My Sister Makes Fun of me when I try to be healthy..

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  • LoserKat2012
    LoserKat2012 Posts: 22
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    Ignore her! She has issues herself. All my life I was compared to my 2 sisters they were much thinner and more shapely than I. Now both out weigh me and I am heavy. You do what you need to do to make yourself feel and look better. The only person you have to please is you.
  • lporter229
    lporter229 Posts: 4,907 Member
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    Oh sweet girl, don't let her issues get you down. Recognize it for what it is, and just love her but most importantly love yourself. :smile:

    Best advice I've seen on this forum.
  • kimad
    kimad Posts: 3,010 Member
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    Sounds like she has huge self esteem issues. Don't listen to her and do your own thing... Maybe she will hop on board.

    When my girlfriend asked me to join her running/eating healthy last year I said 'hell ya becuase if you get thin and I am still fat I will be pissed' I really meant it, but I got off my *kitten* and did something about it... I joined her and we both have succeeded... I had no self esteem back then, I sure do now.
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
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    I think most women have encountered a freind or family member like this in our lives. She's definitely got self-esteem issues and doesn't want you to get more attention than her...which is HER problem (not yours).

    Good luck with your own journey though, and don't let anyone bring you down! I'm sure you're going to blow her away with your results :drinker:
  • lcooke24
    lcooke24 Posts: 115 Member
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    What they all said!!! We are here for you. Use what she says to drive you harder and further. Don't let her get you down!
  • Tall_E
    Tall_E Posts: 182 Member
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    Sorry your sister isn't there for you. You don't have to be lonely though with all these potential great friends here at MFP ready to listen AND cheer you on. Congratulations on having the courage to step out of the family box and make your own healthy life!

    Best wishes!!!
  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
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    She often will say "If you get skinnier than me, I will be so pissed" at first I thought- oh haha, she's kidding.

    But then she would start making fun of the things I was doing..
    Eating Salad or a low Calorie item when we go out to eat.
    Not eating Dessert or having a yogurt instead..
    Eating Fruit or Veggies alone instead of chips & dip or added things.
    Etc.

    But it goes further too..
    If she sees, hears or finds out about a guy flirting with me she'll be like "oh they like everyone" or " I bet their gay"

    I myself have Self Esteem issues & she knows this. So It's so hard having someone who should be that go to person put you down.

    ugh- just needed to vent.

    I call this motivation! Stick it to her, every time you wanna quit or slip up and eat badly use her mouth as fuel for your fire. I used to think of my ex when I needed to stoke my fire, and man I could jog forever thinking of how pissed I was, I worked it out and was a better person for it.
  • krisleve
    krisleve Posts: 7
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    its called sabotage, try to ignore her...she is the one with the issues
  • tberend
    tberend Posts: 91 Member
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    That is not right. She should not, should not, SHOULD NOT do this to you. I don't think you should punch her in the vulva, but I'd definitely have a serious discussion with her and make sure she understands how she's acting. Sometimes people just don't know what they are doing or how they make other people feel. She's your sister but she should know that her actions are jeopardizing the relationship. Good luck and hugs. I hope she comes around.
  • rodneyderrick
    rodneyderrick Posts: 483 Member
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    Dang. She said that a dude has to be gay to like you?
  • jazzhottie
    jazzhottie Posts: 45
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    I've had "friends" do similar things. Just know that it is their own insecurities, bleeding out on you. I've had a hard time with that in the past, but don't let people make you feel guilty for the the good choices you are making in your life. Stay strong, and know that you have lots of people on MFP that will support your healthy changes, and give you encouragement. I found the people in my life who ARE supportive, and try to be around them as much as possible.

    Good luck to you! :-)
  • SweetMegz04
    SweetMegz04 Posts: 459 Member
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    I would lovingly confront her about it. Sisters are forever. She needs to correct the behavior now so that your relationship can be healthy and happy. Let her know how it makes you feel, try to get her in your shoes. Maybe come up with a word, a code word that calls the conversation back to her when she says something hurtful. Try to get her to explore WHY she does this. Yeesh, I'm sorry man. I would be really upset if my sister did that to me. How awful. If nothing helps, just keep your distance, like you said.



    I totally believe that Sisters are forever and will always be there if she needs me. However, I won't treat her as my Best Friend. I just can't do that anymore. There's been many things in the past that made me think "Wow, what the!?" She's gone after guys she knows like me.. tried taking friends, etc.

    Honestly the reasoning behind this is I have done a lot of things she hasn't- I graduated High School and Went to College. I lived on my own, and don't have kids. She dropped out of High School her Sophomore Year, Had her first child at 17, then she got married, had two more kids and got her RN! Her Husband is Super Awesome & She's come a long way. But I often hear I am Selfish, cause I don't have kids... It's difficult but there.
  • jkleon86
    jkleon86 Posts: 245 Member
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    challenge her to lose xx amount by xx time but be encouraging to her, it just might rub off on her.

    My sister use to be that way but then found what clicked for her she "is" smaller then I will ever be but she is very encouraging and suportive now :)
  • DonnaBee20
    DonnaBee20 Posts: 6 Member
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    Sadly there ill always be people who will TRY to bring us down. I feel your pain
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
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    I agree, she's definitely got her own self-esteem issues. Unfortunately, instead of recognizing them for what they are (as you seem to have done for yourself), she's taking them out on you. Those we love are easy targets, as bass-ackwards as it may seem. Hopefully recognizing it for what it is will help you let it go, but perhaps a candid discussion is in order.
  • SweetMegz04
    SweetMegz04 Posts: 459 Member
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    Dang. She said that a dude has to be gay to like you?

    Yea, that sucks right!? I have had to have other people support the fact that so and so isn't gay and doesnt like everyone.
  • MFPBrandy
    MFPBrandy Posts: 564 Member
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    I have the same problem, but with all my friends. To them I'm the "New, boring Katie"...
    Sounds like it's time to get some new friends who like you for YOU, not how you eat or party (or whatever it was).
  • emilypurplefrog
    emilypurplefrog Posts: 92 Member
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    I would suggest trying to get her to jump on board with you. Even if she doesn't have to lose anything, she may see that the choices you are making are actually good and it could possibly even help y'all grow closer together.
  • geekyjock76
    geekyjock76 Posts: 2,720 Member
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    I have the same problem, but with all my friends. To them I'm the "New, boring Katie"...
    My friends jokingly picked on me as well. They'd invite me to eat but I'd always either bring a protein bar or eat before we met. Over time, they got used to it and stopped nagging me. And judging by your photos, "boring" is certainly not a way I'd describe you!
  • HeavyLiftGirl
    HeavyLiftGirl Posts: 1,267 Member
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    Sisters are competitive. I know-- I have two of them! We also often get jealous of each other's bodies when one of us starts to look better. Don't let it get to you!

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