I dont drink Alcohol

jesshall281
jesshall281 Posts: 219
edited December 18 in Motivation and Support
Hello,

I am a non drinker, not for the health reasons (although that's an added benefit of not drinking) but because i just dont like the taste of it, and i know people who abuse it and i dont want to be like them.

Im getting really tired of meeting people, going to events, seeing my family and having this pressure to drink alcohol. I have maybe half a glass of wine one a year on my birthday, just to stop people bugging me about it. I dont like how when i meet people for the first time, they put so much pressure on me, as if i wont be able to have fun if i dont drink, or that im miserable and boring, its very upsetting. (they call me boring to my face, even though im a very happy person with a sense of humour, without the drink doing it for me)

Is there anybody else who doesn't drink here? what do you say to people when they almost try to force it down your neck so you can 'have fun'?

When i say 'oh sorry, i dont drink' they have a face of dissapointment, buy me a alcoholic drink anyway, and i get really annoyed at that.
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Replies

  • BeautyAndTheGeeks
    BeautyAndTheGeeks Posts: 109
    I drink, but I'm choosing not to drink for all of May to save a bit of extra money for my holiday and assist my weight loss. Also, to prove to myself that I can go out with my friends and have fun without spending loads on cocktails and wine. It's only been a week and it's been incredibly hard. People look at me like I have two heads when I say I'm not drinking this month, a bunch of my guy friends insisted on buying me alcoholic drinks on saturday night despite me saying I'm not drinking and then they got angry when I didn't drink them because I wasted their money - like really, are you freaking kidding me?!
  • KungfuPanda14
    KungfuPanda14 Posts: 17 Member
    I don't drink either. (I never really enjoyed the taste of alcohol or the affects)

    I used to have the same issue as you when I was at Uni so I can understand where you are coming from; it really made me feel like a loser when I wouldn't drink. I guess as time went by I just became more confident in the fact that if I don't want to drink, I won't. Nowadays when I meet people and tell them I don't drink, a lot of people find it admirable.

    If you're out and about and someone asks you why you're not drinking, just smile and say "I'm not a fan of alcohol, but I'll have a diet coke if you're offering" ;)
  • annlouise2
    annlouise2 Posts: 25 Member
    Jess also a non drinker for the same reason as you i just dont like it. I have never really drunk alcohol but i am older than you (31) and what i can say is it will eventually get better, people will stop going on about it and accept it. I got it a lot more when i was younger. I've been on girly holidays Ibiza, Magaluf, countless hen nights and lots of party places with my friends and managed to have the time of my life without it. My husband drinks but he totally accepts that i dont and has never made me feel like I must-plus he like the free lifts home when we've been out-no taxis for us :) just ignore the pressure, it'll soon disappear xx
  • USAF_Trooper
    USAF_Trooper Posts: 2
    If you're out and about and someone asks you why you're not drinking, just smile and say "I'm not a fan of alcohol, but I'll have a diet coke if you're offering" ;)

    Love it!! :D
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
    I drink very VERY rarely, and when I do, it's an expensive mixed drink I get with a very nice dinner when I go out with my husband. I only like mixed drinks because they can hide the taste of alcohol almost completely so I can tolerate it. I like once in a while to have one just to relax a little and be a little goofy, but I hate the feeling of being "drunk". I just like a very light buzz if / when I do drink at all. My husband is the same way. Both of our fathers were alcoholics. His father passed away from the toll the drinking took on his organs at a very young age. Mine passed away at a young age as well, not because of the alcohol but I know it couldn't have helped his condition any. So, we rarely drink. Once or twice a year, if that.

