I cant do moderation

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  • basj123
    basj123 Posts: 2
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    Neither can I on some things. Like I understand what you mean about 1 piece of chocolate, I can't do that, It's an addiction for me. But maybe find some food that you like but don't crave? And weigh yourself every week, it should give you motivation. I think if you get into a routine like an hours run everyday that you'll be fine when you reach your GW to keep exercising
  • Di3012
    Di3012 Posts: 2,250 Member
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    Exercise more to compensate.

    There would not be enough exercising to compensate for the amount of calories that I, and I suspect, the OP is talking about.

    We are talking about 1000s, not 100s lol.
  • letsgetskinny88
    letsgetskinny88 Posts: 59
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    I posted this last week. You might find it comforting!

    http://happiness-project.com/happiness_project/2012/05/quiz-are-you-an-abstainer-or-a-moderator/

    "A piece of advice I often see is, “Be moderate. Don’t have ice cream every night, but if you try to deny yourself altogether, you’ll fall off the wagon. Allow yourself to have the occasional treat, it will help you stick to your plan.”

    I’ve come to believe that this is good advice for some people: the “moderators.” They do better when they try to make moderate changes, when they avoid absolutes and bright lines.

    For a long time, I kept trying this strategy of moderation–and failing. Then I read a line from Samuel Johnson, who said, when someone offered him wine: “Abstinence is as easy to me as temperance would be difficult.”

    Ah ha! Like Dr. Johnson, I’m an “abstainer.”

    I find it far easier to give something up altogether than to indulge moderately. When I admitted to myself that I was eating my favorite frozen yogurt treat very often, two and even three times a day, I gave it up cold turkey. That was far easier for me to do than to eat it twice a week. If I try to be moderate, I exhaust myself debating, “Today, tomorrow?” “Does this time ‘count’?” etc. If I never do something, it requires no self-control for me; if I do something sometimes, it requires enormous self-control.

    There’s no right way or wrong way–it’s just a matter of knowing which strategy works better for you. "

    Sounds like me...... :( I think many of us have gained weight because of our lack of 'moderation'....I have an addictive personality...when I do something...I take it to the extreme.



    chips seem to be the other verdict in this thread, thankfully its not one of the things I'm addicted to.
  • LisaBeateith2012
    LisaBeateith2012 Posts: 346 Member
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    <
    Hiya I am the one in the black t-shirt :happy: I cannot do moderation either far from it. Like yourself when I am in healthy mode I am great but when I am in a eat what you want mode I go way over board! At the moment I am on holiday with my family and friends on the Isle Of Arran,SCOTLAND. So I had the rule eat what I want but OMGosh I have taken the p*ss! :sad: All this tasty food and I have went into the eating monster.:frown: You can look at my diary from Saturday until today and you will see what I am talking about!:drinker: I feel disgusted with myself but at the same time I am still doing it! :ohwell: Just cannot do moderation I am a GREEDY MONSTER! :noway: I want to be skinny but I cannot just have one slice of cake I need to eat it all!:sad: It must be a psychological problem I have! You are not alone! :tongue:
  • letsgetskinny88
    letsgetskinny88 Posts: 59
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    Exercise more to compensate.

    There would not be enough exercising to compensate for the amount of calories that I, and I suspect, the OP is talking about.

    We are talking about 1000s, not 100s lol.

    Exactly. Some days my chocolate binges were so bad...easily over 3500...maybe even double. Its quite disgusting honestly...I don't know how I'm not obese lol.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    I think moderation is much harder than the extremes. You say you cannot regulate yourself well with high-calorie foods. Therefore, you need to avoid them as much as possible. Cake and ice cream are reserved for big holidays and occasions like birthdays of important family members. Sure, you'll occasionally eat at other times, but your default position is that these treats are not things your normally eat.

    Do you want to stay thin or not?

    BTW, it's "losing," with one "o."
  • sdag
    sdag Posts: 29
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    Exercise more to compensate.

    There would not be enough exercising to compensate for the amount of calories that I, and I suspect, the OP is talking about.

    We are talking about 1000s, not 100s lol.


    Well, there's a combination of things. I, too, cannot do moderation and I have an addictive personality, as well. I take things to the extreme. If I eat an entire bag of chocolate, or an entire pint of ice cream, I factor it in, cut back on the rest of my food intake for a few days and exercise. I don't lose, but I don't gain.
  • ickybella
    ickybella Posts: 1,438 Member
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    This is my problem, too. Still a work in progress.
  • letsgetskinny88
    letsgetskinny88 Posts: 59
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    i guess it is OK to let loose sometimes, but...how long this 'eat whatever you what' phase lasts. In my case it was approximately 4ish months...and that is all it took for serious damage to be done! I still fit my clothes from before, which is why I didn't quite realize how much weight I had put on...until i stepped on the scale.
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    Exercise more to compensate.

    There would not be enough exercising to compensate for the amount of calories that I, and I suspect, the OP is talking about.

    We are talking about 1000s, not 100s lol.

    Exactly. Some days my chocolate binges were so bad...easily over 3500...maybe even double. Its quite disgusting honestly...I don't know how I'm not obese lol.

    I agree. And besides, exercising, while extremely good for you, does not fix the underlying problem, which is the overeating of bad food. If you want to stay thin you cannot rely on exercise unless you are an athlete. And one day you will get injured, or old, or pregnant and you won't be able to exercise at the same level. You have to retrain your eating habits.
  • MissNordicLight
    MissNordicLight Posts: 140 Member
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    I don't know if I'm allowed to recommend this, but it can't hurt - but if you want to change your habits I suggest getting Paul McKenna's I Can Make You Thin (including the book and CD, I got it for less than a tenner on Amazon) - it helps break the diet/gain cycle by changing your eating habits.
    Seems to be working for me so far - I'm only using this to make sure I'm not eating too few calories whilst using his methods.
    TMC

    I have this book and I must say that if you can make this work, it would be the absolutely best way to handle weight over a lifetime. Have to dig it out again ...
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
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    i guess it is OK to let loose sometimes, but...how long this 'eat whatever you what' phase lasts. In my case it was approximately 4ish months...and that is all it took for serious damage to be done! I still fit my clothes from before, which is why I didn't quite realize how much weight I had put on...until i stepped on the scale.

