hurtful comments = motivation?

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  • phoenix8633
    phoenix8633 Posts: 137 Member
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    I think hurtful comments gives me more motivation. Sometimes I have to stare at myself in the mirror which gets me down but then gives me more motivation to lose the weight.
    The worse thing for me is when people e.g. family members know you're dieting and come out with "god you've lost weight" when it is blatantly not true. That just makes me angry not motivated even though I know they're just trying to make you feel better but when you know yourself that you haven't lost weight it just makes things worse. thats for me personally anyway. But now if and when they say it I just say "well i haven't so no need to try and make me feel better" I'm just honest with them!
  • Cold_Steel
    Cold_Steel Posts: 897 Member
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    Depends on who it is coming from an the context. When someone makes an unintentional but extremely honest comment that stings a bit, when someone is intentionally being an asshat I know that their hasshattery inhibits them from having an real valuable credible opinions or perceptions and they can pretty much just sit on a rusted bicycle without a seat.
  • weighlossforbaby
    weighlossforbaby Posts: 847 Member
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    That is horrible!! What a ****. That guy isn't even worth your time.

    I had a similar thing happen - when I was 19, I was so tiny! I think I was... 135 or something? I am 5'7" by the way. I was dating a guy who one night while cuddling on the couch, pinched my stomach skin and said "babe you're so perfect, if you just lost a couple more inches from your stomach..." There are just always going to be people like that out there! These days, if someone tries to take me down like that again, I just turn around and walk away and let them get a good long look at my lovely posterior, which they are kindly invited to kiss. :drinker:
    [/quote]

    I was 125 lbs at 5'7 in 2006 from an ED and after I married hubby in November 2007 he always made me eat which made me gain 50+ lbs in almost 5 years we have been married.
    hahahaha yup. Guys can be so mean! (no offense to any on here) but i've had some horrible experiences...this only being a minor incidient.
    [/quote]
  • SpazzyMal
    SpazzyMal Posts: 276 Member
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    Hurtful comments generally just make me cry. Honest comments are one thing. But if they're just rude and not tactful... then I'd rather not hear it.
  • weighlossforbaby
    weighlossforbaby Posts: 847 Member
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    A month ago I was walking to the trail and a older man was standing in his driveway and said to me "They are teenagers before you know it." He thought I was pregnant and I am not (as far as I know anyways). I told my older sister (she had gastric bypass surgery 6 years ago) what he said and she replied "Yeah, a lot of people thought I was pregnant when I was fat too." I was spending time with my family last month for the holiday and my parents long time friend said "So what size you in now...a 14?" I have NO support anyone except from my husband and twin sister:happy: Not sure if all that hateful comments would be motivation cause they were hateful and mean :frown:
  • lbcbeachbum77
    lbcbeachbum77 Posts: 78 Member
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    Nope... sorry. I was married 16 years married to a man that always put me down, I could never ever lose the weight despite really wanting to please him. Now that he is no longer in my life, I am finally finding ample motivation of my own... the positive, self-loving kind! :wink:
  • pornstarzombie
    pornstarzombie Posts: 297
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    Hurtful comments and bullying is what started me going in middle school/highschool and what fueled my eating disorder.

    So no, it doesn't make me motivated, it hurts my feelings and then I get sent into a self-destructive cycle.

    I workout for me, and me only. My motivation is being healthy to ride my horses to the level of competition I want to be in.
  • hazelovesfood
    hazelovesfood Posts: 454 Member
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    does anyone find that hurtful comments make them more motivated?
    No it would be the opposite for me. I would think no oneis going to tell me that, so Id go eat what i wanted, I dont do it for anyone but me and thats it.
  • hazelovesfood
    hazelovesfood Posts: 454 Member
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    Hurtful comments and bullying is what started me going in middle school/highschool and what fueled my eating disorder.

    So no, it doesn't make me motivated, it hurts my feelings and then I get sent into a self-destructive cycle.

    I workout for me, and me only. My motivation is being healthy to ride my horses to the level of competition I want to be in.
    Exactly, some people are total ****s and they stay that way all there life, WHAT COMES AROUND GOES AROUND.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
  • bmarie612
    bmarie612 Posts: 221 Member
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    I had a guy come to my door asking to clean my windows and I told him "No thanks". Then, walked away he yelled "Jenny Craig!" It hurt... BAD... I was very upset but he just added another reason to my list. I already knew I needed to lose weight.

    A week or so later a girl down the street was yelling down to me as I was walking into my house asking me to jump her car. I just kept walking because I had my son and a bunch of groceries to put inside. She then yelled " Okay, maybe next time FAT *kitten*"

    ... I wouln't say those situations motivated me because I was really sensitive 52 lbs ago. They just gave me a cruel reminder I needed to do something... FAST.
  • jcmartin0313
    jcmartin0313 Posts: 574 Member
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    does anyone find that hurtful comments make them more motivated?
    No it would be the opposite for me. I would think no oneis going to tell me that, so Id go eat what i wanted, I dont do it for anyone but me and thats it.

