harassment in the workplace? please help?

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245

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  • BeautyFromPain
    BeautyFromPain Posts: 4,952 Member
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    Guys like this are bullies in their own way and rely on people NOT to report them or to fight back. So as others are saying, document everything, get it on audio or video if possible. Also, maybe get together with your co-workers and come up with a unified way to deal with him. For example, if he says something crude or rude, you need to say, I don't like what you just said to me and I want you to stop. It's unacceptable behavior. Or, if he touches you, yell, "STOP, don't touch me! Keep your hands to yourself! That's wrong!"

    He relies on silence to continue to do what he's doing. I would still report him, but I would also make it clear his behavior is WRONG. If no one says anything, he's going to say "Oh, everyone knew I was just joking."

    Easier said than done, I know. I once had a Chief Financial Officer of a billion dollar company, ask if I would sit on his lap. About 4 or 5 other people were in the room. I said, you have a lot of nerve right down the hall from so and so's office (head of HR). He replied, "Oh, she can sit on my lap, too. "

    I did nothing and still regret it. I should have gone immediately down the hall to report it, and then gotten a lawyer.

    I have told him multiple times to either stop or I am going to report it to the owners, he has now hidden the managers number book so I cannot find the owners number. Will send a letter to HO (head office) most definitely. Thankyou everyone.
  • jjscholar
    jjscholar Posts: 413 Member
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    First of all, no one should ever have to put up with any sort of harassment... While I am not a lawyer, I know that what your manager has been doing is wrong...

    The only recommendations that I know of are: (1) to report the harasser to your company's human resources department; and/or (2) consult with a labor relations attorney... These recommendations are applicable for those who live in the United States... In the United States the type of harassment you are describing would be a violation of your civil rights...

    I do not know what are the anti harassment laws where your place of work is...

    Sometimes, it is necessary to take aggressive legal action against those who engage in illegal harassment...
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
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    Go to higher management anyway. Don't take that awful abuse from him anymore. Document (try to record some of the harassment if possible) and talk to other witnesses to see if they'll back you up when you go to upper management. Is your work unionized? If so, you can go to the union and they will fight for you.
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
    LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo Posts: 3,634 Member
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    set your phone on video and record his nasty *kitten*. than take that to corp! THEY have to do something at that point. if they do not than you send it to a local TV station and tell them what is going on

    Make sure you know what the laws are. In some places it is illegal to record someone without their knowledge and consent.

    But it is equally illegal to sexually harass someone.
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
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    I have told him multiple times to either stop or I am going to report it to the owners, he has now hidden the managers number book so I cannot find the owners number. Will send a letter to HO (head office) most definitely. Thankyou everyone.

    Good that you're standing up for yourself. I hope everything goes smoothly and they fire that creep. I'm so sorry you had to go through such horrible harassment. :(
  • april_beth
    april_beth Posts: 617 Member
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    document, record, go to the highest up you can go. if you get terminated, sue for wrongful termination. in the meantime, for the love of christ, look for another job.
  • Jules2Be
    Jules2Be Posts: 2,267 Member
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    Document document and document everything!!!

    This, and you need a witness too it. Time, place, emails etc, keep it all, then go to HR. Shocking way for a manager to behave. What age is IT, 15?

    yep...this manager is a pieceof*****kitten* that needs to be out of there...you have the right to a safe work environment. There is definitely strength in numbers. Make sure you do get anyone else who has experienced this to document.
  • Francesca3162
    Francesca3162 Posts: 520 Member
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    Go to his boss, report what you are observing first hand, DO NOT SAY so and so told you.. Do not get all dramatci about it, just report the facts. They have to investigate your claim.. if there are others who have witnessed or been victims of his harassment, have them file thier own complaints as well.

    If after filing your complaints, HR or Management does nothing and the harassment continues, speak to them again or write a professional letter outlining all you actions in reporting this, and what has or has not been done to this end.

    If they still do nothing- contact a lawyer.....
  • Kristan_Forsey
    Kristan_Forsey Posts: 103 Member
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    You should secretly record him. Video or sound, both if possible. What an utter creep!
  • Paxtonite
    Paxtonite Posts: 22
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    do not go to the persons superior - they gave him the job. if you have an HR department, go to them first.

    and yes, try and document everything. if your phone has a voice-recording or video function, use it discreetly.
  • BeautyFromPain
    BeautyFromPain Posts: 4,952 Member
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    set your phone on video and record his nasty *kitten*. than take that to corp! THEY have to do something at that point. if they do not than you send it to a local TV station and tell them what is going on

    Make sure you know what the laws are. In some places it is illegal to record someone without their knowledge and consent.

