What do you tell people...

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DBell28
DBell28 Posts: 45
in Motivation and Support
When you go out to eat and they all make comments bc you are ordering a salad/veggies/something healthy? I eat very clean and watch what I eat and there are certain people in my life that when I go out with them make comments like "why are you eating a salad" "you can afford to eat a slice of bread" (yeah I know but maybe I just dont want to), "you are obsessed" (why, I chose to eat healthy?). I am not one of these people who asks for things like a plate of lettuce with no dressing, I just eat clean and watch what I eat to maintain my figure. I wish people would stop making comments just because I chose not to eat dessert sometimes or bc I actually just want to look good.

I'm not sure if its a jealousy thing with people and I am not saying that to sound egotistical either, but its getting annoying and I dont understand why people feel the need to comment on what I chose to order or eat. I don't do this to other people, so why is getting done to me? Thoughts?
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Replies

  • phinphanbill26
    phinphanbill26 Posts: 574 Member
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    I find that those comments usually come from people that can't control their own eating habits. It's their own guilt that causes them to comment. I tell them that I enjoy what I'm eating and I know it likes me back.
  • LAWoman79
    LAWoman79 Posts: 348 Member
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    "Obesessed" is just a word lazy people use for the dedicated. If your friends are that rude, they are either jealous, or just jers, so I'd drop them.
  • iplayoutside19
    iplayoutside19 Posts: 2,304 Member
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    I would look them in the eye and tell them it's not any of their business how you order....unless they're paying for it.
  • therealangd
    therealangd Posts: 1,861 Member
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    The comments will stop. Eventually people will never remember that you didn't always eat healthy. Eating healthy is the minority. Unhealthy people genuinely don't understand.
  • kfitzpa
    kfitzpa Posts: 326
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    I get this done to me all the time. Everytime I pass up a cookie or a cupcake I get the "You skinny *****, you can afford to eat that cookie!" It drives me insane but at the end of the day that's WHY I'm skinny/happy so it doesn't matter.
  • bellygoaway
    bellygoaway Posts: 441 Member
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    I don't have to say much, I just point out the belt loop I used to fit in, and show them where it is now.
  • kristen6022
    kristen6022 Posts: 1,926 Member
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    I just tell them I like the healthy food better. And now, I do. Bread is just not worth it some days. Appetizers aren't either.

    Or I just say "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels" and they usually shuts them up...
  • 1nsanity
    1nsanity Posts: 95 Member
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    a friend did this to me one time. without looking away from my menu, i (somewhat smugly) replied, "just cause you dont wanna look like a fatass eating an overloaded burger while i am eating a salad, doesnt mean you have to be negative about it. let me order what i want and shut the **** up"

    he hasnt said a word about what i eat since. be harsh, be brash. if your friend cant support you, then screw em. stay positive yourself! psychologically your friend wants to be on the same "level" as you. if they feel you are more esteemed than them, they will either gain confidence themselves and come up to your level, or bring you down to theirs. dont let them bring you down.
  • sexycheesemonkey
    sexycheesemonkey Posts: 196 Member
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    Many people tend to feel threatened by someone eating different...because it forces them to evaluate how they themselves are eating. And by trying to make you eat similar foods to what they eat, is a way of generally making themselves feel better about eating in a way they know is most likely not good. Being the big girl in my group of skinny friends, they have never said anything about how I eat, and now that my eating has changed they are less inclined themselves to have dessert, or to order an appetizer as well as a large entree. When someone is placed in a situation that makes them comfortable the first natural instinct is to make it more comfortable...and to somehow take control.

    It's probably nothing personal against you, just tell them that you would prefer not to have whatever they are suggesting. It doesn't make you obsessed...it makes you in control of what goes into your mouth, instead of being controlled by whatever cravings you might have, or whatever emotions might dictate that you should be consuming.
  • tony2009
    tony2009 Posts: 201 Member
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    I have on more than one occasion I was aloud to order my food and get what I wanted. That's when I'm in a good mood. I've also had friends who I thought were jealous of me and my success so I just tell them to go to hell. They stopped asking me about food choices. ^_^
  • AmadaLynn
    AmadaLynn Posts: 116
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    I get this sometimes too... "That is all you're going to eat?" I just yea, it fills me up and I feel healthy. If you have a problem with it, oh well!

