What would you do about your daughters friend who . . . .

_EmmaStrong_
_EmmaStrong_ Posts: 647 Member
edited December 2024 in Chit-Chat
My daughter has a friend, with whom she had been friends with since she was 8, she is now, almost 14. Her friend spent the night with her last Saturday. Now, my daughter can't find her IPOD. I have searched her room, completely, and have not found it. In fact, I have searched the whole house. My daughters friend, was the only one, other than the two of us, who has been in our house. I really suspect that she stole it. She had stolen things from my daughter before, but that was a couple of years ago, and I really felt that she was maturing and would not do that kind of thing again. My daughter has had her IPOD for 3 years and has NEVER misplaced it . She had one place where she consistently put it. She has had a cell phone for 3 years and has never misplaced it or even so much as dropped it. She is very reliable with her gadgets.

What should I do?
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Replies

  • ItsMeRebekah
    ItsMeRebekah Posts: 909 Member
    tell your kid to ask her friend. then go from there
  • JPod279
    JPod279 Posts: 722 Member
    Waterboarding tends to get results. Well, that or have your daughter confront her. It is her friend. Next step, talk to her mom.
  • LuckyLeprechaun
    LuckyLeprechaun Posts: 6,296 Member
    you can ask, and she will deny it, and your daughter still won't have an ipod.

    Kinda sucks to see your kids learn these tough lessons, but the lesson from this is: when you have been stolen from, you decide to trust that person again in the future at your peril.

    Maybe you'll get lucky and the other parent will find it. But even that's not too likely, since 14 yo's are pretty good at being sneaky if they want to, and it sounds like she is like that.
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    I would have your daughter say to her friend something like this, "Hey, did you happen to see my iPod when you were here? I know it was here, but now I can't find it". I wouldn't start out by accusing her. If her friend says she has no idea (which is likely), I'd have your daughter say, "Well, that sucks because my mom says if my things disappear when friends come over, I can't have them over again".

    Like Lucky said, she probably won't get it back but at least she's let her "friend" know she's not welcome back.
  • Il_DaniD_lI
    Il_DaniD_lI Posts: 1,593 Member
    Call her friends mom and say your daughter thinks she may have left her iPod there.. could she take a look for you.
  • WifeNMama
    WifeNMama Posts: 2,876 Member
    Call her friends mom and say your daughter thinks she may have left her iPod there.. could she take a look for you.

    Yup!
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Call her friends mom and say your daughter thinks she may have left her iPod there.. could she take a look for you.

    Yup!

    Agreed.
  • brph26
    brph26 Posts: 207 Member
    Call her friends mom and say your daughter thinks she may have left her iPod there.. could she take a look for you.

    This....or call her mom and say that you think it may have gotten mixed in with her daughters things when she spent the night, and see if she can search around for it.
  • fraser112
    fraser112 Posts: 405
    Drop a hint about it being marked with a special uv sensitive paint so anyone who has it wont get far cause it stays on you for weeks,
    work it in as a joke
    hint your gona needa contact the police and her daughter might be needed incase she seen anything, woried someone might have broke in
    she get checked ect just a procaution.
    mum knows shes a thief
    it turns up in mail box.
    problem
    :laugh:
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    Call the girls mother. You could call the police.

    If the girl doesn't have her own ipod already she may have sold it, so check pawn shops and places that would let you turn in ipods for cash.

    Seems rational.
  • Cyngen
    Cyngen Posts: 557 Member
    My Ipod has the ability to be tracked online if it's turned on, as well as giving it a lock code. It's part of Apples program.
  • MyTime1985
    MyTime1985 Posts: 456 Member
    Call her friends mom and say your daughter thinks she may have left her iPod there.. could she take a look for you.

    This....or call her mom and say that you think it may have gotten mixed in with her daughters things when she spent the night, and see if she can search around for it.

    This is what I would do!
  • DestroyTheOpposition
    DestroyTheOpposition Posts: 444 Member
    I would have your daughter say to her: "Hey, when you are done borrowing my iPod let me know. I use it almost every day."
  • rockerbabyy
    rockerbabyy Posts: 2,258 Member
    Call her friends mom and say your daughter thinks she may have left her iPod there.. could she take a look for you.
    This....or call her mom and say that you think it may have gotten mixed in with her daughters things when she spent the night, and see if she can search around for it.
    I would have your daughter say to her friend something like this, "Hey, did you happen to see my iPod when you were here? I know it was here, but now I can't find it". I wouldn't start out by accusing her. If her friend says she has no idea (which is likely), I'd have your daughter say, "Well, that sucks because my mom says if my things disappear when friends come over, I can't have them over again".

