Why Hide Your Profile / Diary?!

2

Replies

  • TheirEllie82
    TheirEllie82 Posts: 162 Member

    Hmm yeah makes sense, I'm wondering if that is the same reason for all though. Wouldn't mind hearing other points of view from those who hide their diary due to other reasons. Thanks.

    I just recently turned my public after having my ex on this site and he would e-mail me throughout the day at work about my food choices and how I needed to watch what I was eating because he had some work function or another that I was supposed to attend with him.
  • mashanda
    mashanda Posts: 120 Member
    I know some people dont just look for Ideas the critize what people eat. I have no problme telling people what i eat, but I decided to close my diary this time.
  • NiSan12
    NiSan12 Posts: 374 Member
    Most don't "hide" their diaries. The default when you join is Private. You have to intentionally open it. Most people don't know that it is something that need to do.

    This is probably the reason in most cases when people are asking for help. I've had people tell me their diaries were open, yet they really weren't. They could see it, and they knew their friends could see it, so they assumed everyone could see it.

    And a reason many people keep them closed, or have returned them to being closed is because when they open them to ask for help, quite often the people commenting seem to be harshly criticizing their poorer food choices (rather than gently advising them), making snide remarks, or trying to convince them of extreme food and exercise changes that scare them away.
    This is why I had to close mine. Too many suggestions.
  • MeliciousGibson
    MeliciousGibson Posts: 248 Member


    And a reason many people keep them closed, or have returned them to being closed is because when they open them to ask for help, quite often the people commenting seem to be harshly criticizing their poorer food choices (rather than gently advising them), making snide remarks, or trying to convince them of extreme food and exercise changes that scare them away.

    VERY MUCH ^^^^THIS!!!!

    Being tactful is an artform that MANY people on this site seem to be lacking in. You can advise someone without being rude. You can make suggestions without putting someone down.

    I'd rather just NOT deal with the snarkiness of people, so I don't bother. Unless, of course, I post something in the forum. That's when I don't mind dealing with it. It amuses me sometimes.
  • _Tara_R
    _Tara_R Posts: 688 Member
    Mine is set to private. I don't want to be bashed if I ate a piece of cake or treat of some kind.
  • chazsucks
    chazsucks Posts: 170
    I have no problem with people keeping them private, however I think it's strange when someone starts a forum topic asking for help yet has a private diary. Typically the first few comments will encourage them to open it, yet they still don't.

    I think we're still allowed to ask for help if our diaries are private. If I'm asking about something NOT to do with the food in my diary, why do I need to make it public to ask for help?
  • love4ransom
    love4ransom Posts: 67 Member
    I don't share b/c if I go over one day I don't want people judging me.
  • FrugalMomsRock75
    FrugalMomsRock75 Posts: 698 Member
    To the referenced blog... if I hide mine from my friends, I tend to go wild and get the feeling, "who cares? Nobody knows it but me..." If I keep it so my friends can see, I feel some sense of accountability. God knows if I'm only be accountable to myself, I usually fail. O.o
  • jmcdaniel0
    jmcdaniel0 Posts: 130 Member
    Sorta off topic here... but is mine open... I dont remember what i chose when i set it up, and I only have on friend... lol which is my wife. So yea. No hiding from her, no matter what i do.
  • Di3012
    Di3012 Posts: 2,247 Member
    Why do so many people hide their profile and food diary?

    When I see things like "I lose 1-2 lbs a week and I'm eating this many colories, etc".. then I click on their page and nope, can't see what their stats are to compare myself.. or to see what they're eating to get ideas of how healthy they are eating to also compare...

    :sad:

    I get more frustrated when I read threads such as "I can't lose any weight been on this diet for 8 years..... what should I do" - I go to their diary to find it is private.

    Ummm yes, I have always been a mindreader, not.
  • Captain_Tightpants
    Captain_Tightpants Posts: 2,215 Member
    I vary between open and closed. Right now I'm closed and that's because I was starting to feel a pressure to "perform" for my mfp buddies in my diary. Closing it temporarily is an experiment in self-sufficiency and to see if it helps me log better even on my bad days. When I feel comfortable I'll open it up again. I'm sure I'll go through similar peaks and troughs during my whole getting fit experience.
  • kaetmarie
    kaetmarie Posts: 668 Member
    "You drink too much wine, have fun being fat forever"

    Random PM from someone who saw me on a forum...that was nice :flowerforyou:
  • herstrawberri
    herstrawberri Posts: 347 Member
    I keep mine private because people are very judgemental on this site. I don't think it's anyones biz what i eat. i eat what works well for ME. That being said, I don't judge ANYONE on what they eat or comment on food diarys or exercise. My journey is MINE. I'm the only one that can make myself healthy and happy. I hold myself accountable for what I eat and don't need someone else making me feel like crap over something THEY don't agree with.
  • FrugalMomsRock75
    FrugalMomsRock75 Posts: 698 Member
    And for what it's worth, I DO eat cake, ice cream, cookies, and lots and lots and lots of full fat, sugar added peanut butter. My friends all know that. They see it. I talk about it.