    You do just have to be harsh though.
  • jennifer52484
    jennifer52484 Posts: 888 Member
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    Just tell them that you are healthier than you've ever been. Tell them you had a filling lunch or breakfast. or that you have a photo shoot in the morning lol..
  • MaryDreamer
    MaryDreamer Posts: 439
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    That's a good question I've never really had to deal with because usually I'm having a spike or cheat day when I'm with others LOL When I'm with my immediate family I eat healthy and they don't question it, they support me. But you've got me thinking now, how to react to negative comments of others not on your fitness path. My immediate co-workers are health conscious too so no problem there. I guess I'd say something like "my body, my business" LOLOL
  • Skyla08
    Skyla08 Posts: 32 Member
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    I am on the other side of this...people at work pass around sweets all the time and now that i'm on track to eating healthy they all look at me like "WTF why isn't the fat girl taking the treats" it's almost like people just assume that because I am overweight I will eat sweets, or go for seconds, or take the last piece of cake?? At this point I really don't care what they think, I am doing this for me and my health. You shouldn't have to explain why you order what you do, or why you turn down sweets or what not. What you put in your body is your choice, and I do not feel the need to explain it at all! :)
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
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    I don't say anything. I don't talk to people about what kind of diet I'm on. I eat by myself, usually, and if I go out and order a salad people don't usually say anything.

    I DO however have a coworker who will comment on all the "healthy" things I do. If she asks what I ate for lunch, I say "salad with chicken" the response is "oooh you're so HEALTHY". If she asks what I'm doing over the weekend, and I say "I'm riding my bike", she starts talking about what great exercise that is. Thanks, I had no idea. I get that she's trying to be nice, but she is OBSESSED with making comments about health and fitness and it gets really overwhelming when I'm just trying the best I can to NOT obsess over these things.
  • Lauren8239
    Lauren8239 Posts: 1,039 Member
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    I don't say anything. I don't talk to people about what kind of diet I'm on. I eat by myself, usually, and if I go out and order a salad people don't usually say anything.

    I DO however have a coworker who will comment on all the "healthy" things I do. If she asks what I ate for lunch, I say "salad with chicken" the response is "oooh you're so HEALTHY". If she asks what I'm doing over the weekend, and I say "I'm riding my bike", she starts talking about what great exercise that is. Thanks, I had no idea. I get that she's trying to be nice, but she is OBSESSED with making comments about health and fitness and it gets really overwhelming when I'm just trying the best I can to NOT obsess over these things.


    Maybe she's hoping you'll invite her for that bike ride? Or invite her to the joys of healthy eating? She might be to shy to ask you outright...........
  • umachanxo
    umachanxo Posts: 926 Member
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    If someone asks me that question, I smile, and I simply state, "Because this is what I enjoy. Why did you choose to order [insert their meal here]?"
  • AmyM713
    AmyM713 Posts: 594 Member
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    Nothing what I eat doesn't concern anyone but me and my body.
  • Merrychrissmith
    Merrychrissmith Posts: 238 Member
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    Next time I am just going to ask gently " Why does it make you uncomfortable?' when someone questions my food choices. Gotta use a neutral, kind tone so it doesn't sound snarky. i really would be interested in an honest answer but low expectations. :-)
  • bellyake3
    bellyake3 Posts: 135 Member
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    When you go out to eat and they all make comments bc you are ordering a salad/veggies/something healthy? I eat very clean and watch what I eat and there are certain people in my life that when I go out with them make comments like "why are you eating a salad" "you can afford to eat a slice of bread" (yeah I know but maybe I just dont want to), "you are obsessed" (why, I chose to eat healthy?). I am not one of these people who asks for things like a plate of lettuce with no dressing, I just eat clean and watch what I eat to maintain my figure. I wish people would stop making comments just because I chose not to eat dessert sometimes or bc I actually just want to look good.

    I'm not sure if its a jealousy thing with people and I am not saying that to sound egotistical either, but its getting annoying and I dont understand why people feel the need to comment on what I chose to order or eat. I don't do this to other people, so why is getting done to me? Thoughts?

    "you are obsessed"...obsessed is the word the weak give the determined..don't let them phase you..I get looks and sly comments from waiters asking me "is that all your gonna eat"..It actually makes me giggle inside now..be strong and stick to your guns..you are the only person that's gonna take care of you..no one else.

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