    Like Lucky said, she probably won't get it back but at least she's let her "friend" know she's not welcome back.

    i like all these ideas
  • ktieman
    ktieman Posts: 45 Member
    Good answer
  • stablesong
    stablesong Posts: 224
    Call the girl's mom. This happened to my brother a few years ago (college-aged) and we had to get a mutual friend's parent to talk to him. She told him we were threatening to call the cops and he drove home from his college and hour away that night to return it.

    Also you have to be 18 (19 here) to pawn anything so I highly doubt the kid pawned it.
  • coe28
    coe28 Posts: 715 Member
    Buy your daughter a new Ipod and quit inviting the girl over. She'll never confess to stealing it.
  • Babymomakell
    Babymomakell Posts: 257 Member
    You act like a parent.... and you call the other childs parent to see if she accidentally took it home with her and ask the other parent if she would look thru the girls things for the Ipod, explain why your daughter is upset that she cant find it, never accuse the other girl of stealing tho - that will automatically make the other parent on the defensive, just ask if she could look for it. plain and simple.
  • Victoria2448
    Victoria2448 Posts: 559 Member
    Call her friends mom and say your daughter thinks she may have left her iPod there.. could she take a look for you.

    This....or call her mom and say that you think it may have gotten mixed in with her daughters things when she spent the night, and see if she can search around for it.

    YUP!
  • Trail_Addict
    Trail_Addict Posts: 1,340 Member
    I know a guy.... and he won't leave any marks on her friend. :wink:
  • lizzybethclaire
    lizzybethclaire Posts: 849 Member
    Call her friends mom and say your daughter thinks she may have left her iPod there.. could she take a look for you.

    This is an excellent idea! However, best idea is to go there in person and say that your daughter left her ipod (describe it) near her kid's stuff and she thinks her friend might have gotten mixed in her stuff when she was leaving. You want to make sure the mom is home and you don't want the kid to have time to hide it.
  • galegetsthin
    galegetsthin Posts: 1,340 Member
    Lock her in a basement and blast Bieber on repeat until she cracks.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    Combination: Call the friend's mom and ask her to check saying that you think the girls things may have gotten mixed up while she was at your house, that your daughter is missing her ipod could the mother check and make sure that her daughter isn't missing anything.

    Mean while, have your daughter ask her friend if her ipod got mixed up with her friends stuff while she was visiting because she's missing it and that you're furious that it's gone and if she can't find it isn't allowed to have friends over any more.

    Then have a discussing with your daughter about the pros and cons of this relationship.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    Lock her in a basement and blast Bieber on repeat until she cracks.

    Works better than water boarding if the person has taste . . . unfortunately most teenage girls are severly lacking in taste.
  • honeysprinkles
    honeysprinkles Posts: 1,757 Member
    I would just call her mom and say that your daughter can't find her ipod, and you were wondering if maybe she could have accidentally taken it home with her. That way you don't have to accuse anyone of anything and the friend won't feel any pressure of negative consequences of returning it that would otherwise keep her from giving it back.
  • JPod279
    JPod279 Posts: 722 Member
    Lock her in a basement and blast Bieber on repeat until she cracks.

    Now that is way to cruel. (And I'm the one who suggested waterboarding.) :bigsmile:
  • BigenFluffy
    BigenFluffy Posts: 56 Member
    Besides the ipod problem, you have the problem of a thief in your house. If she'll steal from her friend, I wouldn't put it past her to take other things...even from your room.

    Even after this problem has blown over-do you really want her in your house? You can't control who your kids are friends with (believe me, it won't work) but you can control who you let into your sanctuary.
  • reshapemariah21
    reshapemariah21 Posts: 184 Member
    Same thing happened to me when I was 14.. Except I was at her house and someone (I know it was her punk *kitten* brother) stole it out of my backpack and they all acted like they didn't know what I was talking about. I wasn't allowed back over there.. and If I did go I wouldn't bring anything of value with me.
  • bikermike5094
    bikermike5094 Posts: 1,752 Member
    if its an ipod touch, did you install the find my ipod app? I use it to track my teens whereabouts on my iphone gps... and they dont even know it. Beings they always have their ipods with them, i can always find them and their ipods..
  • jcstanton
    jcstanton Posts: 1,849 Member
    I would have your daughter say to her friend something like this, "Hey, did you happen to see my iPod when you were here? I know it was here, but now I can't find it". I wouldn't start out by accusing her. If her friend says she has no idea (which is likely), I'd have your daughter say, "Well, that sucks because my mom says if my things disappear when friends come over, I can't have them over again".

    Like Lucky said, she probably won't get it back but at least she's let her "friend" know she's not welcome back.

    ^^^This. You're not directly accusing her, but the message is clear. "You took it. I know you took it. You've stolen from me in the past, but I forgave you because your friendship was important to me. However, if you're going to keep stealing from me you're no friend at all."
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