Not looking to be judged, I just need help.
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It sounds like you know what's going wrong, that it's going to make you unhealthy.
You want to weigh less, you can cut off limbs and shave your head bald.
You don't want that.
Here are some suggestions.
You are allowed to weigh yourself once a week. That's it. That's the rule now.
Then, calculate your BMR it's what your body needs to survive. Never eat less than that. You might feel like it's a lot of food, but your perspective is compromised. Never eat less than that. Your body really, really needs it.
Next, stop worry about looking a certain way for now. Worry about feeling good, being healthy. Healthy is attractive, healthy is good. "Skinny" is what disease and drugs look like. Think healthy, think fit, think strong.
Once you do this for a while, your body will start giving you cues about when it needs what kinds nutrients - your hunger response is probably all whacked out now if you've been damaging yourself. Once your body starts giving you those cues, listen to it; if you're exercising, you've got to fuel it.
^^^ This is excellent advice. Once you start eating at or a bit above your BMR, you will feel better. Your body will be fueled properly, which will lessen or eliminate fatigue and depression. I also agree with the poster who said to tell yourself 5 things everyday that are good, and 5 things you are grateful for. These two bits of great advice are a fantastic start to getting you on the right track.0 -
From me to jump from how much I've been eating to eating over my BMR or even over the 1200 calories that MFP set me at is beyond scary, I have my diary public now ( I though it was before but I made my profile public not my diary opps) so can someone tell me how I can start increasing my calories so I don't gain
For some odd reason my diary won't show up so here's the link http://www.myfitnesspal.com/food/diary/SmallBodyBigHeart0 -
Find an activity that calms your mind, if that is running, swimming, or medication, great! If not trying a "paint by numbers" a video game, or playing a musical insturment, fine too! Just from reading your post it is clear your mind moves so fast and you need to find someway to have a little peace. The positive self image idea of 5 good things about your self and 5 things to be grateful for are a good start.
I agree with the other, throw your scale away! Make food choices and excersise choices that will help you to be HEALTHY. Do not obese about "clean" food. There are NO BAD FOODS! There are bad quantities of indulgent food, but nothing should be off limits or "unclean".
Choose do you want to be skinny or do you want to be strong? Do you want to be thin or vibrant and glowing? People dying of cancer lose massive quantites of weight but they don't look like super models. You can be the bright wonderful healthy girl you want to be and it will not be because your size "0".0 -
Find an activity that calms your mind, if that is running, swimming, or medication, great! If not trying a "paint by numbers" a video game, or playing a musical insturment, fine too! Just from reading your post it is clear your mind moves so fast and you need to find someway to have a little peace. The positive self image idea of 5 good things about your self and 5 things to be grateful for are a good start.
I agree with the other, throw your scale away! Make food choices and excersise choices that will help you to be HEALTHY. Do not obese about "clean" food. There are NO BAD FOODS! There are bad quantities of indulgent food, but nothing should be off limits or "unclean".
Choose do you want to be skinny or do you want to be strong? Do you want to be thin or vibrant and glowing? People dying of cancer lose massive quantites of weight but they don't look like super models. You can be the bright wonderful healthy girl you want to be and it will not be because your size "0".
I know I know I can fit into the size 0 but I just can't buckle it so I don't see why thats so bad. There are fit people who wear a size 0.0 -
You have come to the right place.
Just read up and follow the MFP recommendations; eat lean meats, low fat dairy, whole grains, nuts, fruits and veggies.
Simple!
Read this: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/23912-links-in-mfp-you-want-to-read-again-and-again
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/10589-for-those-confused-or-questioning-eating-your-exercise-calo
Learn all you can.
Track your diet and exercises - again simple.
You will do fine - ALL IS POSSIBLE0 -
To answer all of your question. Yes I am in school and yes my school does have a counselors, honestly I don't think I'll ever have enough courage to go and talk to her about something like this. My doctor is okay with my weight, I know when I went to her a couple months ago (I weighed more than) she told me to kind of watch what I eat because I was close to be in an unhealthy BMI range. I can almost fit into my size 0 pants they just won’t buckle. I was hesitant to post that one of my goals was to be a size zero because I know that a size zero is looked down upon and looked as unhealthy but I don’t think it is.
