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We broke up because...
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Wanted to get married straight away0
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She called me Chris....1
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Wouldn't dance for me0
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Wanted me to do the worm in the middle of Walmart.1
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Too hilarious 4me0
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She hated that she couldn't stay mad at me.0
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Couldn't stop laughing at him
^^^
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Ate too much candy0
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Drank too much brandy1
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was too mysterious0
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Threw barbells at my head..that girl was strong0
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She had a head injury that made her MEAN!!!0
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all she wanted to lift was nutella sticks!0
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Called me names like ..jelly belly..lard butt and fatty boom pa0
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Hated my Pet names for her0
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You needed a diary to record all the pet names she used! Was becoming too much to handle0
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Wasn't organized0
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Tried to put my life on a schedule0
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She kept eating my secret stash of cookies0
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Didn' want an alarm clock?!?!?!0
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He kept buying Biscoffs because he preferred me meaty !0
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Because of my fascination for lollipops0
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He was always putting on a blonde curly wig and singing Shirley Temple songs.0
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It's all true0
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You just couldn't talk to him0
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Just too bright for my dark self...0
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Wouldn't share her chocolate0
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Chose chocolate over me0
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So jealous of choco...0
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Refused to eat vegetables0
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