    You shouldn't be pressured into drinking by anyone. That's seriously not cool. What kind of person tries to make someone else drink? I'd be very offended by some of the things you have experienced... so would my husband. I guess some people just don't understand how the world works. You don't have to be drunk or under the influence of drugs to be fun or "have a good time". Sheesh. There actually ARE people in this world who can be entertaining with only their natural wit, humor and creativity.
  • TurtleCrush
    TurtleCrush Posts: 80
    Non-drinker here too. I know the feeling. Sounds like you need a new circle of friends. My friends are boring like me and love to go for a walk, movie, skating, swimming. I eliminated everyone out of my life that doesn't support my new lifestyle. Hard, but better for your health in the long run. :) Smiles!
    Big hugs,
    Rebekah
  • runnercheryl
    runnercheryl Posts: 1,314 Member
    I don't drink. I don't have the experience of having people question it or try and force me, though. In my experiences, people appreciate having a sober person to deal with general health and safety and to offer lifts. I just tend to keep an eye out, enjoy the night as much as everyone else, and get people home safe at the end of the night without them having to deal with the cost of a taxi - who'd encourage you to drink when they're getting a lift to their door, free of charge? :happy:

    Designated Driver duty is the answer.

    Edit: That said, I don't actually like going for nights out that are drink-focused. I tend not to, and only go when there's a meal or bowling involved or it's a special occasion.
  • js25698
    js25698 Posts: 42 Member
    I don't drink either. I don't really like the taste AND I've seen too many people do stupid things or get hurt because of it. When I am out with people and they find out that I don't drink I usually get a shrug of the shoulders or a slightly raised eyebrow. That's about it. True friends will understand. Jerks will push it. Stick to your guns.
  • Package02
    Package02 Posts: 97
    Agree 100%. I just don't enjoy the taste of alcohol whatsoever. It tastes gross to me. I remember I was invited to a friends kickback and was told to "just bring whatever you wanna drink". I brought chocolate milk lol needless to say that led to a lot of jokes but jokes don't phase me. I don't need to be drunk to have fun. I'll often get called some of the same things you mentioned, such as "boring" simply because I'd rather not drink. I suggest you just find a group of friends with interests closer to your own, at least that's what I did. It's actually kind of ironic that I don't like alcohol because my family owns a couple bars around the city here XD
  • wendyannie1976
    wendyannie1976 Posts: 205 Member
    I don't drink, rarely have since I was 18 just never enjoyed it, hated the thought of wasting money on it I can have as good a time without drinking and probably better the only way I could find to stop the bugging was to offer to drive them home :-) that doesn't always work but I just ignore it - we all get ribbed for something and I have no problem in being ribbed for being healthy :-)
  • jesshall281
    jesshall281 Posts: 219
    im so glad im not alone!

    Thanks for all your responses, i wouldn't say its my close friends, they understand. But a work outing for example (in South Africa, its all about how much you can drink, so there is a lot of negativity towards me). Or even when you go to a club because I DO like to have a good time, and you order a water, and you get ridiculed by the barman because he thinks your on some kind of drugs drinking water.

    Anyway, i have my dads wedding coming up in 2 weeks, and he is incredibly proud that i dont drink, but there will be a few people my age there who will be, but I will rise above it and be proud that i have a near perfect liver :laugh:
  • stayxtrue
    stayxtrue Posts: 1,186 Member
    I do not drink and have not for sometime... PLus it messes with your metabolic rate which in the end sucks for building muscle and so on... Plus I just dont see the appeal of being drunk and losing control
  • athensguy
    athensguy Posts: 550
    I do not drink and have not for sometime... PLus it messes with your metabolic rate which in the end sucks for building muscle and so on...

    I don't know where you got that one.

    Anyway, I drink moderately, primarily because so much research indicates that it is a life extending and health improving practice.
  • tehzephyrsong
    tehzephyrsong Posts: 435 Member
    Not to interrupt the sober circlejerk happening here, but I'm just chiming in on the behalf of folks who *do* drink but aren't a**holes about it to those who don't. If your friends give you grief about not wanting to drink with them, find new friends.

    As far as pushy guys in bars go, "No thanks, I'm driving tonight" is an effective refusal of both the explicit offer of a drink and the implicit offer of sex.
  • ElizaRoche
    ElizaRoche Posts: 2,005 Member
    The only stuff Id have..... is baileys, a piña colada (both of these cause I love the flavor), or beer on a really hot day. I dont drink to have fun at parties, i rarely go to parties or clubs/bars anyway..
  • jesshall281
    jesshall281 Posts: 219
    Not to interrupt the sober circlejerk happening here, but I'm just chiming in on the behalf of folks who *do* drink but aren't a**holes about it to those who don't. If your friends give you grief about not wanting to drink with them, find new friends.

