I keep giving up, what can I do?

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  • GinaSmash
    GinaSmash Posts: 37 Member
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    “No matter who you are, no matter what you do, you absolutely, positively do have the power to change.” ~Bill Phillips
  • spectralmoon
    spectralmoon Posts: 1,230 Member
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    Something you might try is giving yourself constant visual reminders. Put pictures or quotes on the fridge, on your bathroom mirror, in the office. They can be positive or negative depending on what your respond better do. I'm better when I'm mean to myself. Haha. I literally have post it on my computer at work that says, "Don't be a wuss." (The one on my bathroom mirror at home has more colorful language.)You can post pictures that inspire what you want for yourself or things that remind you that it's a constant fight.

    Don't look to the end goal. Just focus on today, and if you mess up today, re-focus tomorrow.

    This is what I've had to do to keep myself motivated; I personally found someone on Facebook (a slim and fit seamstress that models her own clothes) that has become my "thinspiration" and when I see something that, in the back of my mind, sets off that small, "Hey. You're f*in' up," voice, I think of that seamstress and wonder, "Is this [spaghetti/extra handful of cookies/etc.] worth it when it keeps me away from looking like that?"

    When I forget, meh. Sometimes that happens. But when I remember, this actually helps me a lot.
  • JuneyJo
    JuneyJo Posts: 181 Member
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    Where do I go from here, what is going to make me lose the weight again? I feel like it's hopeless.

    Two things that have worked for me when I got to giving up:
    My coach said to give myself a cheat day. When I felt like I couldn't go w/o some sort of awesome treat, I should allow myself ONE and only ONE day per week when I could eat whatever I wanted. I discovered that, while I may allow for a piece of birthday cake, I wasn't going to go crazy all day long after all my hard work the rest of the week. It kind of made me really think about what I was doing and what mattered.
    Second, I was whining to a friend about how I couldn't motivate myself to start a workout routine. He said "You don't have to start a routine. Just get up and move today." That took the edge off it somehow. It's not about the entire journey in one glance. It's just about taking the next step right now.

    I hope that helps you the way it has me. Hang in there!
  • rininger85
    rininger85 Posts: 131
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    its not about how many times you get knocked down, but about how many times you get back up... just keep getting back up and trying again... you only lose when you quit getting back up.
  • bwcrouch
    bwcrouch Posts: 105 Member
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    LIsten to cookiefluff, and check out the success stories of other MFPers who find success in eating more. Success is getting back up one more time than falling down.
  • beattie1
    beattie1 Posts: 1,012 Member
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    Stop giving up.

    That is the best advice you'll ever get. There is no magic pill for building confidence or quick solution to maintaining your determination. In my opinion, you must take things one day at a time. I went through the exact same situation, myself. It's difficult for me to face people who remember seeing me forty pounds lighter, but I use it as motivation. Or I should say that I CHOOSE to use it as motivation. It is a choice that I consciously make.

    Thinking positive is a choice we all have to consciously make at times, and especially at first, but it will make all the difference.

    Now I've got a little tough love for you. You've already acknowledged that you need to make a mental change - so, what is stopping you? Like eating healthy, like working out, thinking positively must become a habit. You messed up? Okay. Own your mistake and use it. Why did you overeat, skip the gym, whatever it was that happened? What can you do next time to prevent it? Pat yourself on the back for realizing - hey, I screwed up, and then making the choice to move forward anyway.

    Fail, try again, fail, try again - and stop letting yourself turn a temporary lapse in judgment or effort become a long-term excuse to give up. I have to remind myself of this every single day: "Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts."

    Chin up! You're not alone, and you CAN do this.

    Thetrapezeswinger's absolutely nailed it! :drinker: Keep on keeping on.
    When / if you have a bad day, put it behind you and start again.
    Don't reduce your calories by too much - eat 1200 (or whatever number MFP suggests) + at least some of your exercise calories if you classed yourself as sedentary so that you don't get too hungry.
    You're making a lifestyle change so you don't want to deprive yourself to an unsustainable extent.

    Having taken a peek at your diary I would also stress that you are not eating nearly enough calories to be able to keep this diet up for more than a few days at most. I would be ravenous by the end of the first day & ready to eat the carpet. No wonder you can't keep it up!

    Why not go back to "Goals" and "Settings" and reset your calorie allowance to what MFP recommends - you'll find it much easier to stick to your healthy eating plan when you're only a few hundred calories short every day, instead of being thousands adrift. Then you'll be more able to see a long-term weight loss that you'll be able to maintain.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
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    LIsten to cookiefluff...

    Now there's a phrase I thought I would never read...
  • GeekGirl23
    GeekGirl23 Posts: 517 Member
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    For me, I had to realize that I was worth the effort. For so long I have put everyone and everything else first. No longer am I doing that. In these efforts my marriage has gotten better because I have changed, I feel better, and am more positive about myself. I haven't lost much yet but I've gained already this love of myself. This caring enough to want to keep improving.

    No amount of goodies, fast food, or anything will get in my way now. Sometimes you have to hit a new low to realize no one can change you but you and if you set your mind to it you can do it!
  • sthrnchick
    sthrnchick Posts: 771
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    You will ALWAYS keep giving up...UNTIL YOU ARE READY to make the change....100%!!! Until then...why waste your time? Eat a cookie! When you are ready...quitting will not be an option!
  • lisarenee_x0
    lisarenee_x0 Posts: 16
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    You need to break your addiction to this behavior. I love food, but I have to resist eating what I want to eat. It's hard, it isn't easy. I got in a slump a while back, and it got to where I just told myself not to think about it and just do what needed to be done - my exercising. I was in the first stages of pregnancy, and I was extremely fatigued. Instead of sitting there thinking about when I would walk later in the day or thinking I should just put it off until tomorrow, I just shoved it to the back of my mind and stepped on the treadmill. The self is a hard thing to control... just have to tell yourself no when you want that ice cream or whatever weakness it is you have, my weakness is sweets!
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
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    I just don't know what the answer is...well I do but mentally it seems unattainable to me. I've recently gained 20 lbs that I know I need to lose now before my weight spirals out of control even more. I lost so much weight about over a year ago, I was feeling fantastic and people were always commenting on what a great job I did, how good I looked and how I did it.
    It was easy at the time...I cut back my calories and exercised for about an hour everyday so I know HOW to lose it physically but not mentally.

    I don't know what is wrong with me, I wake up feeling all motivated that I can lose the weight but then I fall back into my same patterns of over eating and binging.

    Where do I go from here, what is going to make me lose the weight again? I feel like it's hopeless.
    Be careful posting on here. Some people are really harsh!
    Just filter the good from the bad comments ;)

    I think you got some really harsh comments because you were complaining about losing a health amount of weight.
  • beattie1
    beattie1 Posts: 1,012 Member
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    I haven't seen any harsh comments. Lots of encouragement to keep trying though.
  • nikki_mar
    nikki_mar Posts: 32 Member
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    I haven't seen any harsh comments. Lots of encouragement to keep trying though.

    I'm with you. Unless I skipped a page, I haven't seen any harsh ones either.

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