Need advice from "Bulkers"...

Not for me - but, my husband. Since I've been losing a fair amount of weight on a pretty regular basis, he is starting to get paranoid... He asked me if he was too skinny. I think he is concerned that I'm going to get eyes for someone else - which I assured him won't happen. Regardless - he wants to start putting on some muscle and asked me if I would post for him to get some info of what he ought to be doing.

Stats: He is 28, 5'10", and 130 lbs - very thin framed. (I'm talking - I look like a walrus standing next to him.) He's been this way most of his life, he doesn't eat super healthy - except for the meals that I make for him. He's big on sweets/fats/carbs. He doesn't ever gain weight. In the 7 years we've been together I've gained and lost 60 or so pounds, but he's never gotten above 130. He doesn't ever work out, but I don't think he is opposed to it. He keeps saying, "I need to go to the gym" and things like that.

Any advice?
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Replies

  • taylor5877
    taylor5877 Posts: 1,792 Member
    Get him in the gym doing squats, deadlifts, bench press, shoulder press, lat pull downs/pull ups, and rows for the middle back.

    Probably needs to eat in the ballpark of 4000 calories.

    He will gain some fat with muscle, but as a default lean guy should be fine once he's hit a bit over a weight he likes (have to burn off the fat later).
  • McBully4
    McBully4 Posts: 1,270 Member
    Get him in the gym doing squats, deadlifts, bench press, shoulder press, lat pull downs/pull ups, and rows for the middle back.

    Probably needs to eat in the ballpark of 4000 calories.

    He will gain some fat with muscle, but as a default lean guy should be fine once he's hit a bit over a weight he likes (have to burn off the fat later).

    In a nutshell
  • CookieCatCatcher
    CookieCatCatcher Posts: 324 Member
    Thanks guys - is there anything in particular he ought to be eating? 4000 cals is like triple what I eat... LOL!
  • CookieCatCatcher
    CookieCatCatcher Posts: 324 Member
    Oh - and I can pack his snacks/lunches, and make his breakfasts too. I've got no problem helping him attain his goals in any way I can. He is super supportive of mine, so it's the least I can do.
  • DixiedoesMFP
    DixiedoesMFP Posts: 935 Member
    I'm responding to get the attention of some of my male MFP friends....but eat a lot, lots of protein, and pick up heavy things.
  • psuLemon
    psuLemon Posts: 38,426 MFP Moderator
    Thanks guys - is there anything in particular he ought to be eating? 4000 cals is like triple what I eat... LOL!

    Lean meats, (aka lots of protein) and protiein shakes can help and probably should be aiming to get 150g's of protein at least.
  • CookieCatCatcher
    CookieCatCatcher Posts: 324 Member
    I'm responding to get the attention of some of my male MFP friends....but eat a lot, lots of protein, and pick up heavy things.

    Thanks, I appreciate your help!
  • chadbobby
    chadbobby Posts: 11
    Alo
    Thanks guys - is there anything in particular he ought to be eating? 4000 cals is like triple what I eat... LOL!
    Along with proteins he needs carbs, pasta, potatoes,etc... u can also seek weight gainers from a vitamin shop.
  • CookieCatCatcher
    CookieCatCatcher Posts: 324 Member
    We eat a lot of lean meat, so that wont be hard - but, he eats like a bird. I'm not joking at all when I say 2 slices of pizza is all he can handle, and whenever we go out to eat, he brings at least half of his meal home. (Man - if I had taken my hunger cues from him a long time ago - I wouldn't need to lose this weight!)
  • psuLemon
    psuLemon Posts: 38,426 MFP Moderator
    We eat a lot of lean meat, so that wont be hard - but, he eats like a bird. I'm not joking at all when I say 2 slices of pizza is all he can handle, and whenever we go out to eat, he brings at least half of his meal home. (Man - if I had taken my hunger cues from him a long time ago - I wouldn't need to lose this weight!)

