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We broke up because...
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Always in the dirt0
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Not in the dirt enough.
(I knew I would get called out on the pic)0 -
Couldn't appreciate that her pic was eloquent0
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Too nice. Not breaking up.0
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Smothered me in kindness0
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Took better selfies than me0
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Always keeping score0
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Wasn't up with all the cool kid sayings0
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Asked me to bust through a wall like the Kool Aid man0
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Kept saying "oh yea" when sitting on the toilet0
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Never gave me any privacy0
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Kept telling me to "come look at this"
Ummm no thank you0 -
wanted to have a "pissing for distance contest" then bragged when he won0
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Was always pissed at me0
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If I told her I was going to fix something. I was. I didn't need to be reminded every six months!0
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Wouldn't fix me a drink0
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Always drunk0
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slipped me a mickey0
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Didn't care for my friend Micky0
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Wanted me to dress up like Minnie Mouse0
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