Darling, a size zero is not unhealthy.. esp if you are naturally there. At 5'9, and a size 4, I'm looked down upon by other women as a genetic freak who must be a walking stick. Instead I'm 151 pounds with a pretty nice *kitten* and muscle to boot.. so don't let others tell you what is healthy and what is not. Only you know what is good for you.
Secondly, You do not have to eat clean by no means.. only if you want to. As long as your calories are less then what you are taking in, then you will lose weight. Does eating healthy make you feel better and have more energy? For the most part, yes.. but if you can't do it, it's not the end all be all to weight loss.
As far as increasing calories go, start small.. like 100-200 calories a week and see how your body reacts. You may see a gain at first, but know it's water weight and not fat. When your weight levels off and you start to maintain, you know where your maintenance level is. From there you can deduct either 250 calories for half a pound a week loss or 500 calories for a pound a week loss and see how your body does.0 -
To answer all of your question. Yes I am in school and yes my school does have a counselors, honestly I don't think I'll ever have enough courage to go and talk to her about something like this. My doctor is okay with my weight, I know when I went to her a couple months ago (I weighed more than) she told me to kind of watch what I eat because I was close to be in an unhealthy BMI range. I can almost fit into my size 0 pants they just won’t buckle. I was hesitant to post that one of my goals was to be a size zero because I know that a size zero is looked down upon and looked as unhealthy but I don’t think it is.
Darling, a size zero is not unhealthy.. esp if you are naturally there. At 5'9, and a size 4, I'm looked down upon by other women as a genetic freak who must be a walking stick. Instead I'm 151 pounds with a pretty nice *kitten* and muscle to boot.. so don't let others tell you what is healthy and what is not. Only you know what is good for you.
Secondly, You do not have to eat clean by no means.. only if you want to. As long as your calories are less then what you are taking in, then you will lose weight. Does eating healthy make you feel better and have more energy? For the most part, yes.. but if you can't do it, it's not the end all be all to weight loss.
As far as increasing calories go, start small.. like 100-200 calories a week and see how your body reacts. You may see a gain at first, but know it's water weight and not fat. When your weight levels off and you start to maintain, you know where your maintenance level is. From there you can deduct either 250 calories for half a pound a week loss or 500 calories for a pound a week loss and see how your body does.
While I'm in the process of increasing my calories should I exercise lightly or not exercise at all. I don't want to burn off any food that my body needs. I like doing yoga so maybe I could just cut out the cardio and focus on yoga.0 -
To answer all of your question. Yes I am in school and yes my school does have a counselors, honestly I don't think I'll ever have enough courage to go and talk to her about something like this. My doctor is okay with my weight, I know when I went to her a couple months ago (I weighed more than) she told me to kind of watch what I eat because I was close to be in an unhealthy BMI range. I can almost fit into my size 0 pants they just won’t buckle. I was hesitant to post that one of my goals was to be a size zero because I know that a size zero is looked down upon and looked as unhealthy but I don’t think it is.
Darling, a size zero is not unhealthy.. esp if you are naturally there. At 5'9, and a size 4, I'm looked down upon by other women as a genetic freak who must be a walking stick. Instead I'm 151 pounds with a pretty nice *kitten* and muscle to boot.. so don't let others tell you what is healthy and what is not. Only you know what is good for you.
Secondly, You do not have to eat clean by no means.. only if you want to. As long as your calories are less then what you are taking in, then you will lose weight. Does eating healthy make you feel better and have more energy? For the most part, yes.. but if you can't do it, it's not the end all be all to weight loss.
As far as increasing calories go, start small.. like 100-200 calories a week and see how your body reacts. You may see a gain at first, but know it's water weight and not fat. When your weight levels off and you start to maintain, you know where your maintenance level is. From there you can deduct either 250 calories for half a pound a week loss or 500 calories for a pound a week loss and see how your body does.
While I'm in the process of increasing my calories should I exercise lightly or not exercise at all. I don't want to burn off any food that my body needs.
You can exercise to any intensity that you want.. but know that you should prob. eat at least some of the exercise calories back then if you are worried about not eating enough.
I wouldn't say that you have to cut out cardio.. you can do cardio, yoga, strength training... whatever you choose.