    I have found that if i increase the frequency of my meals, I was then able to increase the amounts. So if you normally eat 6 oz of chicken, slowly increase to 7 oz and then 8 oz. Over time, the ability to eat higher quantities will improve. I have also found muscle milk to be very helpful as it's 300 caloris for two scoops. Also, cooking foods in EVOO and eating stuff like nuts and peanut butter help a lot.
  • hesn92
    hesn92 Posts: 5,966 Member
    wow I could have written this post lol :) My boyfriend is pretty thin and since I've started working out and such he's gotten all insecure I feel like. Sometimes he will point out muscular men when we're out and ask me if I like that or want him to look like that! LOL. He's not quite that small though, he's 6'5 and weighs around 190 but he's really skinny even though he is a framer. (builds houses) He's basically lifting and carrying heavy things all day long! He is really very strong but you couldn't tell by looking at him. And he eats like a horse so I really don't understand how he stays so thin. Maybe his metabolism will slow down one of these days?
  • fhsjewfro
    fhsjewfro Posts: 101 Member
    get on a legit program like starting strength or stronglifts

    eat lots of food, mainly in carbs and protein, a really good method is 40% carbs, 40% protein, and 20% fats, thats a rather lean bulk

    hardest thing for him will be to eat more, try to get him to start logging his food using MFP

    start at 3000 cals until he can comfortably eat that amount every day with no problem, then add 300 cals till he can eat 3300 cals with no problem each day, and so on till he gets to around 4000 cals. once he gets to 4000 cals a day just tell him to pay attention to the scale, if its not moving, add 100 cals to each day, wait a week or two, if its still not moving add another 100 cals, and so on and so on

    hope that helps a little bit, good luck!
  • chadbobby
    chadbobby Posts: 11
    We eat a lot of lean meat, so that wont be hard - but, he eats like a bird. I'm not joking at all when I say 2 slices of pizza is all he can handle, and whenever we go out to eat, he brings at least half of his meal home. (Man - if I had taken my hunger cues from him a long time ago - I wouldn't need to lose this weight!)

    I have found that if i increase the frequency of my meals, I was then able to increase the amounts. So if you normally eat 6 oz of chicken, slowly increase to 7 oz and then 8 oz. Over time, the ability to eat higher quantities will improve. I have also found muscle milk to be very helpful as it's 300 caloris for two scoops. Also, cooking foods in EVOO and eating stuff like nuts and peanut butter help a lot.
    ^^^^This
  • mustgetmuscles1
    mustgetmuscles1 Posts: 3,346 Member
    I found this video very helpful for setting up calories and macros (protein, fats and carbs).

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLhtjYoU9aQ

    To me, it makes far more sense to base macros off body weight and actual need than percentages but thats just my opinion.

    Since he is brand new to lifting he should try to maximize the gain new lifters see by eating in a surplus around 500. He can adjust this later if he starts getting a little squishy. : )

    Next is to pick a program. Starting strength or stronglifts will work great. Pretty much any program will show gains especially with a new lifter but stick to it for a few months before changing to something else. Muscle gain takes a long time. All the new weight and bulkiness you see in the first couple weeks will be a lot of water retention. It is hard not to mistake it for real mass gain.

    That being said drink a lot of water. : )
  • CookieCatCatcher
    CookieCatCatcher Posts: 324 Member
    Which would be better Stronglifts or Starting Strength - he does have a disc problem in his back - but his Dr told him working out might help repair it - since it's due to poor muscle quality?
  • trelm249
    trelm249 Posts: 777 Member
    Which would be better Stronglifts or Starting Strength - he does have a disc problem in his back - but his Dr told him working out might help repair it - since it's due to poor muscle quality?

    Flip a coin. Both are good. The main things is focus on form at first and be consistent in all aspects; food, gym, rest. But you know based on your own experience. The other thing is reinforce for him, that it is about building a better him. There is no comparing himself to some other guy in the gym and quitting because he had an ego issue.
  • CookieCatCatcher
    CookieCatCatcher Posts: 324 Member
    Which would be better Stronglifts or Starting Strength - he does have a disc problem in his back - but his Dr told him working out might help repair it - since it's due to poor muscle quality?

