sabotage, betrayal and moms

My Mum's kind of like this but kind of the opposite. She's on a diet herself, but she's aparently restricted her calories to just 1100 a day (according to her - I know, I told her that's way too low, but would she listen?). Anyway, she drinks pepsi Max and adds powdered milk to her coffee - wasted calories on both counts if you ask me - and when we were staying at her house on holiday, she pretty much matched me at every meal. I was clocking in at around 1800 cals a day but doing some exercise - she was not. And she wonders why she can't lose the weight? She can't even be honest with herself over what she's eating and drinking (oh, and there was a Southern Comfort an dlemonade in there too!), and can't see that she's derailing herself without even realising it. Not only that, but I seriously had to watch what she was putting on my plate or I would have been way over calories myself. I actually had to keep taking things OFF my plate - LOL!

Comic Sans - the most evil font in all creation (besides Papyrus) :laugh: / :sad:

Comic Sans - the most evil font in all creation (besides Papyrus) :laugh: / :sad:

Evil font, for evil moms!

My husband, who has lost half a person already and is very food conscious now, will be like "Hey, you want a poptart? I'm craving a poptart, but I don't want to eat both," right after he just watched me eat my sandwich and fruit cup for lunch. And when I say no he won't eat it and then will try to make me feel bad for not eating half of the poptart by saying stuff like "Well, guess they'll just sit up there and gather dust then." Seriously, wtf? I ended up throwing them out.

Also, his work rotation is that he goes out to the field for three days and comes home for three, right (Air Force)? Every day he travels in he wants to go out to eat. Ok, I'm fine with that. I've gotten to where I can ignore the appetizer of chicken tenders he always orders and eat my salad or the low cal food item they have on the menu. What I hate is that when he goes to pay (we always go to Perkins), he always buys one of the pies (a whole one) from the display case and it just sits in the fridge! He'll only eat a piece of it and then be all "Wow, that's really filling. Better only have it once a week," but he doesn't eat the rest! Weeks later, I usually end up throwing it out because it just sits there, staring me in the face.

I mean, I understand he can have his treats because he is totally fit and a dedicated runner now, but have a little consideration for the poor chick still struggling, you know? And, yes, I told him my frustrations and he was all "Sorry, won't happen again." ...And yet it still does. All I can say is I got so much will power I could use it to build a new Great Wall. xD

If you can do so without being tempted, cut the remaining pie into individual servings, wrap and freeze for when he returns home. Then remind him it's there so he doesn't buy another pie. Just a thought...:flowerforyou:

Personally, I'd chuckle at the heavy cream because I prefer it -- it's much lower carb than milk!! Fat does not make you fat, people!

But as far as the lying & the sabotage... that's really, really messed up. What kind of parent would do that kind of thing?? I imagine your mom's got a serious case of jealousy. As a parent I can't even begin to comprehend acting that way.

From now on, take control of all your meals, ignore comments, and if the food isn't what you want, send it back or don't eat it. If she lies, just say, "No, that's not true, I saw you pour it" etc and leave it at that.

Make sure to often comment about how happy you are, how much you love your life, how great the diet is going... that should absolutely kill her.

My mother did the whole deceptive thing saying she was putting one thing in when in fact, it was something entirely different. Only the last time she pulled her trick, it damn near landed me in the hospital.

I cannot, under doctor's orders consume breads, flours, rice, pasta or corn. I cannot digest these foods, in fact it sends my insulin levels so high that Im borderline heading into Insulin Shock - my pancreas has a difficult time 'shutting off'.

Nearly every dish she made had one or two of these items. I ended up grabbing the garden salad and some boneless chicken to go on top of it and that was it. The look of horror from her when I didnt grab from her macaroni salad, the potato salad, the ear of corn... none of it was grabbed and she kept asking me "why wont you eat"... I looked at her and said "Mom I have enough on my plate as it is"... she kept coming at me with the typical "you dont eat enough, thats not enough food, whats wrong with the food"....and then... "you arent listening to that quack doctor of yours again, are you?"....

I put down my fork, picked up my car keys and started to walk out of the house. I could hear her now begging me to stay, and I simply walked out.

Later that day, she called me all teary eyed, the same manipulative words coming over the phone.... I got so fed up with it. She asked me why I walked out without saying a word. I told her "As much of a nasty person you have become, I didnt want to stoop to your level and say things that would come out wrong"... I did tell her why I left and I told her 'you have no right talking to me the way you do. If you cant accept 'no thank you' for an answer, not attack me for the things I have to do or the doctor that I see who is the only person who has my health held seriously, then Im not visiting you anymore - plain and simple. I dont need your negative talk and I dont need to eat anything I dont want or cant have. You need to show me some respect and understand that Im willingly choosing to listen to my doctor - that is a lesson that you have yet to learn and follow for your own health"...

An hour later, it still didnt 'sink' in to her head. And to be quite frank, I really dont care. Im in charge - of me. I determine what I want, dont want - its not her job nor her place. And I most certainly wont let her manipulation get to me. My own DAUGHTER wont go visit her because she does the same thing to her!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She knows she can come to my home on her visits and be comfortable knowing I wont push food on her. Thats not the right way to show love. I dont care what generation you come from.. .its wrong!

My hubby will try to be nice and pick up food he knows I like.. or a bottle of coke, etc...

I generally only eat cereal for breakfast.. this morning.. he got up before me and made a huge ham and cheese omelet for breakfast, then guilted me into making half.