    As far as pushy guys in bars go, "No thanks, I'm driving tonight" is an effective refusal of both the explicit offer of a drink and the implicit offer of sex.

    circlejerk?

    Not heard that word before, hoping it isnt rude.

    I never said people who drink are a**holes, and i never said the people who put pressure on me are my close friends. I also never said i get chatted up.

    So thank you for your very defensive input.
  • dreamshadows
    dreamshadows Posts: 734 Member
    I never drink the stuff. The smell of beer turns me off. Not interested in trying anything else.
    Designated driver is about my speed, but I'm never at bars. The few friends I have that do enjoy alcohol respect that I don't drink.
  • emmalecras
    emmalecras Posts: 79 Member
    I am a non-drinker by choice but have no problems with people drinking around me - at least I remember all the stupid things that happen when they are drunk!!

    All of my friends know that I choose not to drink (although I will have a sip occasionally) and there is no pressure.
  • aquasw16
    aquasw16 Posts: 342 Member
    OR (if you are from the US) tell them, HELLO I am not 21~ I can't drink!
  • dreamshadows
    dreamshadows Posts: 734 Member
    im so glad im not alone!

    Thanks for all your responses, i wouldn't say its my close friends, they understand. But a work outing for example (in South Africa, its all about how much you can drink, so there is a lot of negativity towards me). Or even when you go to a club because I DO like to have a good time, and you order a water, and you get ridiculed by the barman because he thinks your on some kind of drugs drinking water.

    Anyway, i have my dads wedding coming up in 2 weeks, and he is incredibly proud that i dont drink, but there will be a few people my age there who will be, but I will rise above it and be proud that i have a near perfect liver :laugh:

    when at a bar, I tip the barman for my glass of water, and tell him I'm the DD tonight. They are good with that. Actually they are usually surprised to be tipped for water.
  • runnercheryl
    runnercheryl Posts: 1,314 Member
    Not to interrupt the sober circlejerk happening here, but I'm just chiming in on the behalf of folks who *do* drink but aren't a**holes about it to those who don't.

    I think a lot of us non-drinkers already did that. :tongue:
    Relaaaaax. Nobody's criticising! :flowerforyou:
  • dreamshadows
    dreamshadows Posts: 734 Member
    OR (if you are from the US) tell them, HELLO I am not 21~ I can't drink!
    Canada it's 19, except Alberta, Manitoba, and Quebec which it's 18!
  • bluemist248
    bluemist248 Posts: 207 Member
    I also don't drink any more, most of my friends have accepted this and don't say anything about it, but others can get really aggressive with it. if anyone tries to talk me into whilst I'm in the pub I just say to them "If you think me not drinking is annoying, you should see yourself when your a drunken, unintelligible, spew-covered mess. In fact, you should be grateful that I tolerate that crap whilst I'm sober. Now back off and let me drink my water". That never fails to shut them up :laugh:
  • slimpickings36
    slimpickings36 Posts: 20
    I totally know what you mean I do like a drink but have decided to only have a drink on a friday night (not binge drink ) but my husband drinks every night of the week I have tried talking to him about it but its up to him. Well to cut a long story short I said to my hubby last night I have really bad period pains he replyed get some wine down you that will make you feel better I replyed no thanks I,m not drinking which made him say you being boring then which I could of lost it but I just walked away I just wish people did,nt think being happy and fun revolves around alcohol. Stick to your guns and don't give in if you don't want to drink then don't
    good luck x
  • GemmaRowlands
    GemmaRowlands Posts: 360 Member
    I don't drink either. I do like the taste of some alcoholic drinks, but when I discovered how many calories they had in them I just thought no, this is so not worth it. The amount I eat per day NOW could be consumed in just two glasses of what I used to drink! Wasted calories. So I haven't drunk for almost three years now.

