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We broke up because...
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I worked for a Demolition Company0
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She demo'd my house!0
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I got the addresses confused0
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She is only willing to learn numbers, not alphabets0
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Her mum was better in bed0
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He was celibate..
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She was too much into pleasuring herself.
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He wouldn't let me win in the 1/4 mile.0
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Everything was competition, who could run the fastest, who could eat the fastest.. when she followed me into the bathroom with a time clock, I was done.0
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She took to long in the bathroom and always made me late for work!0
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While I didn't mind that she took up both sides of the bed, I was slightly annoyed that she shared it with others not including me...
#SharingIsCaring?0 -
He wont participate in #FreeLove0
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I don't know why, we were drunk, it was a mistake, let's just be together again!0
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Are you gonna stop showing off your body to everyone in town???!!!
But don't really
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FabulousFantasticFifty wrote: »Are you gonna stop showing off your body to everyone in town???!!!
Yes I am. I reside under the tutaledge and mindset of Matthew Mcconaughey. We don't wear shirts! I didn't realize this was a deal breaker.
DEAL'S OFF!
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she was too good for me.0
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He parties too much0
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She would always freak me out by standing next to immediate-death-fall type cliffs.1
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He stopped worshiping me and my pretty feet2
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I wasn't willing to suck her toes
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She wouldn't suck anything. I mean I had a cupboard full of lollipops and she wouldn't help me get rid of them.0
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I tried the lollipop-in-my-pocket line. Didn't work.1
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He obviously didn't know me at all.0
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RunHardBeStrong wrote: »He obviously didn't know me at all.
Finally figured out, I don't know who the heck she is.0 -
He found my Diary!
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He never wanted to make the first move0
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