great job and she's likely jealous that she doesn't have the willpower or determination that you have. I've found that the ones who give you the hardest time are the ones who are usually the most unhappy with how they look and feel. They see you being happy with your success and try their best to bring you down to their level so they don't feel so alone in their unhappiness. Don't let them get to you.
  • shannairl
    shannairl Posts: 65
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    You keep doing what you're doing, and remember you're doing it for YOU xxx

    I have had everything from "you're obsessed with food, just eat a damn pizza" to "you're going too far, you'll get an eating disorder" to "you've lost enough now, stop" - I'm 195 pounds FFS I'm not a size -0!!!!!!!!! A neighbour met me on my walk and actually asked me "you're out walking every day, are you trying to lose weight? You'd want to watch you don't get paranoid about it." - COME ON.

    I genuinely think that when you're stuck in a rut, and you're miserable, you attract friends that are in the same mindframe. When you start to better yourself, they get unnerved because they see you moving outside of that "woe is me" mindset.

    When I started my weightloss journey last year I had a friend who was very supportive until I started losing weight and she stalled. She quit the class, she'd send me a text whenever she was having a Chinese, she'd ring me on my weigh-in day complaining about how awful she felt and how she'd never lose weight. It used to drag me down for the whole day, regardless if I'd lost or gained. I actually ended up cutting her out and it spurred me on even more to do this for ME.

    And breathe :D Can you tell this hit a nerve?! ;-)
  • austindog2
    austindog2 Posts: 128
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    I have had everything from "you're obsessed with food, just eat a damn pizza" to "you're going too far, you'll get an eating disorder" to "you've lost enough now, stop" - I'm 195 pounds FFS I'm not a size -0!!!!!!!!! A neighbour met me on my walk and actually asked me "you're out walking every day, are you trying to lose weight? You'd want to watch you don't get paranoid about it." - COME ON.

    Yes!! I've had a lot of people tell me that I'm doing well, but my mom seems to be the most concerned and keeps reminding me that my weight is getting too low and she thinks I'm developing an eating disorder. Admittedly, whenever I start something new that I'm excited about I can get a little obsessive, but I've mellowed out A LOT on the calorie counting since those first couple of weeks. I'm 5'10'' and 153lbs right now - I'm not focused as much on losing weight anymore, just toning and losing the belly pudge that I've had since I can remember. I want to wear a bikini, damn it!

    We shouldn't let anyone get us down - we're doing this for US, not them :)

    Thank you everyone for listening to my little rant - it helps a lot to know that I wasn't just getting worked up about nothing. This is such a great community!
  • Ianultrarunner
    Ianultrarunner Posts: 184 Member
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    Just needed to get something off my chest from breakfast this morning -

    I'm an RA in a college dorm, so I work very closely with my other hall staff - we live, eat, and work together. Naturally, most everyone knows that I've been trying to lead a healthier lifestyle by watching what I eat and working on self-control. One of the people on this staff is one of those people that eats whatever they want (breakfast today was two chocolate chip muffins, pizza, and soda) and then she complains about gaining weight.

    She didn't eat the top of one of her chocolate muffins at breakfast and I was craving something sweet, so I asked her if I could have a small piece of the crunchy part just to satisfy that craving. She made a face when I only took a piece and put the rest back on my plate and she said "You can eat the whole thing, you're not going to die" really rudely. I was sort of taken aback because everyone knows how hard I've been working, and I am fully aware that I won't die if I eat the whole piece of muffin, I just didn't want to.

    I'm trying to tell myself that she's just jealous of my ability to control what I eat and eat sweets in moderation, but it still hurts when someone takes a stab at my hard work - especially when they know how hard this adjustment has been for me. I'm trying not to let it bug me because I know it's little and it's not worth wasting energy over, I just wanted to get it off my chest to people who might understand why it's bugging me! :)
    I've also had similar comments made and I've learnt to tune them out.
    Negative people like that also should realize that sometimes that looking at them makes me not want to be like that again.
    If they really cared they would keep quiet and should think to themselves how they wish they had that sort of self control.
  • rahrahrita
    rahrahrita Posts: 225 Member
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    My dad is the worst! My mom and I both try to eat well, and my dad always has to make a comment like "That's all you're going to eat? That's rabbit food. How does that fill you up? If I ate that I'd have to go to Taco Bell and eat a real meal later. Black bean brownies? That probably tastes like crap."
    Or if I eat at around 3pm, he'll say "What meal is that? Lunch or dinner? And you're gonna eat dinner too?"

    UGH. I love my daddy, but sometimes I just wish he would keep his mouth shut!

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