    Flip a coin. Both are good. The main things is focus on form at first and be consistent in all aspects; food, gym, rest. But you know based on your own experience. The other thing is reinforce for him, that it is about building a better him. There is no comparing himself to some other guy in the gym and quitting because he had an ego issue.

    I totally understand what you are saying. He's done a fantastic job reinforcing my new habits - so I want to do the same for him.

    Just about everything I'm reading in vs and comparisons online say the SL program might be slightly better for true beginners or people with back problems - so I suppose I'll get him the info on that.

    Again, I really appreciate everyones help.

    It won't do to have my man thinking I'm going to run off. :) I just want to be a supportive as possible.
  • Wonderob
    Wonderob Posts: 1,372 Member
    I think he is concerned that I'm going to get eyes for someone else - which I assured him won't happen.
    Any advice?

    You've been given some good advice from the guys on here, but I wouldn't tell him by starting "I've been chatting to some really nice muscley guys online...."
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    I think he is concerned that I'm going to get eyes for someone else - which I assured him won't happen.
    Any advice?

    You've been given some good advice from the guys on here, but I wouldn't tell him by starting "I've been chatting to some really nice muscley guys online...."

    LOL!!!! Right, you'd best say you just googled the info!
  • CookieCatCatcher
    CookieCatCatcher Posts: 324 Member
    I think he is concerned that I'm going to get eyes for someone else - which I assured him won't happen.
    Any advice?

    You've been given some good advice from the guys on here, but I wouldn't tell him by starting "I've been chatting to some really nice muscley guys online...."

    Hahahaha - No. I just told him that I knew some guys on MFP who were there to gain. So he asked me to get their advice. :) Personally - I prefer lean guys to muscular ones. Farmer boys.
  • wackyfunster
    wackyfunster Posts: 944 Member
    As a total novice lifter, he can probably put on ~2 lbs./month for a while, and should take advantage of that while it lasts. Eating about a 500 cal daily surplus should work. It is almost obscenely easy for a noob lifter to get great results, so just getting in the habit of lifting and eating right should be all he needs to see great results. Later on if he sticks with it and starts slowing down, feel free to post again and you can get advice on a more involved routine, but for now simple is best!

    Here's the rundown:

    Diet:
    Eat ~500 cals/day surplus.
    Eat 1g protein/pound lean body mass.
    If fat gain seems excessive (it shouldn't), reduce caloric suplus.
    On lifting days, after lifting, get at least 300g carbs, around 100g of which can be sugar (I like Frosted Flakes for this personally). This will aid recovery and help with muscle synthesis.
    Lean meats, fruits, and veggies are preferred, but eating a little bit of junk won't hurt.
    If sufficient caloric intake is difficult, whole milk is amazing for adding calories.

    Workout:
    Look at Starting Strength, or StrongLifts 5x5 or 5/3/1 for good beginner programs (any one of those should work). These should give great results until around 'intermediate' strength levels (www.strstd.com for nice strength standards calculator).
    Work out in the morning if at all possible.
    The only cardio that should be done is walking or very low intensity steady state. If he really wants to do cardio, 1-2 days/week of HIIT is probably OK as well, but make sure to account for calorie burn to maintain your caloric surplus.

    As long as body fat gain isn't excessive, I wouldn't worry about it... it's a _LOT_ easier to get rid of body fat than it is to gain muscle.