    Like you, I will have a glass of wine on my birthday and Christmas/New Year. This is INSANE when you think about it, because people think you have them as a "treat" but you don't even LIKE them! You're only drinking them to shut people up!

    On my 21st last year, my parents and friends were all like "we have to buy you a bottle, it's your 21st, what do you like best?!" but that was pointless because I would never drink it!

    I don't preach to people why they SHOULDN'T drink alcohol (even though there are several reasons) so I don't see why others feel the need to preach to my why I SHOULD.
  • jaxxie
    jaxxie Posts: 576 Member
    OR (if you are from the US) tell them, HELLO I am not 21~ I can't drink!
    Canada it's 19, except Alberta, Manitoba, and Quebec which it's 18!
  • bluemist248
    bluemist248 Posts: 207 Member

    I don't preach to people why they SHOULDN'T drink alcohol (even though there are several reasons) so I don't see why others feel the need to preach to my why I SHOULD.

    Yes, exactly. If I sat in the pub telling my friends why I don't think they should drink then I would expect the aggressive backlash telling me to drink. Instead, I just sit there as normal with my water and never bring it up. I'd say 95% of of my social circle will just accept it but there's always a few that feel the need to question and tease me about it.

    A bit like when you resist the cakes at the office and return to your desk to eat an apple. There's always that one co-worker that finds it to be joke material.
  • FoxyMcDeadlift
    FoxyMcDeadlift Posts: 771 Member
    I quit drinking to run a marathon, which i recently completed. During the progress, everyone understood that i didnt want to smash it and then run 20 odd miles hungover and my friends totally abused me as the designated driver ( i also made small profits). I went out for one post marathon bender on saturday, and i've decided its probably not worth it, a drinkers famous words are "never again" But i might come over and join you. No one calls me boring, i think a fair few people call me obsessive behind my back. Their requirements to always be hammered to enjoy a friday night shows a lack of imagination, alcohol can enhance, but shouldnt rule.
  • taliesyn_
    taliesyn_ Posts: 219 Member
    OR (if you are from the US) tell them, HELLO I am not 21~ I can't drink!
    Canada it's 19, except Alberta, Manitoba, and Quebec which it's 18!
    Here in the UK it is 18 also.

    I ~do~ drink infrequently and I can count on the fingers of one hand the number of times I have been drunk my whole life (I'm 48). I am considering giving it up completely - one thing that concerns me though is the designated driver thing. I don't want the guys to think I am a free taxi who they can keep out as late as they wanna be out (often 3-4am) and then have no respect for the inside of my vehicle (if you understand me). I really don't mind driving them, as long as the hours are reasonable and I am not cleaning the result of THEIR debauchery from MY car (and living with the smell that, no matter how much you clean, seems to stick around way past funny).
  • tehzephyrsong
    tehzephyrsong Posts: 435 Member
    Not to interrupt the sober circlejerk happening here, but I'm just chiming in on the behalf of folks who *do* drink but aren't a**holes about it to those who don't. If your friends give you grief about not wanting to drink with them, find new friends.

    As far as pushy guys in bars go, "No thanks, I'm driving tonight" is an effective refusal of both the explicit offer of a drink and the implicit offer of sex.

    circlejerk?

    Not heard that word before, hoping it isnt rude.

    I never said people who drink are a**holes, and i never said the people who put pressure on me are my close friends. I also never said i get chatted up.

    So thank you for your very defensive input.

    Sorry, Reddit habit. "Circlejerk" in the sense I used it refers to a conversation wherein the only thing anyone expresses is some variant of "I am in agreement with that statement." It's mostly pointless because there's no real discussion going on. When I hit reply, basically all of the posts in this thread were basically "I don't drink either!"

    I also never said people who drink are a**holes, fullstop. People who drink AND GIVE YOU A HARD TIME ABOUT NOT DOING SO are a**holes, it doesn't matter how close you are with them. It's good that your close friends don't bother you about your preferences, but some people aren't so lucky, and that was the audience to whom "get some new friends" was directed. Others have also replied to this thread. I am acknowledging them and the situations they describe as well.
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