    This journey is not about deprivation (never having anything "good" again); it's about moderation (eating those "good" things in normal quantity-a new concept for me...)
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    Because I am of legal age to make my own decisions.
  • KyliAnnHobson
    KyliAnnHobson Posts: 551 Member
    My diary is open to the public for just this reason. I think it's very helpful to get ideas from the diaries of others, but I also can't befriend every person on MFP who needs help! I like to interact with my friends and comment on their progress daily so I try to keep my friends list manageable. Anyway, my diary is open and I've lost 70 lbs, so feel free to check it out, although I'm not too exciting of an eater. lol :smile:
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    I've thought about turning mine off until I eat strict for competition prep, because that is a reason I get as to why people send me FR's - they want to see what I eat. What I currently eat is nothing special, in my opinion...
  • devonette
    devonette Posts: 263 Member
    Sorta off topic here... but is mine open... I dont remember what i chose when i set it up, and I only have on friend... lol which is my wife. So yea. No hiding from her, no matter what i do.

    jcmcdaniel, your diary is closed, breathe easy!
  • turningstar
    turningstar Posts: 393 Member
    Mines open. Feel free to browse
  • melissa_leah
    melissa_leah Posts: 107
    Mine is private because too many people feel the need to critique how healthy i'm eating (not 100% clean or whatever even though i mostly am!)

    It's annoying when people do that especially when I didn't ask for advice. I mean I appreciate the support but I need motivation not criticism......
  • AimersBee
    AimersBee Posts: 775 Member
    Sorta off topic here... but is mine open... I dont remember what i chose when i set it up, and I only have on friend... lol which is my wife. So yea. No hiding from her, no matter what i do.

    Your diary is hidden.. just FYI
  • Onaughmae
    Onaughmae Posts: 873 Member
    I dont really mind if someone has their diary set open or not. The only thing I like about an open diary is that I sometimes I am just looking for ideas. I get bored of the same thing all the time and always look for something interesting to switch things up. I keep mine open since it sort of helps to keep me accountable to myself. If someone wants to criticize me for it then that is up to them...no big deal to me really.
  • shonora
    shonora Posts: 48 Member
    Because I'm doing this for me, no one else, it's no one business but mine
  • Sister_Someone
    Sister_Someone Posts: 567 Member
    I don't share, but I don't really ask that kind of questions either. I've learned what works for me and what doesn't through previous experience and from how something makes me feel, so I don't really see a point in showing strangers what I eat. I see MFP as my own personal log, a way for me to hold myself accountable, more than anything else.
  • EDesq
    EDesq Posts: 1,527 Member

    Wow. I knew that I was really uncomfortable with an open diary because I just thought that it was so weird to have people comment on what I was eating. But I was generally doing the same as the blogger - lying on the diary. I also am a former closet eater and found that if I keep my diary private then I am honest about what I eat and log in. But I never seen it put in the way she did. That was wonderful for me to read.

    Edited to add that I also now keep the notification of completing my diary off the news feed. I don't want people commenting "Way to go" if they see I am under calorie goal or "Tomorrow's another day" if I am not.


    Also, I gave up "Friends" for that reason..some were on CRAZY DIETS, ANOREXIC and Bragging about it or ALWAYS Starting Over (They would be kicked out of AA if they did not commit and stick to THE PLAN) or just Dis-ingenious by saying "Great Job....Way to go." SUPPORT is NOT about saying the Obvious all the time, HECK, Eating OVER Calories is BEST sometimes. It is NOT Natural to eat the SAME Calories Day-In and Day-Out, and MFP Does NOT have a Section for WEEKLY Caloric or Sodium Intake Goals. Also, so called "Friend" do and say Stupid stuff that some ACTUALLY expect People to follow. WOW
  • AimersBee
    AimersBee Posts: 775 Member
    Hmmm so from what I've read the main issue is not wanting to be criticized for what you eat, even if it's just one goody out of all the healthy stuff. Interesting..

    So far, from my time being here (only a month and a half).. I haven't had an issue with anyone criticizing my food choices, I guess in time? Until then I'll just keep the diary open..

    I appreciate all the feedback, it was great to read and hear all of your thoughts on this! :flowerforyou:
  • paulsmisses
    paulsmisses Posts: 178
    i find it helpful having my diary open because my mfp friends give me hints and tips and support when i am being good or bad!
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
    deciding to keep it private is not always the same thing as "hiding" it
  • Mine is also open to friends, one of my mfpals today asked for help and was left quite upset at what one person said, sadly not everyone is positive and helpful with thier comments, I would stick to looking at friends diaries to get meal ideas rather then opening yourself up to the abuse and nastiness that some think is acceptable!! the 1st time I looked at a post I was horrified to see how unsupportive some people can be, you can send me a friend request if you like :-))
  • charip
    charip Posts: 55 Member
    Because I'm doing this for me, no one else, it's no one business but mine

    Exactly!!!!
This discussion has been closed.