    Hazel...let me do the opposite then...you are one smokin hot lady!!
  • Arperjen
    Arperjen Posts: 108 Member
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    A long time ago the comments were hurtful (whether intentionally that way or not), but they never did me any good. I've grown a thicker skin over the last 10 years (figuratively AND literally), so the rare times a comment is made to me, I've had to train myself to turn on the "prove them wrong" switch. I come from a childhood of snide comments, backstabbers, and outright liars; it's taken me years to change my mindset and realize that I DO have value, that I am worth the effort. Yes, I still fall victim to the overwhelm sometimes, but I'm human. Just like binge days, you have to get up, dust yourself off, and keep going toward your goal.

    These days, I don't care too much what people think of me physically, nor do I care if they have seen progress or not. That little petty part of me that says "Ha ha, told you so" is aimed and ready come goal day. ;P

    This is a personal change for me, I'm not doing this for anyone else, and the only one I let in on it is my husband - and he's incredibly supportive of me. That's all I need.
  • weighlossforbaby
    weighlossforbaby Posts: 847 Member
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    A long time ago the comments were hurtful (whether intentionally that way or not), but they never did me any good. I've grown a thicker skin over the last 10 years (figuratively AND literally), so the rare times a comment is made to me, I've had to train myself to turn on the "prove them wrong" switch. I come from a childhood of snide comments, backstabbers, and outright liars; it's taken me years to change my mindset and realize that I DO have value, that I am worth the effort. Yes, I still fall victim to the overwhelm sometimes, but I'm human. Just like binge days, you have to get up, dust yourself off, and keep going toward your goal.

    These days, I don't care too much what people think of me physically, nor do I care if they have seen progress or not. That little petty part of me that says "Ha ha, told you so" is aimed and ready come goal day. ;P

    This is a personal change for me, I'm not doing this for anyone else, and the only one I let in on it is my husband - and he's incredibly supportive of me. That's all I need.

    My husband is supportive too!!!! :happy:
  • celebrity328
    celebrity328 Posts: 377 Member
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    The only thing that really hurt me was when I started a gym and my trainer accused me of sneakying food. I was so angry/hurt (wasnt true!) That I set out to prove her wrong :) to date I have lost 48 Lbs without stepping back in that gym! Best pay back was when I saw her in the store about a month ago and was like BAM what now ;D! She was shocked didnt have anything to say!

    So yes It really motivated me! and continues to motivate me but what she thinks really doesnt matter to me
    The look on her face was p r i c e l e s s!
  • winddancer57
    winddancer57 Posts: 9 Member
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    When someone tells me I can't do it,then I feel a strong challenge to show that they are wrong,done it many times
  • enewsome2
    enewsome2 Posts: 355 Member
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    Yes, and no.

    I've had some people say rude things to me about my weight, but now I don't really care. The only person I care about is my own inner voice. No one has to tell me if my body is good or not but me. Otherwise, no amount of criticism could keep me going as hard as I am.

    That being said. Whenever I see someone who has insulted me in the past, it does secretly make me happy that now they're wrong! HA!
  • AmyFett
    AmyFett Posts: 1,607 Member
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    it would honestly just kind of make me think people were *kitten*. It's not like I don't know I'm fat. I'm working on losing it, people should be supportive, but if it were negative comments on a site like this or something, I'd just removed the friend from my list and ignore it.
  • PunkyRachel
    PunkyRachel Posts: 1,959 Member
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    I "try" not to let it phase me. My brother has called me fatty for years, tell me I'll always be a fatty, no matter what I do. My dad says I need to lose weight,(he's always been slender) but yet, refuses to eat my healthy food. :noway: My mom now tells me I'm neglecting my husband because I spend too much time exercising. :grumble: I also lost my best friend of 23 years, because she's pissing I'm losing weight. She barely talks to me or whats to see me anymore.

    Well, I'm setting out to prove them all wrong, I will be a healthy skinny, beautiful and fit lady, someday. No one can stop me!!!
  • julialla
    julialla Posts: 232 Member
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    Oh YES..........I hate to say this or even admit it. But a very (drunk) guy at a party told me that I'm "hot" but would be "so much hotter" if I lost a few pounds and got in shape. And then another guy friend on mine....told me the same thing. Ouch ouch ouch. So, yes, when I want to quit, I think about their comments........Important to say though, I'm not doing this for them! But for me, my health and fitness!
  • DrowningMermaid
    DrowningMermaid Posts: 143
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    it hasn't happened in a long time, but when I do get hurtful or negative comments, I use them. I get angry and take that anger out on my workout. I think about it more, which fuels me further. Sure, it still hurts but in the end maybe it'll do me a little better when I'm hot.

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