Just listen to your body and if it says hey, i'm hungry! then feed it. That's what it really boils down to.0 -
To answer all of your question. Yes I am in school and yes my school does have a counselors, honestly I don't think I'll ever have enough courage to go and talk to her about something like this. My doctor is okay with my weight, I know when I went to her a couple months ago (I weighed more than) she told me to kind of watch what I eat because I was close to be in an unhealthy BMI range. I can almost fit into my size 0 pants they just won’t buckle. I was hesitant to post that one of my goals was to be a size zero because I know that a size zero is looked down upon and looked as unhealthy but I don’t think it is.
Darling, a size zero is not unhealthy.. esp if you are naturally there. At 5'9, and a size 4, I'm looked down upon by other women as a genetic freak who must be a walking stick. Instead I'm 151 pounds with a pretty nice *kitten* and muscle to boot.. so don't let others tell you what is healthy and what is not. Only you know what is good for you.
Secondly, You do not have to eat clean by no means.. only if you want to. As long as your calories are less then what you are taking in, then you will lose weight. Does eating healthy make you feel better and have more energy? For the most part, yes.. but if you can't do it, it's not the end all be all to weight loss.
As far as increasing calories go, start small.. like 100-200 calories a week and see how your body reacts. You may see a gain at first, but know it's water weight and not fat. When your weight levels off and you start to maintain, you know where your maintenance level is. From there you can deduct either 250 calories for half a pound a week loss or 500 calories for a pound a week loss and see how your body does.
While I'm in the process of increasing my calories should I exercise lightly or not exercise at all. I don't want to burn off any food that my body needs.
You can exercise to any intensity that you want.. but know that you should prob. eat at least some of the exercise calories back then if you are worried about not eating enough.
I wouldn't say that you have to cut out cardio.. you can do cardio, yoga, strength training... whatever you choose.
Just listen to your body and if it says hey, i'm hungry! then feed it. That's what it really boils down to.
I agree with PP. Just because it's a size 0 doesn't necessarily mean it's unhealthy. Everyones body is different (for example, I'm 5'11" and 148lbs and a size 6...PP is 5'9", 151lb and a size 4. Everyone has a different build). The key is to just try to listen to your body. If you're hungry, eat. If you want to work out, then work out. Whatever makes you HAPPY. Happy is the key. I'd say it's far better to be happy in a size 2 than miserable in a size 0. Sizes are like age, it's nothing but a number.0 -
Do try to "net" 1200 calories so you have your basic fuel daily.0
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I know eating 1200+ calories sounds scary-it was for me too. I had a hard time no trying to stay under 1000 calories a day. BUT once I started eating more calories I'm not going to lie I did gain a few pounds (like 3), but I was told not to despair and to keep on with it-so I did. What it seemed like was my body was hoarding the weight unless I started eating under 1000 calories again. After eating 1200+ a day for about a week I felt better. I had more energy! I was less moody. It was a break through for me.
By daily calorie intake is about 1310 per MFP and I do my best to meet it. Find some healthy food you LOVE eating. Mine is corn on the cobb- I don't know what I am going to do when it gets out os season again. I also found out I LOVE greek yogurt0Chobani's fruit on the bottom is wonderful.
When you eat more your body isn't afraid to lose the weight-it is happy again.
While I may never fit into a size 0, if that is a reasonable goal for you then go for it. I agree people freak out when they see you mention wanting to fit a 0, but if it just won't buckle then you need to make those small changes your body is craving.
Also, drink TONS of water. When I would hear people talk about Water Weight I always thought it was weight from the water they drank-don't laugh, I know it sounds silly, but it was never explained to me. One week I was sick with a stomach bug and drank water like it was going out of style and did my best to keep my calories up-in that week alone I lost 3 pounds. Who knew!
If you want to talk, feel free to friend request or message me. I wish you the best of luck!0 -
Whether or not a size zero is healthy is totally up to your body frame, and none of us are in a position to judge that. What is very obviously NOT healthy is your self-image. Don't worry, though! It's totally fixable.
Breathe. I got tense and stressed just reading your posts. Do you find that your muscles are clenched or tense when they don't need to be? In addition to being downright unhealthy, stress boosts cortisol, which makes you retain fat. So there's triple motivation to relax -- emotional health, physical health, and fat loss. Easier said than done, I know, but there are a couple really easy steps you can take.
