We broke up because...
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Because she didn't wanna be barefoot and pregnant0
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he wanted to practice polygamy cuz one pregnant wife didn't do it for him0
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Didn't understand my sexual needs...0
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I had to cut him off when he invited the livestock into the game0
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Her name was lorena bobbitt...0
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he/I mean she had to change her identity0
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It was all a blur. I just know it included a plane ride, Las Vegas, showgirls, alcohol and lights.0
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found a bunch of fake ID's at her house. Didn't really know who she was0
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He knew to much and I had to "Erase" him!0
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She wiped all my electronics to erase all traces of her0
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she spent more time with her electronics than with me - I need human interaction0
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She called me an Illegal Alien!0
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I saw her riding a broom one night! I swear!0
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He got swept away0
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He mysteriously disappeared one night after witnessing something he shouldn't have!0
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She lost her head!0
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She was more engrossed in her murder mystery writing than me - I was merely a shadow in her mind0
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offered to cook dinner for me and I heard chanting bubble bubble toil and trouble0
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I'm pretty sure she was a figment of my imagination!0
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She had a weak imagination0
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She made me weak in the knees.,.i had to carry her everywhere0
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discovered she had an "imaginary" friend0
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She was always on her knees.. and not for me either.0
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always needed me to get something off the top shelf in cabinets when the game was on0
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he stole my dresses.0
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lol she didn't like my fetishes0
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She dressed in Gunny Sacks and Black Garbage bags0
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toe licking and nose picking are not fetishes I can get into!!0
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lol she wouldn't try new things0
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He wanted to try doing it in a Dumpster!0
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