    That's exactly why the talk I often read here about not weighing oneself is complete b.s. If you want to know what your weight is doing, you weigh yourself regularly. Otherwise, you're deluding yourself. (Also keep track of things like your body fat % and measurements.)
  • spaingirl2011
    spaingirl2011 Posts: 763 Member
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    This is something I'm working on because I'm trying to have a healthier relationship with food (along with getting thinner). Honestly? It's a habit and habits are hard to break. If you put me in a restaurant (almost any restaurant), I will overeat. Guaranteed. If you put me in a restaurant after 4 weeks of eating at home and I overeat, I will feel bloated, sick, have pounds of water weight and really suck at my workout the next morning. The next time, I try to eat a little less because I learned how sick I feel. I still buy M&Ms and I still eat them. Sometimes I eat them to excess and then realize that I don't have the appetite for my delicious dinner. 8 little M&Ms would have been sufficient.

    It's really about breaking down the habit. Instead of going at your chocolate bars like Armageddon is on the horizon. Eat one and take special note of how you feel as you're eating it. At what point have you had enough? At what point do you no longer like the taste, but feel compelled to eat it because it's there? Write it all down. Make an experiment of it. Eat slowly, taste the chocolate. Put yourself on a timer.

    I think you'll find that you're not actually tasting the chocolate and you don't need all that much of it. Just like exercising and portioning, this is also a habit.
  • letsgetskinny88
    letsgetskinny88 Posts: 59
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    I usually have the same pattern of weight gain:

    skinny --- > getting busy in life ---> stops working out ---- > starts eating crap ---->fat
    >x REPEAT
  • kwin91
    kwin91 Posts: 128
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    I used to have a lot of trouble with this. But I think about it this way, would I rather look good and be fit. Or be a little fatty? I would rather be fit and look damn good.

    So what I do is treat myself with something 2x a week for all my hard work.
    But that might be 1 CUP of ice cream or a quarter of a dove chocolate bar.
    I trained myself not to over indulge because the next day I feel bloated and guilty.
    I would rather have a little bit hear and there and be able to control it.
    You just have to get out of the mind set of what it sounds like is a binge.
    Just try to have a little of something and right after you have it say ok that was good, and be done. Its not the end of the world if you don't eat the whole thing, but think of how much happier you'll be the next day.
  • Peta22
    Peta22 Posts: 377 Member
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    Yep... Exactly the same! Good to know I'm not the only one :) And I'm definitely off the wagon... Today has been atrocious! I haven't logged since lunchtime because I've just kept eating to the point that I now feel absolutely revolting... This has been building over the last week but I'm hoping that I've outdone myself today and the cravings might come to an end now... However, it does make me wonder if I can ever stop the 'extremes' and actually find balance. I don't want to not be able to eat certain things ever again but once I start I can't stop! :(
  • Peta22
    Peta22 Posts: 377 Member
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    I usually have the same pattern of weight gain:

    skinny --- > getting busy in life ---> stops working out ---- > starts eating crap ---->fat
    >x REPEAT

    I so relate... :)
  • letsgetskinny88
    letsgetskinny88 Posts: 59
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    my binges are horrible.

    I do them when I am alone, because I don't want my bf or my friends or my co-workers to judge me.... I would buy like a pack of chocolate chip cookies, 5-6 bars of chocolate....all polished in 30 mins.

    Binge eating disorder to the max!
  • Peta22
    Peta22 Posts: 377 Member
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    my binges are horrible.

    I do them when I am alone, because I don't want my bf or my friends or my co-workers to judge me.... I would buy like a pack of chocolate chip cookies, 5-6 bars of chocolate....all polished in 30 mins.

    Binge eating disorder to the max!

    Same... I'm suffering the consequences of half a cheesecake, 1/2 pck of choc biscuits, sausage and spaghetti dinner, 1/2 bottle of wine and 2 chocolate bars at the moment (ate he other half of packs yesterday...) :(
  • Mrs_Sheila
    Mrs_Sheila Posts: 39
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    I very much used to be an all or nothing kind of girl. I was ON or OFF. When I was off ~ I was REALLY off. When I was on ~ I was obnoxiously ON! ~Sound familiar? Relatinships even changed depending if I was off/on It sucked. It took me two years to break that. There is such a thing as moderation ~ but it just doesn't happen. YOU have to choose it.

    I eat ice cream with my husband and kids. They have a their's in a cup ~ I have mine in a silver condiment cup.
    I eat chips with the family. I put some on theirs ~ I count out six for me.
    I eat hamburgers with them ~ I cut mine in 1/2 eat 1/2 and either throw the other half away or put it away for later.

    Why?
    1. The stomach does NOT have tastebuds! ONLY My mouth! Usually if I eat that ice cream slowly ~ I ENJOY every single tastebud that gets tickled! I am satisfied at the end.
    2. I love chips (crisps for the UK), but really if I eat six (not popping a whole one in my mouth but breaking that chip into 2 peices) and eat it slowly I enjoy the salty crunch.
    3. 1/2 a burger is enough. Logically I know that!

    YOU CAN choose to embrace moderation, or you choose to live in the hell hole of all or nothing. THERE is no in between!

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