First, it sounds like you care more about the jeans than the scale anyway, yet it's the scale you're using to beat yourself over the head. So toss it altogether, or bury it in the dark recesses of a closet or hard-to-reach cabinet and only pull it out once a week, on a pre-designated morning, to check your weekly update. That's it -- no more. It's just adding stress to your life.
Second, deep breathing is totally easy and totally free. Try 5 minutes a day -- even if it's just in bed right before you go to sleep. Breathe in through your diaphragm -- it's your belly that should rise and fall, not your chest. 5 seconds in, pause for a second, 5 seconds out. If plus or minus a couple seconds feels better, that's cool too.
Try yoga. Don't approach it as a workout or a weight-loss mechanism -- it doesn't matter if your heart rate goes up, or if you master the pose. What matters is stretching your body, really paying attention to how it's feeling and what it's doing, and learning how to relax all those muscles. I have never been so relaxed as when I learned to let go in yoga and really FEEL my body. If it makes you cry, that's okay.
I'd talk to your doc about your calorie intake. It seems really low to me. You'd mentioned not knowing how to boost it; a handful of healthy, nutrient-rich nuts a couple times a day would do it. Nuts are powerhouses (and so tasty)!
What is it that concerns you about seeing a therapist? Now's the best possible time to do it -- odds are, you're covered by your school insurance, and right now is when you are establishing the patterns for the rest of your life. Therapists are there to help, and they've got some pretty great tools. If you broke your leg, you'd go see a medical doctor, right? Well, an emotional injury is just as real, and they have the training to help you heal it. Go back and read the post you wrote, but pretend it's your best friend or sister telling you that was how THEY felt about themselves. Would you let them talk that way about themselves? Or would you help them get help? If you can approach an Internet site full of strangers for help, you can go see your school's therapist. You can do this. You are so much better and stronger than you're giving yourself credit for.0 -
Oh, and one more note about clean eating -- don't be a perfectionist about it, and you'll see it can be a lot cheaper and easier than you think. Like another poster said, eggs & beans are really easy, cheap and healthy. Personally, I love soup. You can make a huge pot of fabulous soup that is chock-full of veggies & beans for super cheap, and eat it for a week!
(and if you'd like some help with recipes, I can share!)0 -
Whether or not a size zero is healthy is totally up to your body frame, and none of us are in a position to judge that. What is very obviously NOT healthy is your self-image. Don't worry, though! It's totally fixable.
Breathe. I got tense and stressed just reading your posts. Do you find that your muscles are clenched or tense when they don't need to be? In addition to being downright unhealthy, stress boosts cortisol, which makes you retain fat. So there's triple motivation to relax -- emotional health, physical health, and fat loss. Easier said than done, I know, but there are a couple really easy steps you can take.
First, it sounds like you care more about the jeans than the scale anyway, yet it's the scale you're using to beat yourself over the head. So toss it altogether, or bury it in the dark recesses of a closet or hard-to-reach cabinet and only pull it out once a week, on a pre-designated morning, to check your weekly update. That's it -- no more. It's just adding stress to your life.
Second, deep breathing is totally easy and totally free. Try 5 minutes a day -- even if it's just in bed right before you go to sleep. Breathe in through your diaphragm -- it's your belly that should rise and fall, not your chest. 5 seconds in, pause for a second, 5 seconds out. If plus or minus a couple seconds feels better, that's cool too.
Try yoga. Don't approach it as a workout or a weight-loss mechanism -- it doesn't matter if your heart rate goes up, or if you master the pose. What matters is stretching your body, really paying attention to how it's feeling and what it's doing, and learning how to relax all those muscles. I have never been so relaxed as when I learned to let go in yoga and really FEEL my body. If it makes you cry, that's okay.
I'd talk to your doc about your calorie intake. It seems really low to me. You'd mentioned not knowing how to boost it; a handful of healthy, nutrient-rich nuts a couple times a day would do it. Nuts are powerhouses (and so tasty)!