    Hope this helps!
  • icculus19
    icculus19 Posts: 39
    he can hit the gym hard all day and eat like 4000 cals a day but it all comes down to genetics. if he is a small framed guy his body more than likely wont let him blow up like the hulk, however he could put on some really good lean muscle mass and look shredded. he needs to add like 20 lbs IMHO but he does ot rite he could look like tyler derdant. he should def up his diet to atleast 200 cals per day i would recommended a mass gainer. you can find these at gns or vitamine shop. def go to the gym start off slow dont go so heavy where he cant move for like 3 days. he should bench fles, lat pull downs, tbar rows shoulder press, squat or leg press, leg extensions. i would have him start off at 4 sets of 8-12 reps. from there he can adjust the weight up or down the reps a sets up or down.
  • albinogorilla
    albinogorilla Posts: 1,056 Member
    have him start his own account and ask for himself

    that would be a good start on his road to being a "big boy"

    He needs to eat ALOT and lift ALOT, and skip cardio, it will only require him to eat more. I haven't weighed 130 since i was 12, and i am only 5' 7"
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    have him start his own account and ask for himself

    that would be a good start on his road to being a "big boy"

    This is pretty much my thought on it too. I was going to say something earlier but laid off, but I'll cosign this comment.

    There are stages. " I need to go to the gym" has to be replaced by" I want to go to the gym" which has to be replaced by "I JOINED a gym". Then point him in our direction.

    If I were you I wouldn't lay out any of this info to him right now, especially if he's already feeling insecure. Giving him bodybuilding advice is about the same as me bringing home breast implant brochures and putting them with my wife's mail. It's going to feel like pressure, and pressure and insecurity do not a good cocktail make.
  • xd2005
    xd2005 Posts: 8 Member
    Don't worry...give him a couple years and the pounds will just magically appear. I'm 31 and have, what sounds like, the same frame as your husband (about 5'8, around 130-135lbs until I was 30). Literally, it seems when I hit 30 a switch flipped and I started slowly gaining. Couple months ago I got up to 145, which is fine, but the problem was I gained it by eating junk (fast food, sweets) and it surely wasn't muscle gain.

    I decided to take the approach of losing the weight I'd gained first, then work on bulking up. I've lost the weight (down to 128), now working on making the switch over to bulking (really, just trying to commit myself to the gym time). Eating the calories is easy...eating the right calories to reach the goal is the hard part.

    It's also difficult with a spouse trying to do the opposite (lose weight instead of gain). When I'm working on 2,100 calories (should probably up that) and her on like 1,400 makes meals difficult. Best of luck!
  • compound exercises and 200g + of protein; low fat/high carbs
  • kaervaak
    kaervaak Posts: 274 Member
    If he's having a really hard time adding weight while eating healthy (i.e. adding muscle instead of fat) he can try the GOMAD diet (or a portion of it at least). Basically, if someone is having a hard time eating enough to gain weight, they can just add a bunch of whole milk to their diet for good, high quality protein, fat and carbs. GOMAD stands for gallon of milk a day and that's exactly what it is. Eat healthy food and if you're not gaining, drink milk and lots of it.
  • If he's having a really hard time adding weight while eating healthy (i.e. adding muscle instead of fat) he can try the GOMAD diet (or a portion of it at least). Basically, if someone is having a hard time eating enough to gain weight, they can just add a bunch of whole milk to their diet for good, high quality protein, fat and carbs. GOMAD stands for gallon of milk a day and that's exactly what it is. Eat healthy food and if you're not gaining, drink milk and lots of it.

    >recommends being healthy
    >suggests GOMAD

    lol
  • kaervaak
    kaervaak Posts: 274 Member

    >recommends being healthy
    >suggests GOMAD

    lol

    I don't see what the problem is. If he eats healthy, protein rich meals high in fiber and good fats, it's really easy to feel full after not eating a ton of calories. If he's having a hard time putting on weight, GOMAD is a decent option. Much better than stuffing himself with lower quality foods that are high in calories but less filling and void of essential nutrients.
  • gregpack
    gregpack Posts: 426 Member
    Gomad has it's following. If you were going to drink a gallon of milk every day for the rest of your life, I'd be concerned, but as a short term weight gain, I I wouldn't freak out about it.

    Nuts and nut butters are very calorie dense, I'd start packing those with his meals.

    He doesn't drink a lot of caffeinated beverages like mtn dew, does he? I've seen tons of rail thin guys drink that stuff like water, I don;t know if it is coincidence or not though.....