We broke up because...

Spnneil06

I never wore her good boots, but a side girl stole them!! Not my fault!

MikeCrazy

She stole my boots instead.

MathDonkey

His boots were made for walkin

ovinas1

He couldn't solve the Hodge conjecture.

MathDonkey

His standards were too high

Spnneil06

He wanted me to take part in "naked weekends" I wasn't comfortable when my mom visited.

MikeCrazy

Wouldn't share snacks with me.

FabulousFantasticFifty

He wouldn't let me get high!

MathDonkey

She was always trying to climb *kitten*

Spnneil06

I always caught him with fab, can't blame him.

ovinas1

She said she wanted Gucci, but I could only afford Fucci.

mraudit2000

Finally figured out I wasn't into dudes.

Stoshew71

I always caught her with fab. I couldn't blame fab.

Spnneil06

I caught him with two different men!

Stoshew71

Well you stop caring.

MathDonkey

He was too whiney

Spnneil06

He started dressing nicer, I think he was trying to impress someone else.

ovinas1

She told me she wanted to date more mature older men

MaxPower0102

She started undressing at the most inappropriate times. I think she was trying to impress someone else

blueeyesgrace

He didn't like the fact that tequila makes my clothes fall off....

tomlockhart

I was too much of a freak

WarDamnJay

She drank all my tequila!!!

BlueEyedRedhead

He wouldn't share his tequila!

MaxPower0102

I ate her M&Ms

MathDonkey

She was always drinking all my booze

MikeCrazy

He wouldn't build a fort with me.

MathDonkey

I Just wouldn't build a CRAPPY fort. My fort building was too intense for him

Stoshew71

He didn't like the way I pitched my tent.

ovinas1

every time the wind blew the tent would fall over.

Spnneil06

I would laugh and he would yell.