What is wrong? (long)

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tantalee
tantalee Posts: 130 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
So ive been around MFP for quite a while.
I was losing, slowly, some weight but never reach what i wanted.
The last months were not as good as i expected...moving apartment, baby had 2 pneumonias, med school final exams...but the stress was nothing that im not used to dealing with. But i still manage to gain around 6 kg in a short period of time.
Then my husband starts to tell me that im depressed, but i dont feel depressed. So i started to see what was i doing. I dont have energy or will to do any thing. Even getting out of the bed is hard (this is because my bed is crap and my back hurt). I hate the new apartment and i dont like the "now" time...dont know why. So my days are passed doing basically nothing, just existing and even my baby doesnt make me happy.
At the end of the day, after my baby is in his bed, i eat and eat and eat. Normally stupid things, like fries and kinders.
Because i had, for half of dozen of years, a pretty severe anorexia (my lowest was bellow 40 kg) im familiar with eating disorders. And im thinking if i didnt become an over eater.
Any ideas? Any help?
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  • tantalee
    tantalee Posts: 130 Member
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  • MalSponseller
    MalSponseller Posts: 217 Member
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    I would say, tantalee, that some of the things you mentioned do sound like symptoms of depression. I'd suggest sitting down with a psychologist or counselor a few times to determine if this is a state of depression, or simply something else. Either way, the psychologist can help you through it.
  • tantalee
    tantalee Posts: 130 Member
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    I really dont feel depressed...well,i dont feel like crying or that the world is about to end.
    I think that the problem is that is every thing at the same time plus dealing with my son's terminal illness.Who wouldnt be sad and eatingand without the will to do things?
    I really am lost.Im trying to find support groups on the internet but i found nothing regardind overeating.
  • aimeeinohio
    aimeeinohio Posts: 301 Member
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    Depression can sneak up on us..and it's not always the crying thing. Stress, life changes, etc, can cause us to be 'off'. I agree that you should talk to a counselor or someone. You might benefit from both the talking it out and a little medication for a short period.

    I tell you this from experience- I had very sever depression that snuck up on me. Like you, I didn't feel like crying all the time, or that the world was crashing down, but I did know I wasn't quite.... 'right'. I ended up having a total nervous breakdown-ling term medication, shrinks, the whole thing. Please check into it before you reach the point I did. It wasn't pretty.

    xoxo
    Aimee
  • katrinkap
    katrinkap Posts: 443 Member
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    i agree! I see a therapist every two weeks, even if I am going through a "good time" it's nice to bounce ideas off of someone who is objective.

    Also, if you are prescribed medication, give it a chance. You may also have to put your exercise on the back burner until that is figured out, but once you do, get moving again. Medication doesn't mean you are a freak, it means the chemical balance in your brain is not right and you need meds to help keep yourself and others safe and content. When I was first on put on medication, I told my doctor, "You need to help me. Either that or I will kill my husband, lock myself in a basement and my kids will be in foster care." It worked. :)
  • karip0303
    karip0303 Posts: 5 Member
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    Depression is not defined as a feeling of sadness but a lack of happiness. There are some things you can to to naturally help such as have a healthy diet, exercise and try to keep yourself busy. If these things do not help I would go see a Dr for extra help.
  • cpettigrew
    cpettigrew Posts: 168 Member
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    I really dont feel depressed...well,i dont feel like crying or that the world is about to end.
    I think that the problem is that is every thing at the same time plus dealing with my son's terminal illness.Who wouldnt be sad and eatingand without the will to do things?
    I really am lost.Im trying to find support groups on the internet but i found nothing regardind overeating.

    Depression doesn't always come with crying or feeling like the world is going to end. I have dealt with depression, among other things, all of my life. I do feel like I don't want to do anything, and lose interest in everything I enjoy. I also get angry with everyone and everything, instead of crying. I treat people, even friends, like they are the cause of my problems and unwanted feelings/emotions. Seeing a therapist might be a good idea. I am currently seeing one now, and along with medication, has been the best thing I could have done.
  • tantalee
    tantalee Posts: 130 Member
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    I hate psychiatrists or any thing close to them.Ok...happy pill seem nice but im not insane or...i dont know what.
    I just eat and eat.And im huge!!!i know i need to make a diet,to get healthy but it just seems too much.That is why i think im having an over eating problem,trying to compensate the pain of going to lose my child to a stupid disease with food.
    If i "know"what is happening that is also considered depression?
    Also im ashamed for all this.Im a med student and med stundents dont need shrinks
  • cpettigrew
    cpettigrew Posts: 168 Member
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    Knowing is a start, but it doesn't fix anything. I have known most of my life. I tried to fix it on my own. I also tried to commit suicide more than once as a result of "knowing" and "handling" everything on my own.
  • tantalee
    tantalee Posts: 130 Member
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    Of course i know that med students also get depression.i was just beeing sarcastic.
    But this is a small town and if my teachers find out it will be very embarassing
  • suziecue66
    suziecue66 Posts: 1,312 Member
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    I hate psychiatrists or any thing close to them.Ok...happy pill seem nice but im not insane or...i dont know what.
    I just eat and eat.And im huge!!!i know i need to make a diet,to get healthy but it just seems too much.That is why i think im having an over eating problem,trying to compensate the pain of going to lose my child to a stupid disease with food.
    If i "know"what is happening that is also considered depression?
    Also im ashamed for all this.Im a med student and med stundents dont need shrinks