What is it that concerns you about seeing a therapist? Now's the best possible time to do it -- odds are, you're covered by your school insurance, and right now is when you are establishing the patterns for the rest of your life. Therapists are there to help, and they've got some pretty great tools. If you broke your leg, you'd go see a medical doctor, right? Well, an emotional injury is just as real, and they have the training to help you heal it. Go back and read the post you wrote, but pretend it's your best friend or sister telling you that was how THEY felt about themselves. Would you let them talk that way about themselves? Or would you help them get help? If you can approach an Internet site full of strangers for help, you can go see your school's therapist. You can do this. You are so much better and stronger than you're giving yourself credit for.
I know it's the scale that causes me to feel this way but I just can't seem to let it go. I feel like I'm married to the scale, some days it makes me happy, some days it makes me sad, we fight to the point I take the batteries out but I love that scale so much I have to put the batteries back in. (excuses me weirdness) I'm putting the scale in the garage, trust me I'm too lazy and too scared to go in that garage to get it after I put it in there. I'm just afraid that when I do get rid of the scale I'm going to get addicted to something else that's not going to help me. & I love doing yoga, I just started doing it and I'm in love, I do have a problem with concentrating will doing it though but I hope I get better at it.0 -
To answer all of your question. Yes I am in school and yes my school does have a counselors, honestly I don't think I'll ever have enough courage to go and talk to her about something like this. My doctor is okay with my weight, I know when I went to her a couple months ago (I weighed more than) she told me to kind of watch what I eat because I was close to be in an unhealthy BMI range. I can almost fit into my size 0 pants they just won’t buckle. I was hesitant to post that one of my goals was to be a size zero because I know that a size zero is looked down upon and looked as unhealthy but I don’t think it is.
Darling, a size zero is not unhealthy.. esp if you are naturally there. At 5'9, and a size 4, I'm looked down upon by other women as a genetic freak who must be a walking stick. Instead I'm 151 pounds with a pretty nice *kitten* and muscle to boot.. so don't let others tell you what is healthy and what is not. Only you know what is good for you.
Secondly, You do not have to eat clean by no means.. only if you want to. As long as your calories are less then what you are taking in, then you will lose weight. Does eating healthy make you feel better and have more energy? For the most part, yes.. but if you can't do it, it's not the end all be all to weight loss.
As far as increasing calories go, start small.. like 100-200 calories a week and see how your body reacts. You may see a gain at first, but know it's water weight and not fat. When your weight levels off and you start to maintain, you know where your maintenance level is. From there you can deduct either 250 calories for half a pound a week loss or 500 calories for a pound a week loss and see how your body does.
While I'm in the process of increasing my calories should I exercise lightly or not exercise at all. I don't want to burn off any food that my body needs.
You can exercise to any intensity that you want.. but know that you should prob. eat at least some of the exercise calories back then if you are worried about not eating enough.
I wouldn't say that you have to cut out cardio.. you can do cardio, yoga, strength training... whatever you choose.
Just listen to your body and if it says hey, i'm hungry! then feed it. That's what it really boils down to.
Thank you, I'll try my hardest. I just have to remember that food is not the enemy. ( easier said then done)0 -
I wasn't going to judge you, but damn you wrote so much.0
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I wasn't going to judge you, but damn you wrote so much.
Because I wanted help (I see that not what you came on this forum to do) and I wanted people to understand where I was coming from. I included details you know all of that, Oh wait am I writing to much?......I'm just so sick of the arrogant people on here I seriously am. Go make jokes somewhere else!0 -
Well for starters, don't be so hard on yourself. There are so many millions of people that struggle with weight loss and all they need is that push, that motivation, to keep them on track. Unfortunately I am one of those that have struggled - I hated going shopping for clothes, I was obsessed with the scale and watching the numbers go up, I was depressed, I knew I was overweight, but I just wasn't ready to make the changes.
In January of this year, I was looking at pictures of Christmas, and came across a really awful picture of me...and as I kept looking through the pictures, I realized it wasn't just one picture, it was all the pictures...I was disgusting myself looking at them all, but I'm glad I did, because it gave me the motivation I needed to begin changing myself - but I wasn't sure where to begin. My friend directed me to this website, My Fitness Pal, and it's really helped me a lot, I've met a lot of awesome people, and they've been a great help. Also, we have a 3 1/2 year old that's getting ready for T-Ball, and I don't want to be a sit-on-the-sideline chubby mommy! I want to be chasing him and playing with him without running out of breath, without falling over my fat self! It sounds bad, but that's just how I felt.