    But it is equally illegal to sexually harass someone.

    I know that it is illegal, but I also know they have about 5 or 6 cameras recording throughout the store at all times. You cannot hear anything but we could probably look and see him sexually harassing them, whether it be him talking to them or touching them.
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,627 Member
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    go to HR. try to gt the other girls to go with you.

    all of you need to document EVERYTHING (time, date, what was said) id even record it.... you couldnt use it in a court of law most likely, but you CAN take it to HR

    (i used to work in HR!!! they WILL (if its a decent company) do something. and if not - take it to the attorney generals office)
  • leilaphoenix
    leilaphoenix Posts: 839 Member
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    Bring it up with senior management. If no action is taken within 1 month I'd get a new job. Might sound like running away but do you really want to work for a company that doesn't take this kind of thing seriously?
  • Fit4Evolution
    Fit4Evolution Posts: 375 Member
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    its sexual harrassment, go to HR and if they dont have an HR person then say you rwill speak to your lawyer.. I bet he zips his trap shut after that
  • mjterp
    mjterp Posts: 655 Member
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    It has already been said, but I'll reinforce it...
    Document
    REPORT TO HR
    There are laws against his behavior...you don't deserve to be treated this way and neither does anyone else
    There are laws against punishment for reporting (Whistle blower)
    ALL of this should be posted somewhere in your work place with information on where to go to report it.

    Encourage the others that complain to do the same! Corporate needs to know before he gets into the store manager role!
  • sel254
    sel254 Posts: 273 Member
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    Have you got a recorder on your phone? That's one way of getting proper proof.

    But if he does it to everyone, surely his superiors should believe a group of people over his say so?

    He's only threatening to fire you to scare you out of reporting him!
  • LifeChangingExp
    LifeChangingExp Posts: 459
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    Document document and document everything!!!

    This, and you need a witness too it. Time, place, emails etc, keep it all, then go to HR. Shocking way for a manager to behave. What age is IT, 15?


    ^this and set that mofo up!
  • Di3012
    Di3012 Posts: 2,250 Member
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    Guys like this are bullies in their own way and rely on people NOT to report them or to fight back. So as others are saying, document everything, get it on audio or video if possible. Also, maybe get together with your co-workers and come up with a unified way to deal with him. For example, if he says something crude or rude, you need to say, I don't like what you just said to me and I want you to stop. It's unacceptable behavior. Or, if he touches you, yell, "STOP, don't touch me! Keep your hands to yourself! That's wrong!"

    He relies on silence to continue to do what he's doing. I would still report him, but I would also make it clear his behavior is WRONG. If no one says anything, he's going to say "Oh, everyone knew I was just joking."

    Easier said than done, I know. I once had a Chief Financial Officer of a billion dollar company, ask if I would sit on his lap. About 4 or 5 other people were in the room. I said, you have a lot of nerve right down the hall from so and so's office (head of HR). He replied, "Oh, she can sit on my lap, too. "

    I did nothing and still regret it. I should have gone immediately down the hall to report it, and then gotten a lawyer.

    I have told him multiple times to either stop or I am going to report it to the owners, he has now hidden the managers number book so I cannot find the owners number. Will send a letter to HO (head office) most definitely. Thankyou everyone.

    :noway: He has hidden the owner's number???

    Report him for that too.
  • MysticMaiden22
    MysticMaiden22 Posts: 325 Member
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    document everything and report it to higher management. you cannot be simply fired for a complaint like this and there are laws that will protect you.
  • Alysgrma
    Alysgrma Posts: 365 Member
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    Been there done that!
    1.First off you have to have witnesses in telling him to stop you don't like it, if you dont tell him to stop he can say you liked hearing about it, even though it is still illegal to talk about things like that while at work.
    2. document everything he does and say and having other witnesses around when he does it would be best
    3. if he doesnt stop go to HR with all the evidence, you have to have proof, date, time and who was around and what was said
    4 If he doesnt stop or fires you...he can fire you for other reasons but we know what the real reason is...contact a lawyer

    Hope all goes well for you

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