    Every body needs someone to talk to about their feelings. You are facing the eventual loss of your child from a terminal illness and may benefit from seeing someone. At the moment you are dealing with your emotions by turning to food. Try and find another outlet. I'm sorry about your boy.
  • cpettigrew
    cpettigrew Posts: 168 Member
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    No one needs to know. Until now, only my brother, father, and best friend know that I am now medicated. My mother raised me and both my brothers to believe that medication and therapist were some sort of government thought control organization (not joking), so it was VERY hard for me to see a therapist the first time, and I told her straight out I didn't necessarily believe that it would do any good.
  • anacsitham5
    anacsitham5 Posts: 814 Member
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    I really dont feel depressed...well,i dont feel like crying or that the world is about to end.
    I think that the problem is that is every thing at the same time plus dealing with my son's terminal illness.Who wouldnt be sad and eatingand without the will to do things?
    I really am lost.Im trying to find support groups on the internet but i found nothing regardind overeating.

    Depressed doesn't have to mean sad and crying. It can mean that you have no zest for life. It sounds as if you had the choice, you wouldn't get out of bed in the morning. That is a sign of depression. It's not wrong to seek out a professional for assistance. Good luck!
  • tantalee
    tantalee Posts: 130 Member
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    Im sorry cpettigrew for all your problems.It doesnt seem easy for you.
    Thankyou suziecue.
    I think im not ready to talk to any therapeut here...but when do i know that is time to talk?
    For now i would just be happy with some prozac :)
  • RDR1051
    RDR1051 Posts: 4
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    I hate psychiatrists or any thing close to them.

    What an odd thing for a med student to say. Hmm.
  • RuthSweetTooth
    RuthSweetTooth Posts: 461 Member
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    You just need a big fat hug. You should call your mother right now, or a relative or friend you can count on or relate to you. You are going through so much stress. It is leading to depression. Go look at your med books. It is hard to see clearly when you are in its grips. Depression is a lack of enjoyment in every day activities. Then you have the every day downer of your baby's health to deal with. You must rely on your family network! We're here for you too. I hope you feel better. If you need a friend you can add me. I also believe that you must log everything even if you are binging. This will help curb it. Think of it as your punishment. Try to exercise to compensate the binge calories. Then take a look at my diary and see if you can get ideas. I eat great and do enjoy my food. I'm taking A&P right now so I've had a bit of the taste of your stress. The requirements for med students are completely unreasonable. No wonder you are where you are! Keep reaching out!

    Ruth
  • SherryTeach
    SherryTeach Posts: 2,836 Member
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    I didn't know medical students or doctors had some kind of immunity to mental health issues. Get thyself to a therapist ASAP. There is no need to suffer. You are worth it.
  • tantalee
    tantalee Posts: 130 Member
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    The thing is that the doctors here can be my professors at university and i dont want the professors to know.I try to hide as much as i can my "particular drama" from the outside world.once i had a job that people would be jellous because i had to go 3times a week to the doc with my son.I think that they thought that i was going to shop or to the beach...ignorant people
  • tantalee
    tantalee Posts: 130 Member
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    I hate psychiatrists or any thing close to them.

    What an odd thing for a med student to say. Hmm.

    one thing are medical doctors...other is some one that sits 50mn looking to you and saying "humhum"
  • karip0303
    karip0303 Posts: 5 Member
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    I'm sorry that you are having to go through, and I can totally understand not wanting one of your teachers to be the one you talk to. If you ended up going to one that was your teacher they would just refer you to someone who didn't know you because most therapist will not treat someone they come in regular contact with. However even if they did they are bound by confidentiality so nobody else would know.

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