Hating myself.

hopefloatsup

wow I'm so jealous of your snack platter. my snack would be only the stick of cheese lol. Hooray for having a bigger cal allowance though! Know that there are people out here jealous of your snack cal allowance and cheering you on. Wishing the best for you and happy snacking. Snacks are just as important to me as meals. I plan them meticulously and my eating plan would not work without them, so I am so proud of you for figuring out this important part of your eating. You have the puzzle solved now it's just follow through, you got this! :flowerforyou:

I've never thought of it as a puzzle, but in reality, it truly is! One piece at a time and it all will fall together eventually right?

giveMEbeauty

We all feel crappy at times! But u can do this

Timshel_

How do I get past the point of feeling disgusted and worthless?

You are NOT worthless. As a matter of fact, you are pretty much dealing with an issue that many people here are. We have ignored ourselves for so long and gotten ourselves into the worst habits physcially and mentally we ever could have, it seems like a useless battle. And we take that out on ourselves that if the battle is useless, we are in turn useless...worhtless, disgusting....etc. But that is NOT true.

Say it with me chica! "I am not worthless and this struggle will NOT define me!"

But it IS a struggle. You need to fight against yourself, your bad habits, your negative thoughts, your own persona of neglect and indlugence that you have cultivated. You, THE REAL YOU, is down inside wanting to get past it all and you ahve the will to do it. But you have to overcome your mind and body to do it. At some point though, all of it will align.

It isn't a diet. It isn't quick. It isn't easy. It daily challenge that you commit to yourself for the rest of your life. Thought the ups and downs, through thick and thin (litterally), and till death do you part! Commitment, consistency, and courage!

Keep making the best choices you can. Maybe start with one trouble area and when you feel you have a grasp on that, work in another, then another, then another, etc.

You CAN do it.
You ARE NOT worthless.
YOU ARE WORTH IT!

rhinesb

You know I always feel better when I confront my problems. It seems that you have a few you need to work through.

One: you and hubby need to compromise. Some give and take. Let him know how important it is for you to get healthy. That you've been feeling really bad physically which is making you feel bad mentally. Then find a compromise with eating out (say a place that serves healthy alternatives). Meaning my husband and I used to go to this down home seafood place. They served the best fried foods. That used to be something I LOVED to eat. Well one day we went there while I was trying to eat healthier. Though that fried shrimp and fish tempted me to no end I decided to try out the blackened fish and sweet potato with no butter. I love sweet potatoes. I enjoyed it and when I left I felt great. Unfortunately my hubby ate a glutinous amount of fried foods and was totally miserable after dinner.

Two: The best way for me to control my emotional eating is making sure that I have no foods in the house that trigger it my eating. I have a rule that I won't bring in already made desserts in to the house. All desserts will have to be home made. And any pre-prepared junk food for the kids will always be something that I don't like. Though once I took junk out of the house the kids loved the fruit I brought in instead. Also if it is just something that hubby wants then I keep it out of sight. Out of sight usually is out of mind. I finally gave up diet coke after realizing that (even though I knew it was unhealthy) it was making me bloated. It has been 6 weeks and I've only had one carbonated beverage. I also made a promise to myself that I would do something every day to be healthier. So when I feel good I have a good work out and when I feel sluggish and terrible I do as much as I can. I have found that if I take a day off then I end up being sluggish the next day and am more likely to take a second day off which leads to a second that turns in to a week. Come up with a plan that you can stick with. Start small. One habit at a time.

three: you have to love yourself! Size doesn't dictate your worth. It is inside that matters. You have the unconditional love of your children. I know I've had my share of ups and downs and what has helped me in the past is confronting my feelings. Why do you hate yourself? Make a list? What is good about you? Make a list. Ask your loved one's what makes you special if you can't think of anything good about you. I am very sure there is plenty it is just that sometimes we tend to get bogged down by our 'failures'. Think of those "failures" as just bumps in the road. Once you have made a list look at it critically and ask yourself if it actually makes sense that you are so harsh on yourself. Then attack those problems that are dragging you down. You need to know that you are more than just successes or failures! And if there are things that are dragging you down then you do what you need to do to get rid of them.

I liked a lot of the other people's thoughts and advice.

rhinesb

How do I get past the point of feeling disgusted and worthless?

You are NOT worthless. As a matter of fact, you are pretty much dealing with an issue that many people here are. We have ignored ourselves for so long and gotten ourselves into the worst habits physcially and mentally we ever could have, it seems like a useless battle. And we take that out on ourselves that if the battle is useless, we are in turn useless...worhtless, disgusting....etc. But that is NOT true.

I totally agree. I think a big part of it is losing yourself. Many of us as moms, dads, husbands, wives, lose ourselves in everyone else. I was giving all that I had to others and took little or nothing for myself.

I felt guilty leaving my girls in my husband's care so I can exercise for an hour. Though hubby told me I should take time for myself, when I actually did he would get mad and make snide little remarks about how everything was all about me and that I was taking his time for himself away from him. He was going through a depressed time in his life where he hated his job.

I never had ME time. And we all deserve ME time. My husband doesn't act like that anymore thank goodness. But it did take time for him to get that he was subconsciously undermining my weight loss. I had a lot of resentment of him back then. I often wonder if he did that because he was worried that if he was fat and I was not then I would have more options than just being married to him. Which was stupid but sometimes we aren't so bright. Now that he has lost a ton of weight he no longer tries to put obstacles in my way.

Just remember that you are not alone. Though your situation is not the same as what I dealt with it is still something that you will have to wade through and fix.

I fixed my situation by telling myself that I was worthy. That I deserved to take time for myself. That by taking time for me I created a happier me. A happier me created a happier mom which created happier children which made a happier family.

hopefloatsup

It's been 6 weeks and recent posters....you have NO idea how much I needed this reminder again lately. Summer seems to be evil with no schedule as much with the kids running around, daylight lasting longer, and many nights of not eating meals together. At the same time, though, we're going non stop, so it gives me less boredom eating too. AND a lot more fruits & veggies available right now as well. As of this morning's weigh-in, I've officially lost 12 pounds in 6 weeks. I'm starting to see a difference in myself. Small differences, but still differences. I've cheated, but it seems if I don't let the guilt about it consume me, I get right back on track with no issues. It really is amazing how much difference a good outlook can make.

Thank you all again for giving me that push....to see what I deserve. I appreciate it so much!

born2drum

You've just got to suck it up and get your stuff together.

Quit sitting around and feeling sorry for yourself because that doesn't actually accomplish anything.

If you truly want the results you say you do then you need to put some action behind it.

This! Stop it! Snap out of it! No one can motivate you but yourself and the mirror. Stop feeling sorry and use that towrds your goals.