What got me where I am (I'm down 35lbs), is taking every milestone "5lbs at a time". I would set a 5lb goal for myself and see if I could do it. Once I got there, I'd set another 5lb goal, and so on and so on. I've found the Insanity workout now and have been doing that for 4 weeks and have really built up some awesome muscle, so although my scale isn't moving, I'm down 8.5 inches since I began 4 weeks ago. You have to remember, the scale is not always the best way to gauge your progress too. When I plateau'd by doing Insanity, I got really upset, but once I began my measurements and all my clothes were noticably baggy, I realized I was making some great progress.
You need to start at square one: Change your eating and set a goal. Set a 5lb goal for your self and start with small changes. Change out your potato chips for banana chips. Change out your soda for diet soda (later you should avoid soda completely but to begin just start with small changes), begin incorporating water into your diet, just start small. If you think "Oh I have to lose 80lbs and I have to do x,y,z to get there" you'll never make it....I know because that's why I always used to fail. This is the first time I've put my mind to losing weight and getting healthy since I was first married - when I got married 16 years ago, I was 102lbs and my wedding dress was a size 2 - now all these years later I found myself comfortable at 183lbs and a size 16??? No way!!! That's ridiculous!! I just made a few small changes to start, I didn't decide to plow into a "diet" because a "diet" means a temporary thing, and I have made a lifestyle change. Do I cheat every once in awhile? Absolutely!! BUT...as with everything...moderation is the key. I eat healthy 99% of the time now, and for the first time in 6 months, this past weekend we went to my favorite mexican food restaurant to celebrate my 35lb mark. It was great, but I could feel the crappiness setting in after I ate - especially considering how good I eat now - you'll really be able to feel the difference.
Wishing you all the best of luck!!!!0 -
Hey There!
The main thing I have done is cut out processed foods. I hardly ever eat chips, drink coke, eat fast food, or mostly anything from the store that you can't prepare yourself.
Now for snacks, I eat almonds, I have had beef jerky which I need to start steering away from but I like the protein, a peanut butter sandwich. Right now I'm doing weight training to lose weight and gain muscle so I do use a couple protein shakes. I eat a lot of grilled chicken and veggies.
From January to March, I cut out chips, coke, fast food and I lost 30 lbs without working out, mind you I was quite overweight. In april, I started exercising, first with the Insanity program and now p90x and I have lost SOO many inches off my chest/stomach/waist/hips plus I've lost 12 more pounds through that.
Strength training is GREAT for losing inches off your body. The thing is, you need to fuel your body with good nutritious foods in order to help. You don't have to be a bodybuilder to lift weights. A lot of women strength train and get great results without looking like a man. They look like a fit woman!
I eat about every 2 to 3 hours whether it's a pbj sandwich, a shake, or an apple and if I don't, my stomach starts yelling FEED ME because it needs energy.
Listen to your body, not your scale. If you get obsessed with the scale then you can't properly maintain good nutrition because of your mental attitude. I don't think this is something that a school counselor needs to hear unless the problems go deeper then that but just need the mindset to say, I'm tired of where I am and I'm going to do something about it. You'll feel so much better accomplishing something that you set your mind to.0 -
I have battled some ED issues in my lifetime. I refuse to own a scale for this reason. I only weigh in at the gym and only the once particular branch of the gym...I use my clothing to make sure I am on track. If my clothes get too tight I need to make changes.
Also I reiterate the message about saying positive affirmations to yourself each day. Start with one or two each morning. I think finding a few that are fall backs for days you are feeling self critical...ie you feel bloated but notice you have kick *kitten* eyes....it helps....
I have recently gone through an effort to have a healthier attitude toward my food. I am tired of feeling like I need to earn my right to eat. I added 75-100 cals to my target calories every two weeks until I got to my maintenance calories. After a few months I changed my perspective again and went for more of a TDEE approach. I have to admit it has been healthier for me.
Fill your house with great foods, nuts, beans, quinoa (lasts forever etc), eggs, veggies, frozen veggies are cheap and work well...and fruit ..yummmm0
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